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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22376416">Evolving to reach each other</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mimag/pseuds/Mimag'>Mimag</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Skip Beat!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Kijima hidehito - Freeform, M/M, Original Character(s), Slight OCs sometimes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-01-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 14:34:52</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>147,236</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22376416</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mimag/pseuds/Mimag</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Through time you evolve&amp;grow. A story about two blind people trying to reach the other but too afraid to tell what they feel and keeping their distance. Still, fate seems to have a hand in it because no matter what, when it's true love you're pulled to the other. Roughly based after chapter 273. There will be lot of fluff and angst. Lot of grow and humor.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Mogami Kyoko/Tsuruga Ren</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>CHAPTER ONE</strong>
</p>
<p>She started walking. She had her answer. From the very mouth of her best friend.</p>
<p>Well from her text.</p>
<p>She reached the studio where the shooting of <em>The Lotus in the mud</em> was taking place.</p>
<p>It's not that she was especially surprised. She knew he would eventually end up with someone. It just didn't add up to what she knew as Bo. No way that actress was a sixteen year old high school student.</p>
<p>Kyoko signed and closed her eyes.</p>
<p>
  <em>It hurts.</em>
</p>
<p>Maybe it didn't work out with her and he decided to finally attempt to be with someone. Someone else.</p>
<p>
  <em>It hurts so much.</em>
</p>
<p>She shouldn't let her be fazed. She knew it. Knew it from the start.</p>
<p>That it wouldn't be her. That it would never be her.</p>
<p>Even if that scandal had been a fake, even if all had been made up, which she doubt, or even if they weren't together but just fooling around. Eventually, he will find someone, someone he loves dearly, even if it's not Kana and stay with that person. An that person won't be her.</p>
<p>Tears welled up in her eyes and she clenched her teeth.</p>
<p>-Come on, have a grip kyoko.</p>
<p>She had to build a backbones. She had to.</p>
<p>It was the only way she would manage. The only she could stay part of his life.</p>
<p>She wouldn't be able to do it if she flinched every single time. Wouldn't be able to talk to him if she wanted to run each time. Wouldn't be able to see him if her eyes clouded by unshed tears.</p>
<p>And THAT was, by far, worse than him not reciprocating. She wanted to be part of his life, to see him, even just time to time.</p>
<p>Even if she was just a lowly kohai.</p>
<p>She signed again.</p>
<p>For now, she was going to keep her distance a bit and try to compose herself and calm down. So that that next time she would be able to face him without freaking out.</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>It had been weeks. WEEKS!</p>
<p>Six fucking weeks!</p>
<p>The sun would rise and fall but it was like he was in a perpetual night. He didn't feel alive, he just barely exist. The backlash of her absence spinning around him was so far worse than by the past. Well, he was also a lot more bewitched by her mere presence than before. Just knowing what she was doing, if she was okay had been enough in the past. She wasn't car-pooling with Yashiro-san and him, a pretext of the sort: she wanted to build her endurance for Momiji by riding her bike came by. Ren felt like a junker and the withdrawal was really bad. Sadness was cloaking him in a dark and depressive cape and he hadn't be able to crack a smile even to fool Yashiro-san.</p>
<p>No sign of her. No calls returned, neither texts. She was avoiding him of course. He had apologized, even if he didn''t understand why she was upset, no matter the explanations of Kotonami-san. He did understand what her friend said and he knew kyoko sort of see him as a god actor but still, surely, she couldn't resent him that much. He didn't need a reminder she didn't see that way.</p>
<p>When the rumor with Kana-san didn't downside, he had decided to organize a press conference and explained with courteous words that though Kana-san was charming, he and her weren't an item and that Kana-san had been a mischievous one by stealing a kiss from him.</p>
<p>But even then, Kyoko attitude didn't change. He called her again and again. Without answer.</p>
<p>He wasn't sure what the best course of action was. Disrupting her shooting would really be unfair for her even if it would have been the only way to oblige her to talk to him.</p>
<p>That's why Ren had been so sure that if the rumour was cleared she would have come around eventually. He had done all he could. Called her, texted her. Apologized profusely. Cleared the misunderstanding with kana. All checked.</p>
<p>He couldn't really stalk her on her work place, could he now…He was bothersome enough with his calls and texts. Her vocal mails box was surely filled by his messages at this point.</p>
<p>But she wasn't coming around. She wasn't even giving the tiniest sign that she would. And he was starting to fear the worse.</p>
<p>If she didn't want to talk to him, see him or spend time in his company, he couldn't force her. He would have to accept it.</p>
<p>No matter how much it would destroy him.</p>
<p>It wasn't even a fear anymore, it was slowly becoming a certitude. He was losing her.</p>
<p>Scratch that. Be honest, he had lost her.</p>
<p>And that's how Ren found himself crossing the door of another closed off bar, not able anymore to stay in his flat, alone, with his thoughts.</p>
<p>…</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Evolving to reach each other chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko opened her phone dreadfully and it suddenly buzzed repeatedly in her hand, vrooming and jumping like it was enraged and possessed. She had turned it off most of the time after the first calls weeks ago. She needed the time away to collect herself.</p><p> </p><p>Most of them were coming from one person and she signed.</p><p> </p><p>Reluctantly, she called the number to listen to the first voice mail.</p><p> </p><p> Half an hour later.</p><p> </p><p>She was in tears, altering between cuddling and cooing after her phone and cursing the damn man that broke her voice mail.</p><p> </p><p>-Damn adorable idiot…! Don't apologize like that…</p><p> </p><p>She remembered what he said and while blushing beautifully, curse again.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>-Hi Mogami-san, eh.. I don't know if you got my others messages or if you are too busy but… well…I know I was out of line in the car and I apologize. i shouldn't have been presumptuous.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>-Hi, Mogami-san…ah..uhm…I talked to Kotonami-san the other time and she said you might be upset about my frivolous behaviour. I'm sorry if it upset you and…well…I don't know if you saw the press conference but…Everything was false, I was never involve in that way with Kana…She just took an opportunity when I was…distracted…So I was hoping we could talk…call me back if you get this… or something…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>-Hi it's Ren again…I suppose you didn't hear my like fifteen other vocal messages haha…and the other texts but well I know you must be busy shooting and all but I mean…Could you call me back Mogami-san. I just want to know if you are okay and well …talk.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>-Mogami-san, call me please. We need to talk. I don't know what's the matter but if you keep avoiding me I'm going to-…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>- Mogami-san, no, Kyoko please! Call or answer my calls. I know you are angry and upset so let's talk …or better meet. Let me fix this. I-…I don't want our friendship to end like this. </em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Call me! Answer god damnit!</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>-Hi it's Ren, sorry for the other message, you are of course not obliged to call or see me but-…I-I actually miss you Mogami-san and I don't want to hurt you unknowingly and I'm worried…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Between the first messages and the end of it, his tone turned pleading and begging and the idea how frazzled he seems stroking her damn hopeless hopes and making her all warm.</p><p> </p><p>Slowly she shook her head and a sweet smile sneaked its way on her face.</p><p> </p><p>She tossed her head in her hands and giggled.</p><p> </p><p>-Arghh…</p><p> </p><p>-I was not really angry to begin with, just heartbroken. You can't fix it idiot.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>It's so not fair.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Fine. She couldn't avoid him anymore. She had gathered her wits and was planning to stop it anyway. And with the way its looking he will unnecessarily have an attack.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>What a worrywart.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Could really have fooled me…Any other girl would have think that he-</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She shook her head. Don't go there.</p><p> </p><p>Night was there since a while and the work day was coming to an end so Kyoko gathered her things and left the studio, deciding to offer herself the exceptional luxury of a taxi today as she was all sore and it was very late when her phone rang.</p><p> </p><p>Ready to the talk to the very person she was thinking was calling she answered without checking the caller but before she could utter even a sound a somehow familiar voice reverberated in the phone.</p><p> </p><p>-Hi Kyoko-chan.</p><p> </p><p>-Hi. Who is it?</p><p> </p><p>-Ouch it hurts Kyoko-chan. You don't recognize my voice.</p><p> </p><p>-Sorry.</p><p> </p><p>He signed with pain in his voice.</p><p> </p><p>-It's Kijima-san here.</p><p> </p><p>Why is Kijima-san calling her? Even more at-she checked her phone-half past midnight.</p><p> </p><p>-Oh, hello Kijima-san. How can I help you?</p><p> </p><p>-Really you're gonna help me? Kijima-san said excitedly.</p><p> </p><p>Dreading the worse, she reserved her answer.</p><p> </p><p>-It depends Kyoko said carefully.</p><p> </p><p>-Well, actually, it's not really me who needs help but I think we have a bit of a situation here. So maybe you could help.</p><p> </p><p>-A situation?</p><p> </p><p>When Kijima explained what was the issue, she jumped in the taxi she has called earlier directed him to a very different place she had in mind before.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat!ü Yoshiki devilish Nakamura does. Enjoy. Reviews are my food. Feed me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Evolving to reach each other chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Kyoko arrived, she paid for the drive and stare and stare. Appalled by what she saw. She searched for Kijima-san, hoping to find him outside waiting for her but there was no one.</p><p> </p><p>She signed. How did she always get into this sort of predicament.</p><p> </p><p>The institution which she was in front of was a bar. But not any bar, the flashing lights of the name of it were blinding her with their neon-like dark blue colour and proudly displaying it. <em>THE MAST SENSE was </em>a club and a private one at that.</p><p> </p><p>When Kijima-san talked about it, he didn't tell her it was a club. He just gave her the address. Airy head dude. There was no way she could enter. She was a minor. She would have to show an ID of the sort. And with the way she looked, she was as far as possible to the gorgeous women that shall frequent this place or just to the standards this club was looking for.</p><p> </p><p>Kyoko looked down on herself, inspecting her clothes, it was one of the more mature outfits she had. She had started upgrade her wardrobe a bit these last months but it was still very simple and far from the sexy type. It was a slim jeans and a faded out light blue shirt. And sneakers.</p><p> </p><p>She run her hand through her hair and ruffled them savagely.</p><p> </p><p>Most of all, it was a celebrities' club and she was still very new and very unknown. No matter how she looked at it, she couldn't enter as herself.</p><p> </p><p>Then she saw some waiters getting out the trash.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Oh. That's it.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Kyoko grimaced.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Oh, well…here we go. I'm gonna bully another person.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She needed the long vest of the male one.</p><p> </p><p>One quarter later, there was one more traumatized person in the world and the dark long blazer was adorning Kyoko. It was long mostly on the back and a bit shorter at the front. You couldn't really close it but that wasn't the purpose of it anyway and it suits well with Kyoko's plan.</p><p> </p><p>The slightest chance she had to manage to enter would stand on the air she will give off, her, her looks and her act.</p><p> </p><p>She was planning to act her way in it. It was the only possibility.</p><p> </p><p>Luckily she had another pair of shoes in her bag as she just had an interview today about what viewers could expect from <em>The Lotus in the mud.</em> It was the shoes the taishou and the okami gave her for her birthday. It was perfect. The only that would have been completely appropriate for the club. She throw her sneakers in her bag and put the shoes on. She will most likely need her sneakers on the way out.</p><p> </p><p>She pulled off her shirt from her jeans, buttoned off the two last ones and the three buttons of the top and adjusted the jacket. Finally she tousled her hair then smooth them until they give the somewhat haircut of Natsu in a more savage one and apply a new layer of make-up.</p><p> </p><p>She inspected herself in the nearest glass of some cafe.</p><p> </p><p>-Something is missing…uhmm…</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Ah.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She rummaged in her bag and got out sunglass before putting it on and watching herself once more.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Well…it would have to suffice…it's the best I've got…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She looked a bit older and a bit more mature but still quite ordinary.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I won't manage any better anyway…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>It's that or pretending to be a waiter and go by the backside.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She thought about for a second but decide against it.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>No, it won't do, waiters are often assigned some area, I don't have any guarantee that I would be in charge of where HE is. I need to be able to move freely.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Time to act. You are used to this sort of places. You are an adult woman. You find yourself sexy and you others too. You are confident. A bit arrogant even.</p><p> </p><p>Little by little Kyoko built a character that fit what she wanted then she just flew into and start walking.</p><p> </p><p>She stroked the ground with her steps and move forward to the entrance. Her catwalk entrancing her demarche in a confidant sensual walk.</p><p>When she reached the security guard, she stayed there, poised in an arrogant and elegant pose. Inside, Kyoko was freaking out, She knew it couldn't work, there was no way it would but she had to try. She could still attempt the backside after.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Damn Kijima-san!</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Why wasn't he a bit more conscious of the place and to who he was asking to come in. Without even helping them!</p><p> </p><p>The few people before her stepped inside and the guard, a muscular but young guy unknowingly to her checked her out appreciatively. He cleared the way without a word and Kyoko let escaped a breath, relieved.</p><p>At the last minute though, he stopped her.</p><p> </p><p>-Wait!</p><p> </p><p>She frozed. So close to go through and afraid a bit to be humiliate.</p><p> </p><p>She turned slowly: Yes?</p><p> </p><p>-Can I have your number?</p><p> </p><p>She blinked. Once, two, thrice.</p><p> </p><p>Grasping at her character act she answered: I'm not available, sorry.</p><p> </p><p>Finally inside, she trembled a bit while looking frantically left and right. Someone gave her a mask she had to wear here and she put it as an automate.</p><p> </p><p>This club was really something. You had to wear masks so to not divulge or preserve your identity and then you could reveal to the people you trust. No press was allowed in it. No commoners neither minors of course. There were alcohols here and potentially not so demure behaviours. She snickered at that. If they knew she was there, they would be appalled. The club itself from what she had gathered when she searched about it in the taxi was all hush-hush. She advanced herself further and let her gaze wander. The place was very spacious, lot of alcoves, several scenes, several bars, booths. All the textures were pure luxury. Velvet black or blue carpets were covering the ground everywhere. In the same colours, velvet plush booths, pouffes, cushions. The remaining furniture were nearly exclusively in leather like couches or other seats. Silky night blue veils semi-transparent were cradling and wrapped around the diverse alcoves.</p><p> </p><p>Kyoko blushed when she realised nearly anything could happen behind those veils.</p><p> </p><p>Carefully she progressed on the path dividing the sides of one the aisles peeking slightly to see if she recognized him in one booth. By doing so she learned that her estimations of <em>everything could happen in there </em>were still very low in front of the reality and she blushed fiercely.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually Kyoko spotted Kijima-san on high-seat at one of the bar but no sight of the reason she was there.</p><p> </p><p>And then, there, in the farther corner of the most hidden booth, one glance on the outline of a gigantic body and she knew it was.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Found you.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Not bothering herself with talking with Kijima-san who was, by the way, nearly dead drunk, She glided in the little opening that the veils provided.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Enjoy. Reviews are my food. Feed me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Evolving to reach each other chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko was sitting quietly on the prominent dark blue plush couch stealing glances to the person at the other side of the booth. The huge feline figure bent over the back of the couch with his head hanging in an improbable on the side of it.</p><p> </p><p>He was a lot more flexible than she imagined. She contained a smile. If he hadn't been in such a state it would even have looked comical.</p><p> </p><p>His outer appearance was perfect as of usual but it was his face. Kyoko had no words to describe the deepness of sorrow showing on his face. She has never seen his perfect visage display such a distorted and achingly painful expression.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>What happened?</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Unconsciously her heart throbbed with the sight and a mirroring expression came twisting her face too. She was lightly raising her hand to reach out when he talked.</p><p> </p><p>-Go away his hoarse voice said.</p><p> </p><p>She flinched slightly. She turned her back and a bitter smile graced her features. She knew he wouldn't wish to see the disgusting sight that she was. Even in this hopeless distress he was in. Still she wasn't able to conceal her primary reaction.</p><p> </p><p>But no. She reaffirmed her resolve. She couldn't let him stay like that. Kijima-san was in no state to help him and Ren hadn't much friends. He was a recluse. Most of the time. Kyoko had even been surprised he didn't just trashed and inebriated himself at his flat rather than coming here. It was unlikely when you knew him. Then he must have been in a poor condition.</p><p> </p><p><em>A really bad one even </em>she thought as she looked at him from the corner the eye.</p><p> </p><p>How could she go anywhere. If what he said to her in his messages had any bits of truth in it then it means he was even more helpless than she thought concerning his attitude toward women and more importantly on how cunning women could try to take advantage of his clumsy innocence and kindness toward them. She now remembered some of the comments that Yashiro-san said about him being too kind to women and treating them too much like innocents lambs and not noticing the damages or the plotting it could generate.</p><p> </p><p>-Go away He said again in a broken rough voice.</p><p> </p><p>She didn't answer. She won't leave. Even if she had wanted to she wouldn't have been able to. Not after glazing over this fractured sight.</p><p> </p><p>-I don't know who you are but GO THE HELL AWAY! He tried to yell but end up muttering in an angry shooting whisper barely intelligible.</p><p> </p><p>Yup. Indeed. He was wasted.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Completely waste.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>He would never lose his composure like that if he wasn't.</p><p> </p><p>-No Kyoko merely replied in a subdued tone.</p><p> </p><p>He didn't utter a word more and Kyoko closed the distance to feel his forehead.</p><p> </p><p>She gasped. He was burning. Was it just the alcohol or did he just ditch on the side his self-care while she wasn't looking.</p><p> </p><p>She pinched her lips irritably. Damn man.</p><p>-You should take better care of yourself you know, you have a fever right now she chastised him angrily. What did you do these last two months? She asked while inspecting around to see identify if he had lost weight, which he had she annoyingly noted.</p><p> </p><p>She looked back to his face and noticed his eyes were open and he was silently observing her. He reached out and let the tips of his fingers brushed her cheek before completely stroking it.</p><p> </p><p>-I drank too much if I can see you.</p><p> </p><p>-Yes you did she said severely.</p><p> </p><p>He smile sincerely, not little bit feeling guilty if it meant he could see her. Hallucination or not.</p><p> </p><p>She frowned but continued:</p><p> </p><p>-But I don't see how its negate my presence, now.</p><p> </p><p>He blinked once. Then his eyes expanded wider than ever before.</p><p> </p><p>-You are here.</p><p> </p><p>-You are really here! He said with sudden awareness albeit his drunk state.</p><p> </p><p>-Yes I'm Kyoko confirmed a bit confused.</p><p> </p><p>In a blink of an eye two strong extended limbs closed up on her and enveloped her in the lull of his arms squeezing her for dear life.</p><p> </p><p>A pouf resound in the booth as Ren fell off the couch and somehow took her with him on the ground but she was too busy trying to ventilate between the death squeeze he was giving her and this accrued proximity very dangerous for her sanity.</p><p> </p><p>-Tsuruga-…</p><p> </p><p>She interrupted herself when she heard what he was babbling about.</p><p> </p><p>-I'm sorry… I'm so very sorry…Hic… I don't really know what I did… that upset you that much but please stop avoiding me, please… Pretty please… I would do anything you want.</p><p> </p><p>She giggled. He was so very drunk, it was kind of cute.</p><p> </p><p>Note to herself: Ren Tsuraga: hopelessly blind to the devious side that women possess and helplessly but cute when drunk. Both very dangerous. To the perpetrator and the potential victims.</p><p> </p><p>He levelled up such sad repentant look to her face that momently shocked into oblivion.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>So…So…not fair…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Kyoko signed.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Well…I suppose it's okay right now…he's so drunk… he won't remember any of this tomorrow…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Kyoko gave up. Gave up on not acting on her feelings and hiding it completely,  for now. She just couldn't do it. He was too cute and she sort of had a good excuse so-</p><p> </p><p> She raised up to her knees and circled him with her arms.</p><p> </p><p>-Okay.</p><p> </p><p>-You aren't angry anymore?</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Damn it! How could an adult man have such a timid innocent voice?!</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>-Nop.</p><p> </p><p>-You won't avoid me anymore? He asked again to be sure while he tightened his hold on her.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Stop it already, it's criminal.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>-You promise?</p><p> </p><p>Hidden in the crook of his neck she blushed thoroughfully and swore to it.</p><p> </p><p>After a while Kyoko tried to let go but his arms contracted themselves around her even more.</p><p> </p><p>-Not yet he murmured softly.</p><p> </p><p>She nibbled on her lips repeatedly. On the verge of explosing.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>A clingy Tsuruga Ren is too cute…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>He finally let her lift her head and she looked into his drunk foggy eyes. Up this close, the pupils seem had a sort of greenish tone, it was beautiful. Kyoko abruptly caught something in his eye. She looked up closely and realized it was lens.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I didn't know he wore lenses…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Then what's his true eye colour?</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She came back to looking into his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>-Do I have something in the eyes? He asked her drowsily.</p><p> </p><p>-uhmmm…she said noncommittally while she observed his eyes carefully. The greenish tone was coming from his eyes behind the lenses. So his natural eyes colour was green.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Just like Corn…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She froze. Dreading something that was coming but not knowing what it was.</p><p> </p><p>As on an impulse, pull by an unknown force she lifted her eyes to his hair and bend his head toward her and there as blatant as it could be laid the proof of a still confused evidence to Kyoko. Here, on the roots of his hair glowing blond hair was growing daring her to look at them.</p><p> </p><p>She gasped.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Reviews are my food. Feed me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. …and the first mask fell…</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tsuruga-san seemed to think it was an invitation because he plopped his head down on her chest half asleep and Kyoko unconsciously run her hands in his fluffy hair, still frozen.</p><p>She will have to bring back to her mind his current state of drunkenness and also concern herself with the means that she would bring him back to his flat but right now she was too utterly dumbfounded.</p><p>No, mystified and dazed would be more appropriate.</p><p>It couldn't be…</p><p>Just…</p><p>
  <em>No freaking way…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>His true appearance is blond with green eyes…</em>
</p><p>She tore herself away from him and once more,</p><p>Once more looked intently into his eyes.</p><p>-A coincidence?</p><p>Tsuruga-san looked at her curiously then put his forehead on her shoulder mumbling unintelligible things.</p><p>She shook her head.</p><p>There was no such a thing. No matter how she looked at it. It was wholly and downright too big to be just that.</p><p>To accept that the man she l-… could assume the copied look of her fairy. Of corn. Without knowing. No, not copy, be exactly the same.</p><p>Her eyes rotated erratically and her head start to spin.</p><p>The most inconceivable thing was that SHE could know both of them and that they just happened to be at the same place at the same moment and would both meet her.</p><p>The infinitesimal possibility of such a thing occurring was-</p><p>But to go on the other side. On the crazy and shifted-world reality that could maybe make sense was even more insane.</p><p>But-</p><p>But, there was one thing, one thing that prevailed all her questionnements. She wanted to know.</p><p>She wanted to know Him. She wanted to know, truly know who he was, not as a name, not as a public figure but as a person. She wanted to understand this mystery of a man.</p><p>And that's why right at this instant, she wouldn't, couldn't turn her gaze away. She had to pursue and follow her train of thought and let it lead her wherever it would go.</p><p>So she did.</p><p>
  <em>Let's assume…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…just for a second…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>That the man right here…no…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>That the fairy she met years ago was…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…just a boy…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>A human little boy…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And became a man…</em>
</p><p>Memories flew into her and submerged her conscience in a nostalgic warm drizzle. <em>Entering the clearing, her eyes blurry with tears she had watched with wonders the magically beautiful boy sitting on a rock near the river…Are you a fairy? She had blurted out with glowing shiny eyes full of happiness and confidence…</em></p><p>She had assumed. She was already half convinced just by seeing him. Who could think anything else…She didn't really let him a choice.</p><p>She remembered how he had smiled at her and said a timid <em>yes </em>, how he had spent the time they were together mostly comforting her.</p><p>When you thought about it, he didn't show her real magic. Oh yes, his presence was magical, he was utterly enchanting and gentle, he show her the true magic of real friendship and kindness and did all sort of acrobatics for her but he didn't do like real magic.</p><p>In this sort of idea, if he was only human…</p><p>He merely made her believe. His greatest gesture was to have make her believe in him, in <em>his </em>magic. He <em>acted. </em></p><p>
  <em>He acted and made me believe in what I saw, in him…that's what persuaded me he was magic, he was a fairy…</em>
</p><p><em>-</em>But why pretend, I would still have enjoyed his company…even if he wasn't a fairy.</p><p>The reason resonated violently in her mind.</p><p>Out of genuine gentleness.</p><p>
  <em>For me.</em>
</p><p>-For my stupid enraptured-in-fairies self.</p><p>-I really hope I'm wrong…</p><p>
  <em>Or I would never decoloured ever again…</em>
</p><p>Other things came back.</p><p>
  <em>I did it again.</em>
</p><p>At Guam. She did it again. She assumed again. She just saw him gloriously bathing in the blue-blue sea. She identified it was Corn and didn't think further before shouting his name.</p><p>If he wasn't a fairy, just human but knowing pretty well she still in fairies and him being one as she talked to Tsuruga-san about Corn and that she suddenly appeared and shouted his name, what choice would he have.</p><p>-Telling me the truth.</p><p>
  <em>No. it wasn't possible.</em>
</p><p>He knew she still believed Corn was a fairy and whether Corn or Tsuruga Ren, both were thoroughfully kind. She knew that. This idiot, yes at this point if this was ever the truth she was currently unveiling she was going to re-baptised him idiot.</p><p>
  <em>This idiot could surely have thought that it would disappoint me…</em>
</p><p>And this wasn't the more important. He would have had to explain her lot of things on himself as Tsuruga Ren is a stage name. They weren't that close. They still aren't. It meant trusting with his biggest secrets and reasons to be someone else.</p><p>She bitted her lips, if her crazy theory was right, telling her the truth was out of question.</p><p>Then, what?</p><p>He could have ignored her. It would have preserved his secrets and identities and would have prevented her to confirm or infirm anything. Kyoko would have definitively doubt herself if he hadn't come back and thought she maybe mistook him or that he didn't to associate with her anymore.</p><p>
  <em>And he did…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He tried to ignore me…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…And I got depressed…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>So He came back…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko was going to strangle him.</p><p>She looked at the suspicious naïve sleeping man with ferocity.</p><p>
  <em>Calm down Kyoko…</em>
</p><p>-It isn't enough…</p><p>
  <em>Your crazy theories can't stand on their own with just speculations and coincidences…</em>
</p><p><em>-</em>Okay.</p><p>-Let's see.</p><p>
  <em>Assuming he's human. Assuming there is only and only one of them. Assuming the big idiot had good reasons-</em>
</p><p>Which was the only thing she was pretty sure about. Whether they were one or two, none of them were cruel. She knew he could never love her but this, this was something else. Straightforward, stubborn as hell, ridiculous, cute, teasing but he was never cruel. Or this was not the men or man she learned to know.</p><p>But then-</p><p>
  <em>If Tsuruga Ren is Corn and Corn is human…</em>
</p><p>Though in her mind, Kyoko would always consider that Tsuruga-san has some magic ascendance.</p><p>So… mostly human.</p><p>
  <em>If Corn is human…He must have an existence…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…an identity under this other appearance…</em>
</p><p>If was the only way her theory could stand.</p><p>Which was crazy, yeah.</p><p>But She had accepted to indulge and not turn away.</p><p>To be able to see him…whoever its him was…</p><p>But who?</p><p>Who could he possibly have been before?</p><p>He has to come from somewhere. But-</p><p>He was so fairy-like. Who could have engendered him to begin with?</p><p>Not any human could create such a piece of art and bring it about in the world. She pondered.</p><p>
  <em>Progenitors…</em>
</p><p>-Parents.</p><p>
  <em>Right.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I have no idea what his parents look like, he never talked about it… but he must have ones. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Like everyone.</em>
</p><p>But maybe he didn't have any.</p><p>
  <em>Was he an orphan?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>No. When I talked about my interpretation of Kuu's son, he understood perfectly what being proud of his father, looking up to him or care for him meant.</em>
</p><p>He must have had a father.</p><p>She looked up in thoughts. A father…</p><p>
  <em>Humn…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I wonder…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>What his father would look like?</em>
</p><p>If Tsuruga-san is naturally blond then there is a good chance his father would too. Or at least one of his parents.</p><p>
  <em>He should probably be tall too.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And there is a good chance one of them has also green eyes…And are fairly good-looking…maybe…</em>
</p><p>She furrowed her brows. It was really difficult.</p><p>She didn't see and couldn't imagine anyone living up to Ren or Corn stature.</p><p>And from where would he be coming from? From what she had registered, he had clearly some strangers manners. </p><p>
  <em>And his mum?</em>
</p><p>Kyoko didn't even have the slightest idea of what could look like his mother. Beautiful of course but she didn't have much references in foreigner women.</p><p>The only reference she really had in parents was her sensei.</p><p>She bugged. She integrally suspended her breath and braked halt on her train of thoughts.</p><p>Kuu Hizuri.</p><p>
  <em>Father…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko quickly brushed off the fact Hizuri-san told her his son was dead as she realized the way she he formulated it and her own stupidity.</p><p><em>"He's gone" </em>doesn't necessarily mean dead.</p><p> She was fustigating herself for her own foolishness and carefully lying Tsuruga-san down and while trying to sort out her thoughts.</p><p>There was one way to confirm it. To know if she was completely insane and bonkers.</p><p>Kyoko quickly did the math. Comparing the bones, the muscles, the length between the members and the unlikely harmony and perfect proportions between the two.</p><p>Her hands started to shake and she dazedly sat on her heels. Flabbergasted out of her mind.</p><p>She took her time glazing in the universe void before resetting her soul.</p><p>
  <em>It fit.</em>
</p><p>This maddening theory fit. To the point where she was questioning how she could not have seen it before.</p><p>
  <em>Even if Tsuruga-san is taller than Hizuri-san, it's the same proportions, the same harmony…</em>
</p><p><em>No way in hell two bodies could resemble each other that much</em>…</p><p>Corn and Tsuruga-san were perfect copies but this Kyoko realized was far more subtil…</p><p>Far more dawning. There were just enough differences for them to be father and son.</p><p>
  <em>How blind could she have been…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It's so evident.</em>
</p><p>She was convinced. So far that nothing could make so much sense to her right now.</p><p>But to not feeling she was turning totally nuts in her own mind and convincing herself of crazy guess-work, she did a very brief research in the image section. All she needed was a picture. She didn't want to intrude on his privacy by reading things she should not.</p><p>One was enough.</p><p>She was completely sane unfortunately…</p><p>… but the world had just shifted in its axes to her.</p><p>Tsuruga Ren was Corn and Corn was Kuon Hizuri.</p><p>
  <em>Fucking lenses!</em>
</p><p>She just notice those lenses and his roots and to say it was all it needed for her to discover his identity.</p><p>Tears welled up in her eyes.</p><p>It was maddening. Crazy.</p><p>
  <em>I'm a fucking and naïve idiot…</em>
</p><p>She started laughing. Irrepressibly laughing.</p><p>
  <em>Yup. It's decided. When I will get out of my embarrassed hole at the end of another universe, I will strangle him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It's so unfair…!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>This damnable man!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Damn you! Damn damn you!</em>
</p><p>Flooding her, warmness swelled and drowned her heart in overwhelming tender feelings. Blew away by the revelation of his triple damn identities and by how even more stupidly precious it made him to her. Soaking her heart in incommensurable glow.</p><p>
  <em>My fairy prince…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My idiotic of a fairy prince…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Damn fairy prince.</em>
</p><p>She watched him soundly sleeping in an amazed soft gaze independent to her incoherent savage thoughts.</p><p>Her dearest childhood friend, the one that brought magic in her world was also the man she loved. How could one wonderful thing could be as cruel as it was such a bless.</p><p>
  <em>AS if I didn't already love him enough…</em>
</p><p><em>-</em>So not fair…it's not fair Corn.</p><p>Kyoko wanted to kiss him.</p><p>And hit him too.</p><p>
  <em>I'm turning mad.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He definitively turned me nuts.</em>
</p><p>She wanted to strangle him.</p><p>First for drinking that much.</p><p>Then for being himself.</p><p>A self Kyoko adored far too much.</p><p>
  
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Enjoy. Reviews are my food. Feed me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. What to do</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Once the turmoil of her emotions got down and she stopped wanting to assault the sleeping man one or another all for-</p><p>All because he was the source of deeper feelings.</p><p>Then Kyoko began to ponder.</p><p>She said she wanted to strangle this big idiot of a man. But could she? Not strangling him clearly-</p><p> But, could she even talk about it?</p><p>About what she discovered…</p><p> Ask him about it? Or tell him that she knew?</p><p>Kyoko signed.</p><p>She hesitantly reached out with her fingers but couldn't resist the temptation and combed slightly the hair of Tsuruga-san before fluffing them out.</p><p>Could she?</p><p>He obviously had reasons. Reasons to be Ren Tsuruga. Reasons to hide his true name. Her brain was still in a muddle and her head spinning but slowly she was connecting the dots of both sides. Titbits Tsuruga-san told Bo about, bits she guessed by herself while playing the heels and more when she met Corn at Guam. She clearly didn't have every pieces, so it was like a giant puzzle with lot of holes.</p><p>But there were several things Kyoko had managed to grasp.</p><p>First his father: She knew he loved him so when he told her as Corn that his father's wings were too bigs, it wasn't hard to imagine it represented the notoriety his father has as an actor and statute.</p><p>-Of course.</p><p>She suddenly remembered her times with him at the beginning of <em>Dark Moon, </em>the word he used to director Hirogata.</p><p>
  <em>You are your own person…You aren't like your father…</em>
</p><p>The majority of what could have happened was evidently blurry but-</p><p>But, The pressure.</p><p>The pressure to be Hizuri Kuu's son.</p><p>She didn't know if she was going on in blind in folds right now but it seemed possible. That this reality damaged him if people compared him to his father.</p><p>She ruffled her own hair.</p><p>Second: Something happened. That convinced him that he was dangerous to others and every people he came close to was bond to suffer-he told her so at Guam- and that persuaded him he didn't deserve to be happy.</p><p>Something maybe linked to the word murderer. Or at least the time she spent with him when on heels' job clued on her it might.</p><p>She frowned at that. No way she would ever believe him capable of that sort of things.</p><p>Thirdly: He was fighting himself. She saw him several times. After the car accident with the omui rice omelette then after some confrontations with Murasame-san.</p><p>Everything else was unclear.</p><p>So Kyoko sort of had a vague idea of his past now.</p><p>But She thought she got the gist of his reasons.</p><p>And he if was trying to reinvent himself, she was not about to destroy that.</p><p>She could understand more than anyone the wish to be different, to find yourself.</p><p>And if he decided To Hide To Be so be it.</p><p>Even more, a growing suspicion was diving in her and little by little anchoring itself in her. Now that she knew the truth, it was obvious and she wondered how she couldn't see it. Like a certitude crawling in her.</p><p>Oh yes Kyoko knew. So yes the men she thought were two people are in fact one man and share one body and looked pretty much the same. Beside eyes and hairs.</p><p>But the thing is, though he's pretending, though he has another identity.</p><p>It doesn't-…look that different. His character. His personality. Maybe it was because she knew now. But if Kyoko thought about it she could see it. Little bit of Corn no Kuon in Tsuruga Ren and little bit of Ren in Kuon.</p><p>For example, Co-Kuon seemed to have a mischievous side quite present but she saw it too in Tsuruga-san, had even been the victim of it sometimes. Like at Dark Moon party or when he's teasing her endlessly.</p><p>And his gentleman side-not his lying smile, that was his public persona-no his courteous side to women, she was pretty sure it wasn't made up but just the way his parents educated him.</p><p>Ren Tsuruga was supposed to be always composed but she could remember him being reckless and impulsive at some occasions. Like his lack of care for his health typically.</p><p>Tsuruga Ren wasn't just an act. Well maybe at first but anymore. It's like…</p><p>-They are intertwined.</p><p>Kyoko pondered it could have happened. From what she knew, Tsuruga-san was still a teenager when he debut so it's fairly possible, maybe, that with time passing, from a teenager to a young adult, maturing…</p><p>They blend.</p><p>
  <em>His act start to blend into his personality until some of them became real part of him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I mean…Corn was still Corn when I saw him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But he did was a lot more composed than before.</em>
</p><p>She pouted, frustrated by the lack of certitudes.</p><p>It was pure conjectures after all.</p><p>
  <em>But still…</em>
</p><p>Kuon could totally have got those aspects of his personality later just as and by the natural process of maturing. Independently of an act or not. It was coherent to think it happened that way because of the circumstances but it was still him.</p><p>No matter what she couldn't really separate their personalities like two different people anymore now that she knew.</p><p>
  <em>He is one and only one person for me now. Unique.</em>
</p><p>Several times. Several she thought they looked alike when they were at Guam. And that's why it was all the more infuriating. Because it wasn't just the look, their behaviors sometimes resembled to ther other. Which was another reason it was so bad for her heart. It was subtle things really…Other times he was careful. But sometimes…</p><p>Like his way to express kindness, phrased his words now that she thought about it but most of all what gave him away in retrospective was his way to express sorrow.</p><p>It was so blatant. In both cases, a constricted, guilty, self-blaming expression would mare his face…Like he didn't to exist anymore. Like he was encompassed in deep, heavy and hurtful rusty shackles.</p><p> </p><p>So if to build a new him and escape and maybe to heal he decided to be someone else; Kyoko had no right to ripped him from that. Guessing the efforts it must have cost.</p><p>So,</p><p>Kyoko took a decision.</p><p>She wouldn't tell him she knew. She would pretend she didn't know a thing about him being Corn or even more Kuon Hizuri.</p><p>She couldn't risk reducing his efforts to oblivion out of egoism.</p><p>The little she guessed was enough of a reason to not tell anyone and to know what damage it do if she was nosy.</p><p>So, she would play obvious.</p><p>She would protect his secrets.</p><p>Kyoko snorted with self embarrassment.</p><p>She had been for such a long time. Her face coloured with heated self frustration.</p><p>
  <em>It won't make such a difference…hahaha…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I just hope that…maybe…One day…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>One day he will be willing to tell me…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He will be ready and trust me enough to tell me…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Until then…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I know nothing…</em>
</p><p>Relieved she had been able to make a decision and even understand him a bit maybe she looked at the sleeping beauty on the ground and sighed a bit before calling a taxi.</p><p>
  <em>Now…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>How am I going to carry that monster of a man...</em>
</p><p>Kyoko blinked with a new realisation.</p><p>
  <em>Damn…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Maybe I will even have to take care of Kijima-san…</em>
</p><p>She tousled her hair viciously and removing even a few hairs out of her head.</p><p>
  <em>I'm not Hercule…And those two weighted more than potatoes'sacks…</em>
</p><p><em>It's more like giant sacks</em> of muscles and bones…</p><p>The gory image it provided in her head made her wrinkle her nose and she shook her head.</p><p>
  <em>Screw it. It's not my problem if these idiots are covered in bruises tomorrow. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>It would serve them right to drink so much and ask a teenager girl to come at their rescue in a club…</em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Enjoy. Reviews are food for writers. Feed the writer if you want a chapter.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Preserve and persevere</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko poke her head through the translucent curtains looking for Kijima-san. She thought he had left for a second but it finally didn't take long to spot him.</p><p> </p><p>Kyoko was faced with three big issues at the moment.</p><p> </p><p>One. There was a giant shrimp of a man mostly sleeping in a booth. And one passed out on the counter of the bar.</p><p> </p><p>Two. She had to move those with her own and only hands to a taxi she had called and would arrived in forty-five minutes.</p><p> </p><p>Third. She needed discretion. She had to preserve their reputations. Well Kijima might not have such a big one or one anymore anyway so she didn't know if someone seeing him like this or sharing pictures of him in his state would really hurt him but the reputation of Tsuruga-san was a lot more at stake if anything was to leak out from this night.</p><p> </p><p>She sighed and called a server.</p><p> </p><p>She had been able to drag Tsuruga-san when he was ill but he was slighty conscious. She wasn't strong enough to do that if he was completely out.</p><p>
  <em>Yet…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Kyoko pondered if she would be able to do it if she train enough and in a few years. She had always been strong after.</p><p> </p><p>Anyway that wasn't the case right now so it didn't matter.</p><p> </p><p>Kijima-san was shorter and less build than Tsuruga-san so she thought she might have a chance to manage.</p><p> </p><p>The server rejoined her.</p><p> </p><p>-Yes Ma'am?</p><p> </p><p>-Hum. Is this right this club facilitate privacy?</p><p> </p><p>-Yes Ma'am. It's in our chart. We aren't allowed to divulge anything or we are fired and possibly sued.</p><p> </p><p>-Good. Thanks. Then I've got some questions.</p><p> </p><p>-I'm all ears.</p><p> </p><p>-I've got two gentlemen who abused of the bottle of bit too much and that I'm gonna help to return to the nest. I already called a taxi. And I know very well you can't really help me with the journey from here through the club and to the taxi without attracting interests. But those these two gentlemen had jackets or anything of the sort that you could bring to the taxi when it will be here?</p><p> </p><p>The server smile. Comprehensive.</p><p> </p><p>-I'm afraid so. I can't help carry them. Not because the chart prevent me to do so. But it would deserve your friends and you. But yes of course, I can take care of all their possessions so that the driver can fetch them.</p><p> </p><p>-Thank you. I would also need two pitchers of water if possible.</p><p> </p><p>-It will be done.</p><p> </p><p>Kyoko was about to turn around when the server continued.</p><p> </p><p>-If you allow me a comment miss. Though the situation seem quite hilarious from an outside point, it's quite risky of a demarche.</p><p> </p><p>Kyoko arched an eyebrow.</p><p> </p><p>-For yourself I mean. Even if they are your friends. Therefore, I admire your bravery and loyalty to them.</p><p> </p><p>Perplexe she didn't know how to respond.</p><p> </p><p>-I-…Thanks…I suppose.</p><p> </p><p>Kyoko drove back inside the booth. She could have think about what the server meant but she didn't really had the time for that.</p><p> </p><p>A plan was slowly taking shape in her mind but its realisation would be tricky.</p><p> </p><p>The server came back shortly after with the carafes and quietly put them down on the low table.</p><p> </p><p>Assuming that she could indeed somehow carry Kijima-san, remain Tsuruga-san.</p><p> </p><p>She couldn't get him out of this booth unconscious. So she had a vague idea of how to change that fact. So the use of water.</p><p> </p><p>How was she going to bring her foolish drunk fairy friend in disguise all alone?</p><p> </p><p>Wait. In disguise. That was it.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I have to disguise him.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>But in what?</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She couldn't hide his height. And even drunk and sleeping he still had this sexy elegant vibe about him.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I have to change that if I want it to work.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>So…A change of style.</p><p> </p><p>A fundamental one.</p><p> </p><p>One that pull off people enough.</p><p> </p><p>Not punk.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>It wouldn't work.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Not on a stand-alone style. It would still look too elegant and sexy. And that's his mark. Too distinctive.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Then what?</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>Oh.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She got it.</p><p> </p><p>Oh god. Kyoko began to snort and refrain a cackle.</p><p> </p><p><em>Oh dear</em>…</p><p> </p><p>Capabilities speaking… yeah she could.</p><p> </p><p>But-…</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>How much could his clothes cost?</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Kyoko paled.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>Screw it.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <em>I don't have much of a choice.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>But first,</p><p> </p><p>Let's Pray.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>To all divinities of fairies and enchantresses , I solemnly ask your favours to help my fairy friend and sempai to forgive me for the sins I'm about to perpetrate on his untainted body. I don't have a choice, I need to preserve his reputation. And his idiot fairyness was too drunk to do it himself. Let him also permit me to refund his clothes in several instalments. Thanks a lot Graciousnesses.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Preparations done.</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Let's do the sacrilege.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Enjoy. Reviews are food for writer. Feed the writer if you want a chapter.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Preserve and persevere part 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>it was a very funny one for me so i hope you'll have as much fun as me.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko fetched her pocket scissors in her bag…Lift them…</p><p>Breathed in… Breathed out…</p><p>
  <em>Just be careful…</em>
</p><p>Slowly, meticulously she closed in the scissors on the knees part of the trousers and cut a part of it on both knees neatly. So to make them drilled and let appear the naked knees of Tsuruga-san. Her face heated up before she admonished herself.</p><p>
  <em>Don't be ridiculous.</em>
</p><p>It was just knees.</p><p>She proceeded on his beautiful long-sleeves t-shirt and cut long transversal strips on it that in the making uncovered lot of skin and Kyoko had to divert her gaze.</p><p>Kyoko wiped off her brow.</p><p>
  <em>Done.</em>
</p><p>Chirurgical operation on clothes checked.</p><p>
  <em>On the harder part now…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I'm so going to hell…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let him not remember …Spare him by memory oblivion…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>For his sake …</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And mine!</em>
</p><p>She took her make-up pouch.</p><p>She had her classic day-to-day make-up in it. But it wouldn't do. He couldn't pull it off, it was too flashy and feminine.</p><p>Plus she was going to a style that could match his elegant side. Well barely. He was still masculine but she thought she could manage.</p><p>Fortunately She had also the bases of Momiji make up in it and it was much more darker.</p><p>-Breath. You are doing nothing wrong.</p><p>She pulled out the sombre mascara.</p><p>
  <em>It's for his sake…it's for his sake.</em>
</p><p>She applied it on his long lashes.</p><p>
  <em>I'm gonna be traumatised…</em>
</p><p>She pulled out eyes liners. A black one and a dark blue one.</p><p>
  <em>Into next life…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…traumatised into next life…</em>
</p><p>She applied them. Layers after layers. It was a disguise. No one should recognize him.</p><p>
  <em>One more layer…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>One more…One more…</em>
</p><p>Done.</p><p>"………"</p><p>
  <em>He looks like a panda…</em>
</p><p>She fisted her hand against her mouth.</p><p>
  <em>A big sexy giant sleeping drunk panda….</em>
</p><p>She bitted her lips to contain her urges to laugh. She needed to concentrate.</p><p>Lipstick. Dark blue.</p><p>Kyoko was going for the Emo style after all.</p><p>It was the only one that could line up on his elegant style.</p><p>She sighed. It would have been so much easier if he had been Cain heel. But no tricks or craftiness of her could come up even close to it in 45 minutes and with such blatant Tsuruga Ren clothes and style.</p><p>Lipstick on.</p><p>She took near her one the pitcher, put her hands one after the other in it and wet Tsuruga-san hairs repeatedly.</p><p>All of her shades of blues were coming from make-up tests for Momiji too. The director had wanted to try black and dark blue make-up in all sorts. He had finally decided against the dark blue but she'd got a sample of a bit of everything and still didn't store it away in her room.</p><p>They were very lucky that she put tidiness aside for once.</p><p>Kyoko smiled. Holding in her hand another darker than blue piece of make-up. This one, she just knew what she was going to do.</p><p>She giggled. The exercise getting the better of her, she was starting to have fun and getting carried away.</p><p>She wet Tsuruga-san hair once more and applied the stick on his hairs at several place. It was dark blue hair chalk.</p><p>Then she got out her own hair gel and finished his new Emo haircut with little hair spikes.</p><p>Kyoko looked at her current oeuvre, analysing it.</p><p>She bent over.</p><p>-Pfff…Hhahaha…</p><p>
  <em>He was hardly recognizable now…god…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He should not remember…he should not remember…he should remember…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It's for his sake…</em>
</p><p>In vain. She couldn't help it. Her sides burned. And tears pooled in her eyes.</p><p>
  <em>It's so unlike him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He would probably murder me if he knew…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Ha …ha…hahahahaha…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I'm taking a picture.</em>
</p><p>For posterity.</p><p>Last part. She got out some dark blue nails coating and laid it on his hands' nails. Finally she fished out an old feminine chain bracelet of hers and difficultly attached it to his wrist.</p><p>-Snap.</p><p>She took another picture of the final product.</p><p>
  <em>Please, let him not remember it.</em>
</p><p>If she was going to hell anyways she could at least make use of it.</p><p>It would have to do, it was the only idea she's got.</p><p>She had also an old scarf that Kyoko intend to use to still dissimulate his face a bit.</p><p>She got out of the booth again and went to see Kijima-san, ready to break her back if she had to do it. The taxi was there. Kijima-san was still passed out and was not about to wake up anytime soon. She put the hoody he had on his head. She reached under his shoulders and fortunately and to her biggest surprise he was a light weight and she managed to put him on her back and carried him inside the taxi. She wasn't even sore. He was really light.</p><p>Kyoko breathed in.</p><p>
  <em>One done…</em>
</p><p>Time to wake the sleeping drunk fairy.</p><p>
  <em>Hurrah!</em>
</p><p>Her eyes wided just before she did it.</p><p>
  <em>Damn…I put the make-up before waking him up.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Oh well…it should be okay…it's one of the latest waterproof one.</em>
</p><p>-Tsuruga-san Kyoko called. We need to leave. You can't stay here. It would be bad for you, for your reputation. All that.</p><p>She tried it twice, thrice.</p><p>No reaction.</p><p>She sighed. She didn't want to do that.</p><p>
  <em>Idiot sleeping fairy…</em>
</p><p>She took the other pitcher and poured half of it on his face. The make-up stood.</p><p>He grunted and then-</p><p>Just FREAKING turned around and ignored her.</p><p>Completely shocked Kyoko wondered briefly if he was used to wake up with pouring water on his face.</p><p>She shook her head.</p><p>
  <em>Even your stubbornness is incredible…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But I've got one more ace under the table!</em>
</p><p>"Tsuruga-san. Kyoko said in her best severe commander tone. You are playing. Your role is a woman. A model, she added to make it easier for him to portrait. And this woman needs to walk confidently right now. The camera is about to roll. Action!"</p><p>To her pleasure and relief, thirty seconds later Tsuruga-san stood up suddenly and stood up before walking femininely once…two…three steps…</p><p>Unfortunately the drowsiness and clumsiness of the alcohol was still in him and he stumbled. Kyoko caught him, put the scarf from one ear to the other and with the help of Kyoko's arms slide under his shoulders and around it they managed to leave the booth and slowly make their way toward the sortie.</p><p>All the while Tsuruga-san was wiggling his backside elegantly and Kyoko couldn't help let escape a few giggles along the path.</p><p>Though with each step Kyoko was a little bit more anxious and resisting the urge to look around to see if they were making through.</p><p>But somehow,</p><p>Somehow,</p><p>Her crazily-like but insane plan worked.</p><p>The resemblance and his height got totally unnoticed. And Kyoko could hear comments like some emocore punk singer or something got wasted and had to be drag out by his girlfriend. Kyoko blushed at this one. Other ones were trashy or a lot more judging. But she didn't care. She managed to fool them. They wouldn't be able to tell Tsuruga Ren got wasted or was even there. Their image in their mind wouldn't even be of an actor.</p><p>Slowly slowly they got closer to the get out.</p><p>
  <em>Soon… Just a bit more…</em>
</p><p>All was for the best when they got out of the club and finally reached the taxi. She breathed out heavily.</p><p>She dropped Tsuruga-san in the other side of the seat back and closed the door.</p><p>
  <em>Two done.</em>
</p><p>She crashed into the exterior bodywork of the car and started to laugh hysterically. It worked. She did it.</p><p>Well, half of it. But the harder riskier part was out of the way.</p><p>She still had to get an address out of Kijima-san to give to the driver and got Tsuruga-san safely in his flat.</p><p>With some explanations notes and dissolvent. And strong remover and skin cleasing.</p><p>She sighed happily after her burst out.</p><p>Drunk airy head and drunk cute fairy man out of the club and in the taxi.</p><p>Not scattered. Not mutilated. Well not permanently. Not yet.</p><p>Reputations did not got ruined.</p><p>Let's see positively.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Enjoy. Reviews are food for authors, feed me!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. preserve and persevere part 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko crashed into the passenger seat, worn out.</p><p>A voice coming from beside her suddenly resonated.</p><p>-Are you okay?</p><p>It took Kyoko a second to realize what was the problem and next instant she was half molesting the driver.</p><p>-Hey…Ouch…Ouch! Stop it miss!</p><p>Finally she dug up what she was looking for.</p><p>The driver's phone.</p><p>-What were you doing?! Screamed a little the dishevelled driver.</p><p>"I apologize profusely mister. But I can't take any risks. "So this Kyoko said holding his phone up in the air, will have to stay with me until my friends are delivered and out of sight.</p><p>The driver's eyes widened and he shrugged though not completely indifferent.</p><p>-You will give it back after?</p><p>-Of course.</p><p>-Okay then. I don't like it but I can understand your reasons.</p><p>Kyoko smiled, pleased.</p><p>-Where are we going? The driver asked after a minute.</p><p>Kyoko fluffed her hair in resignation.</p><p>-About that…Could you wait a minute? I'm going to seek that out. I don't know the address of the other one.</p><p>She looked behind her to the two blissfully sleeping men.</p><p>She called Kijima-san.</p><p>Kijima-san where do you live?</p><p>He didn't even stir.</p><p>-Your address, Kijima-san where is it?</p><p>Kyoko grumbled with irritation and got out of car. Shen then proceeded to round it and mostly smacked open Kijima-san side.</p><p>She searched through his jacket and pockets but when she finally found his wallet, there was no such a thing like a card or an address.</p><p>She sighed.</p><p>
  <em>He won't like it but I don't have any other option.</em>
</p><p>She growled.</p><p>
  <em>Tsuruga-san was so not gonna like it…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She climbed back in the car and gave him an address, more stressed than ever.</p><p>When they reached the apartments' complex, Kyoko asked the driver to pull inside the underground parking as it had started pouring rain outside.</p><p>That's the moment Kijima-san chose to wake up and he growled loudly.</p><p>Kyoko didn't miss a beat and tried to ask the driver to help Kijima-san out to the first floor but after the all blackmail fling, he didn't to have anything with them anymore and asked her to pay and to just leave.</p><p>Tiring out a bit, Kyoko dragged Kijima-san in the lobby instead of fully carrying him out. Not caring anymore if one limb or another bumped into something along the way. She must even have made his head hit the wall of something because he passed out at some point and returned to slumber.</p><p>Kyoko shrugged and carried him fully again for a few minutes before dropping unceremoniously on the ground and pulling him by the feet to the front of Tsuruga-san door.</p><p>
  <em>What a pain…</em>
</p><p>She went back to the taxi and picked the men's things and dashed with those to the door before returning once more to the car.</p><p>Kyoko caught Tsuruga-san underarms and extricated him of the back seat and dropped him out on his butt. He was sleeping again.</p><p>She cursed.</p><p>The driver recuperated his phone, got paid and flew out of the parking lot under the glare of Kyoko.</p><p>-How am I going to bring him to his door?</p><p>She was strong but she couldn't drag him completely.</p><p>Wait. She set on the principle that she couldn't carry him so of course drag him neither.</p><p>
  <em>Well it's true, I can't drag him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The only way would be by the feet and it would most possibly hurt him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And yes I can't carry him…He's too tall…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I just can't have a grip good enough under his armpits if I put an arm under his shoulders…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Too big…too heavy…</em>
</p><p>But Kyoko had a doubt now.</p><p>
  <em>Did I not explore all solutions…?</em>
</p><p>Less pondering and more searching. Kyoko was tired so she decided to just look it up on a site.</p><p>
  <em>"How to carry someone?"</em>
</p><p>She glided through the sites and looked up the frequently asked questions. Finally she found something.</p><p>
  <em>"How to carry someone heavier than you?" Available for everyone.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Use the firefighters'trick skill that they use to carry unconscious or injured people.</em>
</p><p>The description of it was simple enough and it could even permit to carry much heavier body, just not for long depending on your stature and strength.</p><p>She was rather muscular and strong for her age but the difference of stature was huge.</p><p>
  <em>Well…I won't lose anything in trying…</em>
</p><p>-Let's give it a shot.</p><p>Kyoko carefully pulled Tsuruga-san unconscious body to an underground pole to put in sitting standing.</p><p>It would a bit different than he was standing up but in her crouched position maybe it could still work.</p><p>-So, what does it say already?</p><p>-Put your right shoulder as close to the torso than you can and put your right foot between their ones. Then pull his arms above your head to your left shoulder so that the head of that person rest on your left shoulder. Hold to arms with your left arm. Circles around his legs with your right arm at knees level. Hold tight the legs and tense your muscles. Deport your strength only on legs and waist, not bag and slowly stand up. You can secure the position by bringing the hands of the person to be held by your right one in a way it encircle your front but it's not always possible depending of the bodies involved</p><p>It didn't seem too hard and it helped split the weight of the body you would carry. One part on your shoulder and back. And the legs by your arms.</p><p>It would just be a bit more complicated as she would have to entirely take his upper torso on her shoulders before being able to distribute a part on her back as she wouldn't have access to his legs immediately. Him being sitting on it and all.</p><p>
  <em>It's the only way I see…</em>
</p><p>Even if it's only 300 meters to his flat's door. There was no way she would do or could do the same that she did with Kijima-san. Firstly because Ren was just too long to be piggybagged and too heavy to this sort of carry. Secondly she was too worried she could hurt him if she didn't have a good grip on him at one moment.</p><p>Kyoko closed up on him, trying to not think of what it did to her poor heart pounding in her chest to feel this closeness. Her right shoulder nearly glued to his chest, she put her right foot between his stretched legs and carefully caught his arms with her owns and very slowly levered him on her shoulders.</p><p>She had a hard time doing it at first as Tsuruga-san's head was slipping behind and to the ground but after several attempts, she finally managed to have all his upper torso on her shoulders and secured his head on her left on. Kyoko twisted her left arm until she was able to pull it around both Tsuruga-san's arms and hold them tight at the left side of her front.</p><p>She was doing something wrong because it was so heavy Kyoko thought she was going to collapse just from this.</p><p>
  <em>He really isn't a light feather…</em>
</p><p>-I have to distribute the weight.</p><p>
  <em>Right…</em>
</p><p>In a so very slow and gentle move, Kyoko slightly shifted the weight to be shared between her shoulders and back.</p><p>-Pffffff…</p><p>Relieved she breathed a bit. It was already better.</p><p>She circled her right arm around his knees and tightened her hold on his legs.</p><p>-Woaw.</p><p>
  <em>Amazing…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It sounds almost easy like that…</em>
</p><p>Just making her arm take care of his legs' weight alleviated a lot her shoulders and back. Even crouched as she was still, she could already feel how well-balanced this posture and way to carry was.</p><p>Kyoko strengthened her legs and stably but very delicately started to raise to a standing position.</p><p>Little by little.</p><p>Once inch after another.</p><p>Until finally she was standing.</p><p>
  <em>Okay…</em>
</p><p>-Not that easy…</p><p>She wouldn't be able to make hundreds of kilometres like that. Once upright he was still pretty heavy.</p><p>But-</p><p>-With all fairness…and in this nearly comfortable position…</p><p>
  <em>Maybe two …or three at the upmost…</em>
</p><p>-Okay…Let's not presume of our strength …</p><p>But still-…she couldn't help it.</p><p>Kyoko laughed…Heartily. While trying with her mind to not contorted herself while doing so. The great-great Tsuruga Ren is at the very moment carried on my weak weak shoulders.</p><p>She twirled around two times. Sort of as a way of proving and showing it.</p><p>-Hi hi hi…hahaha…pfff</p><p>He was like-</p><p>Like-…</p><p>-A potatoes'sack. I take back my statement from earlier Tsuruga fairy-san. You are officially a potatoes' sack. Congratulations.</p><p>Kyoko started to do some steps while whispering song.</p><p>-<em>What a day…What a day…It's a good day to carry a potatoes' sack…</em></p><p>
  <em>What a day-what a day…My sack is sexy human sack…What a day-what a day…My sack is a giant sweet drunk man…What a day-what a day…My potatoes' sack is a fairy man…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>What a day-what a day…My potatoes' sack is coloured like a piece of art…What a day-what a day…Make-up suits my fairy potatoes' sack…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>What a day-what a day…I have an Emo gothic sack on my back…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>What a day-what a day…What an heavy potatoes' sack…What a day-what a day…My potatoes' sack is a cute fairy man…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>What a day-what a day…What an idiot sweet potatoes' sack…</em>
</p><p>Unknowingly to Kyoko, Ren would then be haunted by this song for months and months after the incident. Going mad in his efforts to discover the origin of this song which he wouldn't find anywhere.</p><p> </p><p><em>I should at least be able to have a little fun in this pure madness after all…</em>Kyoko thought with a rightful and proud nod.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Author's food are reviews. Feed me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Part 4 persevere and preserve</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Kyoko finally reached Tsuruga-san door flat, she wasn't tired out yet but was still glad for the break.</p>
<p>She was planning to lay him on the ground a second when she realized two things.</p>
<p>One: The process of putting him on her back again will tire her more than keeping him there…</p>
<p> Two: She didn't have the keys of his flat.</p>
<p>She started to pat around his clothes in search.</p>
<p>She went through his jacket with one hand but it wasn't really easy and she quickly discovered there wasn't anything to look for.</p>
<p>She shifted her giant sack slightly and all the endless limbs tossed around her.</p>
<p>Kyoko gripped Tsuruga-san better and close in on the lock of his flat while Kijima-san spread wildly on the floor snored loudly.</p>
<p>She stepped over him and stared at the lock. She remembered when she went over at his place before.</p>
<p>It was a card. A card and a code were opening the door.</p>
<p>
  <em>Well, I'll be damn…</em>
</p>
<p>She had a chance that he carried the card on him but for the code…</p>
<p> How was Kyoko supposed to find it?</p>
<p>
  <em>Screw it all…I managed it all until right here…I'm not going to be stop by a stupid code!</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>What a picture!                                     </em>
</p>
<p>She was currently hovering above Kijima-san with Tsuruga-san on her.</p>
<p>Kyoko coughed and blushed with the way her own mind was phrasing it.</p>
<p>
  <em>He isn't on "on" me, I'm carrying him.</em>
</p>
<p>Kyoko stepped back and supported herself on the wall to free one of her arms completely. His phone was the only thing that was in his jacket. But there was one place she didn't check.</p>
<p>Patting around his waist she tried to determine if his trousers' pockets were empty. They were.</p>
<p>Kyoko delicately repeated the operation on his backside and a virulent reddish hue coloured her cheeks when in the process of it she inadvertently caressed his butt. Finally she felt something in his left backside pocket. The least evident to reach in her position.</p>
<p>Kyoko attempted to catch between two fingers the hard plastic card but she nearly dropped Tsuruga-san in doing so and gave up subtlety and efficacy.</p>
<p> Using the wall as an aid, Kyoko gently removed Tsuruga-san from her shoulders and glided him to the ground.</p>
<p>She huffed out with annoyance from the inextricable situation and pull him to her roughly before plunging strongly her hand in his pocket.</p>
<p>She grabbed the card already singing victory but in doing so she had fiercely pinched Tsuruga-san left butt cheek and to her mortification he moaned softly.</p>
<p>
  <em>Sorry Tsuruga-san…I just molested you…</em>
</p>
<p>The man question nuzzled his head in the crook of her neck, not bothered for a penny and she squeaked a bit surprised. The tickling feeling startling her.</p>
<p>
  <em>This is really bad for my heart…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And you!</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Someone just molested you! I know it's me and that you're sleeping but you could at least look disturbed from your beauty sleep, damn helpless man!</em>
</p>
<p>She shook her head and started looking for the code. She found his wallet but no sign of any code.</p>
<p>
  <em>Of course…</em>
</p>
<p>Any other day mister fairy has at least a minimum of common sense.</p>
<p>Kyoko was contemplating breaking in when someone greeted her.</p>
<p>-Hi Kyoko-chan said Kijima-san while sitting up clumsily. So you finally make it to the club.</p>
<p>
  <em>Make to the-</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Damn drunk man!</em>
</p>
<p>Kyoko turned Eagle's eyes to him.</p>
<p>-Kijima-san Kyoko said sugary sweet. We are NOT at the club but at Tsuruga-san's flat. By the way you wouldn't happen to know the code of the door, by any chance?</p>
<p>Kijima-san titled his head drunkenly.</p>
<p>-His code?</p>
<p>-Yes Kijima-san she again sweetly said though she had a tic at the corner of her mouth.</p>
<p>He drowsily shook his head.</p>
<p>-He never said it. There was no reason for it.</p>
<p>
  <em>Yes there was! For cases like this! Useless piece of c***!</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>You drunk my fairy! </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Think it through when you go for a drink.</em>
</p>
<p>Though if she was honest, she remembered that Tsuruga-san came by his own but the irresponsibility of Kijima-san irritated her.</p>
<p>Kyoko was pulled off of her grumbled when Kijima-san talked again.</p>
<p>-He's really out.</p>
<p>Kyoko glared at him.</p>
<p>-Of course he's out. You drank yourselves out with alcohol.</p>
<p>Kijima-san titled his head again troubled and Kyoko realized it was really annoying to see on him.</p>
<p>-N-No. He didn't. Just me. He didn't drank that much. Three drinks at most.</p>
<p>Kyoko froze. She turned to Kijima-san.</p>
<p>-I beg you pardon?</p>
<p>Kijima-san licked his lips, somehow feeling the menace even in his drunken state.</p>
<p>-He didn't drink that much. Only three drinks as I said.</p>
<p>Kyoko launched herself at him and grabbed him by the col.</p>
<p>-Then care to explain why he is in that state? She asked with a dead cold tone.</p>
<p>-He's drugged. I didn't tell you? Kijima-san inquired in a murmur.</p>
<p>Her gaze was throwing daggers when she answered in a very very calm but cold tone:</p>
<p>-No. You didn't tell me.</p>
<p>-Now Kijima-san Kyoko said beyond furious, you are going to tell me everything you remember and I don't care if you are drunk.</p>
<p>She jerked him closer to Tsuruga-san then unceremoniously dropped him before attending to Tsuruga-san.</p>
<p>Kyoko took Tsuruga-san head in her bosom and nursed it softly. She should have realized it. His tolerance to alcohol was evidently higher. And more importantly, never would he put himself in such a defenceless and public situation by himself. She was now very worried. Should she take him to the hospital? He was breathing normally. It was already that.</p>
<p>-I'm sorry whined Kijima-san. I thought I had told you. I don't know much. I saw from afar a woman put something in his drink while he was in the washroom.</p>
<p>-You saw it and you didn't prevent it to happen Kyoko growled ready to strangle him.</p>
<p>-I was too late.</p>
<p>-Kijima-san. Let me confirm something. You are accustomed with this sort of places?</p>
<p>-Yes. I know a few of them.</p>
<p>-Are you the one you talked about this place to Tsuruga-san?</p>
<p>-Yes. But we didn't come together. I just happened to be there and to see him.</p>
<p>-Kijima-san. I know you are drunk but the moment is not really well chosen to give excuses. What did you tell him about the club?</p>
<p>-I-</p>
<p>What did you tell him?</p>
<p>-That it was a secured place, mostly. I'm-I'm sorry he stammered. I considered him a friend, I would never wish for this sort of thing to happen.</p>
<p>-Kijima-san, friends look after the other Kyoko roared. From what I know, it's not the first time he went with you in a supposedly secured place and paid for it. If he went with you once and went to a place you advised him on later, it means he trust you. At least remotely. So unless our definition of secured area are very different, I suggest you'll be more careful in your choices in the future. Because if he trust you he isn't as cautious he could be if he think it's a safe area.</p>
<p>Plus Kijima-san.  You should have noticed by now that though Tsuruga-san is an adult he's not very social and he just doesn't notice the cunning side of some women. He sees them as innocent creatures by default.</p>
<p>-I noticed.</p>
<p>-And if you add a fool day or mood, which is the only thing you told me about by the way, he's basically helpless in front of any scheming woman. In brief, if you are his friend, don’t advise him bad places, look after him if you see him upset or in no state to defend himself or just be on his guard Kyoko admonished him severely.</p>
<p>He nodded guiltily.</p>
<p>-Now, do you know what sort of drug it was?</p>
<p>He rocked his head from left to right.</p>
<p>Kyoko sighed angrily.</p>
<p>I don't mean to be rude but you are really useless right now Kijima-san and dangerous for Tsuruga-san.</p>
<p>He nodded soundly before opening his mouth a bit.</p>
<p>-What? She enquired with rage.</p>
<p>-I-I don't know what it was but the club might kn-know it-it he stuttered.</p>
<p>She quickly called the club and finally got an answer.</p>
<p>A foul outraged ire was making her shake with violence. She wanted to curse the culprit of  an endless pit of suffering. She wanted to murder someone then bring her back to life then do it again. She wanted her to suffer from what she had planned to do to Tsuruga-san.</p>
<p>It was a psychoactive drug, the guy from the club didn't know exactly  as he didn't know this one in particular but he recognized the components. It was a sort of date rape drug. He had asked around and one of the server remembered a woman entering the booth, leaving it and coming back later and he could have sworn have seen by the opening of the veils the woman touching him boldly. At that time he didn't think too much about it but the server indeed said the man didn't seem to react at all. He seemed a bit dazed.</p>
<p>
  <em>A woman had drugged him …and tried to abuse of him…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Even managed it a bit…</em>
</p>
<p>Fury was making her tremble from head to toes and she unconsciously tightened her hold on Tsuruga-san.</p>
<p>The server said to the manager that quite quickly after that a friend came and she left then later another strange woman came and took him with her to a taxi. Though the guy didn't understand the look he had on him when he got out.</p>
<p>She was already feeling a lot more clement toward Kijima-san.</p>
<p>-What happened after he drunk the drink, Kijima-san? Coldly she asked.</p>
<p>-He start to not feel good, he said he was feeling a bit warm and went to refresh himself and when he came back he kind of drowsed off and I went for another drink until I saw the same woman entering his booth. Then I came back to him and called you.</p>
<p>-Kijima-san. I take back what I said. You might not be that useless. The drug was a psychoactive one, one that used to abuse people. You most possibly prevent him to be abused.</p>
<p>Kijima-san gasped horrified and he seemed to sober up a bit for an instant.</p>
<p>-I think this night is going to haunt me.</p>
<p>-Me too.</p>
<p>-Stay put. I'm going to try waking Tsuruga-san.</p>
<p>-Tsuruga-san. Tsuruga-san? Kyoko called again and patted softly his cheeks.</p>
<p>-Come on. I know you are not well, I just the door's code. Tsuruga-san. Please wake up.</p>
<p>She furrowed her brows worryingly. Tears were coming to her eyes but she didn't have time to panic so she shook her head wildly until she had collected her wits.</p>
<p>She sat on the floor with Tsuruga-san's head in her lap and took her phone again. Searching franticly what were the consequences once the drug was ingested.</p>
<p>After a short while she found what she was looking for.</p>
<p>
  <em>Come on Come on…</em>
</p>
<p><em>-</em>Kyoko-chan? Why are we staying on the floor?</p>
<p>-Because I don't have the code's door and I have more important matters at hand right now! She snapped angrily.</p>
<p>So</p>
<p>
  <em>Dizziness…trouble talking…trouble moving and controlling your muscles…</em>
</p>
<p>But he isn't moving at all!</p>
<p>
  <em>Feel nauseous…Very slow or fast heartbeat…Amnesy</em>
</p>
<p>Kyoko quickly took his pulse. It was very slow. Steady but so very slow.</p>
<p>
  <em>Confused…have trouble breathing…passing out…be sleepy…Be warm or cold…</em>
</p>
<p>Okay. He had been warm. He has a little fever. He clearly passed out and is sleeping but he doesn't have trouble breathing.</p>
<p>-Screw it!</p>
<p>She looked for a doctor on duty and called.</p>
<p>A good old measured voice answered and she explained the situation as quickly and calmly as she could.</p>
<p>-You should take him to me or the hospital He advised.</p>
<p>-I can't. We have a bit of a situation here. He would do him worse to bring him there.</p>
<p>The doctor accepted her explanation quite easily and he asked further questions on the state of Tsuruga-san.</p>
<p>After a while he advised her to stay with him.</p>
<p>-You can't leave him alone no matter what and regularly check his pulse. Then if he wake up, give him a lot of water. You are sure the worse was avoided, right?</p>
<p>-Yes. With the help of a…a friend. And me later on.</p>
<p>-Okay then, like what you read he might feel disoriented and won't possibly remember a thing so take care of him. Ah and he might vomit so be cautious of that too. If he is sweating, it's a good sign because it would eliminate the drug. And when he wakes up, if he isn't too nauseous give him sweet things, with sugar. Actually, you can even give him sugary water right away. It would more easy to digest and will accelerate his metabolism and so the elimination of the drug.</p>
<p>Kyoko agreed to everything and ended the call.</p>
<p>Wait.</p>
<p>-The code. A call.</p>
<p>
  <em>Wasn't there a guardian in this super luxurious apartment complex?</em>
</p>
<p>If she remembered correctly, there was one.</p>
<p>She searched again, called again. And after quickly explaining their predicaments, the guardian gave her the code saying she was on the guests list anyway.</p>
<p>She rapidly taped 2510, the code of the lock and the door blissfully opened.</p>
<p>-There is a guest room at the back on the very left Kyoko said before pushing the door to open at the most of its capacity.</p>
<p>Kijima-san scrambled on to his feet and entered the apartment.</p>
<p>As gingerly as possible Kyoko smoothly took him back on her back and shoulders and regained the ingenious hold on his arms and legs before carefully carrying him inside his home.</p>
<p>When she reached his bed Kyoko tenderly laid him on it, removed socks and shoes and felt sick.</p>
<p>She couldn't laugh anymore in front of his coloured face. Kyoko felt like she had abused him too. She knew it was for the sake of his reputation but it didn't help her.</p>
<p>
  <em>It had been so close…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>If Kijima-san had been just a bit more of an idiot…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Just a bit more drunk…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I wouldn't even have received a call…</em>
</p>
<p>Kyoko took his pulse once more, prepared plain water and sugary one. A bowl of cold water with a towel followed and she sat on the carpet near his bed, getting ready for the long night.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Reviews are food for authors, feed me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In a big luxurious apartments' complex a loud and wild scream resonate again and again. And for the first time ever since this flat is inhabited, the occupant inconvenienced the remaining habitants of the building and scared them out their mind with this horrified ghostly-like scream.</p>
<p>Though in a dark living room on a big couch ONE person didn't even stir from her slumber. No matter the striking screams.</p>
<p>She had kept watch on Tsuruga-san most of the night. Called the doctor again when his pulse returned to a more normal rhythmic one. Who said she could relax herself, he was out of danger and didn't need a constant guard anymore.  She had prepared breakfast and called Yashiro-san as soon as the clock pointed six a.m. to inform him that Tsuruga-san wouldn't be able to work today. Or the day of tomorrow.</p>
<p>The doctor as instructed as such. He would be unable to move correctly his limbs and muscles for the next forty-eight hours at least, could be subjected to vomiting and hard dizziness and had risks to pass out regularly in that time range.  The doctor expressly forbade any work or even any activities for the next two days. So she asked Yashiro-san to pull everything aside without much of an explanation and be damn with her future doom.</p>
<p>She knew he wouldn't be happy and would have wanted to work but this time it was out of question. He could strangle her later if he wishes to it; she would stand her ground on this. That damn man was incapable of taking care of himself and last night proved it.</p>
<p>Then at seven she sort of collapsed on the couch, exhausted beyond reason and fell asleep. Her mission was done.</p>
<p>Which explained the lack of reaction to the shrieking scream clashing around while she slept blissfully.</p>
<p>Another body though bolt out of a guest room in search of something unseen and barked into the main bedroom until he found a horrified man in front of his mirror.</p>
<p>-What happened? What did you scream? It's early man, let me sleep a bit, last night was trashy.</p>
<p>Ren had wake up kind of dizzy and especially nauseous and he had rushed uncannily clumsy to his connected bathroom in a dash.</p>
<p>After alleviating his strangely aching stomach Ren had stood in front of his mirror in the intend of refreshing his face with water when he had saw his face.</p>
<p>He couldn't help the scream that got out of his mouth. He was staring horrifically at his face. Dark blue lips, dark blue eyeshadow, mascara and deep eyeliner.</p>
<p>He tapped on the side of one of his eyes.</p>
<p>
  <em>How many layers of this thing were on?</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>One …two…seven damn layers.</em>
</p>
<p>His eyes bulged of his sockets when he looked closely at his hairs. His hairs were going everywhere in spikes, he had a bit of a punk crest and worst of all, the tips of all the spikes were dark blue too.</p>
<p>He look like a sort of animal. A savage one. Ren thought about it.</p>
<p>The one with a mask. A ra-</p>
<p>He gasped.</p>
<p>
  <em>A raccoon. I look like a freaking raccoon!</em>
</p>
<p>He trying to wrap his mind around the situation as he didn't remember a damn thing! Last night was more than blurry, it was like it had been wiped out of his memory.</p>
<p>But suddenly a very dishevelled Hideito Kijima came in panicked.</p>
<p>-What happened? What did you scream? It's early man, let me sleep a bit, last night was trashy.</p>
<p>
  <em>Oh.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>So you are lucky enough to remember last night.</em>
</p>
<p>Ren very slowly turned his face to him and he distinctly saw Kijima tried to suppress a fucking laugh, lips trembling wildly in his efforts.</p>
<p>He arched a brow and stared at him coldly.</p>
<p>-Care to explain why I look like a fucking raccoon? The voice cracking just a bit in a desperate tone.</p>
<p>-A what? A racc-…</p>
<p>It was too much for Kijima and he burst out in laughs.</p>
<p>-Hahahahahahaha…A raccoon…A raccoon…It's so accurate. A blue giant punk raccoon. Hahahahaha…</p>
<p>Ren stared murderously at him. Well try to. He was feeling the beginning of a hard headache and his head spinned a little.</p>
<p>-If you could see your face…hahahahahaha…I'm taking a picture.</p>
<p>-What?!</p>
<p>
  <em>Hell no!</em>
</p>
<p>Ren tried to catch Kijima, secure his arms, take his phone, something but he wasn't fast enough and click sound in the bathroom.</p>
<p>-Give me your phone Kijima. Right now!</p>
<p>-No way. It's for posterity. And well for protection.</p>
<p>Ren glared at him but quickly gave up, he felt too dizzy. He took a step back.</p>
<p>-You better not share it and show it to anyone, Kijima.</p>
<p>-I solemnly swear to never show it to anyone.</p>
<p>- Now. Explain.</p>
<p>-Well, I apologize in advance because my mind is quite fuzzy and pounding so I don't remember much. Just a bit of it.</p>
<p>Ren turned a bit, his head spinning again and was faced again with the mirror. And little details caught his eyes.</p>
<p>He gasped.</p>
<p>-What the hell happened?! Why is my longue-sleeved turtleneck sweater is chopped out? And at my knees, my trousers too.</p>
<p>He had also an unknown scarf and unknown bracelet on him.</p>
<p>Kijima snorted.</p>
<p>-Well, you are not just a raccoon remember but a punk raccoon. And punk raccoons have cuts in their clothes.</p>
<p>Ren watched him from the corner of his eye.</p>
<p>-I will never hear the end of this, right?</p>
<p>-Never Kijima smirked wildly. And you won't want to when you'll know who did this.</p>
<p>-What? So you know who did this? The blackout? The make-up. All this?</p>
<p>-Wow calm down. No. First of all if my blurry mind isn't playing tricks on me, it's two separated people. I don't really remember everything as I said but the blackout something that happened because of-…someone at the club I think. It's was negative. When the makeover is positive. Definitely.</p>
<p>-How is this positive? Ren nearly shouted designating himself. And who did this?</p>
<p>-Give a second. Kijima shook his head to clear his mind and some of it just came back to his mind.</p>
<p>-Okay. So, from what I can remember something happened at the club, a person, he furrowed his brows,…A woman put something in your drink.</p>
<p>Ren's eyes expanded significantly.</p>
<p>-Come again.</p>
<p>Kijima sighed.</p>
<p>-It's like I said. A woman drugged you. How many drinks do you remember to have taken?</p>
<p>Ren frowned.</p>
<p>-Two or three.</p>
<p>Kijima nodded.</p>
<p>-But you were out nonetheless. I kind of remember trying to prevent it to happen but getting too late. You leaving-…No, going to the washroom…Then you're back again and the same woman too and I went to your side and she left.</p>
<p>-You're kidding, right?</p>
<p>A chilling feeling ran through his back and he tried in vain to think of last night but without such a luck. Unfortunately it matched.</p>
<p>
  <em>I would never be out after three drinks. And even if I have drank more, I always remember the events usually…</em>
</p>
<p>-Sorry man. No.</p>
<p>Ren had paled a bit but pushed aside his thoughts and feelings for now.</p>
<p>-Then what?</p>
<p>-I think I left you in your booth and drunk some more at the closest bar then the woman came back and this time I think I called someone.</p>
<p>Kijima pondered a bit.</p>
<p>-I tried to call LME but no one answered, it was too late I suppose. I wanted your manager number. Then I called-…</p>
<p>-Yes? Who did you called Kijima? Ren was getting anxious himself.</p>
<p>Kijima suddenly grinned.</p>
<p>-Of course.</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-Kyoko.</p>
<p>Ren paled.</p>
<p>-I called Kyoko. I remember now. I remember most of last night.</p>
<p>He suddenly paled.</p>
<p>-What do you mean anxiously asked Ren. You called Kyoko?</p>
<p>-Yes. I called her and told we had a bit of a situation here and unfortunately forgot to tell her you had been drugged. Kijima shook his head in shame. Anyway she told me she was coming. After that I drank too much and it's a bit blurry.</p>
<p>-In the club? Are you insane? They wouldn't let her enter anyway. And even if they did, it's not the kind of place she should be.</p>
<p>Ren was appalled. Even more now he knew that this place had drugs going around.</p>
<p>-I know man. But I was drunk and she was the only I could think about that could help you at that time.</p>
<p>Ren blushed slightly at that.</p>
<p>Kijima patted his shoulder. Don't worry though. We all got out of it safely. I remember clearly being scolded by Kyoko-chan in front of your apartment's door even if I have no idea how we got there in the first place.</p>
<p>Ren let wander his glaze in worry.</p>
<p>-By the way.</p>
<p>-Hum?</p>
<p>-The makeover. The artwork on you face…</p>
<p>-Yes? What about it? Asked Ren distantly.</p>
<p>-I'm pretty sure it's Kyoko doing.</p>
<p>Ren pointed his face, Kijima nodded, pointed at his knees and turtleneck, Kijima nodded again.</p>
<p>Ren whined a bit in his hands.</p>
<p>Kijima patted him again.</p>
<p>-Think about it. Even if I don't remember it. Kyoko-chan had to get us out as discretely as possible. I was wasted several times before and caught in pictures in that state so my reputation didn't really matter but yours did. You're mister perfection. She couldn't just take you out of the club publically, there were too much people, celebrities and all. She must had had no choice but to disguise you.</p>
<p>Ren blink once. Two.</p>
<p>-What better disguise than an Emo raccoon look. No one would suspect the great sexy Tsuruga Ren to be an Emo.</p>
<p>Kijima started to wander in thoughts.</p>
<p>-Pictures…</p>
<p>-Even If my popularity isn't as great as yours. Each time I'm at a club or bar, paparazzi still take pictures of me. Maybe there are pictures of last night.</p>
<p>Kijima quickly searched on the net and a shout of victory was heard.</p>
<p>Ren came close to look over his shoulder.</p>
<p>Above, a big dark title was blatantly saying:</p>
<p>
  <strong>
    <em>Kijima-san wasted again and helped out of the mask of sense with his Emo friend by an unknown pretty girl.</em>
  </strong>
</p>
<p>Kijima started to scroll down and pictures appeared.</p>
<p>They both gasped.</p>
<p>One after another they could see Kyoko helping them out of the club.</p>
<p>First, she got Kijima out, piggy bagging him with a scowl. Then him, half conscious, in all his raccoon punk glory half dragged, half walking with Kyoko arm under his owns, a concern expression on her face.</p>
<p>-Man she's strong. It's insane. She actually piggy bagged me.</p>
<p>Ren grunted.</p>
<p>
  <em>She's incredible.</em>
</p>
<p>Ren laughed.</p>
<p>-She both saved our asses Ren said.</p>
<p>-It's so embarrassing though Kijima said after a while.</p>
<p>-Tell that to my raccoon face.</p>
<p>Kijima laughed.</p>
<p>-She really has guts. If you ever give up about-</p>
<p>-Don't even think about it Ren growled. I'm never going to give up.</p>
<p>Kijima raised his hands in surrender.</p>
<p>-Okay okay.</p>
<p>Ren ran his hands on face still distraught by the situation and worried sick about Kyoko when Kijima snorted again.</p>
<p>-What?</p>
<p>-Your nails are a dark blue too.</p>
<p>Ren looked at his hands and long fingers with now beautiful blue nails and burst out, tears coming to his eyes so much so he was laughing.</p>
<p>
  <em>She protected me once again…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And in the most unexpected way once again…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Oh god…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>This girl…</em>
</p>
<p>-Breath man…Breath.</p>
<p>-She really went all the way.</p>
<p>-Yup confirmed Kijima. But I wonder how she managed to bring us here.</p>
<p>Having calmed down a bit, Ren looked at Kijima puzzled.</p>
<p>-Didn't we just see how she did it?</p>
<p>-Yes man. But you were still half awaked and helped her dragged you to the taxi and though my mind is a mess I've a feeling, an image of you passed out on the back seat and deeply asleep. Now explain to me how she handled you after that.</p>
<p>He snorted.</p>
<p>-My bad for the phrasing. But she clearly can <em>handle </em>you Kijima emphased with two fingers.</p>
<p>Ren shoot him a dark glare but Kijima was on his phone mumbling something about a picture and he got distracted by his night stand. Two notes were on it as long as two drinks.</p>
<p>Ren took them and clutched them in his hand.</p>
<p>After months without any contact with her, anything seemed precious to him.</p>
<p>He read them.</p>
<p>
  <em>The drink on the left is sugary water, you won't like it but it will accelerate your metabolism and eliminate the drug faster. You have to drink it all. The second one is mere water. There is aspirin in the drawer.</em>
</p>
<p>That was all the first note was saying.</p>
<p>
  <em>Sorry for you outside look. I didn't have much of a choice. I will have prepared things for you to clean up.</em>
</p>
<p>-My…How sweet. She took care of everything said Kijima who had sneaked behind him to read the notes too. Though, if that's not a true proof of what happened I don’t know what is one…</p>
<p>Ren signed.</p>
<p>-I can't believe I was drugged by a woman.</p>
<p>-Yeah. I had a hard time believing it last night and if only you knew the scold I received from Kyoko-chan. Something you couldn't see the cunning nature of women.</p>
<p>-You already said that.</p>
<p>-I know. But it was quite scary. She told me I was an irresponsible friend and to not take you to unsafe places and look after you if we did. And that I shouldn't let random women come near you as you are helpless and see all women as innocent creatures.</p>
<p>Ren's mouth gaped at him.</p>
<p>-Yeah. Kijima laughed. She was quite protective. But I have to agree on this one. It's the second you are fooled by a woman in front of me. You really aren't on your guards enough around women.</p>
<p>Ren closed his eyes, dizziness rising.</p>
<p>-Kijima, most women are indeed innocent. I sincerely believe most of them are deeply good. They must be protected and not the other way around. What are talking about?</p>
<p>Kijima hit him on the back of his head with his hand.</p>
<p>-Oy! What that was for?</p>
<p>-I'm sorry. Bur after the scold and more importantly the disaster we barely escaped, I'm gonna take my friendship with more seriously. Kyoko is right, you are helpless in the matter Kijima said raising his fist to his heart like he was taking a vow.</p>
<p>-I can't take of myself just fine said Ren outraged.</p>
<p>Kijima snorted.</p>
<p>-In acting yeah. In fighting yeah. With women, hell no. And if the rumours are true, in health it's not that good either. There are good people and bad people, man. In women range too. For example I would say Kana isn't a bad person, just an opportunist one. Kyoko-chan, good person. But the woman of last night, she didn't just put something in your drink for the fun of it or to rob you of something. She had vile intentions in mind and not very catholic ones at that.</p>
<p>-I-…i…</p>
<p>Ren was at a loss of words.</p>
<p>-Also, Kijima started again. I think you might want to look at that. I found out how Kyoko got you home. I was bugged by a memory of taking a strange picture and it appeared it was true.</p>
<p>Dread rose in Ren. Is this embarrassment would never end?</p>
<p>-Come look at this tempt Kijima.</p>
<p>Ren drew near slowly and look at Kijima phone.</p>
<p>It was the hallway of his floor's apartment. It was a bit dark but you could still clearly see the people.</p>
<p>Kyoko was in front of his door slightly opened, her face afflicted with deep worry and tiredness and dangling on both sides of her were legs and arms. Her back and shoulders supporting the rest of the body. She was carrying him on her shoulders like fireman, circling his legs with one arm and then his owns with the left one. She looked like some heroine of some show or novel and him, completely passed out, like the victim, the damsel in distressed saved by the hero.</p>
<p>He was impressed. Like in complete adoration. But he wanted to hide in a hole.</p>
<p>-Pretty amazing, right. I'm lighter than you so to imagine she could carry me would have been possible for a strong woman. Plus Japanese men are pretty light. But you, it's an all distinct level. And to carry you like that. Beside the all embarrassing part, she's really pretty cool.</p>
<p>Ren moaned in agony.</p>
<p>He was embarrassed as hell.</p>
<p>
  <em>I have to call her…find her…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She is probably at work but…</em>
</p>
<p>-Work.</p>
<p>Panicked Ren searched for his phone.</p>
<p>-What time is it right now?</p>
<p>-Forget it man. It's half past ten Kijima while he checked his phone.</p>
<p>-Where is my phone? I have work to do. I need to call Yashiro-san.</p>
<p>Kijima sighed.</p>
<p>-It's probably not a smart idea to work today, man.</p>
<p>Ren glared at him and kept looking for his phone. After a while, he gave up.</p>
<p>-Hand me your phone, Kijima.</p>
<p>Kijima pet his phone tightly.</p>
<p>-No. You shouldn't work.</p>
<p>-Kijima Hideito. Give me your damn phone Ren growled with a murderous intent.</p>
<p>Kijima took a step back.</p>
<p>-You workaholic. You need to rest.</p>
<p>When Ren eyes started to get a dangerous flam in them, Kijima finally gave in and handed his phone to him.</p>
<p>Ren taped a number at incredible speed and waited anxiously on one end of the phone. When the called got picked Ren started talking.</p>
<p>-Yashiro-san. I'm so sorry. I'm be ready right aw-…Well…</p>
<p>Ren looked at his hands and touched his face.</p>
<p>-I'm be ready in half a hour. Called the directors to say I'm sorry and-</p>
<p>-Ren, first calm down. Second, what are talking about? You're not working today or even tomorrow.</p>
<p>-What?! Of course I'm working. It's not too late to explain and-</p>
<p>A sudden bout of virulent dizziness took him by surprised and he stopped talking.</p>
<p>Ren put the call on speaker and sat down on his bed under the worried eyes of Kijima.</p>
<p>-No Ren. It's out of question. Kyoko called. You need to rest for the next two days, end of the discussion.</p>
<p>Ren rubbed his face and Kijima laughed.</p>
<p>-What do you mean she called?</p>
<p>-Well she didn't explain much. She just said it was an emergency and that you were in no state to work and that you could strangle her later but that it was really important you rest. I tried to have further explanations but she said out of respect for your privacy she preferred to differ the detailed explanation.</p>
<p>Ren groaned.</p>
<p>-What about work?</p>
<p>-Nothing is cancelled Ren. Relax. It's pushed aside. You will just have a busier Friday this week.</p>
<p>-Nothing?</p>
<p>-No. Ah. Kyoko-chan also said something about Kijima-san. She asked me to contact Kijima-san manager and get him today off too. Which I did.</p>
<p>Kijima-san cheered then pouted.</p>
<p>-Why only one day for me? He whined.</p>
<p>-Shut the hell up Kijima.</p>
<p>-Kijima-san is with you too? How is he link to this? What's happened Ren?</p>
<p>-I will explain later Yashiro-san. Thank you for the insight. Do you happen to know what Kyoko's schedule is today?</p>
<p> -Schedule but-…No Ren. She asked to rearrange her schedule too saying she would watch over you today.</p>
<p>-Wait. What?</p>
<p>-She isn't with you? She should be. Ren?</p>
<p>-I-I don't know. God my head is a mess. I'm gonna look it up, I'll talk to you later Yashiro.</p>
<p>Ren stood up and stumbled a bit.</p>
<p>-Easy man. The drug must still be present in you.</p>
<p>Ren ignored him.</p>
<p>
  <em>I need to find her.</em>
</p>
<p>-I need to-</p>
<p>-Find her I know said Kijima but still go it easy.</p>
<p>Ren took several steps and got out of his bedroom closely followed by Kijima.</p>
<p>-Man, it smells amazing in here, what is it?</p>
<p>Ren had no cure of it. He spotted her bag against the wall near the entrance.</p>
<p> He took three more steps and finally, finally found her. On his couch.</p>
<p>Deeply asleep. Looking very tired even in her slumber. Several notes were on his low coffee table. Along with make-up remover, solvent, the number of a doctor. There were also his phone his wallet and the code card of his door.</p>
<p>Her own phone was dangling from her fingers barely making contact with his living room carpet.</p>
<p>
  <em>How did she even manage to carry me? </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm so much bigger than her.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And to enter. She didn't even have the code.</em>
</p>
<p>He hairs and clothes were dishevelled and a few buttons were even opened at the top and the bottom. Making this vision incredibly more sexy and just enough of a tease to make him want to climb the wall.</p>
<p>He wanted to run to her, kiss her and thank her in his own very personal way.</p>
<p>
  <em>I own her so much…The tab keeps growing…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>She's going to drive me insane in all possible way…</em>
</p>
<p>He sighed happily. Not bothering to care about anything beside her being near after all this months.</p>
<p>A tender smile spread on his face and he looked at her adoringly. Gratefully.</p>
<p>
  <em>It's not fair Kyoko-chan…It's really unfair.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>How can I even resist in those conditions…</em>
</p>
<p>Kijima's face closed in on him to look at him with an amused smirk.</p>
<p>-My…You're so far gone, man.</p>
<p>
  <em>I know.</em>
</p>
<p>-Shut up.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Reviews are food for writers, feed me! Hope you will enjoy. Kisses.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Come closer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ren looked at her. How could he not? She was so cute and beautiful when she was laying on his couch like that. He had felt so depraved of her presence these last months. He was like a parched man seeing the first drop of water since weeks.</p><p>He went to a little cabinet and took a blanket before throwing it on her. He then sat on the arm of the couch and looked. He didn't know how much time passed but he was pulled out of his thoughts when a clashing came from the kitchen which of course awakened Kyoko.</p><p>
  <em>What is Kijima doing?!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She needed her rest, damn it!</em>
</p><p>Kyoko widely opened her eyes to a tremendous sound. Which maybe was better…She had nightmares for all the little hours she slept. Nightmares about Ren being abused.</p><p>Kyoko shook her head distraughtly and caught a glimpse of an imposing figure.</p><p>Tsuruga-san. Relieved, she smiled at him.</p><p>
  <em>He is awake…</em>
</p><p> Kyoko abruptly stood and rushed to him.</p><p>…</p><p>Once second, she was smiling at him and the next she was standing in front of him and he just had the time to blink before she reached him.</p><p>-Mogami-san, you could have kept sleep-…</p><p>-Tsuruga-san she cut him urgently while feeling up his forehead then taking his pulse.</p><p>-Are you okay? How are feeling? Nauseous? Dizzy?</p><p>
  <em>God…Don't stop touching me…No No no no…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Bad me …Stop touching me…</em>
</p><p>-I'm okay Mogami-san.</p><p>-Don't serve me that, Tsuruga-san. I want to know how you really feel.</p><p>Someone snorted in the kitchen.</p><p>
  <em>I'm in heaven and hell combined…I want to be close to you…I feel a bit sick but you by my side is enough to feel like I reached enlightenment…</em>
</p><p>He sighed.</p><p>-I feel a bit sick and dizzy and I can't seem to walk without stumbling this morning but overall I'm fine Ren said censuring the unnecessarily parts.</p><p>-You sure? Asked Kyoko with concern.</p><p>
  <em>If only it could mean what I wish it would…</em>
</p><p>-I'm sure Ren said when Kijima came back from the kitchen.</p><p>-Hi Kyoko-chan he said while stuffing himself with Kyoko's food.</p><p>-Hi Kyoko answered.</p><p>
  <em>Wow…that was cold.</em>
</p><p>What happened for her to be that cold to Kijima?</p><p>-More importantly Mogami-san, I have a few questions said Ren trying to distract her from her discontentment toward Kijima.</p><p>-I have some two intervened Kijima currently nipping at some food.</p><p>-Ah right.</p><p>-I called Yashiro-san and he said I can't work for the next two days and that Kijima has the day off. I can work Mogami-san.</p><p>Her eyes turned very furious.</p><p>-Oh. So stumbling every two meters isn't a problem.</p><p>-I would manage.</p><p>-Tsuruga-san Kyoko growled. Do you know why you are in that state? What happened to you?</p><p>Ren got a meek look on his face before answering.</p><p>-I don't really know but Kijima was able to tell me a bit from what he remembered.</p><p>-Oh?</p><p>-It doesn't prevent me from-</p><p>Kyoko grabbed him by the collar feeling fury in her bones.</p><p>-If you dare to finish this sentence Tsuruga-san, I swear sempai or not I knock you out she snarled.</p><p>Some giggling could be heard as a background but neither of them cared about it.</p><p>-Mogami-…</p><p>-You were drugged last night. Kijima-san called half-drunk already to say there was a bit of a situation but he completely forgot to tell me some trashy woman put something in your drink and that you didn't drank yourself out.</p><p>-Calm down Mo-…</p><p>-It wasn't just any drugs, it was a psychoactive one. Which means Tsu-ru-ga-san Kyoko spelled his last name coldly, that this drug paralysed people. Make them unresponsive, defenceless, even amnesic. The intentions of the woman were to abuse you Tsuruga-san.</p><p>-Mogami-sa-…</p><p>-Do I have to spell it? She most probably had the intent to rape you Tsuruga-san.</p><p>Ren had paled a bit as Kyoko was forcing the truth to enter the front of his mind but still kept his standing.</p><p>-It didn't happen so it's all good. I can perfectly work and-</p><p>-No Kyoko roared. The stumble and clumsiness you feel, the inability of use properly your muscles, it's because of the drug. You won't be able to control your body until eliminate completely the drug which will be in forty-eight hours. Even worse, the people submitted to this sort of drug can pass out several times on the next days of the absorption. It's not only unreasonable, it would be really dangerous to work in that state. You're going to feel dizzy all the time until it's eliminated.</p><p>-It's just like when I was ill and I was still able to work and-</p><p>- Damn it Tsuruga-san! Kyoko swore. It's not like being ill damn idiot! It's a lot more dangerous. A fever is something stable. Low at the morning, high at the evening and night. It's going to move about, go and come all the time. For example, if you are going down stairs and suddenly your muscles don't respond anymore because of the side effect of the drug. What will you do, then? You won't be able to react in time. And even if you were it doesn't mean others parts of your body won't be as unresponsive at the moment.</p><p>Ren was beginning to understand the scale of his state's issue but he was stubborn and he kind of thought he could surpass a damn drug.</p><p>-Mogami-san, I assure-</p><p>-No. No and no. You can't assure me anything. You are completely incapable of measuring the things to do to take care of yourself.</p><p>The giggles doubled over.</p><p>-Let me make myself clear Tsuruga-san. Last night, you both screwed up, you were both irresponsible. Now it's time to check out to the consequences.</p><p>-I-</p><p>-You are going to rest and stay put until the doctor give his avail, period. You are human and you sometimes need to rest, damn workaholic man.</p><p>Kyoko was glaring at him nearly viciously, command in her voice, scolding him severely and the worse, he was kind of liking it.</p><p>
  <em>She isn't putting me a pedestal right now…</em>
</p><p>-You don't even have a good reason to argument. Nothing got cancelled. You will be able to kill yourself at work again soon, don't worry.</p><p>-…</p><p>He didn't have much of an argument anymore but her commander tone made him want to rise to the challenge.</p><p>
  <em>As always…</em>
</p><p>-Still…I think you exaggerating Moga-</p><p>-If you don't rest, I release the beautiful Emo picture I have of you to the press Kyoko roared again.</p><p>Full aloud laugher busted in the flat.</p><p>Ren gasped outraged and stood up.</p><p>-It's blackmail.</p><p>-I don't care.</p><p>Furious, she tempted him to just try her holding her phone in the air.</p><p>Ren grumbled. Even if he knew she was right, he didn't like to be cornered like that. Still he knew she was doing it for his sake …So he finally gave up.</p><p>-Okay.</p><p>-Good because you don’t have a choice in it she said raising her chin with dark cold eyes before stuffing her phone in her jeans' pocket.</p><p>His lips trembled.</p><p>
  <em>She's sexy when she's angry.</em>
</p><p>-I have other questions though.</p><p>She arched a brow.</p><p>-Not related to work Ren quickly said.</p><p>She sat quietly.</p><p>Ren pointed at himself with his long forefinger.</p><p>-Why do I look like a raccoon?</p><p>Kyoko blinked. Once.</p><p>Her lips quivered fiercely which gave bad ideas to Ren.</p><p>She started giggling then bent over and laughed heartily while mumbling raccoon in the cushions occasionally.</p><p>-A punk blue raccoon at that Kijima added which fuelled Kyoko laughs further on.</p><p>Ren grumble a bit.</p><p>When Kyoko finally calmed down and stood straight again, warm was back in her eyes.</p><p>But her gaze suddenly turned mischievous before she said.</p><p>-I thought you looked like a panda personally. A giant cute panda. But raccoon is better.</p><p>Ren blushed slightly. He wasn't used to be on the receiving end of the teasing. Plus it was Kyoko and she was somehow acting different with him.</p><p>-So why do I look like-</p><p>-A giant punk raccoon-panda? They both said at the same time.</p><p>-Are you finished making fun of me, both of you?</p><p>They nodded with sparkles in their eyes and Ren sighed.</p><p>-So?</p><p>-I needed to disguise you. The Emo style was the only one that fit you but was also as far as possible to your elegant sexy usual look as Tsuruga Ren. And I had only scissors and make-up at hand to do that.</p><p>-I see. But why was I the only one <em>disguised?</em></p><p>-Kijima-san's reputation could take any strike of the sort without even a scratch. They are too used to his habits.</p><p>-True. Plus I'm not sure the raccoon-panda style could have suit me. Only a few rare people can portray it.</p><p>Ren groaned.</p><p>-Shut up Kijima.</p><p>-I'm sorry about your clothes Kyoko suddenly said. I will repay you. But if we could do it in several payments I -…</p><p>Both of them gaped at her.</p><p>-You can't be serious Kijima said. How could you think that-</p><p>-Well I can try to pay it at once but it will be hard to-</p><p>-No Mogami-san. I think what Kijima was trying to say was "How can you think I'm going to make you pay for my clothes?"</p><p>-Well I ruined them, it's only natural that I-…</p><p>-Mogami-san, you rescued both of us of a bad step. And cutting my clothes was your only choice, there is no way I'm making you pay for it when you did it to help us.</p><p>Kyoko opened her mouth to object but it was his turn to glare at her and she closed her lips.</p><p>-So how do I remove all of this? Ren timidly asked. You even painted my nails.</p><p>Cautiously putting aside the butterflies in her stomach Kyoko giggled and took his hand before pulling him up.</p><p>-Where are we going? merely demand Ren, already following her anyway.</p><p>-Come on mister raccoon, we are going to remove your mask.</p><p>…</p><p>Having taken the removing products, Kyoko lead them to his bathroom while Kijima said he would find a way to prepare himself a coffee.</p><p>-You are sure we can't keep him like that…He's cute as a raccoon and less imposing …Kijima shouted on his way to the kitchen.</p><p>Ren quietly sighed but made no comment while Kyoko giggled under her hand.</p><p>Once arrived in front of the sink unit, she ordered to Tsuruga-san:</p><p>-Sit.</p><p>Once settled, Kyoko took little cotton balls and started putting solution on it.</p><p>-Mogami-san?</p><p>-Hum?</p><p>-Thank you.</p><p>She lifted her head.</p><p>A beautiful genuine smile was grazing Tsuruga-san lips and he looked at her softly.</p><p>She blushed a bit and ducked her head under this warmness.</p><p>-About what?</p><p>-Everything. You really saved me there. And you were right; it was an irresponsible behaviour from my part. I should have been careful.</p><p>She nodded.</p><p>
  <em>As long as he realize it.</em>
</p><p>-Does this mean you are no more angry with me? That you won't avoid me anymore?</p><p>Kyoko looked at him with perplexity.</p><p>
  <em>Angry with him? Avoiding him? When did I?</em>
</p><p>Oh right. The time she spent to collect herself. She had already completely forgot about that.</p><p>She had flipped so much over his state last night. And then now that he was better she had other things at mind.</p><p>Like…</p><p>Him being Corn. And Kuon.</p><p>
  <em>I don't know how to act around him anymore…I swore I wouldn't talk about it until he will but-…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Unconsciously I feel closer to him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I want to know what he is thinking…laugh with like I would with Corn…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko groaned.</p><p>-Mogami-san? Did you hear me?</p><p>
  <em>Damn it! Get a grip!</em>
</p><p>-I'm not angry. I wasn't to begin with.</p><p>-You avoided me.</p><p>-I-…Yes, I did. But it wasn't against you. I had some things going on and I-…I needed time alone. I pretty much kept my distance with everyone beside work.</p><p>-And beside Kotonami-san you mean Ren mutter jealously.</p><p>-No. Even Moko-san.</p><p>
  <em>After the incident with Kana and what Moko-san told me then the contradictory messages Tsuruga-san left on my phone just before I shut it…I didn't know what or who to believe anymore…I needed to step back to be able see things more clearly…</em>
</p><p>After some times, Kyoko felt ridiculous and guilty.</p><p>She had precisely asked Tsuruga-san to not assume things with sho but she did just that with Kana without ever hearing it only once from his own mouth.</p><p>-I see. Are you okay now? Ren asked with concern.</p><p>Kyoko smiled at him.</p><p>-You could say that.</p><p>
  <em>Which was clear is I won't ever assume things ever again without hearing from the first person concerned first!</em>
</p><p>-So you won't avoid me?</p><p>-Nop.</p><p>
  <em>How could I mister fairy?…though it's gonna be a lot more hard to hide that I know…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>No…it's not that…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I can pretend I don't know…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But I'm already having a hard time not feeling or acting closer to him than before…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Arghh…and all that will just worsen my love sickness…</em>
</p><p>She looked at him coldly for a second and Ren dreadfully awaited for her answer.</p><p>
  <em>You are making very hard to me mister fairy…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Still…How could I? I don't have it in me</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I want to be close to him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It's bad…really bad…</em>
</p><p>-No I won't She smiled again.</p><p>Ren beamed.</p><p>Kyoko started removing the numerous layers on his eyes, biting her lips to hide her smile.</p><p>-I really put a lot on you she said after trashing the fifth cotton for the first eyes.</p><p>-No, really?</p><p>Kyoko bit her lips.</p><p>
  <em>Don't do that!</em>
</p><p>-I had to disguise you, I told you.</p><p>-I know Ren answered and my reputation is intact because of that. I think I'm just sulking a bit because I was the only one that had to change into a raccoon.</p><p>Kyoko laughed.</p><p>-Well…I think Kijima is right. It wouldn't have look as good on him.</p><p>Sheepish, Ren rubbed his neck.</p><p>-Should I take that as a compliment?</p><p>
  <em>I wonder…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Is being compared to a raccoon could be considerate as being attractive…?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Are raccoons good-looking?</em>
</p><p>Kyoko just smiled.</p><p>
  <em>What am I even thinking…I'm getting desperate here…</em>
</p><p>-Let's charge the second eye she said when she finished the first and Ren turned his left side her way. She started removing a part of the layers but Tsuruga-san wouldn't stop wiggling.</p><p>-Stop moving Tsuruga-san.</p><p>-You are ticking me.</p><p>Kyoko snorted.</p><p>-You didn't move with the right eye.</p><p>-It's not that.</p><p>
  <em>You are holding my head for stability but you keep rubbing my left ear for that…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And I'm sensitive…</em>
</p><p>Though he loved having her hands on him in any way.</p><p>She rubbed it again and Ren groaned before wiggling again.</p><p>Kyoko chuckled.</p><p>-Here, done with the eyes. It looks oddly normal now.</p><p>Ren looked behind him at the mirror. He didn't have any more make-up around eyes.</p><p><em>No more raccoon </em>He thought relieved.</p><p>Kyoko then took her scarf back and detached her old bracelet from his wrist.</p><p>-The lipstick is gone so it's mostly your hair and nails now she added.</p><p>-Could you throw your head back in the sink so I can wash it out, Tsuruga-san?</p><p>Now that the make-up was done, it could have the rest himself, beside the nails but the idea of prolonging the moment was too good to pass on and he obediently put his head into the sink.</p><p>
  <em>It could really have turned badly last night…I still can't believe I was nearly abused…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…But it was without counting her…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I was persuaded she didn't want to have anything with me anymore…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And here she came on her white steed to rescue me…</em>
</p><p>Ren smiled softly.</p><p>
  <em>...She is my heroine…</em>
</p><p>He chuckled a bit.</p><p>
  <em>She is my heroine…my friend…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And so much more…</em>
</p><p>-What are you thinking about Tsuruga-san?</p><p>-Just that you are my heroine. You came and rescued me. Kijima even showed a picture of you carrying me on your back which is amazing by the way.</p><p>Kyoko blushed profusely.</p><p>-Stop teasing me Tsuruga-san.</p><p>-I'm not. Though I don't to think to what could have happened if you weren't there to help us out because it's too disturbing but the fact remains. At the very least, you are a friend. A very good friend even.</p><p>Kyoko locked her gaze with him and could see he meant it genuinely.</p><p>
  <em>So I'm not the only one to think that…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>After what I discovered last night…Though I figured he might have a bit of affection for me, I thought he had mostly indulged in my childish fantasy way…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But to know he feel the same…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>That he consider me a friend…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Somehow…I feel giddy…</em>
</p><p>In other circumstances she would have not accept it that easily but knowing it was also Corn she couldn't help believe him.</p><p>-It would an honour to be considerate your friend Tsuruga-san Kyoko said.</p><p>Ren bolt upright.</p><p>-I'm not done with your hairs Tsuruga-san.</p><p>She was so focused on their chat, she didn't do anything yet.</p><p>-You already are. And it would my honour countered Ren.</p><p>Right here right there Kyoko couldn't help the tender smile that graced her lips and the sparkle in her eyes. She titled her head, closing her eyes in a happy and peaceful expression.</p><p>-Okay.</p><p>Ren had never wished to kiss her as much as right now. She was...different. Something changed. She is…relaxed.</p><p>
  <em>At ease.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She doesn't put as much distance and rightful formalities as usual…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She is chatting lightly with me…Teasing me even…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And this tender expression…</em>
</p><p>Ren felt his heart accelerated. Pounding wildly in his hands, in his lips, at his temples. He was drowning in this enchanting vision and this closeness.</p><p>Ren took a risk.</p><p>-You know Mogami-san. There is something that's bothering me…</p><p>She looked at him in the expectative.</p><p>- If we are really friends…? He interrogated again</p><p>She nodded.</p><p>Ren stared at her firmly.</p><p>-Too much formalities.</p><p>Kyoko paled.</p><p>-I want to call me by first name and only that.</p><p>
  <em>Which one?</em>
</p><p>Kyoko meekly thought.</p><p>-And I would very like if I could called you by yours Ren added.</p><p>
  <em>My heart won't be able to take it…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Well maybe I could call him by his first name without too much damage.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It's Corn after all.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But to be called by my name…Could I even handle it?</em>
</p><p>Kyoko was taking too long to respond because when she looked at him again Tsuruga-san had pulled the abandoned puppy look out and she found herself frozen like a doe in headlight.</p><p>-Please Mogami-san.</p><p>-Tsuruga-san, you-…</p><p>-Please.</p><p>
  <em>Damn fairy! What a damnable trick! Being too adorable is not allowed!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Now I want to hold you in my arms…</em>
</p><p>-Please said Ren again. We are friends, right? So why could we not? He dared to nearly be, raising the level of innocence and pleading all the while.</p><p>
  <em>It's an unfair move…How can I refuse, now…Damn man…How can an adult can look that cute and being otherwise so sex-…so sexy…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko blushed while thinking it.</p><p>Ren took her hands and pleaded again.</p><p>She caved in.</p><p>Her head turned to not look at his damn cute face she whispered:</p><p>-Okay.</p><p>But Ren heard her just fine.</p><p>-Really? Like really? He asked excitably.</p><p>Kyoko giggled. He was so enthusiastic about it. It was even more cute.</p><p>
  <em>Damn…</em>
</p><p>-Yeah, really.</p><p>The smile of Tsuruga-san was highwatted and he looked at her expectantly.</p><p>Kyoko grunted. Okay okay.</p><p>-I'm glad to be your friend…R-Ren. Happy?</p><p>-Yes. I'm. Kyoko.</p><p>Kyoko shook her head with amusement and to hide her heated face.</p><p>
  <em>Silly man.</em>
</p><p>-Can I clean your hairs now?</p><p>He nodded.</p><p>Kyoko attended to it right away to distract her but Ren didn't let her in peace for long.</p><p>-Kyoko?</p><p>
  <em>He's doing it on purpose…I'm sure of it…I would be his damn invisible wings on it…</em>
</p><p>-Yes?</p><p>He didn't say anything and she looked at him. He was staring at her in wonders.</p><p>-What?</p><p>-You are blushing.</p><p>Kyoko's face took another hue when he said.</p><p>-I'm not used to it, give me some times.</p><p>He nodded.</p><p>-Kyoko?</p><p>
  <em>He's so doing it on purpose…</em>
</p><p>When she locked eyes with him, there was laugh in his own and irritation in hers.</p><p>-You want to say something?</p><p>-Yes. And I'm helping you getting used to it. But yes I wanted to say something.</p><p>-Well?</p><p>-Thank you.</p><p>She furrowed her brows.</p><p>-For what?</p><p>-Being my friend.</p><p>Kyoko's eyes got a bit larger but she her lips stirred in what was quickly becoming her special gentle smile reserved to him.</p><p>Ren blushed a bit.</p><p>-You're welcome…Ren.</p><p> </p><p>Ren was singing in his head.</p><p>
  <em>We are friends… She accepted me as a friend…hurrah! I'm her friend…I'm her friend…I'm her friend…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>We are on first names bases…We are on first names bases…We are on first names bases…</em>
</p><p>But Kyoko started actively cleaning his hairs and he resumed his wiggles.</p><p>It was too enjoyable. Her hands in his hairs.</p><p>
  <em>Well, when she isn't rubbing my ears…Because if she keep that up, we are going to have a problem…</em>
</p><p>-What now? Kyoko asked with a smile. It's not your eyes.</p><p>-And I already said it wasn't that. You are tickling my ears.</p><p>-Oh.</p><p>-Cute she whispered.</p><p>
  <em>Did I hear her right?</em>
</p><p>Ren huffed, crossed his arms, his face getting a light hue.</p><p>-I'm sensitive.</p><p>-I see that.</p><p>Kyoko bit her lips. It gave her bad thoughts. Very bad thoughts. And she began to let her mind wander.</p><p>
  <em>I wonder…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>In what sort of other ways he's sensitive…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I really want to know…</em>
</p><p>And unconsciously Kyoko started to gently stroke the lobe of Ren's left ear with the tip of her forefinger.</p><p>Ren jumped in the air so high he landed on his butt on the edge of the bathtub. He was blushing visibly, had chills going up and down his back, his virulent hard on was throbbing and his breaths were going out in loud puffs.</p><p>Kyoko looked at him and blinked the exploded in laughs.</p><p>-I said I'm sensitive.</p><p>-Yeah…But to this point.</p><p>-It's my ears, they can be how they want to be.</p><p>
  <em>It's an erogenous zone of my body…And she caressed it so tenderly…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I'm not going to be able to forget that anytime soon…</em>
</p><p>Laughs doubled over.</p><p>-I'll keep that in mind.</p><p>Ren grumbled.</p><p>
  <em>This new proximity promise new challenges…She's going to turn me nuts if I'm not careful…</em>
</p><p>He moved forward, planning to give her a lesson but he suddenly felt dizzy and stumbled a bit.</p><p>-Tsuru-…Ren! Kyoko said before catching him.</p><p>Ren put his head on her shoulder for a second and hold her in his arms a few seconds, enjoying the feel of her in his arms that his dizziness was giving him. When she didn't protest he tightened his hold on her and she squeaked a bit but rubbed his back soothingly.</p><p>He reassured her after a moment.</p><p>-I'm okay. Just a bit dizzy. More importantly…</p><p>-What is it? She asked.</p><p>-You are teasing me too much. It's payback time.</p><p>-What do you mean, payback time?</p><p>Ren started tickling her sides widely.</p><p>-What are yo-…hahaha…Tsu…Ren…No…stop…stop…Hihihi…Stop…hahaha…</p><p><em>Is he really playing with me right now</em> thought Kyoko from afar between two giggles. <em>But, I have to admit it makes so much more sense knowing he's Corn and he's Ren. </em></p><p>She laughed again and tried to escape him.</p><p>
  <em>The mischievous side that I sometimes got from Ren was Corn…The matured side I saw is Ren…</em>
</p><p><em>If that make sense…</em>Kyoko pondered.</p><p><em>But only Corn play with like that…</em>She grinned.</p><p>Then burst out laughing when he caught her again.</p><p>Ren laughed. Feeling so happy at this instant and kept up the tickling.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Reviews are food for writers, feed me. Enjoy. Kisses.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kijima erupted in the room just as Kyoko was sprawling herself on the bathroom tiles, her sides burning in agony and her mouth begging for pity under the big masterful in tickles hands of Ren.</p><p>-I was wondering what the two of you were doing when I heard this shrieking laughs and so i decided to check out your state. I was kind of hoping you were not achieving the task of removing his make-up, maybe it could have been glued but it's even better. But what's spurred this on? Kijima inquired when Ren helped Kyoko stand up.</p><p>Ren smiled. I was giving Kyoko a lesson.</p><p>Kijima arched a brow at the new appellation.</p><p>-Oh. I didn't know your lessons were always so physical man. I think i'm gonna pass.</p><p>Re blushed a bit before glaring at Kijima.</p><p>-It's a painful lesson then. My sides hurt too much now. I was just teasing you a bit, Tsu...Ren. I'm going to be sore Kyoko said while massaging her sides a bit.</p><p>-I suppose it's inevitable to be a little bit sore after training's <em>session</em> with Ren snorted Kijima.</p><p>There was so much innuendo in Kijima's phrase Ren poked him violently in his right side with his forefinger.</p><p><em>-shut up </em>He whispered to him.</p><p>-Ouch! Kijima exclaimed and holding his right side.</p><p>-Man you're a violent one.</p><p>Ren's eyes glazed away a bit in sorrow.</p><p>
  <em>You've no idea how much you're right...</em>
</p><p>He smiled innocently to Kijima.</p><p>That smile though not a completely genuine wasn't really hiding a thread but Kijima seemed to got scared and precipitately said:</p><p>I'm going home soon but i had a question for Kyoko-chan first, about last night.</p><p>Kyoko looked at him.</p><p>Sheepish Kijima hesitated a bit before saying:</p><p>-I have several bruises and a big bump on the head so i supposed i got into a fight last night before you got both of us out but i wanted to know if you knew the name of the guy with who i fought so i know who to be careful of or apologize?</p><p>-Bruises? Asked Kyoko.</p><p>She remembered the bump but the bruises.</p><p>Then it hit her, on the way to the taxi she had bump him left and right while carrying him. She had forgot.</p><p>-Hum Kyoko said. I don't think you've got into any fight Kijima-san. But the bump and bruises might be my fault so I apologize. I kind of bumped you here and there while carrying to the taxi. And once more in Ren's hall before entering his flat. I bumped you head on the wall.</p><p>Ren put his hand in front of his mouth to hide his amusement.</p><p>Kijima paled.</p><p>-I didn't fight? Kijima questioned to be sure</p><p>Kyoko shook her head.</p><p>He whined and Ren couldn't hold his snort this time.</p><p>
  <em>So typical</em>
</p><p>Soured a bit, Kijima didn't say anything for a while and Kyoko used that time to put solvent on Ren's nails and remove the polish on them. She was just finishing when Kijima said he was going home and both of them showed him to the door but not before Kijima-san said some cryptic remark to Ren saying he was happy for him and that it was progress.</p><p>Kyoko thought Ren was going to hit him for a second but when she looked at him innocently, her face puzzled in incomprehension he smiled and oddly he seemed relieved for a second.</p><p>After that, the day seemed to pass in a blur. She made Ren eat a bit then made him go back to bed and he didn't protest much so he must had been more tired that he let it show.</p><p>Just obeying quietly with a gentle smile and a simple: Yes, Kyoko. I'm going to bed was so unlike him it disturbed her for a moment.</p><p>She slept a bit too and too fast for her it was eight p.m. She would have to leave soon. Kyoko had had also a bit of time to ponder about what she learned about Ren and she had wondered a lot about what could have happened, barely resisting the temptation to go on the net to read things about his parents. It would surely have information on him and she didn't want to learn it that way, she would feel like she was abusing his trust.</p><p>No, she would wait. Even if worry and curiosity were killing her.</p><p>Finally, he woke up and they ate in content atmosphere, secretly so happy to be here with the other until around ten, Kyoko had to go.</p><p>-Be careful and rest Kyoko ordered him once more.</p><p>-I promise. I will rest and even eat.</p><p>-I will call to check Kyoko warned.</p><p>Ren chuckled.</p><p>-I know. I'm looking forward to it.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat. Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. One step in the world</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko was staring at the sky full of buildings deep in thoughts. Lost in remembering the incident of four weeks ago. One month.</p>
<p>It was already one month since the last time she saw him. They had talked by phones when they had time but they were mostly busy and after checking on his health the followings days she didn’t get much news. She knew he was really busy catching up to the days off she forced him to take. Yashiro-san told her so and then he was working on a confidential project again.</p>
<p>Kyoko sighed, she missed the time where she was in the confidence.</p>
<ol>
<li>If she was being honest, she missed him. Period.</li>
</ol>
<p>She knew he was on a loser schedule these last days but she was the one that was unavailable. Moko-san had to leave to meet the producer just a few days following the irresponsible Kijima-Ren-revelation night as she renamed it in her head and Yashiro-san had to be with Ren all the time for this secret project so she was mostly left to her own devise until two weeks ago when Matsushima-san and the president came to ask her some incredible unexpected thing.</p>
<p>Which was the reason why she was currently starring at buildings.</p>
<p>But in her golden awed eyes also reflected a deep blue ocean and a statue. The breeze, the sight, the people. Everything was so different.</p>
<p>People were taller, buildings too. Colours and shades.</p>
<p>Odours were assaulting her with their mystery and curiosity gripped her with a hunger directed to other things than food.</p>
<p>A hunger to explore.</p>
<p>Kyoko shook her head. Maybe she could explore later. She couldn’t right now, at least. She was expected.</p>
<p>The temptation was still hard to resist. The city was calling her. Her eyes glazed over and went in la-la-land in front of the magic of the unknown.</p>
<p>Still, she didn’t caved and took with determination her case.</p>
<p>New-York wasn’t the only thing waiting her. Moko-san was too.</p>
<p>She took a taxi and gave the address of the studio.</p>
<p>Still...She wished she could have told him where she was going...</p>
<p>
  <em>I wasn’t able to reach him for weeks, now...</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>..I miss him...</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>He must be really busy...</em>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <em>…</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When she entered the studio, things suddenly become really real. People were so extravagant and loud and yet at this very place they were the same.</p>
<p>Professional actors, cameramen, technical party on the side checking every moment or so and directors shouting orders.</p>
<p>All different, but still the same patterns. No matter the country, acting was acting after all.</p>
<p>And for the first time Kyoko stepped on this land ground, she didn't feel as disoriented as before.</p>
<p>She breathed with relief, slipping in familiar skin, surrounding and all.</p>
<p>Inside the studio she could at least feel at ease.</p>
<p>Kyoko looked around for Moko-san and quickly spotted her. She was the only Asian woman she could see at the moment, maybe it helped.</p>
<p>She made her way to her wondering if she was being biased by the familiar atmosphere that studios were usually giving.</p>
<p>Though she would soon discover that her first appreciation of it was correct and that no matter the place people would act, gossip, get angry or gang up on people that displeased them. Even more so in America.</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Weeks went by and with time passing her miss for one certain hidden fairy grew but Kyoko had to admit she liked the place and adapted herself quite easily to it.</p>
<p>Well okay, she had to acknowledge that her very good comprehension of English helped her a lot to blend in and to support Moko-san when she needed it.</p>
<p> But really. They could be professionals all right when demanded on. They could be nice too.</p>
<p>The biggest differences were their manners, some were really rude and trashy in their behaviours when others would be at least polite all proportion given and cultural differences added.</p>
<p>Just more loud in general.</p>
<p>But there was something good to this more casual way of being. You could be more straightforward here. Mainly just be honest without round-about. And most of all, it was warmer. Well, Kyoko didn't really like the complete strangers getting touchy-freely but otherwise people were just more affectionate, warmer in their contacts with people, more relaxed; though in a nosy way sometimes she conceded.</p>
<p>All in all and though there were pro and con, she decided she appreciated what she had seen of America so far.</p>
<p>Ah. But there was one big issue. The food. Kyoko was really having a hard time adapting herself to the food here. Too rich, too big. Just too…Too much.</p>
<p>Since she was here, she had become the shadow of Moko-san. Using what she learned while being Momiji, she made herself as discreet as a wall, followed moko-san around, providing explanations or playing translator in both ways and nurturing her eyes with American acting when she wasn't needed. It was a bit weird at first, sometimes expressed differently than she was accustomed to, sometimes with more special effects, sometimes more extreme but also a bit too artificial time to time. There was  good and  bad but it was acting and she loved it.</p>
<p>She was currently helping Moko-san to translate a very complexed part of her script when the diva of a man busted through the studio in an angry huff before going straight to his trailer and ordering the kind staff to bring him a coffee you could only find at the side of the city. Again.</p>
<p>
  <em>Cedric Benneth. Or more like the most arrogant jerk actor-like she has ever met.</em>
</p>
<p>He was even beating Sho. Big time.</p>
<p>Because Sho was arrogant and selfish but if you scrapped the surface, you could still find kindness behind his façade. He would never hurt another just for the fun of it. He was all barking, bravado and cool arrogant mask but behind he was an idiot and a bit of a brat. Kyoko realized that now. How could she not, compared to the unspeakable.</p>
<p>Not that this jerk of a man was currently doing was really bad besides being conceited as hell and unprofessional but there was two things.</p>
<p>What Kyoko noticed first was how he treated others actors and staff or just others in general. It wasn't even a question of being rude. He seemed to be able to be polite at times. No. But he would look down on everything and everyone. He could really be rotten vicious in his way of speaking to others. And wouldn't hesitate to put down anyone that displease him or to whispers malicious words in directors or colleagues' ears about any newbie or staff that he didn't like. Worse, he had apparently power in the industry, family in it and was quite aware that no one could really go against him or stop him and knew damn well how to use that power so Kyoko did happen to witness one or two occurrences where he managed to not get fire people but to fire them directly. In short, he was toxic and bad.</p>
<p>Mindful of that and thoroughfully disgusted by his mere presence, Kyoko did her upmost to avoid him and to avoid Moko-san to cross path with him and was successful in it for most of the time until one their shared scene came up. Then, to Kyoko's horror, he tried to flirt with Moko-san in the most gross obscene way. Fortunately, her prideful Moko-san just ignored him and pretended she didn't understand what he was saying.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A few days later.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Beyond joy, Kyoko was reading with relief a mail. From Ren.</p>
<p>"<em>Hello Kyoko,</em></p>
<p>She blushed again while imagining him saying her first name. Kyoko wasn't sure she would ever get used to it, no matter how much the mere thing made her giddy and how much she loved it.</p>
<p>"<em>Hello Kyoko,</em></p>
<p>
  <em>How are you? </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I learned from Yashiro you're helping Kotonami-san with something but that as a love me task in which the president was involved, he didn't really know the details, I would love to hear them from you. If you are allowed to, of course. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm sorry for being unavailable for so long, my schedule loosened up a bit so I was wondering if we could meet up when you have time?  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Ah, I swear I ate all along the time though I'm sure you wouldn't legit the food I got into my organism to work. But I did eat time to time.</em>
</p>
<p>Kyoko glared at her phone in annoyance at that.</p>
<p>…<em>Hope to hear from you soon,</em></p>
<p>
  <em>Ren."</em>
</p>
<p>She was surprised he didn't know she was in the States.</p>
<p>
  <em>I thought for sure, Yashiro-san would have known and told him…</em>
</p>
<p>Bennet's friends, his *gang* and him came closer to her though she was sure they didn't notice her while she started answering the mail.</p>
<p>
  <em>"Hello Ren,</em>
</p>
<p>Double blushes.</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm glad your schedule is a bit lighter. Hope you have time to rest a bit now, though it's most certainly not the case. Your relationship with food is becoming more and more appalling if I understanding it well, we will talk about it.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I apologize but I'm not in Japan right now. I'm in America, in New-York to be precise. The love me job which I'm in is helping Moko-san in her English and at her new role in the American movie so I won't be able to meet up with you for at least two or three more weeks.</em>
</p>
<p>The men around Bennet-san started to laugh very loudly and</p>
<p>
  <em>I didn't have to sign any legacy secrecy so as long as I don't shout the all scenario out, I think I can talk about it rather freely. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Hope you're well, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Eat! True food! Or the consequences will be dreadful for you. It's a promise.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Mogami Kyoko"</em>
</p>
<p>The men laughed again while Bennet-san gloated with a malicious smile plastered on his face and though she really didn't want to hear it, she was too close for it to not happen.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> This bragging would be the second and most horrific thing that will raise issues and nightmares in Kyoko with Cedric Bennet-san.</p>
<p>He wasn't the gloating the main issue. Though Kyoko would have expected a bit more maturity from a twenty-two years old guy. But maybe she was biased by the other and closest twenty one years old man she knew. He was one of the more mature men she knew and even him had his moments of childishness after all.</p>
<p>Still, it wasn't the gloating. No, it was the nasty cruel subject of the boast.</p>
<p>His friends had apparently asked him how he got rid of actors or people that wouldn't cave in front of him and were good enough to not be just replaced.</p>
<p>Bennet-san had raised his palm and hit it with his fist.</p>
<p>
  <em>-"Brutal force. Most people would rather preserve their life or wouldn't want to be hurt than keep a role or even a place in the industry. It's the best way to clean the path. Plus I quite enjoy the activity. Beating them to a pulp is a good stress-release."</em>
</p>
<p>His friends had applauded vigorously.</p>
<p>Now, seeing the enthusiasm of his comrades, he continued:</p>
<p>-I do this since I'm a young teenager; some would even say I was still a child when I started using this "method".</p>
<p>-Come on dude. You're kidding.</p>
<p>-Nah. I started early for a very good reason you see. I couldn't stand some brat at that time. The kid had it all and was just using his parents' coattail. Didn't have any talent if you ask me but all directors would be sweet-talking him and just asked him to do the same as his dad. The kid was a copy-doll of his dad at this point. But it was still easy for him to get roles. So I started roughing him a bit, see. Getting fired or bully him on the sides. One or two bruises wouldn't break him even at that age, see.</p>
<p>Bile began to pile up in her throat and a dreadful sickly feeling turned her stomach upside down.</p>
<p>-Seriously? That soon, man you're scary. What happened after that?</p>
<p>Bennet-san grimaced like he tasted a bad thought before answering.</p>
<p>-Bah. Nothing much. We became teenagers and it came to full-straight fights which were fun for a while because he wouldn't answer, he would let himself be beaten and neither would he tell his parents, never understood why though. Then at the end he started to fight back and I used the help of some to shut him down because the dude had become pretty strong and then I don't really remember. It ended badly or something and the guy disappeared.</p>
<p>-Man, was there even someone like that? Stop bullshitting us. With famous parents we would know too.</p>
<p>-There was answered another. You are just too young and too new in the industry to remember. But you can't be seriously talking about him?</p>
<p>-I see you got it said Bennet-san smugly.</p>
<p>The other guy kept going.</p>
<p>-Like for real? The one you bullied was -…him?</p>
<p>-Yeah. It was he said with wicked smile.</p>
<p>-Who? Tell me guys.</p>
<p>-…</p>
<p>-Kuon Hizuri they both said at the same time.</p>
<p>Inexplicably, they started feeling cold and chill run up their backs while they felt least and least at ease so they decided to move away quickly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>…</p>
<p>Rage thick in her stomach and murderous glare, the pain and the anger were so intense her vision was blurring and darkening so kyoko left the studio to calm down.</p>
<p>She wanted to vomit.</p>
<p>Cedric Bennet. No, he didn't deserve to be called by his name. That trash.</p>
<p>That trash of a man was the former torturer of her sweet fairy sempai friend.</p>
<p>She wanted to cry her eyes out for her friend.</p>
<p>
  <em>How much should he had suffered!  Oh Ren.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>My poor Corn…</em>
</p>
<p>Finally, tears came and she wailed. Wailed in silent, breathy outraged raging screams on the misery people inflicted to the one she loves.</p>
<p>When she evacuated enough of the pain she felt for Ren, rage came back in full force.</p>
<p>She wanted to murder him.</p>
<p>
  <em>Trashy jerk.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I still have a job to do though…</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Moko-san needs me.</em>
</p>
<p>She had to control her temper and put a calm front if she ever wanted to go back to the studio and do her job. She had to.</p>
<p>Kyoko gritted her teeth with a last dangerous light in the eyes.</p>
<p>It will be the hardest thing she would have to do in a long time.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Reviews are food for authors, feed me! Enjoy. Kisses.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Two steps in the world</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own Skip Beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>America? What? When?</em>
</p>
<p>Ren was at a photoshoot, on a break and had turned back on his phone just a few minutes ago. He was in a backroom, hiding from Yashiro who had been stalking him in the absolute intention to make him swallow damn food while had surreptitiously disappeared.</p>
<p>He was trying to eat. Really. For her.</p>
<p>But the food they proposed here was really cheap and just the smell of it had make him nauseous so he had give up for today.</p>
<p>He was sipping bad coffee and grimacing at the taste when a chipping sound had resonated in the quiet empty room.</p>
<p>Ren had jumped a good inch in the air. Only once person could have sent it. Possibly. He had send her a message just one quarter ago and wasn't talking with anyone regularly. Nor Kijima and even her it hadn't been often this last month as he had been really busy.</p>
<p>He took his phone. It WAS from her.</p>
<p>He opened it with trepidation. Ren was hoping he would be able to see her soon. He has greatly missed her. But before that, he just wanted to hear from her. How was she? What was she doing? Really, any details would do. Anything from her would bring him joy. Always.</p>
<p> And recently just when they were able to close up…</p>
<p>But no, he had to be too busy for them to be even able to see each other. For the whole damn month.</p>
<p>They were even on first name bases, for heaven miraculous sake!</p>
<p>They weren't even able to keep contact by phones.</p>
<p>Worse. Since she literally saved him, since the moments in his bathroom; he couldn't forget. He couldn't help it. Every instant of intimacy was ghosting him, clinging to him with something simple. He was becoming greedier. He wanted more. Every contact was like droplet of water to a thirsty man. Every smile, every moment in her company were stirring his desire for more of it, for closeness, for her love, for her touch; for the deep yearning of every next moments of his life being spent in her embrace. </p>
<p>The perspectives. These tiny little moments of closeness lightened his world and eyes on the numerous "what could be" hiding in the future.</p>
<p>What if it was real?</p>
<p>What could it be to be that friendly all the time? What could it be to be that close all the time?</p>
<p>More.</p>
<p>What could it be to interact with her so freely?</p>
<p>Ren's eyes closed on a bright and warm but blurry clouded imaginary picture of a future he dreamt about that his invisible fingers could in his head, grasped.</p>
<p>To never let go.</p>
<p>For the first time since this deep sickness, since those feelings had clawed at his very being, at his heart until he wasn't his own anymore one question was plaguing his mind day and night reverberating with insane urge in his head.</p>
<p>What could They be?</p>
<p>…If we were together…</p>
<p>…</p>
<p>
  <em>What could we be?</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>…</em>
</p>
<p>The eyes still closed, Ren smiled, amused.</p>
<p>He was doomed.</p>
<p>Doomed to invisible endless torture.</p>
<p>-Just because of some droplets of sweet closeness.</p>
<p>He erupted in a short fractured laugh.</p>
<p>-What a flame to be burned He whispered.</p>
<p>Ren cracked open his eyes to his phone.</p>
<p>-Let's hit the nail in my coffin.</p>
<p>He started to read.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>…</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>He was waiting on the side, talking to one of the dudes he was hanging on with recently and getting seriously impatient with pretty much everything. First of all, the staffs had once again forgot to bring him his special smoked peppery cinnamon paprika chocolate cream coffee, some babbling excuse about the thing being out of it.</p>
<p>He didn't care. It was inacceptable and it put a damper on his mood right at the morning.</p>
<p>Second, He was getting frustrated. He hadn't had sex in a few weeks now. Last time was when he used his recent female make up staff for this movie and though it was enjoyable, the female was not really into it and tried to fight nature all along. Hollowly trying to scream while he was giving her backside the honour to be revered and roughened up thoroughfully by the brutal thrusts of his shalf. There was a bit of blood but good sex had always some if you asked him and she seemed to have liked it alright, she couldn’t even get up after, she was nearly unconscious. And anyway, beside sex women were a pain in the ass; they were just good to open their legs from his point of view. So they just should be happy to receive attention from men.</p>
<p> Well no matter, it wasn't the first time he had his fun with females staffs at movies. She could go babbling lies all around, everyone knew it was better they didn't mess with him and try to deny him anything. The ones who couldn't play the game with this rules would just be replaced and that was it.</p>
<p>But then he had saw the Asian girls that came up and recently became obsessed with the long dark hair beauty that was working on this movie with him.</p>
<p>He wanted her. But she was like really cold and didn't seem to speak clearly English, though it could be an advantage latter but right now it was making hard to make an advance.</p>
<p>Then he had thought he could try to woe the other, the translator girl, she was rather plain and didn't have much curves but still had elegance and well, an hole was an hole. And he wanted a taste from the exotic.</p>
<p>But every single time their eyes had crossed and he had tried to smile, he would have chills run up his back. Though she would keep the polite smile up, her eyes would always turned a murderous icy rage when they looked at him. And he would always take a step back.</p>
<p>Cedric wondered. It was not often such an animosity was expressed at him, it was interesting but chilling.</p>
<p>No, not often. Actually, he knew only once other occurrence of such murderous intention.</p>
<p>That guy. The night they fight without reason.</p>
<p> That was the only other time he crossed such a raging eyes directed at him.</p>
<p>He started avoiding her after this epiphany.</p>
<p>Really, this movie was becoming such a pain. Most of all, he was bored, he was already doing a favour to the director by acting in this movie, he wasn't even interested in the role. It was too dark, blood, death and all. Not his knack.</p>
<p>He had already managed to make some changes to accommodate him here and there but it was still too dark.</p>
<p>And damn, those other actors were so incompetents; this curly blond teenager girl here was such a pain from what he could tell. Though, all things considered, he wouldn't mind put her around him.</p>
<p>Cedric was nonchalantly observing the backside of said girl when his scene with her came. Less than thrilled he still pulled himself away from the wall and advanced with aggravation. Already thinking about a way to get her out of this role and on him on the side.</p>
<p>…</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>Here he goes again…</em>
</p>
<p>Kyoko didn't know how much longer she could tolerate it. She knew very well she had no power at all in the studio, in this stranger country.  Plus rules were rules and directors were usually the ones to take decisions. She wasn't even an actress here, just a support for her friend. Still, he was constantly abusing his position for anything and the atmosphere on set was so dire than several people already quit with some excuses.</p>
<p>Plus it was the fifth. In the last weeks. Well, mostly since they were there.</p>
<p>It was the fifth person he got fired. And just for absurd whims.</p>
<p>Well, Kyoko had to admit she was most certainly not neutral on his case, knowing what he did to <em>her </em>innocent Ren. She wanted to annihilate him most of the time even when he was doing absolutely nothing. So when he Was actually doing something bad which was not a rarity; she was fantasying on planning his gore murder then to bring him back then kill him again then bring him back then torture him and kill in a new fun way. She had never felt such a murderous calculative rage for anyone and Kyoko didn't even know she could be like that.</p>
<p>Still, it shouldn't have surprised her. He had hurt the person she loved. Deeply. She won't ever be able to be friend or look at him in a favourable eye. To know he had bullied him most of his teenage years and that whatever the reason he hadn't defend himself until the point of no return when he had just exploded. Well, she supposed anyway.</p>
<p>All those thoughts, those images of him hurting, tortured, discriminated were making her see bloody red pain and death and getting out the worse side of her out. The enraged side of her anyway.</p>
<p>She was trying to stay calm and managed most of the times but-…</p>
<p>Without even taking into account the terrible rumours she heard about him and that though wouldn't surprise her if true but she still couldn't base her judgement on, she had still plenty to see right in front of her eyes those last weeks.</p>
<p>He was very forceful with most of the females on set, other would say he clearly was harassing them.</p>
<p>
  <em>And if rumours are true…</em>
</p>
<p>No, that was a line Kyoko refused to cross. She had already judge someone just on assumptions and it had cost her dearly and nearly stretched to an end the friendship she had with Ren when nothing had been true. She was not about to repeat it. Ever. Not matter how bad the case sound or how likely it seems. Or even, on how much she hated the person in question.</p>
<p>That was she had told herself repeatedly until one week ago when she had witnessed it herself. Enough to make him go to jail if her knowledges in US rules on abuse were accurate. She had the good sense of taking a picture and was now determinate to act and was just waiting for the opportunity. She felt sick in her to have witness this. Felt sick for not being able to help, prevent it, something so that the haunted look the girl gave her before leaving would disappear from her eyes. She thought she might had at least cut the poor girl torture short by laughing falsely and talking about needing to enter the room they were so that she won't have been up for another round. But she would have nightmares about getting there sooner for a while.</p>
<p>
  <em>Poor poor girl</em>
</p>
<p>Still the issue persisted. The actress he just got fired was just some unimportant secondary character and wouldn't delay the movie but it wasn't an excuse. He had tried to flirt with her the second she was fired and even forcefully grabbed her and felt her up she try to leave. Compared to what she saw, it was nothing. Not enough to get rid of him.</p>
<p>She suspiciously watched him go to Moko-san and talk to her and kept an eye on them while pondering.</p>
<p>All in all, Kyoko was sure it would delay the movie even more it had already been.</p>
<p>She sighed. She really felt helpless.</p>
<p>
  <em>Moko-san had to feel such a pain with this movie…</em>
</p>
<p>She was torturing herself with a how to alleviate, even just a little the burden her friend had to endure when a loud arguing echoed on the set.</p>
<p>
  <em>Damn! I stopped looking.</em>
</p>
<p>And indeed, the argument was between Moko-san and the trash dude.</p>
<p>She approached them and her eyes jumped out of their saucers.</p>
<p>
  <em>What?! Oh no! You won't.</em>
</p>
<p>Suddenly the quarrel got louder enough and everyone was able to hear the remarks trash-man was throwing at Moko-san.</p>
<p>-I think I'm gonna take as an insult, you know. For a newbie actress like you who got her roles because of her looks, you could put a bit of an <em>effort</em> and not be trashy to the veterans-how do you say that in Japanese-ah yeah- to your sempai, don't you think?</p>
<p>-I didn't insult you. I just said I wasn't interested.</p>
<p>He started to speak even louder and Kyoko quickly made her way to her friend.</p>
<p>-For a population claiming to be very polite, to the verge of being stuck up, I'm feeling really offended by this sort of behaviour. After all, we hired you to represent this Japanese traditional spirit so if you don't have it how could you be of any use for us, right guys?</p>
<p>Though they didn't dare to tell to his face, Kyoko heard irritated and tired whispers directed at Cedric and <em>his </em>behaviour, some even wondering if they would any one left on the set at the end of it if they let him go rampage and throw away people on caprices.</p>
<p>She could only empathised with them, they were afraid to lose their jobs if they open their mouths, they knew the director was the one to pick and bring him for this movie. And he was really favoured in the industry. Most of the directors and producers would crawl in front of him and would always take his side.</p>
<p>Still, all of this gave her an idea.</p>
<p>She snatched Moko-san on the side while mister trash was parading and whispered urgently.</p>
<p>-How much do you care about this movie, Moko-san?</p>
<p>Her friend looked at her tiredly and pondered a second.</p>
<p>-A bit. It's still an open in the US field but-…</p>
<p>Kyoko waited patiently she developed.</p>
<p>Her friend frowned.</p>
<p>-A lot less than at the beginning. It's turning in such a headache. I'm not sure it's worth it anymore.</p>
<p>Kyoko nodded.</p>
<p>-Why?</p>
<p>Kyoko smiled.</p>
<p>-Because I've got an idea. And it could represent a risk for you so I had to ask you first.</p>
<p>Kanae arched a brow.</p>
<p>-Could you trust me on this?</p>
<p>Her friend briefly thought about it.</p>
<p>-Do as you please. It will be easier for you to explain than if I do it myself anyway.</p>
<p>-I'm going try to save your role, you know?</p>
<p>-I know Kanae smiled.</p>
<p>-Wait. You are not going to go up against him, right?</p>
<p>-I'm going to do exactly that Kyoko said with feral smile.</p>
<p>-You are crazy. You know what could happen in this setting?</p>
<p>-And? He can't get me fired; I'm not in the movie. I just didn't realize it before. I'm not even an official staff. I'm like a free electron. He has nothing to trap me.</p>
<p>Her friend's eyes grow exponentially.</p>
<p>-In other words Kyoko continued, I'm the only one free to do something without consequences for me. His influence is not big enough to impact my jobs in Japan so-</p>
<p>Kyoko shrugged her shoulders in conclusion but the next second she was blushing viciously. This move, it was <em>his. </em>His damn not well-mannered shrug he did in front of Bô and other times in front herself. He was totally rubbing off on her.</p>
<p>It wasn't a good rub off to get. Then why couldn't she help to be pleased with the idea of getting mannerisms from him.</p>
<p>Kyoko shook her head when her friend suddenly burst out laughing.</p>
<p>-You're right. Then go for it.</p>
<p>Giggling again Kanae said that Chiori would have loved this.</p>
<p>-She would even have brought pop-corn added Kyoko.</p>
<p>They laughed blissfully for a few moments.</p>
<p>When a commotion erupted they finally calmed and turned to the instigator of it. Cedric Bennet was rudely pointing at them with fury.</p>
<p>-See director, they don't even have the decency to apologize for their bad behaviours. I don't know how you picked them but obviously it was not a good choice, the actress even try to win a more important role by make advances on me.</p>
<p>The director listened to him quietly.</p>
<p>Her friend gasped in outrage to the blatant lie and Kyoko was sure she saw a perfidious smile crossed the face of the dude for a second.</p>
<p>-Seriously director, can we not fire them? Replace them with some decent actresses or something but these ones are no good.</p>
<p>Doubts and conflicts were disputing the face of the director and Kyoko chose to step in that little breach quickly before he made his mind.</p>
<p>-Excuse-me director but before you make a decision I would like to try to defend the case of the actress. It would only be fair to have both sides of the story don't you think Kyoko said approaching with predatory grace and false innocence to a shocked Cedric Bennet who evidently didn't thought much farther and didn't think anyone would speak up.</p>
<p>-We don't really have time for this argued Cedric. The movie already got delayed a lot and-</p>
<p>-You're right. The movie is already very late agreed Kyoko. That's why, excuse-me director if I'm presumptuous but Kanae Kotonami's role isn't some side character that could easily be replaced. It's an important character to the story and the movie being really behind schedule we don't really have the luxury of firing actresses on whims.</p>
<p>Some people chucked in the studio.</p>
<p> -So director, I, of course, don't want to be rude but before delaying your movie even more maybe you could check if the actress really deserve to be fired. I think t's very important to not make rash decisions in the stretched setting that the movie is already facing.</p>
<p>-You are just trying to defend your friend attempted Cedric.</p>
<p>A cold but firm glared was shot to him.</p>
<p>-Yes, she's my friend but that doesn't mean my point isn't valid. And while we are at it maybe what we should really look upon is your own behaviour Bennet-san.</p>
<p>-How dare you! What did I even do?! Director we should fire her for her arrogance. It would be less useless weight on the movie.</p>
<p>Kyoko smiled with satisfaction, ice in her pupils.</p>
<p>-Unfortunately for you Bennet-san. The director can't fire me as he never hired me. I'm even in the staff.</p>
<p>-You are Kanae's translator, you are obviously staff.</p>
<p>-No. I'm not. Unless you consider staff as people working for free. I'm her support, yes but I'm not winning anything material in the task.</p>
<p>Bennet trash-san turned to the director with barely controlled fury.</p>
<p>-Is it true?</p>
<p>-Yes. It is the director confirmed. I can't fire her. And unless I do dispose of Kanae Kotonami, it would like shooting in your own damn foot to make her expulse the studio he added when he saw Cedric ready to protest further.</p>
<p>Kyoko took a breath. Shaky. Anxiousness hidden behind her mask.</p>
<p>First point for her. In for the true fight.</p>
<p>-Again I apologize director but I think I'm going to use the excess of freedom I have at disposal.</p>
<p>Slightly amused the director nodded, understanding.</p>
<p>-You see director. Bennet-san right here emitted hurtful allegations about Kotonami-san on her behaviour toward him but he's only one complaining about her. And her version of the story is clearly the opposite, him making advances on her and her not responding positively which turned in aggressivity from him. And not the other way around. I clearly heard her say" I'm not interested". Now I can understand his frustration at being turned down, Mo-hum, Kotonami-san is a beauty indeed.</p>
<p>Bennet-san was ready to pounce her, she felt it and Kyoko was freaking out inside, his eyes promised violence and pain but she kept her cool outside. She was putting her best mature side out, mixing Natsu's sharp analyse skills and Setsu's cool and don't care attitude to put that front. Deep down though, Kyoko hope that one day she would be able to as mature and stand for her and her friends while staying herself.</p>
<p>-Now Bennet-san, director before concluding anything, I want you to know that my point right here is directed at something else than proving the obvious innocence of my friend. I won't blame Bennet-san to have lied to preserve his pride and if it was only that I wouldn't have said anything. I'm just a nobody. But there is a matter. There are serious issues.</p>
<p>She turned to the director.</p>
<p>-On your set, for this movie; there are far more serious issue in this studio director. Do you know that just a moment ago Kotonami-san herself told me she didn't care anymore about this movie if it wasn't for the fact it's an opportunity to work in America.</p>
<p>Kanae gasped in horror in the back with several others and Cedric smirked thinking they were done.</p>
<p>The director confused and slightly annoyed face looked at her intently.</p>
<p>-Now, don't get me wrong director, I'm sure she was and is still interested in the role and the plot of the movie. But in her words, it's beginning to be "not worth it anymore" director.</p>
<p>-And why is that, young lady, if can ask? Is she looking down on this movie, on America even?</p>
<p>Kyoko smiled sadly.</p>
<p>-No director. I can even say from being the first to have witnessed it that she was very excited to work in this movie. No director. Director, do you really don't know what's the issue? She's clearly not the only one you know.</p>
<p>-No I don't. I didn't know this movie was upsetting all of you so much.</p>
<p>-It's the movie director. It's the atmosphere. It's rotten. From what I grasped people are worried to get fired all the time and that's the only reason no one else spoke about it to you.</p>
<p>-I wouldn't fire them for reason protested the director, it's absurd.</p>
<p>-You did though. Or you let it happen. Five no with the last girl it makes it six Kyoko corrected herself. Six people were fired these last weeks. Since we came pretty much.</p>
<p>-It can't be that much.</p>
<p>-Yes it is. Every single time it was a girl. And every single time it happened because of one person.</p>
<p>Dread started to pool at the bottom of Cedric's stomach.</p>
<p>-My point wasn't to prove Kanae innocence but to point out the illness spreading on this set and cursing this movie even before its shoot.</p>
<p>The director's eyes frightened in the perspective of his condemned movie and wait heart to the lips to hear her talk.</p>
<p>She had bewitched her. Trap was set. Now she just had to make the realisation significant enough.</p>
<p>-It's a gangrene director. And this gangrene has a name.</p>
<p>Cedric took a few steps back, searching for an out.</p>
<p>-What name.</p>
<p>-Every time a girl director. Do you even know why they were fired or because they were side characters you didn't even bother checking why they disappeared? Every times because of whims director. Unavailable reasons. Every person afraid to be fired if they speak up or go against that person. I'm taking that risk because one I have nothing to lose, nothing to be afraid of, I have that chance in a way; and I asked permission to Kotonami-san first in the case she get fired because of me.</p>
<p>She continued:</p>
<p>Director, if you knew, I have witnessed things. I've been only here for a few weeks and of course I heard the rumours but I refused to believe it without proofs. But since last week I have them, I saw them with my own eyes. I've even got a picture.</p>
<p>The director command echoed in the studio.</p>
<p>-What name?</p>
<p>Then before she could answer; turning to the crowd with fury:</p>
<p>Is it true? Is there someone like that on my set? Martyrizing my actors and staff.</p>
<p>Silent answered his question. Shame for the males ones. Mostly pain for the females.</p>
<p>Another sad smile.</p>
<p>-Who? he shouted.</p>
<p>-The closest to you the hardest to see director Kyoko humbly whispered before answering his demand.</p>
<p>-Cedric.</p>
<p>The director paled and turned around with fury on a farther Cedric whose retreat just failed miserably. Some people caught him quickly.</p>
<p>Is it true? The director asked again to the cast. Did Cedric really is guilty of what this girl is accusing him of?</p>
<p>Slowly, with the certitude of truth being exposed and pressure reaching its peak, tongues started to untied and director's ears were suddenly submerged in so much atrocity he wanted to become deaf. The young man had been his friend. He was like a nephew to him.</p>
<p>Kyoko had to admit her plan could have backfired or at least would have needed lot more convincing until he saw the picture if the trash-idiot hadn't sold himself so quickly.</p>
<p>Director's hand flew in her direction.</p>
<p>-The picture he simply said with an aghast look.</p>
<p>-I'm sorry director.</p>
<p>-You won't show it to me?! he asked with fury.</p>
<p>-I will director. But right now, I still don't know if I can trust you and furthermore I want to respect the privacy of the victim, could we do that in your desk? Or a private room.</p>
<p>They went inside some side empty room followed closely by Kanae who was worried about the look that the man had when he looked at her friend.</p>
<p>  Kyoko showed him the picture and the director's face fade so much he looked like a ghost or about to past out. The only sign of life from him for a while was his raspy breath and his sweating.</p>
<p>Then he burst open the door and shouted.</p>
<p>-Cedric you are fired and I don't want to ever see you again close to one of my set, my family or anyone I know. Someone contact all the girls or people fired since the movie started, ask them if they want to take back their roles or works. Specify that Cedric won't be here anymore. Ah, also, ask them if they want to sue him and that we would help in any ways we can.</p>
<p>-You can't do that shouted Cedric while being forcefully escorted to the get out.</p>
<p>-I can and I will fiercely said the director.</p>
<p>-You!! Howled again Cedric. Kyoko Mogami! You will regret this, it's a promise! We are not done!</p>
<p>The director closed the door on the screams of Cedric.</p>
<p>-I'm afraid you just made yourself a sworn enemy.</p>
<p>Kyoko shrugged a bit, blushed then answered.</p>
<p>-I'm used to it.</p>
<p>The director impressed, looked at the petite girl with incandescent golden eyes. Then suddenly depressed he plopped down on an armchair in despair.</p>
<p>-though I'm very glad for you to have made me realized the truth and getting rid of such a dangerous person on my set, I'm afraid it will put another time lapse on the schedule and the movie. Maybe this movie is really cursed after all.</p>
<p>Pitying him a bit Kyoko apologized.</p>
<p>-I'm sorry director, I don't want to ruin your movie and I certainly hope it will go well but it seemed more important to me to protect the cast and let you know this.</p>
<p>-I know and you are absolutely right but with that I'm feeling short on lot of secondary characters and on the villain of the movie. I don't know if we can find someone in time.</p>
<p>Kyoko scratched her head. Now that the hardest was done, she was feeling out of her league. She didn't know this country enough to be able to help him. He was a famous director, he should have no problem finding other actors though.</p>
<p>-Hum, I don't know much about here but I still have the knowledge that you are an esteemed director that most people fight to work with. You shouldn't have any issue to find replacements, right?</p>
<p>The director heaved a breath.</p>
<p>-It's true but most people are too busy at this time to be able to add on their plate at any time and the only actors I think that could replace him are already overbooked or not interested in villain. It's they wouldn't want, it's just they won't have time and most of the ones who will came right away will be complete newbie or worse incompetents.</p>
<p>Kyoko felt a bit vexed, she knew she was a newbie too but not every newbie were incompetents. Some could do some things with just a bit of leading.</p>
<p>-Director, excuse me but you know I'm an actress newbie and I can assure you that not all new actors are incapable of acting just because they don't have much experience. Some can act and just need a chance.</p>
<p>-Are you suggesting I'll take you as the villain?</p>
<p>-Ah, no-no. That was not was I meant. Though I would to love to work one day for international productions and for example with you but no that was not what I meant. Besides, the villain is a male. Just to not look down on newbies directors.</p>
<p>-I feel like you are lecturing me the director smiled.</p>
<p>-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be presumptuous or anything like that.</p>
<p>-But you are right, the character villain is a male and it would be nearly impossible at this point to change something that important. Reshoot the scenes will delay the movie but change the characters itself would mean rewrite the all scenario, costumes and I don't know what else.</p>
<p>The director fell back in a ball of despair and Kyoko stood in front of him, helpless to say or do anything that could cheer him up. She didn't know any actors here, she really had not a clue how to salvage him from his depression.</p>
<p>Until-</p>
<p>-Director, I just got an idea.</p>
<p>The man looked up to watched at the positively bright smile of the girl, already feeling better from her smile alone. He grinned a bit unconsciously.</p>
<p>-What it is?</p>
<p>-I might have an idea about an actor.</p>
<p>Sceptical, he frowned.</p>
<p>-I'm not sure, miss. He would need to be very competent.</p>
<p>-Director, you will judge after you'll have seen some of his work.</p>
<p>He grudgingly nodded.</p>
<p>-I assure you, it's the perfect actor for you. Though I'm not sure he will accept.</p>
<p>Kyoko helped him browsed some of the work of the actor and soon the director raised sparkling excited eyes to her.</p>
<p>She lifted her phone in the air in interrogation and the man nodded.</p>
<p>She sent a message.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>PS: I hope you will like it. Reviews are appreciated. Damn, the word numbers keep growing, I have no control on this thing, it's maddening. Five thousands and two hundreds words. What the hell?!<br/>I wasn't expecting to have to raise the rating so soon, some have to start wondering if I know what I want but I felt like in a adults world and considering the mind-set of the dude, I didn't have much choice of I wanted to be realistic. Plus after this chapter, it's done, done. But well, unless everyone tell me it can stay rated T with what I wrote in this chapter, I think it was necessary. Oh well, at least I won't have to torture myself over it anymore.<br/>See you soon, hopefully. Kisses.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Two steps at a time: Let me pull you in</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.<br/>I hope you liked the precedent chapter. Here is the new one. A few more of that type and things should accelerate. Though a few could be very vague. I learned from the best after all. Nakamura-san is the ultimate sensei for aspiring writers in torturing readers. This manga shaped me all the way from teenager into adulthood. It altered and brightened my view of things and of the world. I could also never write a fast path story because of her.<br/>Let's just say, you have been warned.<br/>PS: Italic+ Quotation marks x2= mails in the past.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko was thinking she broke him staring at the "I" letter on the last message she received from him.</p><p>She had received an answer to her first message just a few days before the incident wishing her well and asking if they could keep communicate by mails all along which she quickly agreed to.</p><p>Then, just a few hours ago, to the one she had send about the role, he had thought she was joking, she had confirmed it was a serious proposition and was ready to explain the situation leading to it when he had just stopped replying all together.</p><p>…</p><p>Three hours before.</p><p> </p><p>Ren was going back to his flat at the end of an exhausting day when distinctive chip he had set in case of messages from Kyoko had pulled him out of his thoughts.</p><p>Reaching his flat, he had taken his phone and opened the mail.</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>"</em>
  </strong>
  <em> "Would you like to play the role of the main villain in Moko-san's movie?"</em>
</p><p>Ren had stayed stunned and puzzled before concluding she was surely joking.</p><p>
  <em>"Is the person playing is that bad?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You have no idea"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"And I'm not talking about his acting which is decent, no, it's humanly it's bad"</em>
</p><p>Now that was worrying him.</p><p>
  <em>"Be careful. You worry me. Keep your distance if you feel he's even just a bit threatening"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You worry all the time. But don't bother, he's fired. It's kind of my fault by the way."</em>
</p><p>What does she mean? She wouldn't ever do that.</p><p>
  <em>"why?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"He was worse than trash with everyone and especially women and he tried his dirty tricks on moko-san. In short."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Then you did good"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I suppose. Anyway, I was serious. As he was fired. The director needs someone quickly and have no one available at the moment."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Kyoko, stop joking"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I'm not. The director was desperate and I didn't know how to help but I kind of felt guilty because the movie was even more delayed because of my interventions. Then I thought about you, I'm sure you could do it.</em>
</p><p>Ren blushed a bit faced at her unbreakable confidence in his skills.</p><p>
  <em> As the director didn't know you I showed him a bit of your work and he was convinced. Sorry if it bother you, I hope I didn't step out of line with you and by doing, it's just I thought you could do it. Though I would completely understand if you don't want to or don't have the time to. But this is completely serious"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I" <strong>"</strong></em>
</p><p>He had stopped functioning after that. Thinking in circles for a while.</p><p><em>She is serious</em>.</p><p>This is serious. This an opportunity to work in States again under Ren name served on a silver plate by his dear Kyoko.</p><p>Why was he not surprised?</p><p>
  <em>She always saving me…Always giving me so much…</em>
</p><p>And without knowing it.</p><p>
  <em>Always.</em>
</p><p>Was he ready? He didn't know but did he want to take it? Absolutely.</p><p>But could he? He had work here, it would mean lot of managing from Yashiro-san and even then he wasn't sure it could be possible.</p><p>He had acquired a double passport, thanks to some strings pulled by the boss, he could now travel under the name and appearance of Ren. So that wasn't even an issue anymore.</p><p>But did he feel ready. Ren wasn't sure. No, he knew the answer. He wasn't. At least, he wasn't ready to make his big return, he had started to see another path than self-loathing. One that would lead to forgiveness and he was moving forward to it. But Ren knew he had still a long way to go. Most of the time, unconsciously, he would still fear to hurt someone one day and he still didn't think he had make amends enough to be allowed to relax, to feel joy. Even when he now knew he wouldn't be the same if he didn't go through all this, that he wouldn't have met her again. He still couldn't accept Rick's death as something inevitable. As something that had to happen. He just couldn't agree to that. His friend didn't deserve that.</p><p>He could understand his rash violent ways as a process of growing, something he needed to evolve. But nothing, nothing justified death.</p><p>And a death he still thought he caused and still had to make amends for.</p><p>But does this mean he couldn't do it?</p><p>It couldn't be his return, of that he was sure.</p><p>But maybe, maybe…</p><p>Maybe it could be another step.</p><p>A step forward. A little step. A shaky flawed step but still a step to his redemption.</p><p>A step he could still make.</p><p>
  <em>If I'm interested by the script anyway…</em>
</p><p>He called Lory and talked for a while. Then he called Yashiro-san.</p><p>…</p><p> </p><p>Back to present.</p><p>Kyoko was starting to worry and was contemplating calling him when her phone finally biped.</p><p>
  <em>"Send me a copy of the script please. Then I will make my decision"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Okay".</em>
</p><p>She asked the director the permission and saw Moko-san animatedly talking about something in English.  She was very proud of her friend, Moko-san had made lot of progress in the language. She honestly didn't really need her anymore. She was just a bit slower than the average American but that's was mostly that.</p><p>She sent the script to Ren as soon as she received the okay and impatiently wait for the reply.</p><p>It was quick to come. Only about half an hour had past when her phone biped again.</p><p>
  <em>"I'll take it. You can say it to the director."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Great!"</em>
</p><p>Director! Kyoko called out.</p><p>He turned around from the cameraman he was talking to at the other side of the set.</p><p>Kyoko shook her phone in front of her.</p><p>-He'll take it he replied she said loudly with an incredible smile plastered on the face.</p><p>-Really?! Asked the director excitably</p><p>-Yup Kyoko grinned wildly, eyes closed with joy and relief.</p><p>The director cheered and everyone laughed.</p><p>-We are saved. I'm preparing the contract right away.</p><p>He phone biped.</p><p>
  <em>"Kyoko?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yes?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You can tell him I will be there as soon as Yashiro-san manage to make room for it."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I will."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"And Kyoko?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Yes?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Thank you. For the opportunity."</em>
</p><p>Kyoko blushed, imagining his beautiful genuine smile on his face.</p><p>
  <em>"You're welcome"</em>
</p><p><em>"I hope to see you soon, then." </em>Added Kyoko.</p><p><em>"I'm your debt. I can't wait to see you again"</em> was his syrupy sweet reply.</p><p>Kyoko turned crimson in front of her phone. Speechless, she looked at it with glowing annoyed eyes in her reddening face.</p><p>
  <em>Damn sweet-talking man. Don't phrase it that way…idiotic fairy!</em>
</p><p>
  
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. ~Together in the world~ A sip of a whisper- part one-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Finishing of packing some stuff, Kyoko let her suitcase on the bed before getting out of her room and exiting the hotel. She was leaving in a two days. Lotus in the mud shooting was moving up and couldn't postpone her scenes any longer so she had to go back to Japan.</p><p>She hailed a taxi and got in.</p><p>And anyway, Kyoko couldn't say in all honesty that Moko-san still needed her. Even if she would have preferred it to be that way. She was going to miss her.</p><p>Kyoko stepped out of the taxi and entered the stretched structure ready to wait in the arrival area. She put herself near the entry against some wall to be sure to not bother anyone and tried to immerse herself in the reading of her script for Lotus in the mud but to no avail. She was giddy with nervousness and excitement.</p><p>
  <em>He should be show up any minute now…                   </em>
</p><p>His plane was already in the expected screen and one second later it did switched to landed.</p><p>Kyoko tried to calm and managed it, already planning how the meeting would go.</p><p>What she didn't plan though:</p><p> Was the overwhelming warm welcome in the form of a crushing but soothing embrace that squeezed her fiercely in strong arms just minutes after her pep-talk.</p><p>She squeaked and heard a deep chuckle from somewhere above her.</p><p> </p><p>…</p><p>When Ren had landed and saw her, focused in a script but waiting for him on the side, he had not been able to resist and had nearly run to her before pressing her hard against him in a bear-longing-hug.</p><p>Which resulted in a puzzled and virulent squeaked from the petite form in his arms and he chuckled.</p><p>He had missed her so much.</p><p><em>We nearly look like lovers meeting again after a separation</em> Ren thought bitter-sweet.</p><p>-Hi Kyoko he said before taking a step back to look at her.</p><p>…</p><p>-Hi Kyoko said the giant being that was Ren before letting her breath again.</p><p>She looked up to say hi and was faced with such an affectionate look she nearly melted on the spot.</p><p>-He-Hello she finally got out of her constricted moved throat, trying to get control of her raging feelings.</p><p>He looked at her with confusion.</p><p>-What? He asked.</p><p>
  <em>What? What?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Is it all he has to say…?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You just hug me, no nearly choked me in a hug like I was reason to live…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And in the middle of the airport, none the less…</em>
</p><p>She settled on that last part, already knowing he won't see the matter with being too gentle.</p><p>-We are in the middle of the airport.</p><p>-And?</p><p>Her jaw dropped.</p><p>-Someone could recognize you.</p><p>-No way. Not here in the States He said with confidence</p><p>
  <em>There are Japanese in States or just fans of yours. Forget that. What if someone that knew Kuon Hizuri identify you?! Damn clueless fairy.</em>
</p><p><em>-</em>Forget it Kyoko shrugged. The taxi is waiting.</p><p>Before stopping.</p><p>
  <em>I'm getting bad habits because of him. I have to stop doing that. Damn man. Damn me for copying it.</em>
</p><p>Ren grinned.</p><p>-Okay. I'll follow you.</p><p> </p><p>…</p><p>When they reached the studio, Ren was mostly assaulted with questions by the director and Kyoko step aside to let them work. She supposed the contract was signed because they didn't deferred a lot before starting to film again. Possibly because the shooting had already been postpone too much.</p><p>Kyoko watched him acted with renewed awe while he turned scenes after scenes in one take. He adapted so quickly to the character and to the atmosphere.</p><p>She was always blown away by the talent he could display in such short times. He understood right away what the director want but still managed to make the role his own and keeps it faithful to the view he has of the story and character.</p><p>In the movie, his character was the villain. But not at the beginning. He had turned to the worst because of some heart-breaking moments in his life. One of them, especially painful was similar to the experience of the hero. The death of all his family for the hero was like a mirror to the death of the brother and father of Ren's character. Because of that, the characters would related.</p><p>But what Ren hat to portray was that his character had been weak and had chosen the path of destruction but though the viewers should be able to see it was weakness, he had to also portray that his character was persuaded that it was the good choice to make. The choice of the strong because he dared to revolt against the fate that was put upon him. You had to see his doubts all the way in his evolution to the villain. And you had also to see that though he turned evil, though he chose this way, even after all that, he was not completely insensitive, he still cared, all the time but had chosen his fate.</p><p>It was a complex character but Ren was able to act it beyond expectations. Even in the few scenes she was watching, she could already see it would be a success. It was in his eyes and on the face's expressions that you were pulled in the most. Every time Ren's character should be hesitating or care, Ren's eyes would be saddening and glazing over, his face would constricted while observing what he would have just done, already regretting it. Avenge himself on a family but finally saving the child which was total improvisation, etc…</p><p>All the intensity of the play could be contain in his face and in his tensed shoulders, the intensity was choking the very air in the studio and Kyoko couldn't detach her eyes from him. No one could.</p><p>Ren was shouting a scene where he had to act like he was asleep, knock after a naughty night with an unknown woman which was in fact on the side of the hero and would communicate details on Ren's character to him by a call while she thought he would be asleep. The scene was of Ren's character leaving the bed after the deed and sitting on a comfy armchair with his now famous conflicted look and getting himself a drink before closing his eyes. The viewers and the woman getting off of bed will all supposed he had fallen asleep but at the last second he would have to show he was awake. For that the director had given him free hand on it.</p><p>The shot was of him abandoning himself to sleep at this very moment and Kyoko felt herself get distract. From down to up and reverse, again and again, her eyes wandered. Mesmerized by the view she didn't even realized when she surrendered to her eyes' desire to look and studied every inch of him. From his tremendously vast and sexy bare feet to which long but cutie toes were attached, along his interminable and muscular legs encased in black leather pants wide opened and bent while he sit ending on-</p><p>She gasped at that.</p><p>His pants were slightly opened and his button was unfastened and she couldn't help to bit her lip a little in hope to see more.</p><p>Her eyes went further. Raking his huge well-defined naked chest before going back to his alluring narrow hips that started a very attractive pelvic v going down to the unknown. So well-shaped it was creating big crooks dimples on each side of it. Kyoko fantasized on ticking them for a second. Even though, she was at the other side of the room.</p><p> She went up again. And up until she finally reached the top of his chest to his collarbone, prominently apparent with his neck fallen backward. She stroke his broad wild shoulders with her eyes imagining it was her hands palping those sculptural poetical muscles, this kind but overwhelming strength contained in those. She followed his endless arms to such sensuous large hands. Studying his suggestive lengthy strong fingers, joint after joint, she briefly wondered how such a power could be constrained, no matter his control and that deep down he could so gentle.</p><p>Kyoko was observing his beautiful lashes when his eyes suddenly opened which marked the switch to the next scene and Kyoko broke from her reverie and admonished herself strongly, absolutely shocked by her behaviour.</p><p>
  <em>What the hell was I doing?!! </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I was practically drooling from here over him!!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But he was…And-…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>God I need some air and quickly!</em>
</p><p>Other thoughts came back and she shook her head with shame.</p><p>
  <em>Bad naughty girl! Get a grip!</em>
</p><p>A sudden evil caustic but broken laugh interrupted her thoughts and she looked back at the scene to see to the bitterness turn into folly on Ren's face and the director shouted cut.</p><p>The scenes of the day ended and as expected soon all the girls and women of the studio were promptly flocking to him in glee and amazement, flirting bashfully with him.</p><p>Kyoko hastily decided she needed fresh air, for more than one reason and got out of the studio right away. She followed the wooden boards footpath connecting the shooting location to the hotel she was residing in and walk along the beach and farther the ocean that she could discern away.</p><p>Enjoying the sea breeze and captivated by the far sound of the waves, she took her time nicely. She eventually neared the hotel and spot the outside nightclub attached to the hotel and she briefly regret to not be of age yet.</p><p>She was passing past it when a dreadful presence made its apparition: Cedric Bennet.</p><p>He looked at bit drunk or so she thought as he was very slightly wobbling. Anyway he was out of it when he made his way to her.</p><p>She turned to him with interrogation, puzzled by the accost but feigned indifference.</p><p>-Yes? What's the matter Bennet-san?</p><p>He scowled sinisterly at her and approached her, closing the distance step by step until he was only an inch from her, invading her vital space with cold creeping ease and unease crawled its way inside her.</p><p>-You bitch! That's the matter. I don't know what I did to you or even how you managed to get me fired but-</p><p>-It's your own actions who got you fired Bennet-san, not me. I just put those actions in broad sunlight, that's all Kyoko said with renew rage, though she was not really assured by the way he looked at her.</p><p>He smiled with new calm and an ominous feeling began to emit from his stature.</p><p>-Maybe it's true he said with nonchalance but you still put an end to my fun so I think it's normal I feel entitled to be upset and want revenge.</p><p>She took a step back, slowly.</p><p>-You are a rapist, Bennet-san. The one who should seek revenge are your victims. Now if you would excuse me, Bennet-san I have things to-</p><p>-Oh no sneaky slut, you are not going anywhere he said and she felt herself being yanked to him when he violently grabbed her and teared her collar in the process before lifting her from the ground.</p><p>An empowered vicious smirk made its way on his livid enraged and he attached his body to her promptly and an idea seemed to form in his head.</p><p>Her members started to shake and fear was beginning to cage her in its new presence when she felt who much his body was thrilled with this situation. Indulged in full sexual excitement as it was.</p><p>He reeked of alcohol and his gross limbs were pressed to Kyoko's body and she felt herself getting sick in the idea of touching even the last little bit of it with any part of her body.</p><p>-You angered me little girl and for that you will have to pay. And as you are a slut, I have the prefect punishment for you. I'm gonna have a little fun with you. Though I don't think it will be pleasant for you as I don't intend to be very gentle. But eh, it's a revenge so it's pretty normal, neh. So the harsher the merrier.</p><p>The acrid sarcasm was so blatant Kyoko wanted to puke in through the lies but something very alarming suddenly attracted her attention.</p><p>He was rubbing the low mushy-spongy-hard part of him against her and abruptly adrenaline kicked in her.</p><p>She knew what he was planning, she couldn't, no, wouldn't lay like that without doing anything.</p><p>
  <em>I have to fight.</em>
</p><p>Kyoko begin to struggle in his grasp, kicking him in the legs with her feet, with her knees in the stomach, frantically searching for an opening but he was strong.</p><p>Then she thought he was loosening his grip on her collar when he let go of it for a second but it was just so he would better trapped her throat in his hand and he start to clench around. He was constricting it so much, choking her that only a thin trickle of air was still going through and it would reach the non-existence soon. She was suffocating and the pain on her neck was becoming more and more brutal.</p><p>She was forced on a wall the next instant, her resistance weakening with seconds ticking by.</p><p>Tick. Tick.</p><p> Black dots were appearing in her vision.</p><p>Tick. Tick.</p><p>A strong pain at her chest broke her fogginess though and she looked down. He was squeezing, no, mushing her right breast with his sticky alcohol hand.</p><p>Kyoko fought again to regain freedom. She even bit him but he tightened his grasp again and soon her moment of clarity was evaporating in deep void.</p><p>Tick.Tick.</p><p>She faintly heard the noise of a belt being unfastened then-</p><p>…</p><p> </p><p>Ren had left the studio as soon as he had managed to escape the clingy women and had been looking for Kyoko for a while now when he had reached the hotel.</p><p>What Ren then saw, something he rather never wanted to saw in this life or in the next ones, had made his blood boiled so much that the next moments were slightly blurred. A man had pushed against a wall his kyoko, was molesting her and belt undone was ready to an eventuality that he just refused to imagine if he wanted to keep his sanity right now.</p><p>Worse of all, she was barely conscious, suffocating for air as she was by his hand that was strangling her.</p><p>He leaped. He just leaped to them and pounced on him beating the guy out of her and knocking him half out in one strike.</p><p>He was ready for another round when he heard choking and unending coughing from the side.</p><p>Immediately he was with her. Holding her for dear life.</p><p>-Kyoko, Kyoko… Kyoko do you hear me? Are you okay? Where are you hurt? What can I do?</p><p>A rasping breath answered him and he looked at her. She was shocked and grasping for air but he couldn't determine if there were any more damages done.</p><p>She coughed some more then finally said a quiet but grateful relieved voice.</p><p>-Thank you. I'm okay.</p><p>All of sudden, the guy on the ground stood, he raised up high and straight to his full height and looked at Ren with annoyance.</p><p>-Who the hell are you, dude? And why don't you mind your own business?</p><p>Ren's eyes blared with rage and he didn't even bother looking at the guy while speaking.</p><p>-I'm her friend. And you should really leave before I lose my calm. Because right now, it's all that prevent me from making a blood puddle out of you.</p><p>The guy snorted.</p><p>-If you think I'm going to leave just like that, fool, you are making a big mistake. I'm going to teach this bitch a lesson for messing with me and it's not you who's going to stop me from that. I'm going to fuck her. Better even, rape her and if you're trying to stop me I will reduce you to a pulp.</p><p>Pure unadulterated rage raised inside of Ren to the mere idea of what he was menacing to do to his innocent Kyoko and he took a decision.</p><p>-Kyoko he said while looking for her eyes, can you wait for me a minute, I'm going to settle this then I will take care of you, okay?</p><p>Fear showed in her eyes and he reassured.</p><p>-Don't worry I will be okay.</p><p>The guy closed in and he avoided a punch before striking one that sent him against the wall. Ren thought about calling the police for a second but decide against it and this time was ready to honour his dark promises and beat him down, definitively if needed.</p><p>But then-</p><p>-Don't.</p><p>Kyoko's voice. He turned around. Kyoko had lifted herself against the wall and was slowly making her way to him, trembling tremendously.</p><p>He closed his eyes. He didn't want to scare her but this man had hurt her and nearly did so far worse. He couldn't let it go. The man deserved to pay. The madness inside of him would not let him get away from this. Just knowing he had hurt her made him want to hurt him so much more, to break to the core, until he has no more face to look at, no more hands to hurt innocent people, no more balls to abuse women. Oh, he was going to start with that, alright.</p><p>
  <em>If I had just came a few minutes later…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>God…</em>
</p><p>She reached him at the instant the guy was pulling himself up again.</p><p>-Just a few minutes and I-</p><p>-No. Don't she said again.</p><p>-Kyoko, he's not going to stop.</p><p>-I know but still, don't.</p><p>-Don't tell me you're defending him? Ren asked aghast with the perspective.</p><p>She grimaced with disgust.</p><p> -I'm not, believe me. But he's not worth it. Just call the police.</p><p>-Yeah dude, call the police. As if they can do anything against me, I will be out in the next hour and I will rake the place for this little slut.</p><p>Ren glared at him with outraged ire , his dark self creeping up inside of him, begging him to take action, to end his life for having hurt the one he loved. He took a step forward.</p><p>The voice as harsh as paper glass and the glaze murderous, he studied the guy coming to him with cold scrutiny and chilling ghost-like words wrapped in peaceful wrath echoed to the ears of the guy who looked at him with paler and paler complexion:</p><p>-You won't ever touch her again, I'm going to make sure of that.</p><p>-Who are you? He demanded in a shaking whisper and studied him with growing horror and anger.</p><p>He heard Kyoko take a precipitated breath before she said.</p><p>-He's the guy who was fired because of me.</p><p>Ren still frowned though shocked at the news.</p><p>-If you think it excuse what he did then-</p><p>-No. It doesn't. That's why I went out of my way and risked Moko-san getting fired because of me.</p><p>Ren looked at her, not understanding what she meant.</p><p>-I'm not the first one. He got fired because I was able to prove he abused several women, that's why I took the risks and that's why he's so furious. He already ra-…</p><p>She sighed and started again.</p><p>-He raped countless women already. And none of them were lucky enough to have a knight to save them she said with a smile directed at him.</p><p>Ren's eyes grew in horror and looked back at this scum of the human kind. Emotions twirling between sickness and anger.</p><p>-All the more reasons he said in a dark voice, not really looking at Kyoko and moving very silently forward cloaking himself in his past demons and in his murderous wishes for the guy.</p><p>-No Kyoko repeated with a desperate voice.</p><p>Startled by the despair in her voice and pulled out of his wrath, he just through the guy twirling around rather than hitting him and said to Kyoko.</p><p>-Kyoko, I'm not going to kill him. But if he's really able to pull himself out of anything legal, I need at least make him incapable of doing harm.</p><p>-And is this justifies what you are going to do? She asked</p><p>-No but-</p><p>-I really wouldn't have thought that you would defend me little slut, I'm flattered the guy said before coming back at Ren. Still it doesn't change a thing, I have something to confirm you see so now I'm going to fight no matter what until I figured it out.</p><p>Kyoko looked at him with terrific madness and behind growing fear.</p><p>-I'm not doing it for you, trash of a man.</p><p>Ren looked at her completely confused.</p><p>-What are you talking about Kyoko?</p><p>He saw her looked wildly around before she walked to a lamp post and stood there immobile. Then she made a sign for him to come near her and still confused but curious, he just obeyed. At the light of the lamp, he could the big purple circle around her neck of what seems to be a painful bruise. His rage remembered he turned to the direction of the guy ready to strangle him just he did to her but all of sudden Kyoko fiercely took his hand in her one.</p><p>-We are going to call the police, Ren.</p><p>-Kyoko-</p><p>He tried to make her let go but she was damn strong for such a petite woman.</p><p>-We are going to call the police but first let him come to you, knock him out once he reaches us. Just knock him out Ren. You can't fight him, can't scare him. With what happen today and with the proofs I had from the other girls, I guarantee you, he won't be able to get out of it, there are too much evidences Kyoko whispered hastily.</p><p>-He still hurt you and-</p><p>-Do you really want to dirty your reputation for such a scum?</p><p>He sighed knowing she was in the right.</p><p>-Ren. Please. He's not worth it.</p><p>He looked at her pleading eyes and tone. Defeated, he grumblingly agreed. If she knew what a weapon those eyes were to him, it would his end.</p><p>On the side the guy was looking for the best angle of attack now that he knew that Ren was a good fighter. He was observing Ren quietly, studying him, taking step after step toward them.</p><p>Eventually he was on the limit of what the post lamp was lightening around and Kyoko was watching him anxiously and squeezed his hand tightly. Ren thought she was worried he would come close to her again.</p><p>
  <em>He won't. Even if I have to go to jail, he won't touch a hair from her!</em>
</p><p>He stepped into the light and Ren gasped in shock loudly when he saw his face.</p><p>Memories from another time came back to him and wormed their way with old bitterness, unfairness, suppressed feelings and hate, so much hate, so much anger.</p><p>
  <em>Cedric Bennet.</em>
</p><p>The boy who bullied him from most of his childhood into show-business</p><p>The spoiled brat who made him fired several times when he couldn't say anything, when he wouldn't say anything.</p><p>The teenager who beat the crap out of him countless times without he ever defended himself, until he broke apart and that madness got control over his body and his mind; until he started to fight back with folly. Dark to the core, no more place for mercy or kindness. Just blood and fists against fists, rage, mad fun, oblivion.</p><p>Until he provoked his best-friend death.</p><p>And now;</p><p>Now, the man who became a rapist, the guy who hurt Kyoko, that nearly raped her, nearly strangled her, nearly choked her.</p><p>Bloody-dark seeped into his eyes while images after images of memories, of nightmares, of nearly events haunted him with strike accuracy, tempting him with the morbid possibilities, with the morbid happenings. Hate he already felt, anger too, despair was even more familiar to him. Fear not so often. But what he was feeling right now, this absolute furore made of fear for his dear one, from what could have happened, from what did happened, hurts from her pain, bitter and despair from the past, rage from everything; it constructed such a ball of insane feelings, such a maelstrom of angers and negatives feelings he just saw white. His vision reduced to one point, one person.</p><p>He was on the edge, ready to blow up and tear that person to pieces, to become a monster again.</p><p>But at that very moment, a warm ferocious squeeze brought him back in the world of the livings, his unseeing glaze met golden anxious eyes looking for something in his ones before shifting to determined ones.</p><p>-No she said with stubborn despair. No. You won't give up on you, on your humanity. Not for a trash like him.</p><p>He blinked. Reminiscences of his madness clinging to him with vicious intensity.</p><p>-No she repeated with tears in her eyes. I won't let you. Don't convince yourself you're bad because of him. Don't convince your mind you have to be this way. Whatever the reason, your view of yourself is more important.</p><p>He blinked again and she took his face into her hands.</p><p>-Don't lose yourself to darkness because of him. You can choose the path to take. It's your choice. You hear me Ren? You don't need to stoop that low to be able to fight. You can stay yourself. You can fight in the light. You can choose light over darkness.</p><p>He blinked two more times looking at her utterly crying now.</p><p>-You are the light, you have just to choose it. Choose to believe you are. To believe in your worth. Please Ren… Pretty please!</p><p>Blinking for the very last time, he started to comfort her.</p><p>-What's the matter? Why are you crying?</p><p>Ren pet her hair, fondly looking at her and barely making attention to him, he hit Cedric on the side of the neck to quickly knock him out, realizing in after-thought he was calm again.</p><p>Kyoko stared at him dumbfounded then punched him vigorously.</p><p>-I was worried, idiot sempai. You blacked out.</p><p>
  <em>I did, indeed.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>How can I be so calmed  just seconds after?</em>
</p><p>Then he remembered her words.</p><p>
  <em>"You won't give up on you, on your humanity. Don't convince yourself you're bad, that you have to be this way. Don't lose yourself to darkness. You can choose the path…"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"You don't need to stoop that low to fight. You can choose light…You can fight in the light…"</em>
</p><p>
  <em> "You can stay yourself… You are the light, you just have to choose it…  To choose to believe… In your worth."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I won't let you."</em>
</p><p>Internally, he chuckled.</p><p>
  <em>How can you always say what I want to hear the most? How can you always reassured me on me even when I don't know myself how…Oh girl.</em>
</p><p>-Hai, hai. I'm okay. I promise. I'm going to call the police now, okay?</p><p>She nodded with a half glare and he chuckled aloud this time.</p><p>He turned to her after the call.</p><p>-Kyoko?</p><p>-Hum? she said nursing her neck discreetly and he frowned with worry.</p><p>
  <em>It must hurt a lot. Going to numb it a bit later.</em>
</p><p>Kyoko? He said again and she turned to him.</p><p>He looked at her and saw everything he had always wanted and more. His lids closed half-way absent-mindedly, emotions overwhelming him for a second as he was looking at her.</p><p>
  <em>You are an angel.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My angel.</em>
</p><p>She seemed to blush under his scrutiny and he looked at her even more fondly.</p><p>-Thank you Kyoko He breathed. Thank you. For your kind words.</p><p>She diverted her gaze but nodded with a relief smile.</p><p> </p><p>After a while he started again.</p><p>-Also, I think I might have an idea for your bruised neck.</p><p>Kyoko observed him with a confused look waiting for him to continue with an arched eyebrow.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So, it seems I'm subscribed to long chapters, hope you will like it still. But someone told me to just roll with it so here I' am doing just that. That being said:<br/>Rollercoaster emotion chapter, yeah it's me…fluff, suspense, violence, drama, angst, fluff again…who is with me for another round? Hahahaha…<br/>Because the rollercoaster is far from finished.<br/>I hope you will have fun reading it and will waiting for the next one impatiently.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. ~Together in the world~ A sip of a whisper-part two-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Nakamura Yoshiki does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They went into the hotel, Ren carrying on his shoulder the travel bag he had dropped when he had saw the situation Kyoko were in. The police had cuffed and took away Cedric though Ren was still shocked to have met one of his former nemesis from the past today. But Kyoko's words were circling around in his mind, cloaking him in a fuzzy warm safety net that was preventing him from really thinking about anything else but her kindness and the need to care for her state.</p><p>Once in the hotel, he dropped his bag into his room and went with Kyoko to the hotel's bar under her suspicious but perplexed eyes.</p><p>
  <em>What are we going to do here…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You're not up to drinking again, are you?</em>
</p><p>Her eyes were screaming it so loud he had to turn away with a smile.</p><p>…</p><p>Kyoko were suspicious when they entered the bar but Ren reassured with a smile.</p><p>-Don't worry. I'm going to get alcohol for another reason, though I could really use a drink right now and might get one but I won't abuse. Plus, should I remind you it was mostly because I was drugged all that happened and not because I had drunk too much he said with a smug air.</p><p>She vaguely heard him say something about old demons being awakened and admitted she might be compliant on this point seeing the situation.</p><p>-True but you still watch over your consumption.</p><p>-I've never been as out as on that incident with you of my life, I have a pretty good perceptions of limits usually. Plus, if I was to be drunk again, you can still carry me again, can you not? That man said with a cheeky smile.</p><p>
  <em>That man!</em>
</p><p>-I might just decide to drop you into nature with other animals; you could find some comrades of you into the wild.</p><p>He narrowed his eyes at her.</p><p>-Comrades of me?</p><p>Kyoko smirked and pointed at him.</p><p>-Raccoons. Like you.</p><p>He scoffed and grumbled before turning around.</p><p>-But I should put back your mask first or they wouldn't recognize you.</p><p>He looked at her with a glare though the light hue on his cheeks was giving him away and she exploded in laughs.</p><p>He strike back to her at full speed and promised with a nefarious smile:</p><p>-First opportunity I get, I'll steal your make up pouch or better even get my own one to-</p><p>-Great idea! I will have all the tools to disguise you into your fate animal if you're too out again Kyoko interrupted with rapt, giggles coming through her teeth despite her best efforts. Don't forget the dark blue set, it's a must. I didn't have everything and had to improvise at the time.</p><p>Ren's face though paler turned even more scheming.</p><p>-I will have my own so that when the time comes I can transform you into some wild animal too.</p><p>Kyoko snorted.</p><p>-It won't suit me. No everyone can pull the raccoon style bursting with laughs at last.</p><p>-I never said it would a raccoon, Kyoko he said with a grin full of teeth. You're teasing me a bit too much so a fox maybe? Nah, too big.</p><p>Kyoko stepped back sensing the teasing had switched side but Ren followed.</p><p>-You are so so tiny he said while closing his forefinger near his thumb in example. So Tiny. Hmm, he pondered. A big animal wouldn't suit you.</p><p>-A fox isn't that small.</p><p>-Still, if I had to go in fairy tales' style he said with a curious but a knowing spark suddenly in the eyes, I would compare you to Thumbelina.</p><p>-I'm not that small! Kyoko huffed going back to earth when she had been ready to go into La-La-land. You're the giant. No, better, in fairy tales style, you would be the magical green bean.</p><p>-The what? The green bean?</p><p>-Yeah Kyoko said still vexed. The magical bean from Jack and the magical bean.</p><p>She saw Ren thinking, trying to understand what she was talking about until the coin fell and he exploded.</p><p>-The plant?! The magical plant going to the sky?! Are you seriously comparing me to a magical bean??!</p><p>
  <em>It's still better that a plain corn. As a fairy, your very name is a vegetable. A magical bean is a serious advancement in the rank of plant.</em>
</p><p>Biting her  bottom lip furiously Kyoko looked at Ren all upset and huffing around while thinking about being a bean while she was thinking about him being a corn and arguing for idiotic comparisons on fairy tales and all of sudden she couldn't stand it.</p><p>She bent over in odd whirling bounds of giggles, tears coming to her eyes and holding her stomach as her best chance in staying on her feet and not ending up on the ground, so much so she didn't even hear she wasn't the only one laughing with unceremonious abandon.</p><p>When she was able to lift herself a bit from her inclined position, she tilted her head a bit and saw Ren doubled over and clutching one his side with as much mirth on the face and in the eyes as on her.</p><p>Painful sides and big grins later they looked at each other and Ren messed his hair with what curiously looked like baffled but happy embarrassment.</p><p>
  <em>He must not be used to lose his calm like that and laugh without a care…</em>
</p><p>She chortled on the side.</p><p>
  <em>It's so cute.</em>
</p><p>-We were being really silly, right? He asked after a last calming breath.</p><p>-Yup. It was fun though. So mister raccoon, in what, grumble, animal would you change me? If you had the occasion of course.</p><p>-I will. I don't know when but I will. And to answer your question, I actually knew from the beginning but you deserved some teasing after all the one you gave me.</p><p>Kyoko huffed a bit but arched a brow awaiting his reply.</p><p>He grinned wickedly but didn't talk.</p><p>-So?</p><p>Right then the expression on Ren's face turned infinitely gentle and Kyoko started to blush in advance.</p><p>-A squirrel. A cute adorable squirrel.</p><p>She turned her face on the side to hide her melting expression.</p><p>-I didn't know you had a thing for squirrels.</p><p>Ren's eyes widened a bit but he only missed a bit before answering with a dangerously sultry tone.</p><p>-You have no idea.</p><p>Kyoko wiggled a bit under his gaze then finally asked.</p><p>-So, when are you going to tell me what are we doing here?</p><p>He seemed to deflect a bit before replying.</p><p>-Right. Give me second. I'm going to command a drink and ask for it.</p><p>Kyoko was waiting for him in a booth when he came with two drinks.</p><p>She looked at him pointedly.</p><p>-It's not for you to drink; it's for your neck. Come here.</p><p>He said while sitting down and pointing to between his knees.</p><p>-Sit between my legs for a bit, it's will be easier to attend to your neck like that.</p><p>Kyoko observed him with growing worry and confusion.</p><p>
  <em>He didn't have a drink yet, right?</em>
</p><p>-I'm pretty sure necks can't absorb alcohol Ren.</p><p>-It's not to absorb silly, it's for your bruise. Strong alcohol can numb faster than anything. Believe me, I know it from experience. You can put a cream to help it to disappear later but this, he said while raising the drink to show her is a very strong whisky, one I wouldn't even drink like that unless it's cut with water; most bars have some in their reserves for picky or demanding clients. It will not help with the colour but it will greatly relieve your pain.</p><p>-I see.</p><p>She didn't know alcohol could be used like that and Kyoko had worked at an inn. She knew it could used to disinfect an open wound if it wasn't too deep but not it could ease the pain on bruises. She also wondered from what experiences he had acquired those knowledges.</p><p>
  <em>Not good ones, I'm sure of it.</em>
</p><p>She proceeded without a word and sat on the couch between his knees.</p><p>She saw him put some tore cloth in the lighter coloured drink, squeezed it a bit then he begin to apply carefully the damp thing on the side of her neck. With meticulous care and very delicate pats, he did the same to all the side of her neck and indeed after a bit, the area began to numb and pain retreated little by little.</p><p> At that time though she saw his face darkening again while he was looking for a missed spot Kyoko pushed his hand away.</p><p>-Thank you. The pain is already a lot more bearable she told him while trying to hide her neck.</p><p>He frowned.</p><p>-Wait a minute. I'm trying to see if I missed a place.</p><p>-You didn't and anyway you are staring at it so gloomily I preferred it that way.</p><p>Ren sighed and finally pick up the other drink before gulping it in one sip. He looked pained and preoccupied and very sombre.</p><p>-Sorry. I didn't want to make you uncomfortable. But someone hurt you, badly. And if I had come just a few mi-</p><p>-But you didn't Kyoko interrupted him abruptly. And even if you hadn't, Ren, it wouldn't have been your fault.</p><p>-Of course, it would have.</p><p>Kyoko stared at him severely but without a word until he turned his eyes her way to redirected them the second after in front of her hard expression.</p><p>-No, it wouldn't. Sink that in your stubborn mind. Whatever could have happened to me tonight if you hadn't come wouldn't have been in ANY ways your fault. Ever.</p><p>Right there, just now, she saw it. For a second. In his eyes. Pain. And a huge constricted amount of it. But also some gigantic guilt hidden behind.</p><p>But then.</p><p>He closed his eyes.</p><p>-Sorry. Really but-…Could you maybe…Give me some time alone, would you? It's not against you at all but I need some time…</p><p>
  <em>Some time?</em>
</p><p>When she didn't answer he continued:</p><p>-To calm down. Tonight…Arghhh…</p><p>He looked like he was struggling with his words, struggling with what to say.</p><p>-Tonight brought back bad memories in the present and the fact you were nearly-…I just need some time.</p><p>
  <em>What a rollercoaster. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>And he was laughing just moments ago.</em>
</p><p>But from what she had grasped since she had had glimpses of his issues while working with him, his past was haunting him. A very dangerous, sad past.</p><p>
  <em>Or at least it looks like that…</em>
</p><p>Then, she couldn't blame him for wanting a bit of time for him after what happened, even more knowing the guy he met was Cedric and that this guy had apparently gave him such a hard time when he was younger.</p><p>She couldn't blame him either to shut her out. She was supposed to not know a thing about this and it was very personal. There was no reason whatsoever to tell her about it.</p><p>Still, Kyoko couldn't refrain from feeling a bit hurt for being shut out by him. Even if she knew she was the last person he would like to confide about it, even if she now knew he was her childhood friend, she was sure he wouldn't confide to her. He was already not the type to confide in anyone so why would he even more do it if it was her.</p><p>-Okay she said.</p><p>His shoulders slumped and for a second he seemed lonely before smiling weakly at her.</p><p>-Just go rest and call me if you need anything or if your neck hurt.</p><p>-Don't worry. It will be okay, I'm better because of your trick. I'm just going to sleep.</p><p>He nodded.</p><p>-Then all good. We'll see each other tomorrow.</p><p>Kyoko agreed and left quietly.</p><p>But on her way out she turned around to look at him and felt like she was abandoning him when he needed her the most.</p><p>
  <em>He looked so pained…</em>
</p><p>But she couldn't go against his will and so she eventually left for her room.</p><p>…</p><p> </p><p>It had been an hour or so and Kyoko was finishing readying herself to bed.</p><p>She took a shower. Her teeth were brushed. She had drunk some water. Put some cream on her neck. Took painkillers for some other sore spots.</p><p>She was even in her pyjamas. Some baggy old too large one.</p><p>Still, she couldn't sleep. No matter how sleepy she was, she running in circles in her room, too restless to even put herself in the bed.</p><p>At the end, tired of playing animal in cage, she went out on the balcony hoping that the sea breeze and the view of the ocean would sooth her a bit.</p><p>But, fate must have decided otherwise because, nonetheless the outside was managing to relax her, the only thing that she could focused on was the characteristic lengthy form near the ocean on the sand, glooming all alone; with the proximity of the hotel Kyoko could even slightly detect he had his head in his hands.</p><p>
  <em>Screw sleep.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Screw space. Screw pyjamas.</em>
</p><p>She was going and she was going right now.</p><p>Her bare feet begin to walk then run and she rushed outside to another step of destiny.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>ENJOY!	<br/>Next is coming.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. ~Together in the world~ A sip of a whisper-part three-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat. Nakamura Yoshiki does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Kyoko barged outside, she covered the few meters that separate the hotel from the beach and run back through the woods-boards path until she landed on the sand and started to frenetically look for the spot where she had saw him.</p><p>Left and right. Left and right. And then-</p><p>
  <em>There!               </em>
</p><p>At a few inches of the melodious ripples of dying waves coming and going in a slumbering dancing round under the wavering moonlight granting everything with a mesmerising light silver halation the tide is licking, taunting long toes. </p><p>On the crystal-white chilly sand she can see as she approach progressively an extended body barely lightened by the halo of the moon.</p><p>Thus, she quickly perceived his long limbs sprawled on each sides of him. Beside one.</p><p>His right forearm is hiding himself from the world, laid on his face and the tight appendage seemed strained significantly which his hand sealed on a painful fist at the end of it is a blatant proof.</p><p>Kyoko is a few meters distant of the figure.</p><p>She is ready to jump to him, she just has to make a few steps.</p><p>But she's hesitating.</p><p>She's not sure she is the right person to provide help. Or that he would want to.</p><p>
  <em>I might not be the person he would accept to confide in…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Or maybe he just doesn't want to talk about it…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko was afraid to burden him rather than help him, she didn't want him to feel oblige to talk to her when it was clearly sensitive subject.</p><p>
  <em>I'm intruding on his personal time and issues I won't understand…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>What if I hurt him by poking my nose where it doesn't belong…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It's the last think I wish for…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But-…</em>
</p><p>Still she could not do nothing. She couldn't stay like that and watch him be in such a distress and leave.</p><p>She just couldn't do it.</p><p>
  <em>I know I'm not the right person…I know he would need someone else…I know I'm going to cross limits…Yes I know…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But I can't …If I can be of the least tiny bit of help…I want to there for him…Even if he won't ever need me or feel the same way…I just can't stand seeing him like that…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I need to go!</em>
</p><p>She made the last steps and reached the lay out figure, hesitation gone.</p><p>Kyoko studied him for a while then sat quietly on the cold sand and watch the waves moving, the power of mother-nature at work. Distracting her by the art piece of life displayed to her. She really loved the ocean, it was enchanting and captivating to observe.</p><p>Minutes ticked by and she could hear him breathing heavily but nothing else. Seeing he didn't seem to have noticed her presence she eventually made some noises on purpose.</p><p>He didn't react or showed any sign he had heard her so she turned to his stretched out form.</p><p>-Ren? She whispered quietly</p><p>Still no answer.</p><p>-Ren, are you okay?</p><p>She heard him grumble a bit and moved closer. Then she put her hand on his forehead, feeling up for any fever.</p><p>At the instant she touched he started to straightening up in a sit-up position and Kyoko could finally see with his face visible at last that he was in a far worse state than before. He had drunk some more at the least but he also seem even more morose and grim than before.</p><p>It's with a quite cold tone he replied:</p><p>- Didn't I say that I wanted to be left alone?</p><p>-I know. Sorry. But I saw you from my balcony and got worried. You don't seem so good, sempai.</p><p>He gritted his teeth visibly and Kyoko cringed. Eventually with the darkest eyes she had saw him in a long time he looked at her, not really seeing.</p><p>-Leave. I'm not…in a decent state of mind right now.</p><p>Kyoko wobbled a bit on her positions seeing his sinister face but maintained them ultimately.</p><p>
  <em>I'm not leaving.</em>
</p><p>-No.</p><p>He seemed to blink in surprise for a second but then his eyes turned colder again, all warm disappearing from them in an instant.</p><p>-Leave! I-…I don't want to see you Kyoko!</p><p>
  <em>Ouch. That one hurts. But I'm going to be like a mollusc to some rock…stuck to you!</em>
</p><p>-No.</p><p>-Get. The. Hell. Away! He said very slowly and heavily.</p><p>-Nop she said again.</p><p>- Fuck off! He growled harshly but a bit desperate.</p><p>-How scary but it's still a no.</p><p>And indeed he was scary right now but there was more important that her fear. Because he was just trying to scare her so she would leave. In other words, it was just an act.</p><p>-Please he said at last.</p><p>-No she said gently. I know I'm not the right person to be there for you. And I know you don't want to talk about it. I won't force you to say anything. But I won't leave alone. Not in that state. What are the friends for If not to be there in those sort of situations. And you said we were friends, right?</p><p>He hung his head in defeat and didn't say a word.</p><p>-Unless it was just polite talk? Which I would totally understand as I'm just a child.</p><p>She saw him opening his mouth as to say something before closing it.</p><p>-But even then I wouldn't leave.</p><p>-No. We are. We are friends he grumbled.</p><p>Unknowingly to him, she beamed, relieved.</p><p>-Great. Now, how much did you drink?</p><p>-A few drinks he begrudgingly replied.</p><p>-Precisely.</p><p>-Five…maybe.</p><p>
  <em>Not too much for his height but not that light either…</em>
</p><p><em>-</em>I see. Hmm…I suppose you don't feel ready to go back, right?</p><p>He nodded.</p><p>-That's why you should leave, I just-</p><p>-You can sit on it. I'm going nowhere.</p><p>He breathed out heavily.</p><p>-Fine he agreed.</p><p>
  <em>Not like I let him a choice anyway…</em>
</p><p>She sat back near him letting the waves tickle her toes too and for a while they quietly watched the ocean. The atmosphere nearly peaceful if not for the knowing reasons that brought them here.</p><p>-You are not going to ask anything? He finally questioned after a moment.</p><p>-You don't want me to.</p><p>He sighed. His hands were again framed into angry fists.</p><p>-Right.</p><p>His reply sound so stretched and tortured she couldn't help to add something.</p><p>-But I would gladly listen.</p><p>When a puzzled confused expression marred his face in answer to what she said, she decided to speak it more clearly.</p><p>-Hmmm…how to say this?</p><p>Kyoko didn't want to be too intrusive or forceful.</p><p>
  <em>He has to see it's just a proposition…</em>
</p><p>She turned to him and came even closer to him. Her heart was beating fast and she was blushing.</p><p>She shook herself trying to right her thoughts.</p><p>
  <em>Not the time…No the time…Now is about him…About helping him…</em>
</p><p>Delicately she took both his hands into hers until he relaxed his fists and she tightly hold his fingers into her hands.</p><p>He raised a foggy dark lost look at her with questions in his eyes.</p><p>-I won't ask questions you don't want me to ask but If you wanted…If you ever wanted, Ren, I would gladly listen to what's worrying you…I know I'm surely the last person you wish to confide in and the least adequate one…But if It can help…If listening can help…</p><p>Ren's eyes were looking at her with great astonishment, surprise was in them, wonder too and maybe she was imagining it but a bit more warm seemed to there as well. His eyes were never leaving her, following her every gests and to avoid getting to self-conscious she continued hastily.</p><p>-I know it might be presumptuous to propose something like that but-…I you were willing to confide in me, I promise I wouldn't judge you and even I wouldn't say a word to anyone about what you will have said.</p><p>He was fixing her with such an intensity she didn't know what to think or what he was thinking about it but when one thing she knew was that she was blushing.</p><p>-Of course, it's not an obligation. Just…A proposition. So that you know that if you ever feel the need to talk, well…My ears are free anytime. To listen. And just that She finished with more and more embarrassment.</p><p>
  <em>Maybe I shouldn't have said anything…It's not my business after all…Why is her starring at me like that...?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Stop starring at me!</em>
</p><p>For a while, he seemed to be frozen in some sort of stupor, looking at her without moving a lash, without nearly breathing.</p><p>Then, all of sudden he grasped at her desperate force and look at her straight in the eyes and Kyoko understood that all this time, he was probably pondering the pros and the cons and now must have reached a decision.</p><p>He hanged his head then quietly said:</p><p>-I'm not sure I would know how to.</p><p>Ignoring her growing blush, Kyoko move forward and sneaked herself on her knees between his bend legs and sat, never letting go of his hands. Knowing unconsciously that not breaking contact was important at this moment.</p><p>-Okay she said.</p><p>-It's not very appealing nor a fun story.</p><p>-Okay.</p><p>After a short time he asked with urgency in the voice:</p><p>-What if you don't like what you hear? You might hate or fear me after that.</p><p>Startled Kyoko blurted out:</p><p>-What? No way.</p><p>
  <em>Oups…It got out before I even noticed…How could I ever hate him after all…</em>
</p><p>He blinked with surprise and smiled weakly.</p><p>-How can you be so sure? What if I'm a monster? What if did monstrous things before?</p><p>Kyoko thought about it for a second.</p><p>-Hmm…But it doesn't change the person you are now, right. And from what I know this person is pretty good.</p><p>She saw him blush a bit at that but he also looks a bit more relaxed.</p><p>
  <em>Cute…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Argh…Focus… Focus.</em>
</p><p>It doesn't change what I might have did or have been he still concluded.</p><p>
  <em>Stubborn fairy…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko pondered a bit on that and finally came with an idea.</p><p>-I'm persuaded that whatever you will say won't change my view of you Kyoko finally declared but maybe I can convince you if I share some things too.</p><p>
  <em>He looks like a lost puppy now…hihi</em>
</p><p>-What do you mean by that? How would it helps?</p><p>-Because, I might have guessed a few things while with you during Heels' period work.</p><p>His face paled so much then Kyoko got worried she precipitated him on the other side, into Hereafter.</p><p>-Bad things I supposed he muttered darkly.</p><p>-Just things Kyoko corrected.</p><p>Worried, he looked at her and demand:</p><p>-What things?</p><p>-First, I might have guessed you were fighting against yourself and feeling guilty about something.</p><p>Ren nodded, seemingly relieved.</p><p>-What else? He anxiously demanded.</p><p>Kyoko scratched her face, infected with his anxiety.</p><p>-What else, Kyoko?</p><p>-I might have grasped she began,</p><p>-Yes?</p><p>-…That you were feeling guilty because of someone's death that might have died because of you she timidly replied.</p><p>He studied shell-shocked that she had guessed that much.</p><p>-You are still there he said bitterly.</p><p>Kyoko's smile was a pained one when she answered.</p><p>-Yes, I'am. I won't leave.</p><p>Kyoko could see even in his drunk-state he couldn't understand why. Why she was still there, why she wasn't afraid. But that didn't matter at the moment.</p><p>-So, are you going to tell me? She demanded.</p><p>He raised his eyes at her with wonder and she smiled reassuringly at him.</p><p>-Okay he murmured very softly but firmed.</p><p>She nodded without a word, bewitched by the atmosphere and his soft tone.</p><p>-I don't know where to begin he said after a while ruffing his hair with a hand. He looked very slightly intoxicated but it was barely noticeable.</p><p>
  <em>Maybe that's why he's more talkative…</em>
</p><p>-Why not with the beginning? She proposed quietly.</p><p>He chuckled warily and looked at her again with fear in his eyes.</p><p>-It's gonna take a while he opposed.</p><p>-I'm all ears. I have all the time in the world.</p><p>He grimaced.</p><p>Kyoko sensing he was still wary of her reaction put her hands on his shoulders.</p><p>-I'm not here to judge, Ren. I won't. I will just listen.</p><p>He sank his eyes into her golden ones and nodded. He took a deep breath and started to speak.</p><p>…</p><p>-"You know Tsuruga Ren is a stage name. I'm actually not completely Japanese. I have grown up in another country until my sixteen year old. There, Show business and acting is very competitive. I was born from very famous parents. They were and still are very wonderful, very loving and sweet parents but they were also very busy. Growing up with them I quickly discovered my love from acting and started making my path into business. I loved acting and wanted to become an actor as great as my dad".</p><p>He smiled sadly at that.</p><p>-"It's after that, things became complicated. When I would get a role, directors would expected me to act at the level of my dad or to just act like my dad. Or I would discover that I was hired for the role just because I was my dad's son. With time passing it would get stuffing and progressively I would get more and more the impression that people didn't expect of me anything but to be a copy of my dad. Not to be my own person, not to have my own way of acting. Just "<em>Do like your dad".</em> His shadow was just too big for me to have my own place. On the side, I also got bullied a lot, fired a lot because I wouldn't abbey the directors of because of the bullies. I already knew several martial at that time but I was taught to net use them to fight and more importantly I didn't want to trouble my parents with my problems. So, for a long time, I just take the habit of not defending myself".</p><p>A genuine but nostalgic smile crossed his face then and Kyoko wondered what he was thinking about.</p><p>-"Then teenage years begun and I met Rick, a goofy three years older than me actor. I was twelve at that time. We quickly became friends and he sort of took me under his wing for a while. He would teach me about a lot of things. He taught me to not be a chicken, he pushed me to defend myself in front of people that would target me".</p><p>A painful frown and a grim expression made their appearances on Ren's face and Kyoko could guessed that now was when things got a turn for the worst.</p><p>-"Time passed, Rick became my best and mostly only friend. I was having more and more difficulties in the industry, getting fired all the time or not even going anymore. I wasn't talking much to my parents anymore because every single time I would be with them, I would know how to face them, I was afraid to disappointed them so much. They knew I wasn't okay but that's the most of it. I was hiding as much as I could from them. Frustration had grown; anger too".</p><p>-" I could never go freely, I was stuck because of expectations, of false rumours and my own incapacity to take some step back from the situation. The bullying had shifted to outright fight at that time and though I still wasn't defending myself, my thoughts had turned a lot more darker; I was feeling so much hate everything else was fading".</p><p>-"Then one day, I just-…Broke…I got rampaged on them. I was so angry, so fucking furious, murderous even, I fought…Or more like I made a mess out of them. Out of my former bullies. I didn't just defend myself but beat them out until they couldn't stand, couldn't even stay conscious…And I enjoyed it. I very much enjoyed it. It was pure madness but I was in such crazy furore I was having fun beating them all there was no more me, I was only murderous folly…At that time, a part of me got twisted…Got so dark its beyond redemption".</p><p>-"On the day, Rick was there because he had guessed I was getting ambushed again. His fiancée Tina too. He started to make me stop because I was getting too far in the beating. Then the leader escaped. Cedric Bennet".</p><p>-Yeah, that explained my reaction of earlier Ren said when he saw Kyoko angry face.</p><p>She had known. She had known from the beginning it might be him or that he might be involved but still it was far more worse that she had imagined.</p><p>
  <em>That scum…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko looked back at Ren and waited.</p><p>He sighed with pain and his shoulders started to tremble. Kyoko rubbed soothing circles on his back with one hand.</p><p>-"I run after him. He was the main reason I had been bullied and had suffered. I crossed a road and continued to run then I had heard the shrieking sound of brakes behind me and I looked back just in time to see… Ri-…Rick's bo-body being rammed by a car before flying high in the air".</p><p>Kyoko had put her hands in front of her mouth and her tears had begun to roll when she closed her arms around Ren's shaking body.</p><p>-"He was already dead before we could called for help but I rushed back. I remember wanting to put back all his blood in his body, knowing he would need it, I remember thinking that he couldn't be dead, he was the most alive of all."</p><p>Kyoko hold him tighter and pulled at his pullover's fabric vigorously as he continued.</p><p>-" I remember Tina holding Rick's body against her and screaming at me it was my fault, that I should cease to exist instead of Rick, screaming I was a murderer, which was true".</p><p>
  <em>Oh Ren…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko breath hitched but he kept going.</p><p>"-After that, it's a bit of a blur. I know I was utterly broken and stayed into shock for weeks. I didn't care about anything anymore and the only reason I didn't attempt to-…well…finished things…was because I didn't care enough about being alive or not to do something about it. At that time, my father called boss, ah, Lory Takarada, to help. The boss came and sent me a lifebuoy in the sort of a proposition. I could stay here mourning or I could come with him and reinvent myself under another name and start again acting in Japan without the support of my parents and without anyone knowing our connection until I would come back proudly on my own. I accepted and left with only my passport in my pocket. Without even saying goodbye to my parents."</p><p>-You know the rest he added at last.</p><p>He had detached himself from her at the end of his story and his head hanged low, he wouldn't look at her. He was too afraid of her reaction, of the face she would make.</p><p>-Now, can you still say I'm not a monster? I'm a murderer at the least. It's pretty much the same in the end.</p><p>Tears were flowing down on Kyoko's face and she was openly crying.</p><p>
  <em>He suffered so much…He lost so much…It made so much more sense with Corn's story now that I know…He genuinely thinks he's cursed and bring only pain to others…He's still blaming him for his friend's death…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He had told me all of this so calmly, if it wasn't for the shaking, nothing would have seem out of ordinary.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Through his words she had begin to see what sort of child he had been, a kind and quiet one, already driven by acting but one that had taken the habit of closing everything inside until inevitable explosion…</em>
</p><p>After sniffing a bit she still managed to reply.</p><p>-Sorry but I disagree.</p><p>Ren swiftly lift his head to look at her.</p><p>-What do you mean?</p><p>-You're not a monster. Neither a murderer.</p><p>Ren blinked with surprised for a second.</p><p>-How can you say that? How can you be so calm about it? I killed someone. My best-friend died because of me.</p><p>-No, you didn't.</p><p>-Of course I did. Didn't you listen to what I said?!</p><p>-I listened to every word of it. But you didn't.</p><p>-I did. He died because of me.</p><p>-Oh, was it you who were driving?</p><p>-No. But it doesn't change a thing. It's still my fault he half-scream with guilt all over his face.</p><p>
  <em>Oh my poor fairy…You are still torturing you…after all those years…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko looked at him with a constricted smile.</p><p>-No. It isn't your fault.</p><p>-Kyoko, don't try to pity me or reassured me, I know it's the truth, I don't need to have been the driver to know it.</p><p>A beautiful foxy glint appeared in the eyes of Kyoko and she shrugged.</p><p>
  <em>I give up…this habit if totally engraved in me now…Damn you…</em>
</p><p>-Okay. So if I understand you clearly, you wanted the death of your best-friend, right?</p><p>Ren looked at her with a shocked pain looked</p><p>-What?! Never I would do anything to take back what happened that day. I would even sacrifice my own life if it could bring him back. Why are saying that, Kyoko? After everything I told you how can you ask me something like tha-</p><p>She smiled with kindness though a bit of ruse stayed there.</p><p>-Because you are telling me it's your fault.</p><p>-Because it is he said, his tortured expression telling just how low he thought of himself.</p><p>
  <em>Oh no boy…I won't let you self-destructed yourself…You are mean to fly in the sky, high …So that everyone can see how wonderful of an actor you are…And how kind of a person you are…</em>
</p><p>She took his face into her hands.</p><p>-Do you know what a murderer is?</p><p>-Kyoko! He said his broken look more stricken than ever.</p><p>-Ren, please.</p><p>-It's a man who killed someone his raspy sandpaper voice said.</p><p>It's a man who caused the death of one or several people Kyoko corrected and wanted them to die. Were you driving the car? No. Did you wish for him to die? No. Did you scheme with the driver to kill him?</p><p>-Of course not! But-</p><p>-But what? How can you think you are a monster? A murderer? When you are still blaming yourself for his death. Years after it happened. When you are still forbidding yourself any happiness as a punishment.</p><p>He shook his head frantically, refusing to accept what she was saying.</p><p>-You are wrong. It's just normal. It's normal I pay for what I did, it's normal I don't deserve happiness after that. I robbed Rick of his life and both him and Tina from happiness.</p><p>Kyoko grabbed him by his shoulders and rose on her knees to be at eye level.</p><p>-No it's not. Because it wasn't your fault. You didn't end Rick's life. You didn't want him to die. A murderer wants to kill, a monster doesn't have a conscience, Ren. Death doesn't haunt those sort of people. They rejoiced in it.</p><p>He shook his head again.</p><p>She took his visage in her palms again, forcing him to look at her.</p><p>-It wasn't your fault she repeated. You didn't end your friend's life. His own choices did.</p><p>-What! You are blaming him for his death?! Ren yelled outraged.</p><p>-I'm not. I'm just saying he knew what he was doing when he crossed that road she calmy replied.</p><p>-What do you mean? How could he-</p><p>-It was his choice! Ren! His choice, not your fault! Kyoko yelled this time.</p><p>-No. NO! no-no-no. You are wrong.</p><p>-Why?</p><p>-Because! Because he was there because of me! He involved himself with me and that got him killed. That's why I'm cursed. How can you not be disgusted at me?!</p><p>He was shaking so much, blaming himself so much for the death of his friend.</p><p>
  <em>Did he even allowed himself to grieve…?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>God! If you think I'm gonna give up on you like that…You're going to see another thing coming…</em>
</p><p>-Yes but it was still his choice. His. Not yours she said again.</p><p> -Or did your force him to come that day? She asked to taunt him again.</p><p>-No. no-no-no. But it was because he cared, he shouldn't have care. He got killed because he cared.</p><p>She hit him, her frustration in front of his stubbornness growing.</p><p>-Ren she murmured, he didn't got killed because of you, because of his care but <em>for</em> you, because he cared more about you than about the risks he was taking. He wanted to prevent you to going too far, to make a mistake; it was a gift not a blame he gave you that day.</p><p>Ren's eyes were growing impossibly big and Kyoko saw for the first time she was going through his incommensurable guilt and pain so she continued before the fogginess of guilt catch him again outside of reach.</p><p>-Just before, you said to me you would give your life to prevent him for him die, right?</p><p>He nodded slowly.</p><p>-There are different types of friends, some that care about you until some point and other that are unconditional ones. Ren, if it had been me instead of Rick, I would have made the same choice, I would have put safety aside and risked everything if I had thought you were in danger and If something had happened to me on that path, I would never have blamed you for my choices Kyoko said the voice trembling with hidden emotion.</p><p>Ren's eyes went enormous with shock, fear and panic before he yelled at her while rocking her wildly:</p><p>-Don't ever say that again!! No one should ever sacrifice his life for me trying to rob her of her right to make that choice.</p><p>He then circled her in his arms, holding her tighter and shaking more strongly than ever.</p><p>
  <em>I would have Ren did it…I would always do it…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>How can you not see your own light?</em>
</p><p>-Ren Kyoko whispered after holding him for a bit, If it had been you instead of Rick, if your places had been swapped, would you have risk everything for him?</p><p>-Of course. He was my friend Ren said with tremor.</p><p>-Then Kyoko added with a sly smile but with tears coming again at the suffering she could feel from him, if something were to have happened to you while you were trying to help him, would you have rendered him responsible of what would have happened to you?</p><p>Ren didn't even miss a beat.</p><p>-Of course not. It wouldn't have been his fault; it would have been my responsibility, my-…<em>choice.</em></p><p>Kyoko detached herself from him and tilting her head on the side with the most tender smile he had ever seen on her she spoke:</p><p>
  <em>-Do you see now?</em>
</p><p>Speechless, he tried to speak, to protest against her reasoning…But,</p><p>He couldn't. She was right.</p><p>-No. No.</p><p>His eyes blinked several times, trying to refuse this new verity, this new perception.</p><p>-Yes.</p><p>In vain.</p><p>Because accepting it would mean accepting his disappearing and it was the most unbearable thing to imagine.</p><p>He laid his head against her shoulder, not quite believing it but tired of fighting, tired of denying a new vision that was already making roots in his mind and heart. Then gentle arms closed up on him and caressed his back nearly soothing him to sleep with the warm feeling emitting from her until something hit him again.</p><p>-I'm still a monster though he added with bitter acceptation.</p><p>-Oh why is it like that? She quietly asked, her voice muffled as she put her face in the crook of his neck.</p><p><em>God! This situation is becoming very dangerous very fast </em>Kyoko thought. She was feeling drugged by his scent but mostly after hearing all that the only thing she wanted was hold him against her until the end of times.</p><p>-Even without Rick's situation, I nearly killed several people and I enjoyed beating them.</p><p>-You had every rights to beat them up, they had hurt you for years, you had the right to defend yourself and it's not that unexpected that once you actually started to reply to them and fight you got loose on them after everything they did to you she said pushing aside his arguments and Ren felt her waved one hand in the air above them like it was nothing and Kyoko sensed he was tensing again.</p><p>-It was very wrong of me to do that. I would have killed them without the intervention of Rick. I think you are being too indulgent on me he protested with irritation.</p><p>-I'm not she huffed in a half-smile before pulling apart to Ren upmost disappointment. I never said it was the right thing to do she said looking at him. Well you could defend yourself, that was even a must but yes beating them into pulps might not have been necessary. What I'm saying is it was understandable that you couldn't limit yourself to fend them back. Not good but understandable, human. Something that can happen when someone had been hurt very badly and is confronted with his tormentor. I don't see how else you could have reacted honestly after being hurt that bad.</p><p>-More maturely. Dropping the fight he answered bitterly.</p><p>-You were sixteen and you are human Kyoko murmured, you are allowed to mistakes you know.</p><p>He grumbled but didn't have anything else to argue.</p><p>-And more importantly, I don't think you could have killed them even without your friend's help.</p><p>-I assure you I would have.</p><p>-Nop. Ren, you told me you have mastered several martial arts. Don't go telling you didn't until when you could go. If you had really wanted them to be dead, well, they would be dead.</p><p>-You're so persuaded that you are a monster but that's not the man I see from this side. The death of your dear friend was a tragic accident; he decided to take all the risks <em>for you </em>and unfortunately got hit by a car. Nothing of this would ever make it your fault. You have to believe this.</p><p>Kyoko looked at his sorrowful face all crumpled in pain and raised her hand to caress his cheek her thumb.</p><p>He gazed at her and put his hand above the one on his cheek, rubbing his face on it and Kyoko tried to ignore her accelerating heart.</p><p>-Did you ever even allowed yourself to grief? Kyoko asked with gentle worry.</p><p>He averted his gaze.</p><p>-I don't have that right.</p><p>
  <em>Oh Ren…</em>
</p><p>She raised again on her knees and made him look at her again.</p><p>-Of course you have that right. You know how I said it was for you he did all this and not your fault.</p><p>-Yes and?</p><p>
  <em>It's going to hurt him…</em>
</p><p>She frowned in agony on the perspective but it needed to be done if she wanted to even slightly help him.</p><p>-Don't you think you should thank him for his efforts rather rob yourself of happiness. He made this choice for you, for your future, for your happiness and here you are forbidding you of all for what he sacrificed his life.</p><p>His expression got so much grieve stricken and shocked that Kyoko wanted to take back her words instantly and he turned his face away. His hands were shaking She persisted.</p><p>-Ren?</p><p>She knew he heard her but he wouldn't look at her.</p><p>-Ren?</p><p>He turned to her with apprehension.</p><p>-Knowing that, Don't you think that rather it would be good to honour him and in homage to him to thank him by being as happy as you can be in this life, by being as happy as for two people, for you, the life he saved and for him the life that was lost. For the happiness he won't have in this life. It's not by punishing yourself you are going to give him tribute. He didn't take all this risks for you do that. Do you understand?</p><p>
  <em>How can you think it's your fault…adorable idiot…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He's just too kind for the world he grew up in…</em>
</p><p>Right at this very moment Kyoko could see the realizing and acceptation finally sinking. Slowly, very slowly, little by little she saw in his eyes as he was beginning to believe her, to understand her words and to accept her view. She saw the very moment he couldn't deny the truth in her words when he stopped looking away from her with guilt. His vision of it was shifting smoothly on its axe and his eyes were clearing.</p><p>-You really think so? He at last asked her with a sheepish look.</p><p>She chuckled a bit.</p><p>-Yup. It would be the best way to thank him.</p><p>-Right.</p><p>He still looked a bit tensed but he was slowly seeming to relax.</p><p>-So? Now, are you going to allowed yourself to grieve?</p><p>He looked at her puzzled before understanding what she was talking about.</p><p>-I…Maybe…I don't know how to…</p><p>
  <em>God Ren…How could you ever think of you as a monster when you blamed yourself like that…</em>
</p><p>-Well. You can scream, shout and cry to the face of the world your pain for example. The concept is to evacuate the negatives emotions like anger, guilt and sadness she whispered in a breath.</p><p>-I see.</p><p>He looked so perplexed by the notion Kyoko nearly laughed.</p><p>
  <em>When was the last time he let go of his emotions…?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Did he ever cry since he was little…?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The boy she remembered from his memories was already incredibly mature for his age. </em>
</p><p>-You can also ask for me leave to do that…Or for comfort if you wish for it…Well if it helps you…</p><p>-I would like that he muttered after a few seconds.</p><p>-Which one?</p><p>-…</p><p>-A hug he eventually said.</p><p>Kyoko agreed without a word and approached him before finally embracing him in her arms, pressing him strongly against her in a moment where her emotions got the best of her and she felt assaulted by all the pain she was feeling for him.</p><p>At a moment, she didn't know when, his shoulders had shrunk and he had sealed his arms around her waist before crushing her in a gripping bear-hug so strong she was barely breathing. Holding her for dear life like she risked disappearing. Not that she cared.</p><p>She was in his arms. And more importantly-</p><p>
  <em>He's finally grieving.</em>
</p><p>She was rubbing soothing circles on his back when she had felt it.</p><p>She had felt Ren's body quake violently, like it was in a storm then he had shivered in chilling fashion and then finally, finally; the dam broke the torrent of emotions he had kept inside and after a few short quickened breaths, quiet fat drops began to fall in her neck.</p><p>Her own tears started to fall in sympathy and she grabbed at him strongly while crying for him, with him.</p><p>He didn't say a word. He just cried soundly in her arms.</p><p>
  <em>That's right. Let go. Let go.</em>
</p><p>But sometimes his breath would shorten again and he would hold her tighter.</p><p>At the end though he started to talk, muttering in her neck again and again incoherent things until she was able to decipher some of them.</p><p>-He shouldn't have died. He shouldn't have died.</p><p>Again and again. He repeated it.</p><p>-I know she simply answered.</p><p>Then later.</p><p>-I don't want to forget him because I'm accepting to…He whispered.</p><p>-Accepting he's gone doesn't mean to forget or give up on him. You will just relearn to really live. You won't ever forget him.</p><p>Other tears came and he eventually murmured:</p><p>I miss him.</p><p><em>God Ren! </em>Kyoko cried surprised at the amplitude of his sorrow while he was finally releasing all of his pain contained for years inside, shaking and choking a bit even at last.</p><p>With the man she loved in her arms crying for the first time in front of her, more vulnerable as ever; Kyoko suddenly had an epiphany.</p><p>She realized she couldn't stand to see him that hurts, to know that he lived so much painful moments in his life, she couldn't stand it.</p><p>She didn't want to see him that sad ever again.</p><p>
  <em>Never again.</em>
</p><p>She wanted him to be happy. From the bottom of her heart she wished for him to be happy. And in one infinitesimal second she realized her vision had shifted, changed. Definitively. Kyoko discovered that now she didn't care so much with who he could be, with who he would be. As long as he was happy.</p><p>That she was now ready to see him with someone else and would even manage to be glad for him if he'd found happiness with that person. And to even wish for him to find that person.</p><p>Oh, it would kill her little by little, very slowly and agonisingly when it would happen and she would be jealous as hell and it would hurt more than anything she had ever known.</p><p>Even more. Because with every moment spent with him learning to know him more, he was becoming more precious for her and the love for the incredible person he was kept growing exponentially with little details she got from him. Her heart was melting in infinite tenderness at this very moment.</p><p>Still, now she knew, she rather be tortured by her forbidden feelings than seeing this man miserable or alone until the end of his life.</p><p>Later on.</p><p>Kyoko had seen he was slowly calming down and was ready to let go. Because really, it was too comfortable being in his arms and holding him in hers and that was dangerous.</p><p>But for an obscure reason, he didn't seem to let go because when she tried to detach herself, he just grasped at her tighter.</p><p>-Give a minute.</p><p>-Okay.</p><p>Wait.</p><p>
  <em>Could it be…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>No way…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Could he be embarrassed?</em>
</p><p>Kyoko tried to look at his face by the side and he turned his face the other way.</p><p>
  <em>How cute!</em>
</p><p>She giggled inwardly. She still had time to see his eyes were all puffy.</p><p><em>Well, it's still not as flagrant as when he has a raccoon mask…</em>she thought with a smile when he started to wiggle.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I was planning to end this chapter with the little bit that still needs to happen there but it was getting too long so the part of this will be post in next chapter. Then it should have like three to five chapters more and we will begin the second part of the story. If what I planned go through well, there will be three parts in this story. The first one being the shortest of them all XD. I'm not suited for short.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. A sip of a whisper~Reunited~ ~Let's drop every masks but one~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I DO NOT OWN SKIP BEAT. Yoshiki Nakamura does.<br/>~Together in the world~<br/>Part four</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ren didn't know how to face her.</p><p>Nested in her welcoming arms, his head was resting at her front, his locks surely ticking her collarbones with his wriggling. He couldn't help it though. His mind was a warm mushy mess. His unexpected and recent bout of emotion had drained all the kept vitality out of him. Hovering over the last ashes of his sadness dying with the last tears he had shed, he was experiencing an out of body experience of the like he supposed.</p><p>His right hand unconsciously rises to wipe off the wetness at his face and he wondered distantly when the last time he had cried was. He couldn't remember.</p><p>Ren felt like he was floating in the accepting warmth she radiated but at the same time he had never felt so anchored than in her embrace. He was hearing the pulsing beat of her life right into his ear from where he was and every little beating were soothing but also uplifting him.  More than anything, he wished he could stay in her comforting arms. On a cloud, he didn't think he could worry about anything as long as he was cradled by those arms. He felt like he could fly. Like he was already flying. Just because she was hugging him. He wasn't even sure he had ever felt as safe in the past as he was feeling at the moment.</p><p>Lulled by her caresses in his hair and her beating heart, his head cushioned by her flexible curves, soothed by her heat and scent and appeased from the bottom of his soul because he was able to hold her in his arms and was in hers too.</p><p>Most of all, what had him truly inhaled with life again, what had inspired him in smooth but uttered alteration of his beliefs, of his conscience were her sincere words. Her unique view of his past troubles, her way to make him see things the way she saw it. Her acceptance of his faults but also her refusal to damn him without reflexion. Her guidance in making him see the truth.</p><p>He chuckled inwardly.</p><p>
  <em>She had totally twisted words and things until I couldn't help but react…</em>
</p><p> He felt such a surge of tenderness to the figure holding him, overpowered by such deep feelings he didn't have the words to express them anymore. His breath got pinned in his exploding heart and he squashed the subject of his overwhelming sweet torment in a craving hug.</p><p>His heart was quenching. Again and again. A weird constricted pain squeezing his chest repeatidly by the force of his feelings. Choked by the debilitating affection he felt for her, clenching in his longing for her.</p><p>
  <em>How can you be pained physically by feelings? How can your very flesh, the muscle pulsing blood into your body can truly quench from invisible emotions?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>How can you feel so much for someone?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>How can you go on with such a yearning craving to take control? To obliterate everything else?</em>
</p><p>His answer came so easily he didn't realise it at first and began to detach himself from her warmth, hoping to find his reply in the pool of her kind golden eyes.</p><p>
  <em>For her.</em>
</p><p>The words came into his mind right before he fell into gold.</p><p>Then he tried to speak.</p><p>
  <em>How do you voice such a magnitude? How can I voice it? Nothing I could ever say will ever convey how much I owed her…The depth of what I feel…</em>
</p><p>He tried to express the endless words of gratitude he felt…The flame that was burning him alive at this very moment but all of them got stuck in his throat and he stayed there with red perplexed innocent eyes and open mouth when she brushed all of it aside with a question.</p><p>-Are you okay? Do you feel better? Or worse? You don't look so good? Can I do something?</p><p>…                  </p><p>When Ren had pulled away, he had looked at Kyoko so awed and bewildered that Kyoko had thought something was wrong with him.</p><p>
  <em>He looked like he didn't know his right and his left anymore…</em>
</p><p>So in front of his forfeit face, she had worried and rushed words out.</p><p>-Are you okay? Do you feel better? Or worse? You don't look so good… Can I do something?</p><p>He opened his mouth and closed it. Once more.</p><p>She took his hand and he looked at it with wonders. Before giggling sweetly.</p><p>Giggling!</p><p>Tsuruga Ren did not do giggling. And Corn neither from what she knew.</p><p>
  <em>It's far too girly for him…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko looked at him in horror when he started looking at the starry sky with an enchanting content smile.</p><p>She squeezed his hand and he stared back at her.</p><p>-Earth to Ren, are you there?</p><p>-Hum-Hum he replied with a delicate smile looking at her.</p><p>
  <em>I broke him, didn't I? He looks like he short-circuited badly… </em>
</p><p>Kyoko studied him with a bittersweet smile, half worried, half amused. He looked positively giddy though completely out of it. The corners at his eyes were quite red and humid transparent streaks were still visible on his fair smooth skin running on each cheek.</p><p>Still between his bent knees, she drew up again walking on hers. Delicately she palmed both of his cheeks in her cold fingers and brushed the wetness aside with her thumbs looking deeply, desperately into his eyes.</p><p>She got shocked by the sight that mirrored in them. Because, no matter how she looked at them and beside all the absurdity of it, he was wearing contacts for god's sake; his eyes still seemed lighter to her than before. No, not just lighter, they seemed the clearest she had ever seen them and more importantly they watched the world with new fire, alighted with blazing life.</p><p>
  <em>It still doesn't make any sense though…I shouldn't be able to see it…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Maybe it's just my mind playing tricks on me, it's late after all.</em>
</p><p>Kyoko wanted to know if he was okay though so she called to him.</p><p>-Ren?</p><p>-Hum?</p><p>-Ren? Please, snap out of it. Are you okay?</p><p>She starred at him with worry growing when he seemed to understand that something was wrong. He blinked several time and truly looked at her. Then, though late, he gently replied.</p><p>-I'm okay. I think. Just overwhelmed and shocked. Well, mostly. I think?</p><p>-You sure? Kyoko asked again because he had really begun to worry her.</p><p>-Yes he answered with tenderness seeping out by every pores of his skin while putting his owns hands on top of the one still holding his cheeks. And this time, this time she knew he was back because he gave her the most genuine affectionate expression she had ever received from him. Even his eyes were ignited with something weird coming close to surrender.</p><p>
  <em>Such a terrific face palette…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I should not look at the sun too much or I'm going to melt…</em>
</p><p>-I have something to tell you he said suddenly with a determinate but grim face and released her hands.</p><p>Kyoko watched his air with new concern and dropped her hands, he seemed nearly as stern and nervous as before starting this discussion.</p><p>-You look like it's the end of the world she said matter of fact.</p><p>-I don't know.</p><p><em>The end of my world at least… </em>Ren thought bitterly.</p><p>
  <em>It can't be more sensitive and intense that what we just talked about, right?</em>
</p><p>-Where would you put it if compared to what we just discussed? Kyoko asked to prepare herself psychologically.</p><p>- Worse? He said with an awkward laugh.</p><p>She arched her brow, not amused.</p><p>He scratched his neck and wriggled before whispering.</p><p>-Everything depends on your reaction actually. So, I don't really know if it will be bad or cathartic or even worse. But it's something you deserve to know.</p><p>
  <em>Must be pretty bad if he thinks I can only react negatively…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And he's so nervous…</em>
</p><p>It made her anxious to see him so unsure of him…She wasn't use to it…</p><p>Kyoko was really afraid of what he had to say now. She was scared of what it could be.</p><p>
  <em>What if he say he doesn't want to be friend anymore? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I stepped far out of line after all…It would be normal…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>No. Not that…I wouldn't be able to handle that…I can accept with time that he will end up with someone else and be happy for him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>But…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I want to stay his friend…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I want to stay part of his life…</em>
</p><p>Her hands started to shake violently.</p><p>
  <em>But he said I had to know…And he accepted to tell me, show me so much already…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>It was me who forced him to talk…It wouldn't be right to not him do so if it's important to him after pushing exactly to do that…</em>
</p><p>She was still terrified though.</p><p>
  <em>But then, everything he had revealed to me until now wasn't what it seemed to be…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And this idiot tended to condemned himself for everything in advance…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko sighed.</p><p>
  <em>I can't. I can't judge him like that. Not before knowing. Not after everything I learn.</em>
</p><p>
  <em> Truth is will set it all.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And part to me want to know…want to know everything he has to say…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Everything he wishes to share with me…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Everything he is…</em>
</p><p>That's settle it, she concluded.</p><p>-Okay Kyoko replied with a more relaxed smile. I'm all ears to you tonight. I already said it, right?</p><p>It didn't seem to have the right effect on him and assured him because he coloured a bit and got even more jittery.</p><p>Kyoko saw him take a large good inhalation of air before he grasped her hands into his, his owns trembling even more than hers.</p><p>-You remember, at the beginning when I told you my name was a stage name, right? He asked with pressing eyes.</p><p>-Yes, I remember.</p><p>-Well, the thing I want you to know is my true name Ren explained to her with renewed anxiety.</p><p>
  <em>Kyoko blinked. Once. Two.</em>
</p><p>He inhaled again. Then expired.</p><p>-You already met my parents but I will still say it that way. My birth name is Kuon. Hizuri Kuon.</p><p>
  <em>Oh. So that was what he was so…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hahaha…Hahahaha…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And here he got me worried…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Oh you!</em>
</p><p>She saw him waiting for her reaction anxiously, nearly itchy so much so he was restless. His eyes begging her to understand; following her every moves, her every breaths.</p><p>
  <em>Awkward big worrywart…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Don't scare me like that!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You silly!</em>
</p><p>Kyoko softly smiled at him.</p><p>Then, she calmly sat back on her feet, laid one elbow on her thigh and put her chin on the knuckles of the same arm, quiet amusement bubbling out of her.</p><p>-Yes, that I know.</p><p>-I'm really sorry Ren followed. I know you met my dad, I promise you he had no ill intention and I couldn't tell you for the reasons you just lear-</p><p>-What?!! Wha-What did you just say?</p><p>He looked so utterly dumbfounded Kyoko had to check herself to forbid a laugh to get through.</p><p>-I know.</p><p>-You knew I was Kuon? But since when? How? Why did you not tell me? HOW? Wait. Give me a minute, my head is spinning he said while holding his forehead with his right hand.</p><p>Kyoko was ready to answer but after some quick pondering he looked even a bit relieved and started again.</p><p>-Wait. There is something else.</p><p>He looked at her with pain in the eyes.</p><p>-I'm sorry. Nothing that I will say will make it better. I know you will be disappointed but hiding this for you longer wouldn't be correct and I swore to myself I would tell you. But I didn't know how to do so. I didn't want to ruin that for you. This innocence and beliefs you have are part of what you are, I didn't want to be the reason it would change. But I must tell you.</p><p>Kyoko watched him with puzzled written all over her face.</p><p>
  <em>What is he talking about? Knowing you are Kuon didn't ruin anything for me…</em>
</p><p>-What do you mean, she finally asked?</p><p>Ren closed his eyes and bent his head low to her until he was nearly folded up over himself.</p><p>-Pardon me Kyoko he murmured with agony in his voice knowing what he would tell her will most possibly hurt her and her innocence more than anything he could have done or said. In that instant, he would have done anything, anything for him to be in reality a true fairy. For reality to shift, for her to have met other fairies so that this truth wouldn't damage her beliefs, her amazing view of the world. He begged with all his heart for a miracle, hoping against all odd it wouldn't hurt her and whispered in the quietest and most hurtful voice Kyoko had ever heard coming from him, worse than when he telling his story about his friend:</p><p>-Pardon me. I'm going to tell you a story.</p><p>She nodded gravely entrapped in this serious atmosphere.</p><p>"          Once upon a time, he began, there was a little boy visiting a little town while his father was acting. Pushed by loneliness and recent issues he was starting to have in his attempts to act by his own, in flying; he left his dad to his work and adventured himself into the lush green woods surrounding the town of Kyoto. Walking blindly, hoping to find haven and peace here. To not be bothered by anyone, to not be dad's son.</p><p>"          Then, right past some twist on his path he discovered the most beautiful clearing in the world. A rushing little waterfall splashing in a large river where water light reflection would project thousands different colours and surrounded by rocks of every sizes and shapes. And on each riverside tens and tens of flowers nesting. In this hidden sparkling spot, this clearing looked like some places picked out of some fairy-tale and that little boy decided to stay there while he was in this country. What a surprise he had when the next day as he was simply resting barged a little girl with crying eyes but blazing eyes and ponytails came and asked him<em> are you a fairy?</em></p><p>"          At that time, the little boy didn't hesitate even one second and replied that he was. The little girl looked so happy, so excited to have meet a fairy that he didn't have the heart to tell her he was not. So he became one.</p><p>"          He became one. For her. He jumped as high as he could, flew for her in the sky.  He had already acted in his life but never before had he felt such a joy while playing as for the first time he discovered the true passion, the true love for acting while pretending to be a fairy prince. But he was acting on the magic part, he never cheated on what he shared with the little girl. He deeply loved to be a fairy. It was the role he has loved the most until now.</p><p>"          He never had to pretend to like spending his time with her. She was four years younger, very sweet, very caring, very strong for her age, an hard-working girl that wanted to make her mother proud. Most of all she was an incredible little girl with an unique innocence and amazing imagination.</p><p>"          So he never told her. He cherished in secret her fantasy about the fairy corn hoping to cheer her up, to make her laugh, to make her smile and loved every minute of it. Unfortunately the time came for him to go home, he was only there to visit after all. Not hoping he would be fortunate enough to meet her again and wanting to erase her tears he gave her his stone and showed her the magic of it.</p><p><em>"</em>          Then he had to leave. He never forgot about her but time passed and things became more difficult for him, he still couldn't stretch his wings in the sky and some terrible things happened until he found himself in Japan again reinventing him again under another name. Hoping he would be able to make amends for his sins, to prove himself, to show he was worth of acting and maybe one day worth to shine alongside his parents.</p><p>"          And then the young man met her again. The little girl. She had grown a lot. She was so different he couldn't recognize her at first. She was seeking revenge at that time and he couldn't accept that. Until one day she dropped the very stone he hadn't seen in more than ten years and shouted as if not a day passed <em>Corn!</em></p><p>"          From this moment, he knew it was her, he knew she was the little girl from his past, from his childhood. But time had passed and they had both changed a lot, they didn't even stand each other at that time. They didn't know each other anymore, they were just strangers with memories of bright old days. Even more, he had swear to himself no one should know about who he was until he had proven himself and couldn't trust her at that time. So he didn't tell her.</p><p>"          Time flew and reasons to not tell her crumbles pieces by pieces. He learn to know who she had become. Discovered that though she had been badly hurt and was seeking revenge, she was still the same little girl; caring and selfless to a fault and more determinate than anyone in the world. He saw her starting to love acting and saw he could trust her. But at the same time he learnt she was still believing in fairies or more precisely in Corn the fairy. " It was adorable but at the same time he felt conflicted and thought he couldn't do that to her. Couldn't tell her the cute little boy she had met was not only not a fairy but also such a wretch of human being. He no, I didn't want to disappoint her and didn't want to crush that beautiful innocence of her more than it had already been by a selfish brat." I'm sorry Kyoko-chan, Ren humbly painfully ended with a bow.</p><p>Kyoko stared at him. Endless tears were streaming down her face but she was trying to hold back her sobs until he finished his story.</p><p>
  <em>Ohhhh…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko couldn't express how dear this moment was to her, how moved she felt he eventually entrusted her with his last secrets, their secrets.</p><p>
  <em>…Silly fairy…</em>
</p><p>She was so happy.</p><p>
  <em>You finally, finally told me! </em>
</p><p>Her tears of joy kept rolling and rolling, so happy that she was that he finally told her.</p><p>
  <em>I was hoping one day he would but-…</em>
</p><p>-I'm sorry. I'm-I'm-…</p><p>-You are Corn, my fairy human prince. Yes I know, Kyoko completed for him her voice shaking and aborning a blinding teary smile.</p><p>-I'm sorry he eventually said still bent over, I know you must be hurt and disappointed that I'm not a fairy but at least understand I never intended to deceive you, I had no ill intentions. I-</p><p>
  <em>Oh god…idiot.</em>
</p><p>He is going to keep chastise himself if she didn't do something.</p><p>-Not really. I already knew.</p><p>One hundredth of second later he bolted upright starring at her crazily.</p><p>-Come again. What did you just say?</p><p>Kyoko chuckled.</p><p>-I said I already knew Mr fairy.</p><p>He gaped at her. Floored by her reply. Flabbergasted even.</p><p>-Repeat that.</p><p>-I knew.</p><p>He stared at her frozen, opening and closing his mouth for a while before blurting one word.</p><p>-How?</p><p>-Well, Kyoko started, Once upon a time there was a man who got himself drugged and got his friend calling some girl to rescue them. At that time, I happened to see your lens and then your roots. From there I kind of figured all out. I kind of guessed you were Corn and then I got curious at what sort of parents you could have if you were human and the answer kind of came itself and so I guessed you were Kuon too.</p><p>Resetting his mind, Ren fumbled to get words out, too stunned to cope.</p><p>-Bu-But…It was…a month and…half ago. Why didn't you… tell me, he prompted?</p><p>Kyoko smile endearingly at him.</p><p>-Because, she explained, It wasn't my place to do so. I didn't want to force you to share something you weren't ready to and I kind of got you had reasons to hid it from me. I didn't have the right to confront you about that.</p><p>-So, Kyoko added timidly, I kind of just hoped one day you would tell on your own when you will be ready.</p><p>Defeated and aghast, Ren observed her with growing amazement. What could he say to something like that?</p><p>-But…Wait! You don't look upset.</p><p>-I'm not.</p><p>-But why?!</p><p>Kyoko studied him puzzled with his behaviour. He seems nearly mad at me to not be…mad?</p><p>-Why aren't you angry at me? Or hurt? I mean I don't want to hurt you of course but I knew how much It meant to you that Corn was a fairy and I'm not.</p><p>-I know silly fairy.</p><p>-Then why? Why aren't launching yourself at me? Why aren't you yelling at me?</p><p>-Because I'm not angry.</p><p>-Kyoko! Please.</p><p>-It's the truth.</p><p>Don't try to spare me. Be honest damn it!</p><p>He was starting to annoy her.</p><p>-But I'm!</p><p>-I lied to you!</p><p>She huffed.</p><p>-I know.</p><p>-Then why damn it?!</p><p>-Ren, did you not tell me to fool me? No. You said so yourself. You didn't want to disappoint me. Plus you had more than enough reasons that explained why you couldn't tell even without that. You bet yourself on your anonymity.</p><p>-But you're so calm about it. And you didn't know about those reasons you just learnt them.</p><p>He looked even more restless with the answers she provided.</p><p>
  <em>Idiot.</em>
</p><p>Kyoko suddenly got angry.</p><p>-I know at least that much about you even without you telling me. Do you think I would be stupid enough to think that you of all of people would try, she shook her hand in the air, whether it's Corn or Ren, no of them is cruel. No one of them would hurt someone if they can avoid it.</p><p>-How can you be so sure of that after everything I told you? I'm so sure myself about that, he pulled at his hairs, clearly upset.</p><p>-Because I know enough about you. Idiot fairy.</p><p>-But I'm not. A fairy.</p><p>-I know Ren. It's completely absurd. Why are you trying to convince me to be angry at you when I try to convince you there is no reason to do so?</p><p>He peeked at her with an half-smile for a second before turning back to stern again.</p><p>-Because you should be angry. And you are not. Ridiculously so not.</p><p>-Deal with it, Kyoko grumbled with still baffled voice on this out of the world situation.</p><p>-I suppose begging for it won't help.</p><p>Kyoko rolled her eyes, hiding her amusement.</p><p>
  <em>Silly man. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Just accept it. I'm not angry. Why should I be…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko turned to him and forced him to sit back in front of her. Then she put her hands on his shoulders and tilted her head on this with an encouraging smile.</p><p>-Ren-Cor…Kuon…Arghhh How do I call you now? Now that's an issue.</p><p>He visibly frowned at her priorities before answering with smile but begrudgingly .</p><p>-Ren. I'm too used to it and I kind of like it, now. Though I don't mind if you call me Corn time to time either.</p><p>-Okay Ren. Now, I really don't understand why you are trying so much to whip yourself with this. You had good reasons and I guessed them somehow and you just confirmed them. I was even happy, very happy to discover that you and my childhood friend were one and only person. I also felt quick lucky.</p><p>Ren shook his head from sides to sides with stupefied amusement.</p><p>-You never cease to astonish me.</p><p>-And even more, I was mostly the one to declare you as a fairy. Both times, I didn't really give you a choice in the end she added.</p><p>He wished he could argue but on this point she was mostly right.</p><p>-It's like that she concluded, Put it in your stubborn silly mind. Plus, if anything, I was angry at myself.</p><p>-What? Why?</p><p>Ren was staring at her like she had lost her mind.</p><p>Kyoko smiled with disillusion.</p><p>-Because I felt so stupid. For not seeing it before. For being so blind. So naïve. Even more so at Guam. At least as a child I had excuses.</p><p>-Don't be ridiculous, Ren said, you weren't naïve, just innocent.</p><p>-It's the same idiot.</p><p>-No it's not. And it was cute. It's still is. And would you please stop calling me an idiot?</p><p>-You don't like your new nickname?</p><p>-It's quite vexing you know, are you really thinking that of me, he pouted a bit.</p><p>-I'm not. Silly.</p><p>He frowned.</p><p>And Kyoko giggled.</p><p>-I'm not telling you you're stupid. It's an endearing term for each time you are being silly by worrying unnecessarily or condemning yourself or things such alike.</p><p>He wrinkled his nose and stared at her doubtfully:</p><p>-Endearing term?</p><p>She grinned.</p><p>-Yup. If you want cuter ones, avoid doing those things.</p><p>He gaped at her again.</p><p>-You are really not mad?</p><p>Tenderly smiling, she caught his hands in her.</p><p>-Now, why would I be, she asked softly. On the contrary, I'm overjoyed you told me. And that it's you. Then looking austerely at him, Even if you made me think I was dealing with three different men at the same time, hmm…</p><p>Imaginative ears on his head sank and he muttered an apology again.</p><p>
  <em>So cute.</em>
</p><p>-And about Guam…</p><p>-Hmm?</p><p>Ren studied her seriously and breathing deeply:</p><p>-You said you felt stupid but really it was sweet, Kyoko blushed at that, and as I was being genuine, the only act was the one of being a fairy. And about the kiss I-</p><p>-I know. It was part of the act and well knowing you the second one must have been a parting one and a way to say thank you even if I don't really felt like I've help you that much at that time.</p><p>Stupefaction couldn't even come close to what strike him in the guts.</p><p>
  <em>And it's the only thing she didn't get right…why this? Why only this?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>She got everything and beyond…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Freed me and saved me to the point I can't even think a lifetime would be enough to repay her…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Multiplied my feelings in billions of ways…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Made me want to spend my life trying to make her happy whether or not she can ever reciprocate what I feel for her…</em>
</p><p>Beaten, realisation hit him. That's just it.</p><p>
  <em>I'm not here to be more than friend right now…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Whatever she sees me like, it's most likely not as a potential lover but it doesn't matter. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I will be whatever she wants me to be for her…And if right now, all she wants from me is friendship I will have to accept it and just hope that one day, one day more would be possible and that I would be able to pursue her freely.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Not that it can prevent to try every single day that will pass but unveiling my feelings doesn't sound good now.</em>
</p><p>-Yeah. Sort of, he replied at last. Accepting the ways things were but saddened by it nonetheless.</p><p>She beamed at him and he thought he imagined the little bit of sadness that crept in her eyes for a short second.</p><p>-Kyoko, he asked, starring deeply at her.</p><p>-Yes?</p><p>-Thank you he fondly said. For, well anything and everything and beyond.</p><p>-It's nothing she replied blushing a bit but brushing it aside like it didn't matter.</p><p>-No, it's not! He deadpanned a bit hurt by her casualness. You have no idea how much you helped me. How much I owed you for your words. For being so open. I would never have been able to see it the way you made me see what happened in the past without you. To really understand Rick intentions. For the first time ever I think I might reach the point where I can accept Rick's death was an accident. It will still take me some time but now I have reasons to believe it's the truth. Kyoko, It only happened because of you. And it's not nothing.</p><p>And to top it all, even with what I revealed to you about being Corn, you would have had every right to be upset, mad forever at me, to blame for lying, to be very disenchanted by what you learnt. Even if you already knew. I robbed you of the magic of that moment and-</p><p>-First of all, take that back, Kyoko hardly said before taking his face in her hands again. You didn't rob me of anything Ren, you hear me? I won't let you say or even ever think that way. Yes, that's right, you aren't a fairy. And maybe I was very slightly disappointed about the non-magical part. But I wasn't ever disappointed in you. And never thought that the moments we spent when we were kids or when we saw each other at Guam were less precious or less magic than they were.</p><p>She clearly saw he didn't believe her words for a second and was feeling guilty once more.</p><p>-But, he tried to protest before she cut in.</p><p>She rocked her head from sides to sides.</p><p>-I know. You aren't a fairy. But Ren when I discovered the truth, not once did I think that all was fake. Yes I wondered if you had had really some fun because I was younger and I know you spent a lot of time indulging me. Still-</p><p>-That's not true, he exclaimed. I enjoyed our time very much. Didn't I just say so?</p><p>-Yes. But I was talking about the moment I guessed about it so I didn't know that. But still I didn't enjoy spending time with you because you were a fairy but because you were you, Corn or Kuon, Whatever.</p><p>Ren widened. A new emotion breaking through.</p><p>-I have cared about you because of you, not because of your magic silly Corn. I would still have love those moments even if I had known you were an human boy.</p><p>-Oh.</p><p>-Yeah.</p><p>-And if you think about it what's made me think you were magic were due to first my imagination and second your act. If you hadn't played along and acted like one, I would have figured it out eventually. Well I suppose anyway. But my point was that you were the reason I believed. You didn't actually show me magic but I still believed in you.</p><p>-But that's because you didn't need much to believe I was one.</p><p>-Maybe. Still. I would have seen the truth if you hadn't accept to be a fairy for me. Even if I now know it was a trick, those moments are as magical as before for me if not more.</p><p>-What?! How?</p><p>-Because, Ren. Can't you see? It's you who made those moments special.</p><p>You made those moments in the clearing magic. Your companionship was magic. Because of who you were and still are. The way you did acrobatics in the sky. Our laughing moments. Our talks. This time with you is what was magic. Not the idea of you being a fairy or that you had actual magic.</p><p>-YOU were the magic, Kyoko ended in a murmur thick with emotion and she heard Ren gasped loudly.</p><p>-So, if anything, knowing you became Corn the fairy to make me happy made those times even more precious for me, idiot, Kyoko added finally with frustration getting the better of her and making shake her hands, tears at the corner of eyes.</p><p>Trying to control her raging feelings Kyoko didn't notice when large arms firmly captured her before gripping her in a fierce hug. Pinned in a broad chest, she perceived when he quietly whispered:</p><p>-Sorry. I didn't mean to vex you. I couldn't imagine you would feel that way. I'm…I'm very glad you feel that way.</p><p>-Yeah, you are an idiot. Of course I would care more about you and the times spent with you than if you have real magic.</p><p>-Are you sure it's an endearing term? Ren mumbled in half tender half amused half annoyed voice.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Enjoy. Kisses. Mimagfan.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. ~Together in the world~	 ~Goodbye & shady~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Nakamura sensei does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Touched by her words, Ren just blacked-out.</p><p><em>"You were the magic" </em>echoed in his dizzy mind again and again.</p><p>
  <em>To imagine that she would care about our times together enough to be more concerned with me than me being a fairy.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>To consider my very being and the moments together as the real magic…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>God this girl…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Stop saying such things…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Can't you see I'm already an ice-cream puddle…Melt at your feet…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>If you warm me any bit more I'm going to evaporate in the air…</em>
</p><p>After a little bit longer Ren felt Kyoko moved an inch away from him and observed him with worry.</p><p>…</p><p>-You okay?          </p><p>He nodded warmly.</p><p>-We should go back, you have work tomorrow, it's very late. Correction it's very soon, Kyoko said watching the sky brightening little by little as dawn was breaking gently the former night.</p><p>Ren watched the direction her eyes were looking and acquiesced absent-mindedly.</p><p>Kyoko extended her hands to him but he studied her with confusion.</p><p>-Can you stand mister fairy or should I carry you again, she proposed.</p><p>-I will never hear the end of this.</p><p>She giggled.</p><p>-Your fault Ren #Corn #Kuon. God you have too much names already.</p><p>He rocked his head from sides and longing hidden deep inside slowly stretched his long fingers to her extended hands catching them with delicate strength and let her pull himself up.</p><p>When he stumbled a bit, she steadied him and asked with an amused glint:</p><p>-You are sure you are firm on your feet?</p><p>-I will manage he grumbled and he ruffed her hair as a revenge. </p><p>She cheekily smiled at him.</p><p>They head back to the hotel and wished each other goodnight when they reached their respective rooms</p><p>. It will be the first of many nights Ren wouldn't be woken up by nightmares and wouldn't found sleep tortured by his thoughts. Just peaceful wonder. And slow realisation of how grateful he should be to his former friend.</p><p>…</p><p>When Kyoko woke up later that day, she finished packing her bag, she would take a plane tonight; and had the surprise to find Ren waiting for her when she opened up the door.</p><p>-Hi he brightly said.</p><p>
  <em>Too much happiness…arghh</em>
</p><p>She run her hand through her hair.</p><p>-Hello, she greeted awkwardly. What about work? Shouldn't you be at it?</p><p>-It's lunch break he showed her his watch.</p><p>-Ah. Right.</p><p>-Would you like to have it with me? He abruptly asked.</p><p>-Ah but you are not…and there is-…she trailed off.</p><p>
  <em>Why is it so awkward? I already knew and I was perfectly fine yesterday.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Or maybe it's because he is staring at me with so much eagerness it's unsettling?</em>
</p><p>-You can propose to Kotonami-san to join us if you want Ren added.</p><p>-But-…</p><p>Kyoko didn't want to force either of them.</p><p>
  <em>They don't really know each other, I don't know if Moko would be up to it.</em>
</p><p>-I don't mind, really he assured.</p><p>-Okay. I'm going to-..to see if she's okay with it, give me a second.</p><p>She quickly sent a message to her friend and waited for her reply.</p><p>And that's how they found themselves all three sitting around with unease at a table in the casual dining room of the hotel.</p><p>-Kotonami-san, would you like some tea or juice? Ren proposed. I'm going to get some drinks and whatever you would like to eat he said standing up.</p><p>-Thanks. Tea is fine her friend answered.</p><p>-Ren, I can-Kyoko rushed to help but he cut in.</p><p>Kanae arched a brow.</p><p>-No way Kyoko. I'm not letting you do it. It's the least I can do and it's really nothing, sit.</p><p>She obeyed with a grumble seeing he wouldn't bulge.</p><p>-Now what would like, Kyoko? He asked with a sparkling smile.</p><p>She sighed.</p><p>-Iced tea if you don't mind.</p><p>They  discussed what they would like to eat then and he left.</p><p>-I'll be right back.</p><p>-What happened to him? Kanae asked. He's glowing.</p><p>-…</p><p>-What? Spill it.</p><p>-I'm not sure actually.</p><p>
  <em>I know what happened last might have alleviated him but to this extend…</em>
</p><p>And what about this new proximity? Kanae demanded changing subject.</p><p>-Hmm? New proximity?</p><p>-Yeah. Since when are you on first name basis?</p><p>-Oh. That.</p><p>-Yeah, that.</p><p>- It's been a month and half I think she replied distracted.</p><p>
  <em>And it's already old news…So much happened after all.</em>
</p><p>-What are you thinking about? You are staring at the buffet like he had offended you.</p><p>-Sorry Moko-san but I need to check something Kyoko muttered and stood up.</p><p>-Check something?</p><p>-Yeah if I don't, he won't get anything for himself.</p><p>She stared at Kyoko.</p><p>-You mean the rumours are true. He really doesn't eat.</p><p>-The rumours are nice compared to reality Kyoko rectified, now excuse me.</p><p>…</p><p>Kanae watched from afar when Kyoko reached the place the man was, the eyes of her friend nearly popping out when she saw there was only a ridiculous half cut apple on his plate and water.</p><p>
  <em>She wasn't lying…How he can be so in shape without eating is a wonder…</em>
</p><p>She entertained herself watching Kyoko filling his tray with food and the man's face paling several shades.</p><p>…</p><p>-How can you eat so little? It's not healthy Kyoko groused while they made their way back to their table.</p><p>-I'm not hungry today that's all.</p><p>-You didn't even eat this morning.</p><p>-…</p><p>-Have pity I won't be able to eat all of that and you know it he whimpered slightly and released the puppy dog look at her with a pitiful expression and Kyoko winced.</p><p>-You don't have to eat everything but a bit of all of it conceded Kyoko beaten.</p><p>He suddenly looked at her with challenge in the corner of the eye and Kyoko turned suspicious.</p><p>-How many bits?</p><p>-You really gonna fight for the bits?</p><p>-How many? He persisted.</p><p>-Ten of each.</p><p>He blanched.</p><p>-Three?</p><p>She gasped in horror and stopped her footing.</p><p>-No less than eight.</p><p>Another puppy came out.</p><p>-Five?</p><p>-No she shakenly stood her ground.</p><p>He pouted.</p><p>-Five?</p><p>-Seven! She said at last.</p><p>-Pretty please he asked with a pout and another puppy.</p><p>-Six bits is my last word. I won't go for any less no matter how pitiful of a look you take. It wouldn't be nutritious enough if it was less.</p><p>He beamed.</p><p>-Okay. Fair bargain.</p><p>Kyoko snorted at that.</p><p>Can I ask you something? Kyoko said suddenly serious.</p><p>-Sure.</p><p>-It concerned you childhood she said in a constricted whisper.</p><p>Ren smiled fondly at her.</p><p>-My answer is still the same. I've nothing to hide and I trust you anyway. Do ask.</p><p>Blushing at his compliment Kyoko breathed out a bit before speaking:</p><p>-I kind of remember Hizuri-san telling mew his charming spouse used to force food into his son's throat when she would judge he didn't eat enough to her taste. Is it the truth? She asked in a mutter.</p><p>-I'm afraid so he replied with an ever paler face.</p><p>-Is it the reason of your traumatism with food? Kyoko demanded.</p><p>-It might be, he laughed a bit at that but I was never a big eater. What? Does this mean you will be more clement now that you know there is trauma behind he interrogated with hope in the voice.</p><p>-You dream. But I understand more why you are so difficult with food.</p><p>They finally reached their table and ate with Kanae under her suspicious eyes observing how closed they had become and how often then man would soften while looking at her friend.</p><p>Her friend though would be a lot more difficult to read at those moments and just that was enough to make it all the more fishy.</p><p>She would grumbled and prodded him to eat with kindness though. And now, they would banter-back like old buddies. It was creeping her out.</p><p>…</p><p>Time passing they would go back to set and before they had noticed the afternoon would finished and soon it was time for Kyoko to get ready to leave.</p><p>-I'm sorry Kanae apologized. I would have gladly seen you off but I still have one scene left tonight.</p><p>-Don't worry. I'm just going to the airport. It's not anything special. And I still need to pick my luggage in my room.</p><p>She waved to the cast and headed out outside, she hadn't tell Ren goodbye but she was still felling oddly silly after yesterday and she knew he was probably busy so she quickly sent a goodbye text and went looking for her bag.</p><p>She was going out of the hotel and calling a taxi when she butted against a familiar chest.</p><p>-A text, really? I hope you didn't seriously think it was okay to leave without a proper goodbye he sullenly prompted looking at her a cropped eyebrow.</p><p>-Sorry. I thought you were busy and I didn't to disturb you.</p><p>-You wouldn't have. I had cleaned this time so I would be able to see you off he explained.</p><p>-You don't need to Ren. I can take a taxi and board by myself you know Kyoko countered with a smile.</p><p>-Please. I want to.</p><p>Troubled by his attention to her but happy she quietly nodded and their caught a taxi to the airport.</p><p>When they reached it Ren escorted her to the departures area.</p><p>When the time came where she needed to leave, Ren turned towards her dramatically and Kyoko felt a knot forming inside of her, constricting her voice and stopping her of talking.</p><p>-Can you text me when you arrived? Demanded Ren.</p><p>Kyoko pinched her lips.</p><p>-Worrying again?</p><p>He just stared at her sternly and she nodded embarrassed.</p><p>Kyoko wiggled under his serious gaze observing her, his eyes lightened in underline with something akin to loneliness.</p><p>
  <em>Now I'm starting to hallucinate things I wished I would see…Damn feelings!</em>
</p><p>Her plane got announced by some guy in the interphone and Kyoko scrambled to think about the right thing to say.</p><p>But all of sudden Ren brushed aside some strand from her hair with the tips of his fingers and she stared back at him.</p><p>-Kyoko, Ren begin in a tenuous voice, I don't have the words right now to tell you…You got me a role, you was there to me several time when I was falling in my own darkness again, you showed how to honour my friend without forbidding me of any joy, you made me understand the truth behind an event that had haunted for years, helped me come to term with it being an accident…</p><p>-You have been my friend and my support countless times…nothing, nothing I could voice aloud would ever compare to the degree the debt I have to you…Nothing could express how dear you are to me right now…</p><p>Kyoko hided her face bending it down, shaking at his words. Touched but frustrated by them.</p><p>
  <em>Idiot man. Don't say that. It's misleading.</em>
</p><p>-So as I don't have the words, I would like to thank you once again. You are a very dear friend to me Ren ended at last with an enchanting smile.</p><p>Fumbling to look anywhere but at him Kyoko mumbled.</p><p>-I-…Okay. No problem and he chuckled at her awkwardness.</p><p>The interphone sound again.</p><p>-I-I will have to go Kyoko uttered at last.</p><p>-I know, he nodded, but can I demand one selfish wish?</p><p>
  <em>Selfish wish?</em>
</p><p>She tilted her head in interrogation.</p><p>-I want a hug, Ren explained.</p><p>Kyoko coloured from head to toes and gaped at him baffled by his audacity.</p><p>He laughed.</p><p>-Is it a "no"?</p><p>-I-…You are serious? She blurted.</p><p>-Please?</p><p>
  <em>Arghh…No…stop that…Don't get out the fallen puppy ears…I forfeit…</em>
</p><p><em>-</em>I forfeit. Okay. Stop. Just stop that miserable cute expression.</p><p>-Really? He grinned.</p><p>-Yeah Kyoko signed in defeat.</p><p>In two steps he was on her. Holding her in those strong arms against him, his head nestled in the hollow of her neck. She tried to talk but her voice muffled by his chest was making it difficult. His strong musky smoked wood slightly honey-suckle aroma scent were intoxicating and the attention he was giving in holding her with strength gentleness was disarming her. In no time, Kyoko had lost any reasons to resist and rested her ear against his broad chest, forgetting everything. Her worries, her desire to run, the need to hide what she felt even her plane she forgot about it.</p><p>She glided her fingers on his back and circled his torso in a tight returning hug.</p><p>For one blessing moment, both were happy, very still and at peace.</p><p>Then a little pop rang at her ear when supple but firm lips tap a little kiss on her right cheek before Ren let go of her.</p><p>-I will miss you Kyoko, Ren told her when he step away.</p><p>Kyoko stood frozen, looking at him wildly before raising the tips of her fingers to her cheek, bewildered.</p><p>-Youuu!! Again!</p><p>-Why?! She half squeaked while she was shifting to tomato hue.</p><p>-It's another thank you Ren while very slowly taking a step back at the view of her burning eyes.</p><p>-Oh really? Again. Now, I know where you manners are coming but still you must do that often,neh? Kyoko growled, infuriated.</p><p>-No. Just with you. My dear childhood friend Kyoko-chan.</p><p>-Oh you damn Corn. How dare you use the sensitive chord right now.</p><p>-It's true he defended a bit vexed.</p><p>
  <em>Oh no. Not this time. I 'm not going to let this go without nothing.</em>
</p><p>-Come here, Ren. I'm going to strangle you before embarking.</p><p>-I'm afraid you don't have time for that Ren said backing away. See, your plane landed, he showed her the front screen for arrivals.</p><p>She approached with obstinacy.</p><p>-Come here Ren.</p><p>Kyoko finally cornered him against a wall.</p><p>-Kyoko, I surrender, please. What you doing to do?</p><p>-Avenge myself Kyoko stated before grasping him by the collar and pulling.</p><p>She kissed him soundly on the left cheek.</p><p>-Take that, mister fairy.</p><p>-I need to go. See you soon Ren.</p><p>She left with a huff leaving being a paralyzed and blushing Ren getting caught in his own trap.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. ~Back at home~ ~New beginnings can be triggered by harsh truths~ part one~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Nakamura sensei does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It has been nearly four weeks since Kyoko had come back in Japan and today was a dreadful day. Lotus in the mud shooting was coming to an end and so she was unfortunately free today.</p><p>In result, she was available for some distressing appointment she had postponed for some time already.</p><p>For some mysterious terrible reasons she was going to see her.</p><p>Her mother.           </p><p>Toudou-san had contacted her for some important matters to be discussed with her mother and Kyoko was dragging her feet to the meeting with growing apprehension.</p><p>Not that she didn't still appreciate to see her but her mother would never contact her on her own to share a good new, she would just find it unnecessary. So, it could only be bad.</p><p>She reached the law office and wondered once more how was Ren. He was still filming that she knew and had news time to time by mails but she it has been nearly a month and a call or a mail weren't the same as seeing him in person.</p><p>She pushed open the door and focused on the task at hand.</p><p>…</p><p> </p><p>She picked the phone with annoyance but when she saw who was calling she put it on speaker eagerly.</p><p>-Morizumi Kimiko speaking.</p><p>-Hi Kimiko-chan. How are you echoed in her room the charming voice of Cedric Bennet.</p><p>-Wonderful Cedric-san she pipped with excitement. I'm so happy you called me. I missed talking to you since I went back in Japan.</p><p>-Haha. Well, I missed our time together as well he said in a sultry voice and Kimiko blushed remembering the sweaty trashy rogue nights at his hotel while she was there. Her, bind at the head-bed, her face stuffed in a pillow choking for grasping air while her legs would be spread wide open, her butt raised in the air and he would shredded her pulsing pleasured bloody pussy apart hammering into her in raging angry lust until she fainted in pained bliss every singled times. It was always more than intense and abusive. She remembered he was quite the aggressive one when lost in his thrill.</p><p>But she liked it. It exhilarated her. And as long as she was with him, she didn't mind the violence. His whims could be virulently exciting.</p><p>Her pants got wet while she was recollecting about it and she tantalizingly spoke:</p><p>-What can I do for you Cedric-san?</p><p>He laughed with pleasure in his tone and whisperingly growled.</p><p>-Oh, you can do a lot of things but right I would gladly like if you could do me a favour and take care of something for me in Japan?</p><p>-Of course. Anything she sweetly answered.</p><p>-Did you hear by any chance about some Mogami Kyoko? He asked with a sickening tone she recognized well and her own voice turned ice cold.</p><p>
  <em>Her. Again.</em>
</p><p>-Yeah. Why?</p><p>-Well, it happened she was on the set I was working on helping a friend as a translator or something but then I supposed she couldn't stand me because-…he trailed off.</p><p>-What did she do? Kimiko asked with burning fury.</p><p>-She got me fired Kimiko-chan. And upset enough my uncle with me for him to cut ties. I'm really feeling trampled he whined to her with a sad tone.</p><p>
  <em>She got fired-…my man! I'm going to butcher her.</em>
</p><p>A dirty black slime viscosity had seized the insides of Kimiko and was growing with the pulsing of her dark heart beating in melting madness.</p><p>-It's completely ridiculous you know Cedric snivelled to her, I'm innocent here. But she was such a crass crazy bitch to me. She accused me of insane things. Like abusing girls or other thin-…</p><p>-I'm at your command. No boundaries or limits. What do I have to do? She cut in in a calm cold determination.</p><p>He giggled sickeningly in the phone.</p><p>-Well, you see, I have a promise to fulfil he explained nonchalantly.</p><p>…</p><p>-It will done, Cedric-san Kimiko promised sweetly again. I hope we will be able to meet soon.</p><p>-Me too Kimiko-chan. Me too. Keep me informed.</p><p>…</p><p> </p><p>When Kyoko stepped in the office, Toudou-san was already there for her and looked oddly anxious while he leaded her to a private room where she found her mother already sitting and waiting.</p><p>Kyoko sat and Toudou-san took the seat beside her mother in front of her.</p><p>-I'm sorry for the impromptu meeting Kyoko-san but we have several matters to discuss.</p><p>Kyoko nodded and listened.</p><p>-You see, though her mother was very private about this issue, some rumours seemed to have leaked, non-sense rumours of all sort but I followed her declaration on TV about not having any child he explained sternly. And though no one can prove that she lied, some seemed to remember about old talk of Mogami-san having a child. For that reason, a decision that I advised was taken.</p><p>-Toudou-san suggested I get married officially with someone to cut any bad press. So that if any proof was to be provided, we could still pretend it was from this person. He suggested I get married to him precisely Saena explained without any expression.</p><p>Kyoko looked at Toudou-san, not fooled the least.</p><p>And for the first time, he dropped his pleasant mask and looked on the side ashamed and with an apological smile directed at her.</p><p>Kyoko frowned in confusion.</p><p>-I see Kyoko said. So to clarify, you are going to marry to Toudou-san so that if proves happened to be given you can say that I'm from you and Toudou-san relationship.</p><p>-That's exact. Another thing. As it has to be an official thing, it won't be too small. But you can imagine you are forbidden to come, of course. I still wish our link won't be revealed in the open if possible.</p><p>
  <em>It's not like I'm surprised…I perfectly understand her reasons…</em>
</p><p>-Of course Kyoko agreed with bitter sadness.</p><p><em>But it still hurts…</em>She thoughts, holding her tears back with a comprehensive smile.</p><p>Toudou-san looked at her with a mixed of pity and shame but Kyoko shook her head, signifying him to just drop it.</p><p>-There is one more matter we need to discuss Kyoko-san Toudou-san added at last.</p><p>Kyoko stared, expecting them to talk and her mother opened her mouth to begin but Toudou-san hold her back.</p><p>-I will do it if it's okay with okay. It needs more tact than you possess.</p><p>-Kyoko-san, Toudou-san began, after the issue of keeping your existence a secret appeared, when the decision of marriage had been made, we didn't want to miss any loop hole, to disregard any future threat on this matter. So we-</p><p>-We searched for you father ended Saena.</p><p>Kyoko gasped.</p><p>Toudou-san looked at her severely and she shut her mouth with a sigh.</p><p>-Yes, Toudou-san resumed, we looked for him. In Kyoko and everywhere in Japan.</p><p>-And? Kyoko asked.</p><p> -We found him, made some analyses and tried to talk to him.</p><p>-It broke my heart what had happened to him Saena suddenly grieved looking on the side with a sad face.</p><p>Toudou-san grimly sighed.</p><p>-That's not the subject, Saena.</p><p>-Why? Kyoko demanded. I mean I understand, he doesn't know me but can't I at least know a little a bit of him? I know he's just my genitor but-</p><p>Toudou-san shook his head.</p><p>-No. Kyoko-san, we were wrong. Though Misonoi-san was your mother's former lover, I'm afraid he's not your genitor.</p><p>-What do you mean? Kyoko questioned, completely lost. I thought I was conceived on-</p><p>-You were conceived around that time but the tests we did confirmed it Kyoko-san.</p><p>-The tests?</p><p>-We did AND tests when we met him. Just to be sure. After all this time and as he changed a lot…Toudou-san trailed off.</p><p>-And? Kyoko asked again.</p><p>-The AND didn't match. You aren't his daughter.</p><p>Kyoko groaned. Her head was fuzzy.</p><p>-But then who? Do you even know mother?! Demanded Kyoko with a bit of anger seeping through her voice.</p><p>Was it not already enough that none of her parents wanted her or that they could hate her? That the betrayal of one caused the hate of the other against her own child? No, now, she was back in the black.</p><p>-Who?! She demanded, he voice raising an octave.</p><p>Toudou-san sighed again and with sad eyes looked at her and replied:</p><p>-We don't know. Saena doesn't remember.</p><p>-I don't remember who it was corrected Saena but though at first there was nothing I could picked back, I got back a blurry memory of the night after learning of Misonoi betrayal, I recollected getting very drunk and ending the night in some stranger's arms, now. It seemed as such an inconsequential moment, such a meaningless thing compared to what happened with Misonoi that I didn't even remember it and of course I thought that he was necessarily your father.</p><p>Kyoko brushed past what she could say about the night of her conception, knowing really well it was pointless and that her mother couldn't help it.</p><p>-Just that? She finally asked.</p><p>Saena shook her head.</p><p>-Not just some stranger as an unknown person but a stranger as in a foreigner, a gai-jin. It's odd really that I didn't remember directly because now that I do, it's so obvious.</p><p>Kyoko rubbed her temples feeling a headache coming.</p><p>
  <em>Her genitor was a foreigner…that's the palm of everything…</em>
</p><p>Not that she had anything against foreigners; she was in love with one. No, but for her very conservative mother, that was really unexpected and quite ironic.</p><p>-What do you mean? Why is it so obvious? She asked after a moment.</p><p>-Because the only other I remember from that night is the eyes of this man and there were this sick caramel-gold colour. Which it's pretty rare. Plus you don't resemble Misonoi at all. I should have seen it right away.</p><p>-I see Kyoko dully concluded. I suppose thank you for telling me all of this.</p><p>-Yes, you should Saena agreed hardly when she saw the distraught look on her face.</p><p>-Saena! No, she shouldn't. Kyoko-san. It was you right to know. You had the right to be aware of the truth but I can understand what a burden it is to learn. So, no. I just hope you will be able to digest it without too much difficulty Toudou-san sympathised with a warm but guilty expression while giving her the papers involving the tests taken.</p><p>Kyoko smiled kindly at him but couldn't look her mother in the eyes right now. She still loved her but she was feeling a bit sick by all of it.</p><p>-Thank you Toudou-san for your thoughtfulness and kindness Kyoko gratefully said while taking the papers and standing up. Thanks mother. I won't spell a word of anything. Now, if you would excuse me, I have work to do.</p><p>She left.</p><p>Her head in a bit of mess. Sad but also thankful for their honesty.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>First harsh one done. Sorry, the next one is even darker. <br/>By the way, there might be four rather than three but it will become sweeter again.<br/>Hope you will still like it. <br/>Don't kill me.<br/>It's necessary to the plot.<br/>Kisses. See you soon</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. ~New beginnings can be ignited by horrendous events~ part two~point-one.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Nakamura Yoshiki does.</p><p>Dark, abusing ahead.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been two weeks.</p><p>Two weeks since her mother announced she was going to marry Toudou-san and that she wouldn't be invited, of course.</p><p>Two weeks since Kyoko had learned her father wasn't Misonoi-san. But some foreigner recognisable by the characteristic eyes he apparently shared with his daughter.</p><p>Kyoko had been rattled for a few days after that. She was still a bit.</p><p>She wasn't blaming her mother, it was cold and a bit cruel but it made sense knowing her. Kyoko couldn't really hold it against her.</p><p>No, she had been far more shocked at the discovery of her father being someone else than Misonoi-san. It wasn't like Kyoko was really hoping to meet her father some day or that he, whoever he was, would like or be interested in her. No, she knew better.</p><p>But, even if Misonoi-san had done disputable things, being in the capacity to put a name on her genitor was like an unknown piece that had been missing inside of Kyoko was finally put into place, finally appearing. She didn't want anything from Misonoi-san even when she thought he was her father.</p><p>All that matter was to be able to have a name. To understand.</p><p>She got people could be really imperfect and she had enough comprehension to understand perfectly well that she wasn't the kind of child a person could desire to have or meet. She could fathom that a person had made mistakes in his life. Furthermore, a child could be never an option for some people.</p><p>So, she didn't, hadn't expected anything to begin with.</p><p>But to understand. To have the knowledge of where you were from. Why those people couldn't do it. Why couldn't they be parents. Why couldn't they be loving. Why they couldn't be there. Why wasn't she right for them? What happened to them? What mistakes did they do that made them who they are?</p><p>To have the consciousness of who the people that put you into the world are and the reasons that made them like that, even if it's mean they won't ever be able to be how you wish they were, to be loving arms, reassuring words; to be happiness, family: Simply your closes ones. Even in the cases of you can't stand them or they can't stand you…</p><p>To have this knowledge is infinitely precious insight of where you're from of what are your roots.</p><p>And now…                                                        </p><p><em>I'm in the dark again…I don't want anything special…no bonding…no special treatment…no gifts…that person wouldn't even needs to know I exist…</em>Kyoko thought with kindness<em>. I don't want to break any family because I would have been nosy by inadvertence…</em></p><p>
  <em>I just wish I knew a name…a simple name is more than enough…</em>
</p><p>The heart beating a bit emptily in her chest, Kyoko sighed.</p><p>
  <em>We don't have everything we wish for unfortunately…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I will just have to get use to it…</em>
</p><p>She knew she would eventually manage even if now it was still a raw.</p><p>
  <em>It will just take a bit more times…As some I had let raise my hopes up…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko got out of LME buildings and shook off the bad feelings. She grabbed her bike and started heading back home.</p><p>
  <em>That's right. Ren is back. Let's focus on that.</em>
</p><p>Yashiro-san was busy managing Ren's schedule precisely because of that as Ren has just came back a few days ago and so Yashiro-san wasn't available to drive her off right and left for the next ten days. Yashiro-san had profusely apologized and even proposed to rent someone else for that time but she had declined, embarrassed at the simple notion. She had understood, it was totally normal of the priority was set on Ren's schedule. He didn't even have to apologize.</p><p> But it was the reason why she had been riding her bike again since a two days ago.</p><p>Honestly, she didn't understand the president. She knew her popularity was slowly rising but she was still very unknown by the public. Kyoko didn't find it fair to borrow such a famous manager as Yashiro-san anyway.</p><p>
  <em>I don't deserve it…Yet.</em>
</p><p>Plus, Yashiro-san was far more useful to Ren. She was really feeling like she was imposing on them by sharing Yashiro-san with Ren.</p><p>
  <em>It must complicate their life quite a bit.</em>
</p><p>She was feeling ashamed.</p><p>
  <em>I must do my upmost to burden them the least possible…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Mhmm…Maybe if there an occasion I can ask the president if I really need a manager and propose to see when I would really need one.</em>
</p><p>For now, Yashiro-san should be focused on Ren, anyway.</p><p>Kyoko decided she had made her decision when she turned at the left on the little alley going to the backside of the Daruyama.</p><p>She hopped off her bike when all of sudden a dull sound resonated and she saw stars. Next instant, a cloth was pressed against her nose and the curtain of her sight fell back in her eyes before losing consciousness and she heard a sickening familiar cackle.</p><p>Everything faded away.</p><p> </p><p>When she woke up, Kyoko tried to move. First her fingers, then her legs but next came her head and when she attempted to shift it, it pounded and jangles heavily and she painfully stopped the bile in her throat and resisted throwing up. Her head was crushing her conscience making her mind foggy and unable to think and her stomach nauseous.</p><p>Kyoko couldn't see anything, it was too dark but a gruesome smell was coming from somewhere near and seemed horribly familiar with sewer odours. This time she did vomit and oddly enough her puke didn't hit the ground until a little splash echoed further down and rushing water made its existence known when Kyoko suddenly paid attention to it.</p><p>Hoping to reach a wall or something Kyoko scrambled as much as she could in her state to the back and ache shot throw her left arm when she pushed on it.</p><p>-Ouch.</p><p>Then she heard sickening snorts behind her and slowly, very slowly turned around. But quietness answered to her.</p><p>But she knew she had heard it.</p><p>But it was useless, Kyoko couldn't see anything. It was as dark as in a hole.</p><p>Until a car noise occurred in a not so far distance above her and then faint dime lightened up sparsely the place and Kyoko discovered she was in a downstream short tunnel partially hidden from the higher grounds levels of the city that was allowing direct access to some part of the sewage.</p><p>
  <em>So that's where came the smell…</em>
</p><p>To Kyoko's Horror, it wasn't the only thing she discovered under the tunnel unfortunately.</p><p>There, four meters from, stood three concealed men and farther, at the other side of the tunnel, Kyoko also spotted a lot shorter and feminine build.</p><p>
  <em>Escape!</em>
</p><p>Feeling the danger and listening only to her instinct Kyoko tried to run.</p><p>
  <em>-Now!</em>
</p><p>But for an obscure reason, her legs wouldn't move. They were so numbed Kyoko could barely feel them.</p><p>She attempted to push on her arms and it's at this instant Kyoko noticed the blood running out from her arms, from some deeps wounds at both of her forearms.</p><p>And strangely, she only feels the pain in the left arm. The right one was as numb as her legs.</p><p>Kyoko looked back desperately and saw that the men were closer to her. About two meters from her.</p><p>She could now see they were snickering with dark desires while looking at her and were feeling positively giddy about it.</p><p>A cold but feminine voice echoed in the tunnel when she cackled.</p><p>-Do it, the voice said, but remember no pictures. It would be too obvious she didn't want this and hadn't consented to it.</p><p>Terror rose inside Kyoko and she crawled back further.</p><p>The men nodded silently and advanced to Kyoko when the feminine figure disappeared and Kyoko had absolutely no doubt of what was to come when she saw the faces and the bulges just below their waists.</p><p> </p><p>The next instants would only be excruciating pain and though she fought and even managed to hurt them, she was just not strong enough.</p><p> Tears gulped back in rage and sorrow because she wouldn't gave them the honour when after a while they eventually won.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Soooo….Don't kill me, please.<br/>I had warned it would be dark, very dark.<br/>But not very long.	<br/>As you can see I'm not describing it.<br/>I wanted to show another aspect of this sort of dreadful event that can sometimes happen unfortunately to lot of people. But I didn't want to take the view of THIS being an end. I wanted to show my take at what can do the people that went through that. <br/>Because if there is one person that can show us you can survive, it's surely your strong Kyoko. I didn't want to make of that sort of event when It's happening, a big deal. Because giving too much important to exactly what happened it's like giving too much importance of the abusers and giving the scene to them. When it concern abuse, no matter how far it went, it's still wrong. S	o I didn't want to focus on the event itself.<br/> But  on the real big deal: how you will raise again.<br/>think the worst is passed.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. New beginning can be ignited by horrendous events-part 3-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>o first of all. I'm sorry it hurt so much of you that I took this path. Just know that I didn't take it rashly or to make dramatic or something like that. I had serious reasons to address this. I unfortunately can't explain it right now without disclosing too much of my future plot. Still, as I said in the post-script of the last chapter. This darker part isn't the point of the story but just one hurdle, one, one hardship that Kyoko will met. Ah, it doesn't necessarily mean there would lots and lots of them, just that, you know, in life, a person often meet several trials along his life. Not all of them are dark, or bad or even hard to overcome. But there are trials, always, in life. <br/>And that will be one of them for Kyoko. I don't plan to make a dark story for now on, I'm still planning to go on romance, evolving and sometimes angst. But not too dark.<br/>Warning: you are about to read a scene depicting in one way or another something related to sexual assault or the aftermath of it, if you don't want to, skip to the next bold line stating the end of the scene.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>finished the darkest part</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <strong>Warning: you are about to read a scene depicting in one way or another something related to sexual assault or the aftermath of it, if you don't want to, skip to the next bold line stating the end of the scene.</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Kyoko didn't know how much time she stayed there, immobile on the concrete, under the tunnel but her left arm hurt like an infuriating hell and her right arm was waking up though the pain sensibly less potent. Her head backward to watch the feeble light coming from the night sky at the end of one side of the tunnel she was bothered by the humid pavement which felt cold and a bit uncomfortable under her naked legs.</p><p>She twitched in realisation.        </p><p>
  <em>My legs. I can feel my legs.</em>
</p><p>But why? One hour ago, she couldn't. And why her left arm had been nearly the only thing she still could feel at that time? It didn't make sense.</p><p>A chill ran down her uncovered body.</p><p>
  <em>It's cold. Very cold.</em>
</p><p>Her thoughts escaped her.</p><p>She couldn't remember why she had to move. Why couldn't she stay there until the end of time?</p><p>But-</p><p>Somehow she knew.</p><p>She knew she couldn't. Couldn't stay there. She had to move.</p><p>Time passed. Without disruption or relevance to her.</p><p>Tingling erupted at the surface of her legs little by little as cold progressed and seized her.</p><p>She had to find the force to move. She couldn't remember why but it was important.</p><p>Slowly, slowly. She thought about it. The idea twirling and twirling in her numb mind until she materialised the thought into action and her toes stirred.</p><p>After several tentative, she managed to push against her right arm until she was nearly sitting.</p><p>One thing after another, she focused on one thought at a time.</p><p>
  <em>It's too cold. I can't get colder.</em>
</p><p>Again, through trembling moves, she pushed until the idea make her members move and holding her aching left arm against her torso, she grabbed the bundle of her jeans at her ankles and attempted to cover herself again.</p><p>Her breath was harsh, ragged, every effort tiring her and making her bump her harmed other appendage for each time she rolled up her jeans a bit more on her half-numb legs.</p><p>Eventually though, her jeans were finally encasing her legs and she clutched her jacket around her with one arm and tried to zip it up.</p><p>Finally dressed, she drew near her legs to her chest and rested her forehead on her knees and sighed, exhausted.</p><p>Again; time elapsed. Without her awareness of it.</p><p>She lift the chin and observed cars after cars driving by on the road at the out and above of the tunnel.</p><p>Shivering more and more violently, she waveringly stood, pushing with unease on her finally awoken legs.</p><p>She made one step. And another. And again.</p><p>And wobbling at each move she achingly made her way to the road, scrambling to half-climb-half-crawl the incline to reach the road.</p><p>She watched the vehicles passing by for a while, lost in oblivion until the pain at her left arm made itself more present again and she looked at it with wonder. It was bleeding. A lot. It wasn't running in an overflowing way though. More like a steady drop-pattern. Drop.</p><p>Drop. Drop. Drop.</p><p>She tilted her head. It seemed like an open-wound.</p><p>One that could infect itself if not sew back.</p><p>Right. It needed stitching.</p><p>A new thought to focus on. As long as she didn't think about the past, she would be okay.</p><p>She needed stitches.</p><p>
  <em>Stitches.</em>
</p><p>She turned her head from sides to sides and its start to pound.</p><p>She tried again but just attempted to whistle a car.</p><p>No success either. Her vocal cords didn't seem to want to work right now.</p><p>No other option at hand, she raised her right arm in the air in hope someone would see it.</p><p>But minutes ticked by and this arm though less hurts was still going to tire itself pretty fast.</p><p>Giving up, she resigned herself to walk when a cab suddenly pulled up on the road side just a few meters away from her.</p><p>She achieved to cross the distance separating her from the car and her wobbling legs gave out a bit when she finally reached it and laid her hand on the passage door of the backside. She supported her on the cab door and arduously opened the door with her fingers before crawling inside and sprawled her worn out body on the backseat.</p><p>The driver looked anxiously at her.</p><p>-Are you okay, miss?</p><p>-Just tired she managed to get out after a minute, shaking tremendously.</p><p>He scrutinized her with growing worry and his eyes bulged out of his orbits when he saw her bleeding.</p><p>She grimaced a constricted  smile and breathed out:</p><p>-Cou-…could you bring me-..to the hos-..hospital, please?</p><p>-Right away, miss the driver said with panic edging in his voice and the car kicked off as it was on fire.</p><p>…</p><p>When she reached the hospital, she dragged herself on her painful legs on the parking lot until she saw the emergency section. Though her low members were finally and oddly back to function, they hurt a lot now that they were awoke. She had inspected them and did not see wounds or blood but in her fuzzy mind she could have missed something.</p><p>When she entered the facility, she supported herself on a wall and closed her eyes for a second. Her legs were functioning but they were sore and it strained them to move, her left arm was really starting to go evil and her head was pounding strongly and she couldn't figure out why.</p><p>She was starting to fall asleep in this position when someone came to bother her.</p><p>After that, it was a bit blurry.</p><p>She recollected being conducted to a bed hospital, being exanimated, getting more than half a dozen stitches on the left arm and two on her right, getting a perfusion for a short time then it being removed and getting a shot from another needle.</p><p>The rest was lost in comes and go in the form of white hospital blouses.</p><p>But after a little more time, her mind begin to clear up and she realised she was able to focus again.</p><p>It wasn't an happy realisation though as everything that happened came back to her and she vomited in the trashcan.</p><p>-I see someone emerged from her daze spoke a doctor when he came in. The adrenaline shot seemed to have worked.</p><p>He put a light in her eyes and observed her closely for a while.</p><p>-Can you tell me what happened or what do you remember of it? The doctor softly demanded.</p><p>Kyoko turned her head aside and the doctor brought his hand to her shoulder to make her turn back to him.</p><p>She jumped in the air in terror.</p><p>-DON'T TOUCH ME!</p><p>He raised his hands in appeasement and looked at her with renew softness.</p><p>-Okay. I won't. Now, can you tell me?</p><p>She shook her head.</p><p>The clinician sighed.</p><p>-Do you know you had been drugged?</p><p>Kyoko turned to him with interrogation.</p><p>He smiled, glad he had her attention focus of something and explained.</p><p>-When you came, your two arms are wounds that needed stitching, your legs were operation oddly, your nose was bleeding and you were like absent. Barely conscious of your environment, of where you were. Did someone make you aspirated something? Nose or mouth.</p><p>Kyoko shook her head, ready to negate when her face crinkled in concentration.</p><p>-I think…it might have happened. Someone put a cloth on my nose.</p><p>The doctor nodded, at least reassured she didn't have any hidden illness that caused the bleeding of the nose.</p><p>-Do you know what it was?</p><p>She didn't know and she told him so.</p><p>-After a nurse saw you, we took you to stitch you back, gave you sugar by intravenous and we did a blood test, it's the normal procedure. We don't have every details of it of course, it would take more days but drugs are something easily detectable in blood. You had traces of Ketamine.</p><p>-I- don't know what it does mumble Kyoko.</p><p>The doctor sat on a chair at the other side of a room.</p><p>-Well, it does can provoke bleeding nose. But it's the nicest symptom of all. You can also have trouble talking.</p><p>Kyoko blinked.</p><p>-I see it rang a bell. With high dose you can also experiment dissociation and the disappearing of corporal sensations. You can feel like you aren't in your body anymore.</p><p>-What exactly does it mean? She asked in a mix of furore and fear even if she kind of already knew.</p><p>-It means you can troubles in motors function like moving your members, you can feel paralyzed. Did you experience any of those symptoms?</p><p>Kyoko nodded feebly, her eyes large with recognition of those.</p><p>
  <em>That's why my legs were paralyzed…</em>
</p><p>-Well, the good new if with time passing and the adrenaline shot, the drug must not have any effect anymore, now. But you might feel a bit stiff for a few more hours and I would like to keep you for a few days if-</p><p>-No!</p><p>She couldn't stay. She didn't to stay here in this building full of strangers. She had to leave.</p><p>-Young girl, you just experienced a traumatism and you are wounded, you should take it easy and-</p><p>-No repeated Kyoko. Please she asked.</p><p>
  <em>And even if I wanted to, I don't have the money for a stay in…</em>
</p><p>-Fine the doctor reluctantly agreed. But you're going to stay another hour at least and then you will sign me a release statement.</p><p>She nodded vigorously and her head pounded again.</p><p>-You need to rest. You will have painkillers for your arms and head, creams and dressing changes provided when you will leave.</p><p>-Okay.</p><p>The doctor turned to leave but Kyoko hold him.</p><p>-Doctor, could I see some gynaecologist please? Kyoko demanded shaking wildly and already regretting to have asked.</p><p>-I will send you one right away the clinician answered with pitiful eyes staring at her and Kyoko shifted her gaze again.</p><p>
  <em>I shouldn't have asked. I don't want to talk. I don't even want to think about it.</em>
</p><p>But-…The only idea I could…</p><p>
  <em>If I were to get an illness from those men…I couldn't forgive myself…</em>
</p><p>Bile rose again and Kyoko contained another bout of nausea. But barely.</p><p>She waited anxiously, only thinking about the person she would meet to no think about something else.</p><p>Fifteen minutes later a middle-aged woman with wrinkles everywhere on the face and a warm compassionate expression came in before closing the door.</p><p>-Hi miss.</p><p>-Hi.</p><p>-Yadehi-sensei said you wanted to see me she said. What can I do for you? She very gently asked.</p><p>Quaking violently in remembrance, Kyoko breathed in and out a few times and before getting discouraged just dropped the words at the woman doctor feet:</p><p>-I was raped.</p><p>The woman nodded.</p><p>-We are going to proceed a battery of tests if you are okay with it but first I need you to answer some questions.</p><p>-I don't want to talk about it Kyoko whispered.</p><p>-You won't have to. No directly at least. From your wounds only, I can already conclude there was violence. And the first test showed someone drugged you. I have only three questions that can be answered on a paper I will give to you later.</p><p>Kyoko replied to the two first ones diligently though a bit detached but then came the last one.</p><p>-Do you know if protection was used?</p><p>Kyoko opened her mouth to answer but couldn't find anything to say.</p><p>-I-do..n't-...kn..ow. It's too blurred but I wouldn't be able to tell anyway she admitted. I didn't h-</p><p>-You didn't have previous experience.</p><p>She nodded weakly.</p><p>-My poor thing. Do you mind if I sit with you?</p><p>She shook the head and the gynaecologist sat near her.</p><p>-If I'm acting this question it's because there is pro and cons depending on your reply.</p><p>Confused Kyoko looked at her and the woman took her in a light hug.</p><p>-You see, if protection was used and correctly, the risks of sexual illnesses or pregnancy would be nearly void but if there wasn't protection, there is a lot more chance to identify the bastards who did this.</p><p>Kyoko nodded understanding the issue.</p><p>-So?</p><p>-So explained the doctor, beside the other tests, I need to take a smear.</p><p>Kyoko's eyes grew in fear but she finally replied:</p><p>-Only if it's you.</p><p>-Okay then. . And when you will come back, bring me the clothes you are currently wearing. Don't wash them.</p><p>One more hour passed until all the tests were eventually done. It was two in the morning.</p><p>-You will need to come back in three weeks to check some things and removed your stitches said doctor Yadehi while giving her a package with meds and dressing changes.</p><p>-There is also a number added the doctor seeing Kyoko observing the package and waiting for her to raise her head. Once that done he continued:</p><p>-If you want to talk to someone.</p><p>
  <strong>End of warning( </strong>
  <strong>there might other warnings later, hope the little bit left from this chapter is okay to be out of the warnings)</strong>
</p><p>She nodded distantly and left the hospital.</p><p>She couldn't stand the crowd any more minute. She was feeling more and more anxious and felt like someone was creeping around all the time.</p><p>Too much people, too much strangers, too much danger.</p><p>She got out as quickly as she could and got drenched instantly. It was pouring heavily outside and the cold came back. And with it, the bad memories.</p><p>Kyoko tried to hail a cab under the curtain of rain and after a while, one finally saw her sign and stopped near her. She climbed in sloppily and let her body dropped on the backseat once again.</p><p>She knew she shouldn't do that. It was half past two.</p><p>But she did.</p><p>She gave an address.</p><p>…</p><p>When the cab halted in front of the private basement, her stress had grown exponentially on the duration of the drive. Countless thoughts had been running around for the first part of it all circling around the idea she was going to be a bother.</p><p>But then-</p><p> She had felt dizzy again and her brain shifted in a renew haze. The pain was also resurfacing in every parts of her body and she supposed the effects of the painkillers and adrenaline were dissipating.</p><p>She hold her disgruntling arm against her drenched figure with the help of a sling and extricated herself from the narrow backseat.</p><p>-Miss? Called out the driver. The money, please.</p><p>She stared at him, lost.</p><p>-I know you just get out of hospital but I would like to be paid.</p><p>Realisation hit her and she started to bow in apology until she got nauseous again and stopped.</p><p>
  <em>Focus! Focus! You can break later. Tomorrow maybe. Focus!</em>
</p><p>-I'm sorry sir. I lost my wallet in some events, I think. Can you make me a bill and an account I will pay later.</p><p>The driver frowned then sighed and eased a bit.</p><p>-I'm sorry miss. I can see you are not in your right mind and you went through a lot but my company doesn't allow me that.</p><p>Kyoko relied on the car's side again. That was too much.</p><p>
  <em>My brain can't seem to understand completely. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>I don't like it…But I don't have much of a choice.</em>
</p><p>-I-I-I'm going to see someone. In there, Kyoko pointed the sombre modern high building. I can ask him an-.. ad-vance and pay you…If you can wait a bit.</p><p>The driver agreed.</p><p>But when she got inside, she crossed path with the security guard and hesitated for a second.</p><p>
  <em>I could rather ask him.</em>
</p><p>But then, his phone rang and she gave up.</p><p>She made it through the parking lot and proceeded into the hall.</p><p>
  <em>No more. I just want to sleep…But I can't.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The monsters are lurking in the dark ready to jump at my mind if I get weak.</em>
</p><p>The night wouldn't come to an end and her members were shaking under the effort she pulled to stay standing and conscious.</p><p>Only one think remained in her mind: To attain the door.</p><p>She dragged her body forward, trembling step after step. The cold had seeped through her wet clothes and her toes felt numb, her vision was becoming darker and little stars danced in front of her pupils for an instant.</p><p>She misstep and hit the wall on the right but didn't even bother correcting her standing and slide her body heavily on it while she advanced, encouraged only by her goal coming closer.</p><p>When Kyoko was finally in front of the door, her body banged on it and she made one last effort to knock and ring at it.</p><p>
  <em>Safe…soon…I'll be safe.</em>
</p><p>The door creaked open.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. New beginnings first need balm on fresh wounds</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ren peacefully asleep in his bed awoke when a loud bang resonated inside his flat. His eyes flew open. He turned his head on the pillow and stretched his neck backward to glimpse at his alarm. The luminescence of the screen blinded his eyes a bit but the hour was blatantly clear.</p><p>
  <em>What could possibly want someone at three o'clock in the morning?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me sleep… What an undue hour to wake up neighbours…</em>
</p><p>Putting his head under the pillow, he intended to ignore it and return to a needed rest. The comfy that provided his bed was slowly lulling him back when several knocks followed. He groaned.</p><p>
  <em>Pretty please…                                  </em>
</p><p>The bell rang and he gave up. Still laying on his stomach, he stretched his long legs toward the end of the bed and pushed his upper body up to extended his arms in the air. Sitting, he swiftly rotated his legs to the side and put his bare feet on the plush carpet.</p><p>
  <em>Maybe it's important…</em>
</p><p>Yawning profusely, Ren stood barefoot and padded in his quiet feline way to the door.</p><p>Holding the knob in his hand, he unlocked the latch suddenly suspicious and tried to ajar the door when the weight of something pushed open the door and fell into him and soaked him with its dampness.</p><p>He caught it instinctively and paled when he realised what it was or rather who it was, one second later.</p><p>-Kyoko!</p><p>…</p><p>She had been resting at the door for a few minutes now, hoping she would just fall asleep and forget everything when her support had suddenly vanished in the air and her right shoulder had inclined in the beginning of a falling process. But something had stopped her and her body met a very smooth hard surface.</p><p>The fragrance was really calming and she found herself losing all senses of surroundings when it turned out the something was also really pliant as proven when it instinctually flexed around her and surrounded her.</p><p>She was barely awake when the thing started to scream.</p><p>-Too loud…she groaned.</p><p>-Kyoko! Exclaimed again the fantastically comfy thing. Thanks god, you're conscious. What happened? Kyoko? Please stay conscious!</p><p>She didn't answer lulled by as she was by the heady rumble of his chest when he was talking. But she was rudely pulled back from her makeshift cushion.</p><p>-Kyoko the thing threatened severely but with odd tremors in the voice while shaking her very so slightly; if you don't talk to me right this instant I'm bringing you to the hospital in the next two minutes.</p><p>She blinked repeatedly at the thing, wondering why it was so familiar until the threat hit her brain and brought back a semblance of focus; her eyes recognized the face she was staring at and she strained her lips in a tired smile.</p><p>-Don't bother, Kyoko mumbled in a yawn and holding most of her weight on his arms. I'm coming from there.</p><p>-You what?!</p><p>Kyoko scrambled to think about something to tell him.</p><p>-I had a kind of an accident.</p><p>…</p><p>-An accident? What kind of accident, Kyoko?</p><p>Ren stared at her with frantic eyes. She was drenched from head to toes, the water dripping from her hands and clothes to make a pool on his carpet, her hairs were sticking to her face that looked so aghast her lips were nearly white. Her left arm was in a sling. She had bruises here and there; a bad one near the temple and on her left cheek then around her neck a blue-purple circle was appearing. She was trembling irrepressibly and couldn't stand on her own and was only supporting herself upright because she was relying on him.</p><p>She seemed to have gone through hell and back he thought dimly but the most unsettling part for Ren in all of this the agonizing gaze she was trying to hide behind nonchalance.</p><p>
  <em>God…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…What in the world happened to you…</em>
</p><p>He observed her quietly while trying to remain calm but his lips shivered in renew panic when he caught something white peeking out from under her vest sleeves. Kyoko followed his sight and sighed.</p><p>-It's nothing special she hastily said, I-hum-I tried to avoid a car and fell and I managed to open my forearms a bit.</p><p>Ren's eyes expanded so much he thought they were going to fell and his hands then started to shake.</p><p>-It was to that point? You opened yourself up?</p><p>She blinked again like she was making a lot of effort to concentrate and answered.</p><p>-It's no big deal, Ren. I'm patched up, all stitches and all. Nothing to worry anymore.</p><p>He looked doubtfully at her, not believing a word. When there was really something going on or that happened, it always then you have to be cautious because she won't say a word of it.</p><p>
  <em>Count on this girl to close up tightly when it's serious…</em>
</p><p>-Kyoko, you don't seem so good and it's three in the morning. Let me be sceptical on the fact it's really no big deal.</p><p>-I'm fine really she smile nearly cheerfully. Don't turn in worrywart mode she said with a teasing tired smile. I'm just tired.</p><p>
  <em>Maybe I'm worrying for nothing after all.</em>
</p><p>-Okay.</p><p>He was going to propose her to get her dry and ask her what he could do for her then when she mumbled something.</p><p>-I didn't catch that, can you repeat.</p><p>She bent her head against his chest and started again:</p><p>-As I said, I'm fine really but I would like to ask you a favour, if you don't mind. I'm sorry, I'm sure it will bother you but could I-could I-…She trailed off and sighed.</p><p>-Tell me Kyoko. What can I do? And you don't bother me at all. Her quakes worsened and he hurriedly took her back in his embrace and Kyoko gripped at the backside of his blouse. <em>She's frigid.</em></p><p>
  <em>I need to take care of her quickly…She's going to get sick at this rate…</em>
</p><p>She stood back to look at him and desperately stared at him with the most pleading eyes he had ever been victim of.</p><p>-Could I-Could I stay the night, Ren?</p><p>-S-Sure.</p><p>He responded automatically, not even thinking. Not even blinking. Being absolutely defenceless against that sort of lethal weapon.</p><p>
  <em>Now…that was dangerous eyes…dangerous adorable golden eyes…</em>
</p><p>-I know I'm being a bother and it's late and I'm troubling your sleep but-but-…</p><p>He tenderly brushed aside a lock of damp hair. <em>So cute.</em></p><p>
  <em>As if I could refuse you anything anymore…I'm far past that…</em>
</p><p>-But what?</p><p>-I would like to be safe she whispered in a quiet but deeply frightened tone but Ren heard her alright and he nearly stumbled back.</p><p><em>Don't get excited </em>Ren admonished himself.</p><p>-And I'm safe? He asked with an amused tone though also worried by amount of fear she had just displayed.</p><p>-Yup she affirmed tiredly but with irrevocable faith in her beautiful eyes.</p><p>His grip on tightened unconsciously. It was getting ridiculous really, the mere notion that she felt like he was a safe place to go overjoyed him to a point his heartbeat run riot in his ribcage and he hoped Kyoko couldn't hear it.</p><p>
  <em>That's an unfair attack Kyoko.</em>
</p><p>-I'm honoured to hear that. And of course you can stay. You have to be pretty shaken.</p><p>But his joy collapsed as suddenly as it had risen. An accident? She said she had an accident. But would an accident really make you feel so unsafe you couldn't stay at your house? Future fear of cars and roads would make more sense, not wanting to get out of the home maybe…</p><p>
  <em>But this…This looks like she's afraid of something lurking in the shadows…Plus she's so rarely afraid of anything…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Something definitively happened…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko nodded and smiled with great relief to his former remark and he turned back his attention to the outside world.</p><p>-We should find some- he began but was startled when Kyoko's legs gave out and she fell from his arms.</p><p>-Kyoko!</p><p>Ren caught her just before she touched the ground and he pushed her back to a standing position, holding her by the waist and getting more and more suspicious.</p><p>-Sorry. My legs are tired and a bit numbed she explained with sombre expression.</p><p>-Hmmm…he commented vaguely.</p><p>
  <em>There is more…I could swear it wasn't a simple accident…</em>
</p><p>But first thing first.</p><p>He drew his left arm around her legs and cautiously lifted her up in his arms until her head could rest on the high crook of his neck. She didn't even protest. Just circled his head with arms, her shakes decreasing a bit though.</p><p><em>It's not normal…no resistance …no propriety speech…not even an embarrassed blush…</em>Ren thought perplexed by her lack of reaction.</p><p>-No protest? Ren tried.</p><p>She sighed and glued herself to him.</p><p>-You are warm she murmured.</p><p>
  <em>I'm really getting worried…</em>
</p><p>Watching her, he furrowed his brow and sighed with concern. Something was really fishy. He didn't even remember a day where she has been so passive.</p><p>
  <em>I like being close to her but compared to this, I think I would even prefer for her to lecture me than being close but her being in this state…</em>
</p><p>He caressed her hair absent-mindedly and tightened his hold on her little form and she clang to him like he was a lifeline.</p><p>
  <em>Her combativity …it's like it's inexistent…</em>
</p><p>-We are going to warm yourself up and find you dry clothes Ren said after another moment of musing.</p><p>She hummed feebly and the unease Ren felt grow.</p><p><em>It's like she's not really there…</em>he thought while his long strides brought them to his bathroom.</p><p>
  <em>…Like she's just in survival mode…</em>
</p><p>Inside Ren tried to reach through her drowsiness.</p><p>-Do you think yourself capable of a wash to warm you up before putting other clothes?</p><p>She didn't answer.</p><p>-Kyoko? Kyoko?! He asked louder. A bath. Do you think you could take one?</p><p>It seemed to echo in her because she finally mumbled:</p><p>-A bath?</p><p>-Yes. A warm bath. With bubbles Ren prodded. Is it tempting?</p><p>She nodded with for the first time a bit of eagerness.</p><p>-Can you do it by yourself? Asked Ren. I don't mind helping you but I wouldn't want to intrude Ren hastily said.</p><p>-I can-…do it she protested with a shake of the head.</p><p>-Okay. Give me a minute. I'm going to run a bath for you.</p><p>Ren hold her against him with one hand and turned on the tap with hot water. He then fumbled in his own stash of salts bath, bubbles bath gels and aromatics plants bath having a weakness for those sorts of things.</p><p>Kyoko looked at him oddly then at his abundant supply then at him again and bit her bottom lip as to refrain a tired smile.</p><p>He selected rosemary and lavender for the plants, lavender salt and finally alga marine for the bubble soap flagrance. He inspected them to be sure they still smell good and breathed deeply at the aromas emerging from the contents. <em>All good. It's still very fresh and fine. The lavender should help her to relax. </em></p><p>He put some shampoo and classic soap on the side of the tub and when the bathtub was filled by half he added the bubble gel in it and by two thirds he added the salts and plants. All the while working with only one hand available.</p><p>-Your bath is ready, milady Ren declared after testing the water with his wrist.</p><p>Kyoko stared at the light violet water from which delightful odours came then turned to Ren.</p><p>-You sure? It looks like you just made a potion in a big big cauldron and you're planning to drop me in it to cook me and eat me.</p><p>Ren's mouth breached for a second perplexed at the absurd notion. Then he exploded violently, menacing the precarious position he held Kyoko in with his laughs.</p><p>-Do I look like a maleficent evil witch that eat people? Ren asked with an arched intrigued brow after calming down a bit.</p><p>-It's just this cauldron of a bathtub that is very mysterious and intimidating; you put so many things in it that it looked like you were flavouring it.</p><p>He chuckled again.</p><p>-Well I usually don't cook in my bathtub, you can rest assured. Plus, I don't eat most of the time, you know it, unless forced he added with a smile to her so there is really no need to worry.</p><p>-Hummm Kyoko emitted putting back her head against him.</p><p>-There are only salts, plants like rosemary and lavender and bubble bath.</p><p>She shivered with cold but still replied in an incoherent murmur:</p><p>-Two of the three are used in cooking…</p><p>Ren shook his head and Kyoko added like she was talking to herself:</p><p>-More and more suspicious.</p><p>Ren slowly detached himself from him and put her on the side of the tub.</p><p>-You should go in before it gets cold.</p><p>She nodded but held in back when he tried to leave.</p><p>-I-I might need help with my upper clothes with the sling is in the way, could you-</p><p>He blushed on the side but nodded and helped out of her sleeves delicately while staring at the roof. When done he asked her if she needed help further or could manage from here.</p><p>-I will handle the rest, yes, thank you Ren.</p><p>-No problem he curtly said. I'm going to search for clothes for you. Take your time. I will be just behind the door if you need me.</p><p>Ren hurried out of the bathroom and closed the door behind him. He went to his closet, opened it and closed the door again once inside. Then and only then, he rest his back on a wall and breathed again.</p><p>Ren took some clothes and quickly returned in front of the door of the bathroom to wait in case she needed anything.</p><p>…</p><p>When she finally got inside the tub after much struggling to remove her trousers, a few tears came as pain downside stung by the contact of water and soap but once it subsided she never wanted to get out of it. She had to be careful to not drench her left arm though but beside that, the very hot water did wonders to her sore muscles, bruises and cuts.</p><p>The bubble bath gel smelt wonderful as much as the plants. And the more minutes ticked by as she stayed in the water and the more the salts were slowly making her skin smoother and relaxed her even more.</p><p>She smiled very slightly.</p><p>
  <em>How did he figure I needed that hot for the temperature?</em>
</p><p>She stayed in the bath and focused on the warm water, grasping at the relaxing feeling to not think about something else until a knock was heard.</p><p>-Kyoko, are you okay? Don't stay too long until it gets cold. I'm going to prepare something warm to drink.</p><p>She didn't answer but heard him alright.</p><p>-Kyoko?</p><p>-Okay she mumbled just loud enough so that he grasped what she said.</p><p>-Call me if you need anything. I'll be back in a few minutes.</p><p>She heard his footsteps going away and closed her eyes back. She was a lot more relaxed and a lot less on guard but with that the emotions came back in force at the front and she felt edgy so much so her feelings were overwhelming her. Now that she had nothing to fear as she was inside Ren's apartment, she couldn't find any reason to divert her attention of the elephant in the room and was close to breaking. She took a sponge and vehemently scrubbed her skin until it was red, again and again. Once she was satisfied, she dropped the sponge and closed her eyes.</p><p>
  <em>Not now…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Not here…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>A few more instants to build herself back into composure and the water became too cold to bear, she got out. She took the plushy towel on the radiator and wrapped herself in it, grateful for the warm it provided.</p><p>Kyoko was more or less dry when another Knock came.</p><p>-Kyoko?</p><p>She hummed in reply.</p><p>-Are you out?</p><p>-Yes.</p><p>-Okay. I have clothes for you. They will be too large but they should be comfy and  warm enough. I can creak open the door and give them to you from here if you can manage.</p><p>Kyoko tried to speak but her voice got stuck again.</p><p>-Or I can come in, he proposed after a while, I won't-</p><p>-No! Kyoko objected panicked. He couldn't see her body. It was already ugly and boring in normal circumstances but now her legs were covered with bruises and some significate and peculiar ones too. He couldn't see them. It's disgusting.</p><p>
  <em>And he would surely guess what happened…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…I don't want him to know…I don't want him to be disgusted with me or to pity me…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>No… even if he didn't…I still wouldn't want him to know…it's too raw…too personal…</em>
</p><p>-Okay answered Ren softly. Then can you catch them if I give them to you through the door.</p><p>She walked wobbly to the bathroom door.</p><p>-I can. I'm just behind.</p><p>He opened the door the slightest and extended his hand with a bundle of clothes in it. Kyoko grabbed the bundle in her hands and thanked him.</p><p>-No problem.</p><p>She stared at the clothes in her hands. A worn-out soft cotton long-sleeves deep grey t-shirt with a large shoulder to shoulder scoop 'neck cut, old black pyjamas pants, the hoodie he had lent to her the time she came to learn cat's walk and to her great embarrassment; boxers.</p><p>And to her utter shock she discovered she wasn't too far past the point of being embarrassed by this sort of thing as the deep hue on her face proved it.</p><p>Kyoko looked at the pieces again. There were so big. She could make a tent of the tee. She shook her head and his scent drugged her instantly as she passed on the t-shirt which had morphed drastically on her. The scoop 'neck cut became an off-shoulder cut that was barely hanging and the bottom of the thing went to her knees.</p><p>She blinked.</p><p>It looked like she was wearing a very too large loose dress.</p><p>
  <em>Poor Ren's shirt…it really doesn’t have its place on me…I'm drowning in it…but it's very comfy…</em>
</p><p>She took the dark boxers and with renew hue put them on. They weren't too loose to fall but it was still quite large.</p><p>She donned the pants then tried to make them stick but to no avail.</p><p>-Ren? Kyoko timidly asked, hesitant.</p><p>-Yes? was the right away answer.</p><p>-Do you have a hair-band by any chance?</p><p>He chuckled a bit.</p><p>-I'm not sure. I'm gonna look around, give me a minute.</p><p>He came back shortly after.</p><p>-I don't have one, sorry Kyoko. Was it important?</p><p>Kyoko didn't answer. She still felt a bit in shock but the bath had cleared her mind a bit though she still felt very tired.</p><p>She had an issue to resolve. She observed her legs in wonders. The tee went a bit past her knees, her feet were clean of any cut or bruises and her calves had barely one or two, the most damage on her thighs were completely covered by the t-shirt. She didn't feel really at ease but objectively there was nothing that prevented her to go without.</p><p>
  <em>Could I?</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Well I suppose I don't have a choice anyway…</em>
</p><p>She adjusted as much as she could the tee so that it wouldn't slip before taking the hoodie in her unharmed hand and opening the door just to bunt into Ren.</p><p>He took a step back.</p><p>-Sorry I- he dropped off.</p><p>-The pants are too large, they didn't stay on she explained bluntly, too tired to care more than that.</p><p>Ren didn't answer right away; he just stared at her with a crazy burning glint in the eyes, clenched jaw and tight lips. And if she wasn't so tired to be sure she could have swear his eyes wandered up to down several times.</p><p>
  <em>Must be my imagination…</em>
</p><p>-I will figure it out suddenly declared Ren. Give me just a second and I'll be back with something and he left like he was on fire. Kyoko was pretty sure that even with the confusion her state invoked she could still assure she never saw him accelerate so urgently before.</p><p>And less than two minutes later he was indeed back with something else that looked a bit more snug which permitted that it wouldn't fall off as she noted after quickly putting it on. She felt a lot more at ease now.</p><p>-Thank you Ren.</p><p>…</p><p>-No problem he replied roughly and drifting off in his thoughts for a second.</p><p>
  <em>My sanity couldn't have handle it…To see her coming out in just my shirt will already be heatedly  imprinted in my memory like the most sexy apparition I would ever see in my life…Burning and blinding me…</em>
</p><p>
  <em> Her beautiful calves…The sexy clavicles and neck visible in my loose t-shirt…</em>
</p><p>The only thing it could evoke in him was to remove this fucking shirt and worship her…To kiss every spot of her skin. To caress its velvety. To roam her form with eyes and hands. To pleasure her to no end. To make discover what it could be to feel together, to be in his embrace. And for him to be in hers.</p><p>
  <em>I wonder what taste her skin has…What scent she emit when she aroused…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>God…</em>
</p><p>He cleared his throat and shook off his naughty thoughts and saw that Kyoko was resting a bit heavily against the door frame.</p><p>-Kyoko?</p><p>-Hmm…</p><p>Ren smiled, still concerned though.</p><p>-Come on, I've prepared something.</p><p>Kyoko mumbled something.</p><p>-Sorry?</p><p>-It's scary Kyoko repeated a bit louder.</p><p>-Oi! Ren protested in offense. It's something I know how to do, don't worry Ren argued a bit vexed but knowing under any other circumstances it would be fair.</p><p>-Come, it will warm you up he said again when she stayed on the frame. He saw her straightening up then stumbling and barely catching herself.</p><p>Ren observed her now covered legs with new worry. They were still shaking a bit and seemed very unstable like they could let go at any moment. Like they were supporting Kyoko's body only by the pure will of the owner of it.</p><p>Ren stared back precipitately at her face and indeed he could see clear as light drops of sweat refining at her temples under her strains.</p><p>Ren frowned at the obvious signs. It was something else than an aborted accident.</p><p>-You are not good, aren't you? Ren said more as an affirmation than a question.</p><p>-I'm fine protested Kyoko.</p><p>-Kyoko. Why are your legs so unsteady, then?  It's like they are half numb or something…and it's tiring yourself out.</p><p>He saw her grimaced and it was all the confirmation he needed.</p><p>-It was not a classical accident, right? Again, not a question.</p><p>Kyoko refused to talk and kept looking on the side admitting in a way the truth and Ren signed, he had guessed it from the very beginning but she could be very hard to read and he thought he was maybe worrying over nothing like the worrywart she kept saying he is.</p><p>-Kyoko…he started, tell me.</p><p>She nabbed at her lip and circles her arms around her squeezing the hoodie against her belly as much as she could with her left one still in a sling.</p><p>-Kyoko…Please.</p><p>She harshly rotated her head from sides, closing completely up. But Ren saw her clutching at her head and wobbled on her feet again.</p><p>He promptly caught her.</p><p>-In any ways Ren sighed after stabilizing her, You are NOT fine. At all. You can't even stand. Let me get you to the living room and then we'll talk.</p><p>She tried to protest but Ren didn't give her any more time to argue and swiftly lift her light body up in his arms and once again not even one complain was heard. She just let him carry her with ease to the other room, completely relaxing her limbs after the first tense.</p><p>He put her down on the couch and went quickly to the kitchen to bring back a fuming mug.</p><p>-Here. It's cocoa. It's still very hot, careful Ren added when he saw her quickly putting her hands on the outside of the mug.</p><p>For a while, they stayed silent while Kyoko sipped her drink, though her eyes still grew the first time she tasted it and Ren, unknowingly to her, pouted.</p><p>
  <em>I can still make hot cocoa...!</em>
</p><p>He then stood and went quickly to in his bedroom, sending a quick message to Yashiro-san to move around his morning schedule and came back with a cover to put on her after having seen her shivering.</p><p>-Better?</p><p>She nodded with a quick of a smile.</p><p>Ren took in a good breath and focus on the task at hand.</p><p>-Kyoko he started sternly. I know you didn't tell me the everything. What really happened?</p><p>She froze.</p><p>Shook her head again.</p><p>-Please he pleaded, you can talk to me you know that.</p><p>-I know that.</p><p>
  <em>Confide in me… how can I help you if you don't? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>You look so down…And your eyes…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>How can I help you my sweet Kyoko…</em>
</p><p>-I know I can she murmured.</p><p>-Then-</p><p>-But no.</p><p>-Kyoko…Come on, I'm corn, remember…you used to be able to tell me everything…is it because I don't look like him anymore?</p><p>She turned her eyes and for the first time since she came, her gaze went softer.</p><p>-Ren, she said softly with a shake of the head, your appearance doesn't matter to me, neither your name. You could be have the most dull name of the universe of be blue skin with green hair and you still be corn and Ren at the same time. I don't care at all. It's not the issue.</p><p>Ren's eyes glaze over, touched by her words. Everyone used to judge him so much on what he looked like or what was his name and relations but she didn't care?</p><p>
  <em>Such an amazing open woman…</em>
</p><p>He concentrated back on the subject.</p><p>-Then why? I won't judge you. I promise.</p><p>She signed and looked at him again.</p><p>-Don't you trust me, Kyoko? Ren insisted. She had helped him so much and countless times if listen to her could lift a bit of the heavy burden she seemed to carry since she arrived could help, he could gladly do it.</p><p>
  <em>Let me help you…Let me share your burdens…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me be your shoulder…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I would be anything for you…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You sempai, your friend, your rock, your confident; your lover…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Let me help!</em>
</p><p>She stared into his eyes and appeared to hesitate.</p><p>-Of course I trust you.</p><p>-Then-</p><p>Her eyes gazed again into his and turned pleading, pleading for something, for understanding and she turn her eyes away.</p><p>-But I can't. Please don't ask me that Ren she said. Please, not now, she looked back at him with the most imploring look on her face and begged at him, deep sorrow on her face even more poignant that tears and Ren stood there thrown into confusion for a second.</p><p>The next one, the urge to erase her tears so that she would never be sad ever again grew exponentially as his distraught and pain for her did too.</p><p>…</p><p>-Please, I trust you but I can't, I just can't talk about Kyoko begged as she saw the concern on Ren's face grow. I just don't want to talk about it.</p><p>-Please she said again while looking into his eyes, desperate.</p><p>-Please she whispered in a hollow voice, tears starting to break through.</p><p>
  <em>No…not now…I promise myself I would let me now…I was doing so good at controlling it…But, he gets so easily under my guard…Before he knew it he had seen right through the cracks…right through me…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Come on Kyoko, hang on! </em>
</p><p>
  <em>You can do it…</em>
</p><p>She couldn't, she wouldn't. She had always managed to handle hard things by herself; she was even used to it so why couldn't she do it again?</p><p>
  <em>It's no big deal…Come o-</em>
</p><p>Long strong lenient arms suddenly broke her internal dialogue and engulfed her in a delicate yet secure clinch and big hands firmly hold her figure and pressed her cautiously on a hard chest; altering on caressing her back and lightly stroking her head with his fingers and rubbing his nose on the crown of her head, messing with her soft hair.</p><p>Her body shook, snapping when her control over her emotions shattered and she whimpered for a second before howling violently in his arms. Squashing her face into his chest and gripping at the front of his blouse with both arms even it hurt her wound one, she just gripped tighter and bawled. The urge only getting stronger and stronger by the seconds. Pearls of water flew from her eyes over and over and drenched the clothes she was nuzzling her face in.</p><p>Her cries continued for a long while bringing her to panting but for each wail, each cry; the strong arms would clench around her harder. And soft words would be mumbled endlessly, prompting her, lulling her; hoping desperately that he could appease her pain somehow.</p><p> </p><p>Eventually though, she had no more tears to shed, drained beyond imaginable after such a long time crying and the dryness of her eyes was too far anyway, her pupils even burned at the new sensation.</p><p>The only remained proof of her state settling was the ragged breath coming out of her mouth as she was chocking a bit to bring air inside and inhale normally.</p><p>Kyoko cooled down a bit more and slowly the external world came back to her. She started to notice the beating heart against her ear, the slow brushes of big firm hand in her locks, the wet cloth where she was resting her head and the excruciating pain in her left arm as she had clasped it harshly despite the hurt.</p><p>She felt a bit better now that she had evacuated all the tears of her body but she didn't want to move, she now she was pushing it, abusing a lot but he didn't seem to mind and Kyoko couldn't bring herself to move away from this comforting nest. She felt like she was enveloped in the warmest and safest cocoon. She never wanted to move again.</p><p><em>Just a few more minutes…</em>She thought slowly lulled to sleep.</p><p>…</p><p>Running his fingers in the silky strands hoping he could soothe her a bit, Ren reflected on her burst of tears. He had never seen her wrecked herself like that. She had even choke on her on own breath and violently quake all the while.</p><p>
  <em>Not even the event concerning her mother had made such an impact…</em>
</p><p>He was sure of it. As such, driving his mind in circles in hope of figure out what could have happened. What could have been the reason of her dramatic distress. He knew something had happened, it could feel it and just by the look of it, chill was running down his back at the prospects of the ifs. He didn't need her to tell him to know it was very bad. Her way to act was amply sufficient.</p><p>He had hesitated forcing her to talk about it but finally opted against. More than anyone, he knew what it was to be drowning into darkness, to want nothing more than to escape it and therefore to never talk, think and ever addressed what were the issues, what lay in the past. He knew too well. That's why Ren couldn't bring himself to force her. If she wasn't ready to talk about it… maybe it was too fresh?</p><p>It didn't matter anyway…</p><p>If she wasn't ready, he wouldn't force her to talk about whatever happened…She perfectly knew he knew she hadn't said everything…</p><p>Ren had to respect it. And wait.</p><p>
  <em>Even if it's killing me to not be able to help her more than this…</em>
</p><p>Even if he would have gave nearly anything to know so that he could help her.</p><p>He would respect her choice and wait, hoping she could or would want to confide later.</p><p>She had done it for him before, it was just fair.</p><p>Ren looked down, she had finally relaxed and was clinging to him and Ren couldn't help to think that in any other circumstance not involving her being upset, he would had enjoy this very much.</p><p>He tried to move away but she wouldn't let him go.</p><p>
  <em>Adorable…</em>
</p><p>He finally managed and observed her face; red eyes and all with reinforce attention.</p><p>-How do you feel he finally questioned when he saw her blinked a few times like she was disoriented.</p><p>She looked at him. Somehow during her crying bout she had moved into his lap and had curled herself around him. She looked completely defenceless.</p><p><em>Her face is a mix between bewilderment and innocence…it's criminal how cute it is…</em>Ren chuckled inwardly.</p><p>-Hum she mumbled still hooked to him and his shirt. A bit relieved and tired.</p><p>-I bet Ren said with a smile and brushed away the tray of her last tears with his thumbs and he saw her blush a bit which ease his concern a great lot.</p><p>
  <em>Finally a normal reaction…</em>
</p><p>-You should go to sleep he suggested after a few more minutes of gazing at her.</p><p>She nodded and yawned.</p><p>-I would gladly get you to the guest room Ren proposed and he circled her with arms again to hoist up before standing.</p><p>But Kyoko paled greatly all of sudden and he stopped his action.</p><p>-What is it? Do you feel nauseous? Is it too soon? Ren asked with concern.</p><p>She refuted it and shook her head.</p><p>-That's not it Kyoko explained shyly and she raised her gaze to meet his own. I-I don't want to be-…</p><p>She whispered the end and turned her eyes on the side resulting in him not catching the last part.</p><p>-I didn't hear that.</p><p>She blushed fiercely this time but kept her lips closed.</p><p>-Kyoko? Ren asked again and put his hand on her cheek to make her look at him. Tell me. I would gladly help but you have to tell me. I'm at your commands.</p><p>After a lot shifting from her part, which was really not a good idea in Ren's mind, he didn't need any distraction if he wanted to hear what she was going to say, Kyoko finally blurted out in hushed murmured:</p><p>-I don't-want-to-be-alone-please.I-would-like-to-stay-with-you-for-sleep.</p><p>Ren blinked.</p><p>
  <em>Did that just came out of her mouth?</em>
</p><p>-Come again he said frozen on the spot.<em> I hit my head and my delusional mind is making up all this …</em></p><p>Kyoko whimpered a bit but repeat a slower.</p><p>-Can I stay with you for sleep? She demanded with pleading eyes. Please?</p><p>She knew was out of line but the fear of being alone right now was far more greater than the one of improper behaviour.</p><p>Ren stared at her, more than a bit shocked but once again having no power to resist her.</p><p>-You sure? He still asked.</p><p>She nodded.</p><p>-Please.</p><p>Ren gulped once and rose up.</p><p>-Let's go to bed he declared while carrying them to his bedroom a bit shakenly when Kyoko curled to him even more.</p><p>
  <em>It's a reverse universe…</em>
</p><p>Once in the bedroom he laid her down under the covers and stretched out at the other side of the bed, more jumpy than ever before in his life which was quickly proven when he half leaped when Kyoko closed the gap between them to press her form to his chest and he enveloped her in a tight hug, incapable to not feel pure bliss in holding her in his arms right now.</p><p>-Thank you Ren she murmured sleepily before drowsing off.</p><p>-You're welcome he whispered back and between the rollercoaster of emotions and the very late or early hour, he drifted only a minute behind surrounded by the marvellous knowledge of her being just there, soothed away by her presence as she has been by him even after the hardships she just went through.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sooooo…Here is the balm for your bruised hearts. As I said I'm not that cruel. We are back on fluffy goodness and it's great! The only moments that could be dark will be flashbacks or sometimes talks about it in the close future. After I don't know but I don't have anything else that harsh planned. Though it doesn't mean it won't have hard moments but no more very very dark ones.<br/>Hope you will like it. I loved it, it was fun and really moving though sometimes the emotions are too much for me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0026"><h2>26. New beginnings first need balm on fresh wounds –part 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.<br/>WARNING( the intro speak about sexual assaults in some way and Japan laws)<br/>I would also like to address some point: Someone was concerned about what could be in most countries really unrealistic. The way the hospital acted, no reports, no police, no complaint or no investigation. And I agree, it's what we know about how it's conducted usually.<br/>Now, unfortunately, it's not like that in Japan. In Japan, people are all about not creating troubles, waves, not having scandals. The mere existence of a special department for rapes and abused people in hospitals are very very recent in Japan. Less than ten years ago, there was none. And having subscribed to some Japanese news, i know in most cases, police dismiss the rapes from the very beginning even if a person come in this sort of state. <br/>Really, I've saw and read some crazy things and just recently some outcast articles had made the buzz because finally some women are protesting against the abuses they are facing(because most of the time they just don't tell anyone, it's one of the country where abuses on people are reported the less) and demanding more severe laws, because there are lot of breaches in Japanese laws that permit most of the time to abuser to stay clean, to be released or to not even go the trial. Patriarchy is still very rooted in Japanese society. There is one law dating from 1907 still going on that state that unless a woman fight enough or that a crushing force, threats or that there is an inability total to resist from her then it's not a rape.  It's a law created to prevent cheating from spouses, to protect husband. Today, it's still available. In other words, if you are tetanized by fear, if the man just punched you once, if he drugged you even…Yeah, because it's only apply to disabled people, not to force inability, of course. Then, all of that go to the trash, none of that is proof that you were abused.<br/>The only way a trial and investigation is done on rape matter is if there are solid proofs already. Which the hospital don't have to report most of the time unless the victim decided to officially initiate pursuits with already the proofs in hand. Now, the hospitals have to do the minimal tests, that's obligatory, but they don't have to give it to anyone or investigate unless the victim required them to and even then, most of the time it's hell to go through it.</p><p>Japan is one of the less advanced country in laws matter...<br/>Now, concerning the drug, the police might investigate is in a drug trafficking context but if not...the hospital might just report that one person came after an aggression under the influence of the drug...but that's about all and if abuses or rapes are suggested, there are an implicit back out from the police most of the time. They discredit and dismiss it...Or they don't believe it. Period. I know there are cases like that around the world too but it's a general act in Japan...<br/>Most of the times, if the victim didn't fight enough, the assaulter is seen as innocent, it's the first question asked to the victims: did you fight enough?<br/>It's their culture.So it's because it's Japan that I wrote it that way. Of course, in most other country, the police is contacted or there is a report done and then an interview and all that...<br/>Here, in this sort of situation, in this sort of culture...Let's say there is no 90% of the cases where the women don't reports in other countries and it's more than 99% in Japan. Because they are too ashamed, don't want people to know even if it was to help them and because they know it won't result in anything...<br/>In this situation, Kyoko wouldn't go...Honestly, with this context, the only reason she went to the hospital in my point of view and in her state of shock was because her arms needed treatments and stitches...<br/>Would she not have been hurt, she wouldn't even have gone to the hospital...<br/>Quite frankly, it's not for nothing if Japan has one of the best implanted traffic prostitution. In most cases, the assaulter won't ever be punished, it's as high as the lack of report, so in more than 99% of the cases they have to nothing to worry about, the practically ruled the ways.<br/>Now, that's cleared. You can imagine how it complicates things to punish the bad guys directly in my story. Now, don't get me wrong, I want it too. But to stay coherent, it would have to be subtle and not necessarily like you would have like. Some people being quite scary in their hopes to retaliation, though I understand.  <br/>End of warning<br/>I'm really sorry for the very long intro but I felt like it needed to be addressed so there would have no confusion. Of course I did my homework before taking this path. Now I'm sure some of you already knew about all this …well like that It's clear.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko woke up feeling fuzzy. And a bit too much comfy. If she didn't think twice she would never want to get ever again.</p><p>
  <em>I feel like I'm engulfed in marshmallows…</em>
</p><p>It didn't smell like her bed. It' didn't feel like her futon. The sheets were far too soft and silky and the mattress far too comfortable. The weirdest thing was she couldn't move. She felt like she was encased in strong warmness. Her legs were pinned heavily as long as her right arm.</p><p>A rumble rebound on her chest steadily and she listened to it for a while. She could move her left arm but it wasn't of any help as its global mobility and strength were still very low.</p><p>Still slightly asleep, she attempted to move and shifted her head a bit but stopped abruptly, tickled by something smooth under her chin.</p><p>She shifted again and her nose brushed into it making her want to sneeze and giggle at the same time which made her opened her eyes a crack and noticed her hand was touching it too. She ruffled it puzzled.</p><p>
  <em>It looks familiar…and it's so soft.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Like Ren's hair…</em>
</p><p>Ren.</p><p>The memories came rushing back into, some really bitter and dreadful and others. I went to hospital, took a taxi, came here, bathed, cried and-…fell asleep.</p><p><em>That's right I'm at Ren's…</em>Kyoko thought while blinking to rub out the last remains of drowsiness.</p><p>Then she froze on the spot. Remembered the peculiar sheets, bed and the…</p><p>
  <em>Hair…</em>
</p><p><em>If I'm at Ren's, then </em>She thought dreadfully while looking down to see the tuff of hair pressed just below her chin tickling her collarbones and a very peaceful content face soundly asleep resting against her chest while his arms hold her tightly pressed on his upper body and his legs intertwined with her owns weighted on her.</p><p>
  <em>Kyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa….</em>
</p><p>She blushed to the roots. To see him nesting and clinging to her with such nonchalance. Her shock splited between property again and how it made her feel. How much she loved the idea of him feeling at ease against her, near her. Still…</p><p><em>What are you doing here?!  It's no place to sleep…</em>she freaked out with another bout of embarrassment.</p><p>After a few minutes, her heart finally calmed and she stared at him baffled.</p><p><em>What is this man always taking me for a pillow</em> …? Kyoko wondered while imagining if her figure could look a bit like a cushion.</p><p>
  <em>It can't be comfortable…I have not much in this area…</em>
</p><p>She kept watching him and couldn't help running her hand through his smooth strands. She was afraid she would wake him but after staring at him some more, she realized he was really in a deep slumber and Kyoko let loose on some her hidden feelings.</p><p><em>He seems so innocent like that…like it's the best sleep of his life </em>She thought with a quiet giggle.</p><p>
  <em>Maybe I'm making a greater pillow that I imagine…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Can a pillow try itself if he's comfy…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko reflected on self pillows for a while, measuring the effects, the possibilities and the limits.</p><p>
  <em>I can't even verify if it applies to everyone or if this guy just weird…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Not fair…Time to switch, I want to try my theory and see if every human being can be an efficient acceptable pillow…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko stared at him frustrated and feeling like an insect stuck in a spider's web again but her eyes soon softened.</p><p>She was glad to be here. Even if it was artificial. Even if she didn't let him much of a choice, bursting here in her state late at night. She didn't thought she could sleep but had finally had a sound slumber. Thanks to him.</p><p>
  <em>Thank you for your kindness…Thank you for being you, mr.fairy.</em>
</p><p><em>-</em>Even if you have weird tastes in pillows matter…</p><p>
  <em>He looks still tired though…</em>
</p><p>Which she imagined was pretty normal after being awoke at three in the morning when your Kohai just took a taxi and came drenched at your door asking to stay and-</p><p><em>-</em>wait.</p><p>
  <em>The taxi. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>The driver!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The money!!</em>
</p><p>She had forgot to asked Ren…</p><p><em>Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…!!!!!.</em>She shrieked in her head, holding her face in her hands.</p><p>Or so she thought.</p><p>Because next instant, the body glued to her jumped in the air partially lifting her from the mattress and hitting her chin on the way.</p><p>-Ouch.</p><p>-What happened? What's the matter? Are you okay? Asked Ren panicked before noticing Kyoko rubbing her chin.</p><p>-Sorry he quickly said and inspected her face, ignoring her protests.</p><p>-I'm fine she said again.</p><p>-Then why did you scream? Ren asked.</p><p>-Ah. Sorry. I'm-…Hum…She hesitated a bit but it was far too late for that and she knew it. I forgot to pay the taxi last night. I was going to ask you if you could advance the money so I could pay you back as I didn't have any on me but I completely forgot Kyoko explained ashamed.</p><p>-Oh. That's it? Asked Ren already more relaxed.</p><p>-That's it?! What if he waited hours outside? Kyoko growled.</p><p>-I'm sure he didn't Ren said with a chuckle.</p><p>-It's even worse! It's not right. I'm just going to just-</p><p>-Oh no, you are not Ren pushed her to sit back on the bed. I'm going to check. Wait here.</p><p>He returned a few minutes later with a reassuring smile.</p><p>-The guardian had paid for it Ren said. He even added it was not so rare of an occurrence. I paid him back.</p><p>-Thank you Kyoko timidly said relieved. I will pay you back.</p><p>-It's out of question.</p><p>-But-</p><p>-No but. Now, why don't you come have breakfast with me after this trembling awaken.</p><p>Kyoko coloured, embarrassed but also preoccupied to have woke him up when he was sleeping with such an enjoyment and she knew he had rarely the occasion to sleep in with his work to-</p><p>She gasped loudly and Ren watched her with a certain amusement this time and an inquired eyebrow.</p><p>-What time is it? Kyoko asked frantic.</p><p>-Hum…half past nine I think Ren replied.</p><p>Kyoko chocked.</p><p>-Your work! You are going to be late. Noooo…I'm so sorry…Quickly, grab your keys and drive. Don't bother with me. Just go!! Kyoko exclaimed pushing to the front door a trembling and so terribly slow Ren.</p><p>-Ren! Come on. You can't be late! Kyoko stated and threw his keys into his hand.</p><p>Ren took a breath.</p><p>-Kyoko-… he started.</p><p>-Not now, you will lecture me later. Go!</p><p>He coughed.</p><p>-In pyjamas? He finally managed.</p><p>Kyoko stared at him like he was crazy. Then it hit.</p><p>-Argghhhh…!Why are you in your pyjamas??!!</p><p>-Well I just woke as you personally know and as I was trying to expl-</p><p>-Whatever…Kyoko interrupted. Yeah in Pyjamas and all concluded Kyoko quickly. They will find you clothes, they always have clothes for you. They would always find something if it's for the Tsuruga Ren. I don't know your planning but if it's a shoot, well you are not wearing you own clothes anyways and same goes for a role. You have to undress and you'll be fine. An interview might be problematic but you managed to make swallow my ridiculous gift from last time to everyone so coming in Pyjamas might just work like you being a normal person having hard time getting out of bed sometimes Kyoko thought hardly.</p><p><em>This might just work…All his pyjamas are high-classes and he looks just enough dishevelled to seem even more sexy </em>She thought with a blush forming.</p><p>Ren bent over. Shaking violently, he couldn't stand it any seconds more and tears prickled at the corner of his eyes while he imagined himself coming on stage in his pyjamas pretending to have overslept.</p><p>-Yo-you…don't have…to torture…haha…yourself…harf…so much He got out trying desperately to breath under her severe glare.</p><p>He tried again.</p><p>-I moved around my morning sche-dule… already. I sent a message to Yashiro last night Ren explained.</p><p>She frowned still. She looked absolutely adorable, biting her lips and ruffling her hair in concern while she stared at him from the side wanting to be sure he was telling the truth.</p><p>-Really? You are not late?</p><p>-I promise Ren assured with a smile.</p><p>-Okay she mumbled with a sigh and Ren lost it.</p><p>
  <em>Too cute…</em>
</p><p>He took a step near her looking closely in her eyes he smiled and very delicately pecked her right cheek. Then he stepped back.</p><p>Kyoko instantly turned crimson and looked at him in a conflict of horror, embarrassment and something odd that he couldn't really identify but look like sweet defeat.</p><p><em>Now what does that mean…</em>He thought.</p><p>-For worrying about my work and me so much Ren cut her seeing she was about to make him go through the question to get answers of his reasons.</p><p>Kyoko stared at him without a word, not even knowing where to start.</p><p>-You! Youuu!</p><p>Ren, feeling his mischievous side coming out just grinned innocently.</p><p>
  <em>Can't help it…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You made me see my past under another light…Now I don't have any reason to not be myself around you…You don't know what you're up for…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>My less policed side is now-… on the loose around you…</em>
</p><p>-Come on. I ordered food for breakfast. Let's settle the table.</p><p>She nodded grumpily and soon they were sitting on the floor near his low living room table and eating. She saw Ren studying her from time to time while they ate, observing if she was okay, she was sure. He even interrogated her several times and asked how she felt this morning, if her legs were fine and if he could help in any matter but he never prodded again on the reasons behind her condition of last night.</p><p>The morning was nearing its ends both would need to active quickly.</p><p>For work of course but Kyoko also couldn't stand to stay one second more near him. The events of yesterday were just behind the corner of her mind ready to jump at her like some kid monster while at the front jingled the comfort Ren gave her, his kindness, the way her body clang to him last night and his way to answer, his closeness the sweetest melody to the soul but also a tempting torture without end.</p><p>
  <em>I'm turning into a masochist…</em>
</p><p>So when the time came Kyoko nearly bolt outside but not before Ren promising to regularly checks on her state and her swearing to take it easy.</p><p>She agreed to everything and he dropped her off at Daruyama.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0027"><h2>27. The final sparks to the new unknown</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko was walking down the hall, dread coming and leaving every few steps and stopping her before she would start again. She knew what she had to do but it didn't make it easier.</p><p>The hospital had called and she had got the results. Which had been a good and a bad thing.</p><p> It was one week ago. Three since what happened. So she had had a bit of time to think.</p><p>She wasn't sleeping well. Her nights were plagued with horrendous nightmares and it made her jumpy and anxious. Her friends and others had noticed she was not her as bubbly as usual she knew but she had managed to make it seemed like no big deal. Like it was tiredness or just teenager worries.</p><p>She was an actress after all.  And she didn't mind what they thought as long as they couldn't suspect the scale of her issues.</p><p>She wasn't well, far from it. She still felt dirty all the time, using the shower more than she ever had before to the point of worrying her landlords. And beside Ren, she was very nervous when a boy or man came close to her. Her fear creeping up inside of her from any moves from them that her mind could interpret as dangerous. Even with Yashiro-san, she was itchy and didn't felt as safe as before.</p><p>But she was trying to go on, grasping at her sanity, at every normal patterns routine to keep going on with only pure will and fear to fall into a hole of despair and darkness if she didn't move, advance and run faster than it. She felt like she was suffocating most of the times, she was awkward with everyone, even Moko-san. She didn't know how to face Ren because she knew he was no duped and was the one the most likely to figure it out. She couldn't stand that thought so she was avoiding him again.</p><p>But most of all, for every little moment with him, her desire grew. They were closer than before. Since she knew about his past and about him being Corn. But she felt like it was a bit artificial because even if they were closer, even if she knew about his true name, about Corn, about his hard past and they were calling by first names but they still acted like kohai and sempai. More than that, Kyoko still felt like she was just his junior, his friend too. But a young friend.</p><p>Deep in her heart, after learning all this, she couldn't stand it anymore. She knew she wouldn't ever be more than a friend. But if they were friends, she wanted to act like it. At least.</p><p>But she couldn't. Or rather she wasn't able to. Even if she wanted it from all her heart, it was like something was still holding her back. Well, sometimes it seemed like they were really acting like it and then they were too awkward.</p><p>She didn't understand.</p><p>But for each part of him he showed her, each little drops of vulnerability he unveiled in front of her she wanted to be closer. The desire would never cease. She wanted to laugh with him. Spend time with him outside of work, talk to him all the times. Just for him to be comfortable with her. Really comfortable.</p><p>There were like momentum where they would then they would fall back into sempai-kohai behaviour. No matter what they called themselves.</p><p>And that was tearing her apart. A lot more than the prospect of only be his friend that was and is still is and will always be an evidence.</p><p>But she desired a true friendship and felt like it wasn't possible.</p><p>No, maybe she was wrong. Maybe it was because deep deep down even with knowing the limits her heart desired more than this friendship didn't seem real.</p><p>In any ways you would put it, she desired more out of this man. Their recent moments of closeness induced by extremes circumstances had made her greedier. She kept wanting more. She didn't understand herself anymore and it was driving her nuts. She had never been a greedy person. Jealousy she knew but it was never like that. It was like an after-taste, a constant bitterness of what was not reachable with Sho. Now, it's like she would hang to every bits he would give her greedily. Knowing she wouldn't have the lion's share but wanted all she could get.</p><p>She felt lost.</p><p>
  <em>Is that how we are supposed to feel…?</em>
</p><p>On one side she would have any place in his life he would let her and would respect his choices, one another side she wished for so much more, for Everything! And there was also a big part who couldn't stand the very idea of him not finding happiness even if it was not with her, that would even be happy. It was like trying to fit pieces from different and opposite puzzles together. It didn't make any sense.</p><p>
  <em>How can you feel so much? </em>
</p><p>
  <em>How can you feel so much conflicting things at the same bloody time?!</em>
</p><p>She groaned, feeling a headache coming and shook herself of her disturbing thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>She should have gone to him sooner, immediately after the results came but she was scared and too ashamed. She had debated whether to do it all week, not managing to make her mind but also worried about what could happen if she didn't.</p><p>And then rumours had come whispering to her ear and setting her mind.</p><p> She was dragging it though, walking very slowly, little step after little ones to prepare herself to what she would have to do.</p><p>And that's how she found herself around the acting department of LME when she should be two stairs higher.</p><p>Kyoko breathed a bit more, grasping for her courage to come back to her.</p><p>She had to do it. It was criminal to not to.</p><p>
  <em>I cannot say nothing…</em>
</p><p>She inhaled again and turned her head, trying to clear it.</p><p>That's how her gaze fell on the dashboard of the department full of notes, advertisements and all; she froze.</p><p>Kyoko studied it for a while with intense concentration, thinking at full speed about every repercussion it could have. Thinking if she felt confident enough, if it was possible for her…</p><p> She certainly wanted to. No, that was wrong, it was not a question of wanting. It was a question needing it. It might solve a lot.</p><p>
  <em>It might just me what I need…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>If I can do it…</em>
</p><p>She ripped the pamphlet off the board and resumed her steps with new determination.</p><p>When she reached the door later though, her hands were back to shaking and she pushed it open with much an effort as she entered the office.</p><p> </p><p>…</p><p> </p><p>"I promise I will do all it's in my power, Mogami-kun" told her Lory at the end of their discussion. She could see he was paler than usual and without his upbeat energy. He had already made the calls and his hands had shaken all along. She couldn't blame him. Though sugar-coated for his ears, she had still retold a horrendous tale to him.</p><p>He bowed low to her suddenly and Kyoko jumped a bit when she heard his constricted voice.</p><p>"I'm sorry, Mogami-kun. As your boss I should have help prevent such a monstrous event"</p><p>She stood quickly.</p><p>"President, please. You don't need to bow to me. Please, stand up shachou-san" urged Kyoko, appalled he would go to such an extend for something he couldn't have control of.</p><p>"You told me who you suspected to be behind this, right?"</p><p>"Y-Yes"</p><p>"Mogami-kun. It was clearly linked to your work and some people you worked with and as such everything happening under that area is from my responsibility as I'm supposed to protect my talents, Mogami-kun so it's only right I apologize for not being able to do so" Her boss said as he rubbed his hands on his face.</p><p>She sighed. There was no way around this. The man was set on it.</p><p>"It wasn't but I won't be able to convince you otherwise so let's just switch topic" she said, accepting his nonsense about responsibility. She knew too well to attempt debating with the president. "Thank you, president. I would have only make matters worse if I was the one handling it. Going to the police by myself or talking would have result as discretisation of my words. So thank you for accepting my demand as I can't be the one to do it" she gratefully said bending at the waist.</p><p>When she lifted back her higher half her boss was looking at her with a genuine but very sad smile.</p><p>"Don't thank me for that. It's the mere I can do"</p><p>She nodded and hid her expression. He had absolutely no idea how grateful she felt at the moment. It wasn't nothing. She couldn't have done it by her own means. The rumours about it happening to some other starlet had her quaking from her very core. They would have gone about freely for who knows how long without president's help. She wouldn't have been able to do anything about it, no matter her complaints. New tears rolled on her face.</p><p>Tears of relief for the future people that wouldn't suffer the same fate but also as the water poured out from her eyes, bitterness finally left her heart with them. She couldn't redo things. It was how it was. But it was okay. Or it will be. Because they wouldn't be able to hurt anyone else. She trusted the president on that.</p><p>Yes, it will be.</p><p>Kyoko dried her eyes and rose her eyes to meet her president's ones, determination back again and even fiercer than before.</p><p>She placed the pamphlet on his desk and pushed it to him slowly and her voice didn't quake when she asked the question that would set her future.</p><p>"Can I sign up to this?"</p><p>The president looked down at it a bit confused at first before the first sneaky smile since she entered made its way to his clever face.</p><p>"I was actually going to propose it to you soon. I thought you might be able to handle it" declared her boss as he composed himself a bit.</p><p>"Really?" her eyes brightened at the prospect. If the president thought she could do it… Well, she thought she might have a chance anyway but having his approbation was good time to time.</p><p>The president nodded.</p><p>"But, are you aware that the period of time written is the minimum it will keep you there? If you make it, it can be far much more" her boss stated with a steady but confirming gaze.</p><p>"I realized" she said. "But I think I can do it. And more importantly I think I might need this"</p><p>The president nodded sternly at this.</p><p>"I think I agree. You need this. In every way possible" he said and his face turned sad again but he swiftly pulled out papers from his dressers and gave them to her to sign.</p><p>"There are also lists of the bare minimum you will need" he told her and he pulled another paper with the date of departure.</p><p>"It's going to begin soon. Three weeks at best. You will need to leave in two"</p><p>"I'm prepared to that" stated Kyoko.</p><p>"Then, we might just have to discuss how things will be arrange and the contact with us" explained Lory. "We'll see each other in a week for that"</p><p>She agreed and stood with the multiples papers in her hands. The one requiring her signature already in Lory's. She bowed and thanked him again and turned to leave.</p><p>"Mogami-kun, he stopped her, just so you know, I'm deeply sorry for what happened and if I wasn't afraid to make you queasy and that my approach might be ill-perceived I would give you a damn hug" declared the president gruffly and the voice once more clamped.</p><p>A half smile lifted the corner of her mouth and tears coming again, she fixed the president, moved but unable to express it and not wanting to even she had been able.</p><p>"The sentiment is very appreciated, boss"</p><p>After a last whispered thank you she left.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Enjoy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0028"><h2>28. -A step forward – ~ See you ~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>14 days later.</p><p>The trunk wheels rolled making a rhythmic tac each time they passed a joint as the suitcase was being pulled on the tiles. The puller huffed as the feminine figure shook under the weight of the shoulder bag she also carried.</p><p>The embarking time was in a hour. She had her passport and ticket. She was there early. She didn't want any disturbance.</p><p>She had been able to talk to Moko-san when she came back last week. She didn't tell her what happened of course. She couldn't. To no one. So she just told her she had seen the pamphlet and that the president had proposed her to join in. It was the easiest answer. Moko-san found it was great. That it will open new doors for her at the worse. Kyoko agreed. It was true. Even if it wasn't the only reason for her choice.</p><p>She had told him.</p><p>Even if she had been a coward about it, she still had told him. She knew he was busy with work and handling modelling jobs for some Italian brand. She knew he was enraging because she was keeping her distance and most of all because she hadn't really told him what happened. She knew he was worried about her and had tried again just next day of her talk with the president to corner her. She had escaped it by a hair. So she had told him she was busy handling some job things and avoided him again.</p><p> Then she had learned from Yashiro he had to go for the modelling gig. It was five days ago. She knew she wouldn't see him in a while and had spent a bit of time watching him when he was looking the week before it, knowing she wouldn't be able to say goodbye.</p><p>She had waited he was gone and texted him. Three days earlier. Telling him how amazing the opportunity was for her career and that she was leaving in three days. He hadn't answered.</p><p>He had called. Right away.</p><p>Asking her to explain it properly. She did. His answers were cut by long pregnant pauses as he listened to her but he still did congratulated her. She had caressed her phone all the while the call lasted. She didn't think they would be able to talk much after this and she didn't know for how long. She would have another number.</p><p>He had said he would call again. He didn't.</p><p>Yashiro texted her he was too busy.</p><p>She understood. Thought it was better that way.</p><p>It was three days later. She wouldn't see him again.</p><p>Today was the day. She was leaving.</p><p>Kyoko sat in some waiting area and breathed heavily.</p><p>She knew it was the right choice. She knew she couldn't call. She knew it would be less painful that way. But her heart refused to listen.</p><p>It only wanted one thing. To hear his voice. To see him.</p><p>She was ruminating and scolding her stupid heart when she heard a voice calling her name. She turned around.</p><p> </p><p>"Oneeeee-samaaa!!!" shouted something as a small body collided with her.</p><p>Kyoko giggled a bit.</p><p>"Hi Maria-chan. What are you doing here?" she asked the girl.</p><p>A high figure draped silk golden cloths came in and answered instead and Kyoko wondered in what he was disguised today, it sound Arabic but she wasn't sure.</p><p>"She was threatening to murder me if I didn't let her say goodbye to you so I brought her to protect my poor life. You stole all of her affections, Mogami-kun, it's not really correct, don't you think. What about this poor grandfather of hers?" the president whined, even tearing up a bit.</p><p>"Stop playing drama queen grampa, you know I love you and it's your own fault to not letting me know sooner Maria-chan said as she lectured him like she was the adult and him the child.</p><p>He pouted then smiled, eyes glistering with unshed tears.</p><p>"So you still love me?" He asked in a worship whisper.</p><p>Maria rolled her eyes at him and tuned back to her.</p><p>"Ignore him one-sama. He's just playing aloof" she told as she hugged her again and Kyoko returned the hug.</p><p>"You will come back,neh?"the girl asked pulling away to look at Kyoko with sad eyes.</p><p>"I will"</p><p>Maria-chan brightened.</p><p>"When?"</p><p>Kyoko shook her head.</p><p>"I don't know. But it could be in a while. But I will come back eventually" Kyoko stated, trying to convey with the eyes what she couldn't say.</p><p>"I will miss you Maria-can" The young girl started to cry and Kyoko hugged her harder. She didn't want to hurt her but she needed this. Kyoko would have wanted to be there. Still.</p><p>"Maybe you can call once in a while?" Proposed Kyoko as she looked to the president for confirmation. "Your grandfather will have my new number so you can call me if you want" she softly said and she looked down at Maria.</p><p>"Really?"</p><p>Kyoko nodded.</p><p>"Like, really, really?!"</p><p>She giggled but nodded again.</p><p>"Thank you one-sama!" Maria shouted and hugged her again and Lory arched a brow at her before giving up, his family wasn't one to be discreet.</p><p>The interphone announced her plane in a half and Kyoko took her luggage.</p><p>"I'll better be going if I don't want to miss it"</p><p>The president nodded and to her surprised hugged her briefly this time. Kyoko said goodbye.</p><p>Kyoko was queuing on the line to the restricted area and had less than a quarter left before her plane arrival when she was promptly pulled out of it and away. In no time her bag and suitcase disappeared and she was in some nearly empty area, her head spinning and confused by the new environment. She heard then saw her bag fell to the ground and she found herself sitting on an empty seat again. She looked around and quickly spotted the tall figure close to her but looking away from her. He wore an ample jacket, very worn-out clothes and a black cap. He had tried his best to not stand out. It doesn't matter; it couldn't more noticeable and unique for her.</p><p>She stood again and he turned around to the sound of it.</p><p>He was there, he was really there. Here, with her. To say she was tempted to imagine it had a special meaning would be the euphemism of the century but she refrained.</p><p>She didn't know what to say though. She was overjoyed to be able to see him a last time but- She couldn't say she needed to leave, he knew it and it was even more obvious that she had been avoiding him. He also knew it was because she didn't want to talk about anything that happened. He knew all that and she could see in his gaze he wasn't angry. That somehow he understood. She should have known, he hadn't protested much to her avoidance. It had been too easy and it could only mean he had accepted she didn't want to talk. Because if not, he would have found her she realized.</p><p>It wasn't fair to him she knew it.</p><p>But there was still no trace of anger on his face. His shoulders were tensed and a bit crouched and hands fisted hardly. But it wasn't in anger.</p><p>If anything he seemed sad. Which was not normal. Why would he be sad? Well, yeah okay, she had avoided him but she apparently had get it wasn't against him so he wasn't one to tell you to refuse a job opportunity. So what was the matter?</p><p>His eyes seemed a bit hollow and he looked tired. Like he hadn't slept much recently. But it was the gripping torment in his eyes that made her froze in fear. He didn't look okay at all. What happened? Why was he so sad?</p><p>She began to lift her hand,</p><p>"Are you okay?" She whispered and she took a step to him, seriously worried now.</p><p>He blinked and hid his face from her, guessing she had seen his expression.</p><p>Then he jumped forward toward her. Making three large steps and engulfing her in his arms. Without a sound. Without a word.</p><p>The strength constricting her nearly prevented her to breath but she didn't care. She would have to memorize the feeling of the warm seeping through her clothes as those giant limbs hold her against him. There was such a force in the way he was tightening his arms then loosening them a bit around Kyoko that it looked like he was fighting himself with something. She saw his lips opened and closed several with only air passing through.</p><p>She lost it. She wanted to cling to him once more. The last one as a child. She gripped at his back.</p><p>This time, the power exerted on her expulsed all the air in her lungs and she choked a bit. She thought she heard her name whispered but she must have dreamt it.</p><p>He let go and she greedily aspired air.</p><p>He placed one hand on each side of her face tenderly and Kyoko stared into his eyes full of storm and thunder in contrast with the soft murmured voice that followed.</p><p>"Can I call you?"</p><p>Kyoko opened the mouth to reply but captured by the raging maelstrom of emotion in his eyes renounced and merely nodded.</p><p>His eyes sought hers again and she had the disturbing thought he was memorizing her traits before a whisper of a kiss landed on her left cheek and he let go.</p><p>He took her luggage and brought her back in line and again she was dizzy with the change. But she didn't have any more time to pay thought to what happened or she would miss her plane. She waved at him and rushed inside hiding the tears coming. She could have sworn he never stopped looking at her as long as she was visible and his reply to her wave.</p><p>It echoed in her mind long after the plane took off with her in it.</p><p>
  <em>See you…</em>
</p><p>"Goodbye Ren" was the murmur she gave to the wind.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>End of part one</em>
  </strong>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>You are all going strangle me but it needed to happen. I know I Know. I'm cruel. And I can apologize some more because of the time skip you will have. Enjoy. End of part one.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0029"><h2>29. ~  Bloomed Butterfly ~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Chapter one of second part-<br/>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>~  </em>
  <em>Bloomed Butterfly</em>
  <em> ~</em>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Five years minus three months later.</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>On the horizon, the sun rises and casts in a soft light on a window, a wall, a wardrobe and finally the entire bedroom revealing at the same time a large bed in which a young woman sleeps. As the light advances as the day takes its place on the night, it lights up the face of the young woman who moans, gently slides her hands towards the pillow to pull it above of her head. She creases her eyelids, sighs, turns around, clinging desperately to a dream that is probably too good, then finally opens her eyes. She leans on her arms and slowly raises her upper body, the sheet which covered her gently slides from her back, descending ever lower until it ran aground at the curvature of her hips, wrapping sensually around her waist. She stretches, raises her arms upward and offers her face and bust to the warm caress of this late morning sun.</p><p>"hmm…"</p><p>Her long hair cascaded down to the bottom of her back, tangled around her waist, too straight to stay wisely behind her back like wavy hair would have done. The rays of the sun play in her hair, bouncing from one strand to the other dancing from one reflection to another of her locks and suddenly making her long chestnut hair shine sometimes a little auburn sometimes a little golden clear. In the light that illuminates this feminine silhouette, you can see that she is not wearing much except the panties hidden under the sheet.</p><p>She leans over the bed, probably looking for the slightly too large T-shirt that covered her when she went to bed and that she surely took off during the night, suffering from the heat of this mid-summer. She finally unearthed it rolled into a ball at the foot of the bed, hidden by a section of the sheet. Suddenly, she turns around, blinks sometimes and sets her alarm clock which goes off just then.</p><p>"8:00 am I have to get ready"</p><p>"A shower I need a shower"</p><p>She gets up, slowly slides her long legs out of the sheet, grabs the neglected t-shirt and walks softly towards a door leading to the bathroom; little white paws accompanying him and twirling around his legs all along. The jet of water was soon heard by the door that was ajar. In the shower, water flows on the young woman, it falls on her face, on her skin, on her hair, drenching it little by little, drop by drop, weighing down her hair, sliding on her curves, on her legs, between his toes until the heat of the water eventually fogs up the cabin windows.</p><p>"Pffff" she sighs.</p><p>
  <em>This dream so real so tangible ... and so false ... so impossible no it's not a dream ... A fantasy ... a persistent ghost ... a wish ... something that never will be...</em>
</p><p>But these painful memories are nothing more than vague reminiscences of a bittersweet era, troubled by a past which she had not chosen but which brought her to where she is.</p><p>As she prepares to leave the shower, the dream comes back in force That of an embrace, big and tender hands, so warm, so passionate, with burning, burning lips, everywhere, full of ardour. The memory of an odour, a sweetness, a warmth; with a passion so strong that it overwhelms the senses. The memory so strong that it is imbued with it on her skin and in her mind. But it is only the memory of a dream, not a real memory. She suddenly hit the wall with the back of her hand and furiously turned the knob of water towards cold trying in vain to clear up the ideas and to evaporate the overly persistent images of a dream from another time, from another world; where it would have been possible. Then she quickly left the cabin muttering in her beard.</p><p> </p><p>"I'm going to go crazy ..." she sighs.</p><p>Then realizing that she was talking to herself:</p><p>"Correction, I probably already have a grain of natural so with that ... It will not work out better, she continued aloud while wrapping herself in a towel.</p><p>"Miaow… Said the white fur ball while trotting behind long legs dripping with water</p><p>"Yes-Yes… I know you're hungry-she said while drying herself. She put on a very light blue shirt, a little wide, which went down to the top of her thighs and aesthetically folded the sleeves of the said shirt at the elbows so as not to be too hot. She then puts on light jeans and light summer shoes with laces on the front. She still had a little trouble adjusting her clothes to her body, her curves having surprisingly grown in last recent years. Nothing unbearable, fortunately. Her breast had grown up a size and her hips had took a few curves but her body had kept a slender and thin appearance although more muscular than in the past.</p><p>Not to mention that she had made a frightening growth spurt given the fact that she was now one meter and seventy-seven centimetres. It was still uncomfortable for her to get used to it after spending most of her life in a petite body. So she would often end up in wider clothes for her size. After some disgraceful experiences she had renounced ever tempting to get something where she had a doubt it could be too tight or short. Result in her getting comfy with slightly wider clothes.</p><p> </p><p>Her style had changed, gradually transforming her wardrobe. It had to. Between slowly getting more adult and her horrendous growth. Her tastes going step by step towards something more mature and distinguished. Which did honour to her actress status without bundling her up and allowed her to be at ease most of the time. A fairly simple style but not devoid of elegance.</p><p>Snow squirmed hastily around her feet, pushing loud meows to beg for food.</p><p>Snow ... Wait, I'm going to feed you, but let me at least reach the kibbles she said vaguely trying to drag her legs from beneath the white fur balls that had decided to sit on her feet. Then abandoning the idea, she took the young cat and placed it on the work plan.</p><p>"Meowww ... meow-meow replied Snow.</p><p>I know, keep running, I'm hungry. Minute, minute, it's coming. And she went in search of the bag of kibble.</p><p>The apartment she lived in, traversed by the rays of the sun coming from the glass doors of the garden and the many windows, was bright and very airy; the kitchen and the living room facing each other without any doors giving an overall view and a feeling of enlarged space. But if the loft in itself seemed magnificent, it exuded a sort of solitude, a lack of something.</p><p>Which was nothing unusual because over time, the young woman had become quite independent but also somewhat lonely. She did not complain about it, however, and had even come to appreciate the moments when she could be alone with herself - her job being little conducive to calm and tranquillity.</p><p>She fed the cat, took an orange juice for her and some rusk with cheese and tomato and was ready to leave her keys in hands when her phone rang.</p><p> </p><p>She answered and a sparkling voice of mischief spoke in her ear.</p><p>"Hello dear,</p><p>It's time.</p><p>Kyoko sighed. He could be so stubborn. She hadn't talk to him in years but he was still the same. She had sincerely hoped to be able to renew her contract for a moment. To have more time. She really feared what would happen.</p><p>"I know," she replied anyway. "I will speak to the agency today to modify the contract and find an arrangement"</p><p>"At least one third-time"</p><p>"You will not accept anything less anyway, whatever I say, whatever I think ..." she grumbled.</p><p>"I see you understand me well. I really can't wait to see you again"</p><p>Kyoko pushed her long hair back with her fingers, falling before her eyes as usual.</p><p>"Just to be able to laugh at my dependents again, Boss ..." she guessed.</p><p>"An old man must know how to entertain ... he conceded. But that's not the only reason. I am excited to see the young woman and actress you became"</p><p>She perceived all the cunning joy that he conceived of it and decided on the spot to tell her as little as possible about the details and the date of this future trip. Just the way he could welcome her arrival gave her hives.</p><p>Hanging up after other growls, she took her scripts, kissed her cat on the corner of the ear accompanied by a "see you tonight" and she went out towards the little car she had rented for several years. The poor thing sputtered when starting but Kyoko didn't care. She preferred to put the money she earned in a vehicle she really liked to drive rather than in a stupid car.</p><p>It was going to be a long day. She had to go to the agency for the contract and reorganize her schedule to finish what she could for the past few months and see how to continue those that would last longer. She was also expected on set to shoot several scenes from the A special detective series in which she was playing at the moment and she had lunch with Kayla to whom she was to announce the news.</p><p> </p><p>…</p><p>Thousands of kilometres away, fifteen hours earlier, in a room of a luxury apartment, located in an imposing building, the day also dawns in this place.</p><p>Light pierces through the embrasure of the curtains to light the top of a gigantic bed lost itself in an infinitely large room. The glare of the sun falls on a face, warms it, dazzles it and ends up disturbing the deep sleep of the person sleeping there.</p><p>He tightens his eyelids, strong, his brown hair falls on his eyes when he moves; he turns around, sticks his nose in the pillow with a growl of protest, his large muscles are outlined under the sheet. Feet attached to long, endless legs stick out from under the duvet. Feet that move, wiggle and turn when the man places himself on his stomach. The long toes stirring a little to the caress of the breeze escaping from the window which remained open. His big hands with long muscular but finely sculpted fingers grab the pillow, the sheet, the mattress. His body tightens, twists, clinging desperately to something that keeps on escaping him and ends up running away from him definitively when the mists of sleep finally leave him.</p><p>"No ... he whispers. He reaches out, runs his fingers through the air trying to catch the dream that goes away one last time. His hand falls heavily on the mattress, the noise muffled by the thickness of it.</p><p>He gets up with a groan, sitting half cross-legged on the edge of the bed. He runs his long fingers through his hair, worthy of the most beautiful nest of birds after the eventful night he has just spent.</p><p>"I'm losing it" he thought, realizing at the same time that his efforts to forget her were from the beginning very fruitless and that it was time to see reality in the face if he wanted to be able to endure it.</p><p>The man gets up, goes to the adjacent room, throw his sleepwear in the laundry basket and run the freezing water from the shower directly on his head before getting out of the shower, grabbing a towel he casually casts on his shoulder letting a trail of water fall behind him as he heads for the closet.</p><p><em>It is 4.30 am ... I have an appointment at 6.30 am ... I am on time</em> He thought when he started getting ready.</p><p>For the past few years, his days had gotten even busier, Ren drowning again and again more and more in the work without even being aware of it.</p><p>"What are you doing?" He thought as he ran the towel through his hair, over his broad shoulders, over the drops dripping down his chest, his finely chiselled muscles on his back; lower on the arch of her thighs and legs until finally dying at her feet and soaking the floor. But, chasing the thought as fast as it had come, shaking his head, he grabbed a light shirt, soft pants and not too warm, repeating like a mantra in his head not to venture on this kind of ground and think of something else.</p><p>As he finished dressing and gave up the tie, opting for a more casual style today and especially less warm, his thoughts were once again drawn to a single subject, to a single concern, to a single person; towards the one who was the object, the goddess of his dreams.</p><p>Turning around and leaning his upper back on the wardrobe, he let his head rest back and closed his eyes, tortured.</p><p>"Nearly 5 years"</p><p>He curses himself internally. He could say what he wanted, everything that could concern her clung to him like a second skin since his heart clung to her. His body, his dreams, his nights, his days, his mind and his heart yearned for one thing and only one: her.</p><p>He might hide them, deny them, bury them in the depths of his being, pretend they did not exist; they would persist, over and over and even stronger if that were possible. And if he was ever tempted to forget this truth, his passionate dreams and tumultuous nights would be there to remind him of it.</p><p>The frowning, the pursed mouth and the fingers clumsily passed through his still damp hair are all marks of his inner turmoil. His face displayed a painful expression that reflected a tiny part of what his heart kept screaming silently while he deliberately ignored him; for lack of being able to do anything there. For a few seconds, his control and his mask break, showing all the pain and lack he is experiencing right now, before the actor's face resurfaces, the emotions transmitted by his face a few seconds earlier already forgotten, erased; although only ingeniously concealed by humans. Deeply rooted in him but well hidden.</p><p>Tired of stirring up a truth he already knew and kept rehashing, hoping maybe it would be different, he headed for the kitchen, counting on a very dark coffee and his hours of play at two different studios and his two shoots to send away his gloomy ideas; at least during the day. He drank his instant coffee in fourth gear, grabbed his keys, a jacket just in case, his scripts and left the apartment in his powerful smooth model walk.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So yeah…I'm using the fact that I made her father a foreigner to put make her grew a lot. A grow of that sort isn't a generality but it can happen. And did you know that sometimes a girl or boy growth can be retarded because of an unhealthy environment? Well, yes, it can. I knew and I used that too as an explanation as to why she could have a growth spurt as her child and teenage years were far from healthy. <br/>Anyway, for those who will worry. No, I'm not changing it all. She's still Kyoko. Golden eyes, golden hairs but longer. Slim but muscular. Just a little curvier as told above.<br/>And concerning her personality, don't worry it will still be Kyoko too. More mature yes. More experienced in acting and life yes. But still oblivious to her charm. Still fond of fairytales. In short the core of who she is will be still there. You will see it for yourself. But I wanted to experience what a mature version of Kyoko could be. It a recurrent idea to me so I couldn't help anymore.<br/>For several reasons that I won't describe to you in fear it would spoil you beside one. Did you ever felt like Kyoko didn't live enough, didn't experience life enough? I did. <br/>How to say it, I'm one of the rare fan that don't especially want Ren and Kyoko together yet. Because as there are now even in love with the other, I can't picture them together as a couple sometimes. There is like a misalignment between the two. And don't make me say what I didn't. I think Kyoko is mature in a lot of points. But besides liking acting, does she know herself? Did she experience life really? No, not to me at least. It wasn't possible while she was dedicating her life to Sho or her mother. She's just beginning as an actress and that's a new world to understand.<br/>So that's the reason of the time skip.<br/>I mean, both characters have a very low self-esteem and it's something too rooted in them to be touch so a confession seemed often too unlikely as they are. Ren is afraid to hurt her, for her to not be ready. Afraid to loose her, afraid of her reject. More or less persuaded of it.Kyoko is afraid of his reject, afraid to be hurt, persuaded it's not possible. Both are convinced they're not really lovable.<br/>So in my twist mind I chose another way to make them closer by keeping them apart first, yes I know. XD.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0030"><h2>30. A peek into their lifes-part 1-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He finished his email and closed his laptop.        </p><p>Ren smiled, they would be happy to hear from him and to know that he had arrived on Scottish soil for the filming of his new role. He had re-established a semblance of contact with his parents for three years. It wasn't much but he couldn't take it anymore and it was the least he could do after all this time. Ren hoped that coming back would take him less time but he knew that in the end, it was without doubt for the better. Even now, he had no idea how to talk to them when he saw them face to face.</p><p>He always avoided calls. He missed his parents but he only allowed himself emails with them. At least, like that, he could talk about everything and nothing without having to tackle the annoying subjects. He was so afraid of disappointing them.</p><p>But at the same time, such joy crossed him from the simple emails they exchanged.</p><p>He hadn't planned to contact them before actually returning but time had passed, weeks, months and finally years. Loneliness had consumed him since she left. Much more than before I knew it. Before, he was not even aware of it, being alone had always been natural for him, now she haunted him. He took refuge inside only to silence the deafening noise from outside. But even when he enjoyed his only company, she was always there with a friend, nostalgia, pain. As if loneliness, her lifelong friend, had become a double-edged sword.</p><p>He had called her of course. Every two weeks at first but she was distant and wouldn't still talk about what happened. Then, three months into her acting stage, she got into an American agency. He knew it would happen, she had so much talent. He was proud of her but she started to be much busier and he was not outdone on his side.</p><p>Time passed and he ended up calling her only once a month. He felt that she wanted this distance and refrains from being too pushy. Because, during their conversations, she spoke less and less of her, always evoking more vaguely the roles and jobs that she got. Then the circumstances made them begin to miss certain calls. She called him back later, but the time periods without him getting any longer increased. And as she had stopped confiding in him, Ren had felt the fear of losing contact again taking hold of him.</p><p>Even on the phone, he noticed that she was changing. Her voice was slightly less acute, her way of speaking became different. Sometimes he felt like it was his kyoko he was talking to, and other times he felt like she was becoming a whole different person. She didn't let him in anymore, didn't leave any more openings on how she felt. Just talking on the phone made him waver this past year. He had barely heard him half a dozen times and was asked if he would lose the connection he had with her despite his best efforts. He'd even gotten angry when she denied keeping her distance. Begging with angriness to know the source of this avoidance.</p><p>Oh, how much had he dreamed of going to find her, to go to see her, if only once ...</p><p>He had bought several plane tickets, money wasted on each of his aborted attempts where he had turned around. It was not a question of desiring it with all his might, nothing would have prevented him from seeing her if it had been up to him. But the memory of a conversation in which he had tried to rush the subject came back to him each time. There had been such sadness in her voice. She had pleaded with him to understand. That she needed time on her own. And he had known.</p><p>Right then, right there that no matter how much it killed him, how much that gap between them undermined him, hanging on to her like he did hurt her. She was rebuilding herself, he had realized that. But the emptiness of her absence could not be erased. Her smile, her voice, her eyes, the exchanges they shared ... The slightest idea, the slightest memory of her remained with him at all times. Her words engraved in him followed him ... Her words, one of the only things that remained today ... The words that continued to push him, push him to move forward, to not to let go.</p><p>Today, he could no longer say that he knew who she was, what she had become ... And that was tearing him apart from the inside ... He could accept that they could not be more… but the idea of not even knowing her anymore ...</p><p>He had followed her advice though ... The words that had helped him so much.</p><p>He had tried his best to open up to others.</p><p>In tribute to Rick and her.</p><p>He couldn't really feel complete without her but he was doing his best to keep going.</p><p>He had obtained jobs all over the world, Italy, France, England and even in Russia, he was careful to scrupulously avoid the United States for now. But he knew it wouldn't last longer, soon he would have no choice but to go. For a bit more than three years he had become an international actor and well-known at that. He had focused on Europe or other part of the world but the time was coming. He had already started model for American brands again.</p><p>He closed the door behind him as he got out of the room.</p><p>Maybe he would cross her path…Maybe he would see her…Maybe…was unlikely. But Maybe was all that remained in his heart. Her words and a maybe.</p><p>His phone rang and he picked up to the thunderous annoying voice of kijima and the more subdued deeper one of Taku in the background groaning at the loudness.</p><p>He grinned inwardly and greeted them. The expression whitened by a pale sadness but a brave crooked smile screwed to his lips and a merry perfect tone in the voice. He was happy to hear them it's just that sometimes the heart was not there with them. He had taken the step of accepting other people nearby. But the more he let them approach, the more difficult it was for him to hide the emptiness in the depths of his being.</p><p>"Hi guys"</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Enjoy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0031"><h2>31. A peek into their lifes-part 2-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Back home after her lunch with Kayla, Kyoko put down some things and took advantage of the next hour to take a stroll on the beach. She had lived in the magnificent city of San-Francisco for five years but nothing took her breath more than the vast blue as far as the eye could see.</p><p> Main reason why she lived outside the city. that and the fact that despite the fifteen minute journey to reach the city, it was still faster than living in the city and having to hit at least an hour of traffic jam to make a stupid kilometre.</p><p>She had bought this large apartment 4 years earlier. She never thought she could afford it, but the place had been abandoned because of the distance from the city. Above all, although the foundations such as the walls and roof were in perfect condition, the interior was in a ruin. But as a result of which, the asking price had been a boon. Nobody wanted it and by inquiring a little, she quickly discovered that the seller was ready to give up.</p><p>However, it was a secluded corner, the building barely above the level of the beach and so close to it that Kyoko only had to descend the small dune to be on the sand facing the ocean. She even saw him from her bedroom window, and with that ridiculous price ...Kyoko was sure she could repay in 6 to 7 years at the time if she continued to earn a living playing, with the correct amount she earned.</p><p>Kyoko signed right away and instead of what she estimated, she paid it back in three years and spent two of them also renovating the inside. Her wages as an actress increased as the number of roles she played piled up.</p><p>She wandered, wading her feet in the sea as she enjoyed both the view and the path she had travelled in recent years. She was very happy with her progress as an actress even if her ability to blend in with her character often prevented her from being recognized.</p><p>Kyoko breathed a last breath of iodized air as she climbed the worn wooden steps again which was still just attached to their fixation in the dune.</p><p>The weather was splendid. A little hot but the vagrant and recurrent wind from the coast made it possible to withstand the heat.</p><p>She looked up at the cloudless sky through the window as she retrieved her things.it was worth it, no question of not enjoying such a magnificent day.</p><p>She took the bare minimum: the script, her cell phone, water, and put on the black leather jacket over her thin shirt. She went through the small door leading to the garage and removed the tarp from big silver engine. Then she opened the sliding door at the press of a button.</p><p>Grabbing the keys and her helmet, Kyoko lifted her leg to get on the bike and started the engine. She was leaving a bit early, hopefully, she might even catch a glimpse of some fairies dancing on the water while she was riding. The engine roared when she activated first gear and Kyoko grinned widely when air surged in her long golden hair.</p><p>She thought back to her conversation with Kayla and her violent reaction when Kyoko had to tell her the news.</p><p>Kayla, she was going to be missed by her. Such a warm person even if she had no respect for Kyoko's private life, whatever the circumstances. She refrained from shaking her head. It was stupid. It wasn't like she would never come back. A third of his time would be there again, but the majority would still be here.</p><p>She made the engine roar again.</p><p>She wanted to enjoy this as long as she can. She wouldn't be able to do this anymore in three months. Or at least, not as often. She doubted Japan would be as easy as here to drive a bike.</p><p>She sighed in her helmet and accelerated. She missed him so much. She had to do herself violence so as not to call him, not to think of him, not to even answer his calls.</p><p>Not that it worked but she was trying. In fact, she had tried everything.</p><p>Absolutely everything.</p><p>But even the distance, absence and lack of contact was not enough to get him out of his heart. Today she had given up.</p><p> Abandoned the idea of one day no longer feeling such emotion for this man. It was simply impossible. It was even worse than before. And she had kept as little contact as possible, the mere minimum she could handle without growing crazy from the longing.</p><p>Not knowing exactly what he was doing was driving her crazy and she had bitten her tongue several times so as not to give free rein to the torrent of questions she wanted to ask him. And more came as she had discovered from this world so much, the show business world, since she lived here. She didn't live in L.A but she had already had to go there and San-Francisco was not completely different. It was always the same world. A little less wild but the same principle.</p><p>The pain and respect she felt for him had tripled to know that he had to grow up in the middle of it all. It wasn't all that bad. There were a lot more of opportunities, a lot more of possibilities, of freedom but the environment wasn't always the best neither the most fair one and Kyoko couldn't applaud herself more to have decided to live a bit away from everything and everyone and to not have decide to go living in L.A.</p><p>Still thinking of him Kyoko gave up refraining her thoughts and turned on the music from some CD of her, singing to it and pouring her feelings to the wind while she drove.</p><p>It had become kind of an addiction. When she wasn't playing a role, she was mostly on her own doing things. It was that way she had got addicted to biking. She had to play a role that required to drive a motorbike but when she finally learned how to do it she loved it so much she passed the license. She learned climbing like that too.</p><p>And when she wasn't learning new things Kyoko was unwinding at the gym or singing. After what happened in Japan she had considered it obligatory to learn how to fend for herself. She took self-defences courses, Karate and Judo ones too. She wasn't an absolute expert but she was good enough to defend herself when needed and to be able to do realistic fight scenes too.</p><p>Then, there was the singing. It just came like that. Because of him mostly. She was frustrated and missed him too much so she put words to her feelings then voice then song. It was just to unwind. She would write it down, compose a little melody with the mere knowledges she had in it and guitar or piano and that was it. She would stock the sheets away without telling anyone or caring the less. She knew she could sing right but it wasn't anything more.</p><p>But then they fought, badly, over the phone and she was so shaken by it that she made a big mistake and decided to record it. She didn't even remember the damn reason why. But she knew what it did. It nailed the damn on her coffin.</p><p>Kyoko shifted the bike to the right to take the road to the set, still sulking and grumbling when she remembered it.</p><p>She parked and cut the power off under the awe eyes of some boy drooling at her motorbike, removing the helmet she brushed away her locks from her face again and took bag and script before heading to the entry as she cursed inside for the million time how she got tricked into being a singer, the riskiest thing for her. Now even more conscious of how dangerous it would become in the future.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>PS: Yup, I totally made her badass. I love Kyoko when she's independent and I wanted to explore this and push it further. So here it is, hope you will like it as much as I do. So totally love to have Kyoko ride a bike.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0032"><h2>32. chapter 32</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was Friday evening.</p><p>Kyoko was returning from her last job and taking advantage of the not too short days, she had ventured on the small turning roads which skirted the sea. The glow of the setting sun projected her redness on the sparkling water of reflections and she was tempted by closing my eyes was only a second. The intoxicating sensation of roaring in the background and the wind blowing on her face as she put on the turns again and again.</p><p>Faster, ever faster, forgetful of everything that was not here and now made her feel more alive than ever and filled the gap she had in her when she lingered on too many thoughts. The residual heat of the end of the day was caressing the part of her face that the helmet did not protect but blinded by the light she grabbed the handlebars firmly with one hand and let go of the left side to quickly pass the sunglasses.</p><p>It was not as hot anymore. It was the end of September, there was only one month left before her departure.</p><p>                                      </p><p>She was approaching the path to her apartment when she turned on the radio.</p><p>The subjects discussed were far from encouraging, but a name caught her attention. "<em>The second appeal procedure for Cedric Bennet just got rejected by the Court. </em></p><p>The judges have always been unanimous and had no intention of being lenient already since the first trial having sentenced him to 15 years in prison for rape and assault on many young actresses and young women when he was still himself in the field of show business.</p><p><em>We recall that first charges were brought against him during a filming of his uncle during which abuses would have already been reported more than five years earlier. It was only after this that some victims began to speak and file complaints</em> explained the journalist in front of the court at the very moment to report the end of this sordid story.</p><p>
  <em>However, his network of connections in the field with influential people on the sets and the lack of evidence due to the time spent between the acts and the complaints had allowed him to escape trial and keep doubt there. It was only the awkward confession of a young Japanese woman of the same background, today detained in psychiatric institution in Japan, his lover of the time who gave sufficient evidence to charge him. She would have, according to the time, flipped out in public when Mr. Bennet broke up with her saying that she had done what he wanted and that he had been able to hooked up with her and that he no longer needed her. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Apparently she would have try to murder him at the time and when it didn't work out, she reported what she knew to the police bringing blatant proofs with her.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Fortunately, Mr.Bennet won't hurt anyone anymore but we want to remind everyone that this sort of abuses in the world of glitters and sets are unfortunately all too frequent as young people often found themselves pressured to give sexual favour or accept the intolerable things to get a role. This sort of thing isn't normal, it's totally wrong and if anyone witness or is a person being victim of any form of abuse by anyone, being a director, a famous actor or an influent person; please call the xxxx or warn the nearest authorities.</em>
</p><p>She parked the motorcycle and climbed out from the machine breathing heavily as the journalist finished his explanations. Kyoko hadn't known he had made appeal. But it was such a relief that it had failed. It was one less twisted person in the world. She laid her behind on the bike and breathed for a while as she processed the information. It was over. Or she still felt weak sometimes and once in a while she still had nightmares but it was over. She even remembered when Lory had called her. When he had told him he had filled a complaint and a file to his best agent and to the police. When he had called later to tell her that thanks to the ADN found on her clothes and them trying to do it again, they would be condemned and would go to jail. It was four year ago but she still remembered those calls so clearly.</p><p>She had started the fighting courses and was not as much in a bad place as before when he called. She did boxes at the time and imagined her assaulter each and every single time. Punching them. Growling at the pain growing as she strained her muscles without break. Again and again until she was so out of breath she had to lay on the ground. Hurting herself several time in the process.</p><p>So when the second call came, she felt a big alleviation from it. Really. She knew no more people would hurt or abused by those men. But she also knew it wasn't done. Because with time she had remember other things from the incident, nightmares helping. She had recollected the distinct feminine voice she had heard, the familiar irking one. The one from Kimiko Morizumi.</p><p>She was the one to call and warn the president of what she had remembered this time and he promised to be careful and to net anyone from his agency come close to her but without proof and beside her efforts for months she was beyond reach because of her links. Until she messed up a year later and blabbered everything Bennet-san did and her own deeds too. She was supposed to go to prison but after the betrayal of her lover she had seemed to lost it and her family opted for craziness rather than jail.</p><p> She put the bike away in the garage when she was calmer and entered her home.</p><p>A whirlwind of café-au-lait skin and wavy dark brown hair jumped on her when she stepped in and she recognized who it was instantly.</p><p>"Kayla, could you please stop breaking into my house when I'm not here?" Kyoko demanded with a resigned sigh knowing even if she asked it wouldn't work. "How did you get in?" she asked at last.</p><p>"You let you backdoor unlock again" replied the charming woman with a smile and a glitter in her grey eyes though she still shrugged. Her friend was wearing a short top on her big curves that uncovered her belly, a long wavy skirt reaching the knees and high heels beige sandals. She was a warm person, a bit nosy and too curious for her own good. She really really had no respect for boundaries once you were friend with her and could be clingy in some ways sometimes. Though not often. She was her best friend in America.</p><p>The woman twirl and went into Kyoko's fridge for something to eat blabbing on the way.</p><p>"I can't believe you're leaving. I know you will be here at least half of the time but it won't be the same" She grumbled at she stuffed her mouth with food Kyoko cooked yesterday. "God, your food is as heavenly as usual, I should just pay you to feed me"</p><p>Kyoko shook her head slightly but a warm resisting grin still made her way to her face. She was still fond of her of course. She was annoying but Kyoko couldn't push her away.</p><p>She chuckled a bit.</p><p>"Even if you payed me I wouldn't do it. I would never have peace otherwise"                 kyoko said raising her chin high in pretence.</p><p>Kayla munched over the last bit of her rests and turned a wet finger to her.</p><p>"That's mean. If I didn't visit you time to time you would lock yourself for months and I would see you until next year between your job and your loner attitude"</p><p>Kyoko rolled her eyes at her and dropped her thing on the counter. She knew it was a bit true but you couldn't help who you were and she enjoyed being alone. Maybe a bit too much.</p><p>"Speaking of making you get out of this place…Do you want to go out tonight?" proposed her friend with a nasty smile.</p><p>Kyoko dropped her backside on the carpet near the couch and started petting Snow. She shook her head tiredly. She wasn't fond of clubs most of the time. She had to go to some for research purposes for roles but didn't like it. Well she did go once or two with Kayla. But the only ones she loved were classy ones, the ones playing jazz or soft rock in the background and where you could still read if you wanted or meet colleagues from jobs or just enjoy soft music. Howling music and sweating glued to others weren't her thing at all. She wanted out of those clubs as soon as she entered.</p><p>"I prefer to keep my hearing, thanks"</p><p>"You are no fun" Pouted Kayla but she still came near her and plopped down on Kyoko's couch.</p><p>Kyoko bent backward and laid down on the carpet. Her cat jumped at the occasion and curled on her belly. For a while, she enjoyed the grateful silence as Kayla didn't say a word anymore. It was such a rarity. It wasn't that she mind all the time but Kyoko had hoped to rest on her own and it had been a long day. Still as long as she didn't assault her with words Kyoko was content she was there.</p><p>The distinct click of a shutter echoed suddenly and Kyoko growled aloud. It was the other annoying thing that came with Kayla.</p><p>Her friend was a professional photographer but she couldn't help herself but to take people pictures. Not on professional shootings. In private. All the time. Whatever she wanted and wherever she wanted. Even in the most inappropriate situations.</p><p>The shutter resonated several more times and Kyoko having enough of it put her arm on her face. "Stop taking pictures me"</p><p>"But you are such a good model to take…See the t-shirt rode up just a bit showing just a band of skin between your jeans and your ample off-shoulders shirt, barely covering what needs to be covered.. And your chest is rising and you can distinctly see you aren't wearing a bra. It's sexy. And so you. I don't know who advised you to put a bit large clothes and not wearing anything but it was well-inspired" Kayla said with a professional analyse while she continued to take pictures"</p><p>Kyoko blushed profusely and raised her hand to block the camera lens.</p><p>"Stop fucking take picture of me, Kayla Myler!" She shouted.</p><p>"Come on, it's only one or two more…I have a complete book of you and several files on computer" Kayla said trying to soothe it.</p><p>Kyoko choked and was ready to break the devise when the phone in Kyoko's pocket rang at that moment and Kyoko lift herself to a sitting position.</p><p>Winkling the thing out of her jeans she looked at the caller and her eyes grew like saucers. She hesitated. She had make a promise to herself. To keep her distance wherever she would be. But it had been nearly three months since she heard him. She had avoided his others calls. She didn't need to tell him what would happen. And she had missed him greatly.</p><p>She picked up.</p><p>"H-Hi" She awkwardly answered.</p><p>Someone choke on the other side and took a deep breath.</p><p>"<em>Hi Kyoko</em>" his deep voice echoed in the devise and couldn't help the joy bubbling instantly in her heart to hear his voice.</p><p>"Wow…Now, that's a smile commented Kayla on the side-lines. Kyoko ignored her.</p><p>"<em>Someone is with you?"</em> he asked.</p><p>She cleared her throat with a cough.</p><p>"Yes. It's a friend"</p><p>"<em>I see"</em> he said and his voice sound neutral all of sudden. "<em>Am I calling at a bad time?"</em></p><p>She shook her head and then realising she was doing it again answered verbally. She still had this weird habit to do that over phone.</p><p>"No. She was leaving"</p><p>"I'm not leaving" countered Kayla as the shutter re-started its annoying sounds again.</p><p>"Kayla!"</p><p>"Keep talking, don't mind me, I just want to capture this"</p><p>Kyoko groaned and she heard Ren chuckled.</p><p>"<em>Your friend seems to be fun</em>"He stated, clearly amused.</p><p>"It's a way to put it" Kyoko said, shouting daggers at Kayla.</p><p>He chuckled again and said something but suddenly Kayla was clinging to her, her arms around her mid-riff and showing her the pictures on her camera.</p><p>"Who is it? Who is it? " Her friend urged in a whisper. "Tell who is the person able to make you do such faces?!Tell me!"</p><p>She shhhed Kayla. "Shut up"</p><p>"How are you, Ren?"</p><p>But her friend wouldn't let her in piece so Kyoko didn't catch the answer.</p><p>"Could you repeat that in a minute? Kayla is leaving. I'm going to kick her out and I'm be back"</p><p>"<em>Okay</em>" he said very merrily and Kyoko wondered was he was so happy suddenly. She didn't know that for the first time in years he had a glimpse of her life, of her friends. He was so happy to hear and be the witness of such a thing. He didn't even know she could be annoyed with a friend. Even her irritated voice was honey to his ears. And with the deeper tone she had got since a few years…it was very attractive.</p><p>He heard shouts and grumbled and laughed aloud. Happy for once. The crew with who he was on a break looked at him weirdly.</p><p>She came back shortly after.</p><p>"Sorry for that" she breathed heavily.</p><p>He took a deep inspiration. She was seducing him over the phone, without even trying. Yup, it was really Kyoko. And he was so far gone.</p><p>"<em>No problem</em>" He said, his voice as neutral as possible but failing.</p><p>The director called for him at the moment they were going to resume their conversation and he sighed sadly.</p><p>"I'm sorry, I'm expected on set, the director just called for me" Ren apologized.</p><p>"Don't worry" Kyoko in a bit too quiet voice. "I understand"</p><p>The director called again and frustration edged inside him. It wasn't a patient one and he was getting on everyone nerves.</p><p>"I will call back, okay?"</p><p>"Okay" Kyoko said warmly and he hung up. She knew it was for the best and it was even easier to make it into small talk this time but why couldn't she feel satisfied with it? Why couldn't she help to wish to talk more with him?</p><p>She shook her head. She knew better.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0033"><h2>33. Return-part 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A suitcase in hand, a shoulder bag on the other side and a crate with her cat, Kyoko passed the gates of San Francisco airport. Ticket stuck between the teeth, she went to the security checks. Snow slept in his box, not happy but resigned to her situation so unworthy of her rank. She removed her sweater which despites its large turtle neck was far too warm inside the plane. She had opted for an adaptable wear and dressed with thin not too tight slim faded jeans, light blue longue sleeves t-shirt and her turtle neck sweater. It was not nearly enough for the weather here, especially the thin jeans and she had been freezing all the while before entering the airport but she knew it would be warmer in Japan so dressing too warm would have been just a delayed pain.</p><p>Once installed on the plane, she sighed nervousness.</p><p>Yet she knew it didn't make sense. HE would not be there. He must have been in Scotland at the moment. At least, that's what she thought she understood from the little news they had exchanged. So being jumpy was ridiculous and completely unnecessary. She wasn't even angsty about seeing everyone else. She would be glad to see them. Well, she had actually saw Kanae a couples of times those last years. Three or four in the first two years and still one more time two years ago. And they had talked over the phone. Not quite as often as Kyoko would have wished but as it was what she had wished for she couldn't complaint. She didn't take a step away only from Ren when she left but from everyone in Japan. She needed a new start. She hadn't keep touch with anyone beside Kanae and Ren time to time.</p><p>Her smile was crooked half-bitterly. When was the last time she called her Moko-san? She didn't remember. She began to call her friend Kanae in her head for a while now. Maybe on one of the times they met after she left. The very last time she saw her she was already calling her by her name. Not that she minds and Kanae certainly didn't either. She didn't even remember when it shifted, it just happened. But with her return, a few things were brought back to her and the difference between then and now was striking. She couldn't imagine call her that anymore. She couldn't imagine do so many things she would have done without a second thought before.</p><p>Kyoko chuckled inwardly. Well, no one would prevent her to buy fairytales books or watch magic shows on tv still. She loved those more than anything and could still see her fairies friends each time she would go outside.</p><p>Still, she acknowledged the changes. Her style was different. Her pace too and even if it killed her to accept that Kayla might be right about this, yes, she had become quite the lonely wolf. Again, not that she minds.</p><p>She was just blown away with how things used to be.</p><p>But she was also impatient. She wondered how Chiori was. She knew through Kanae she had made up with acting and played a lot of comic characters bringing her a lot of success and that she had even started dating recently though Kanae couldn't tell if it was serious and who it was.</p><p>She was kind of curious as to how Maria-chan was too and hoped she could forgive her for her prolonged absence. She wanted to see her formers landlords. She had missed them greatly even if Kyoko had learned they had rent her former room again. It had saddened her but she knew it was unavoidable. Plus, even if they hadn't, she was aware she wouldn't have been able to go back to there. It would too small for her and with her cat. It was impossible. Things could not go back to what they were. In reading of that she had already found an apartment to settle right away when she would arrive. But she was resolved to go greet them at least if they agreed to.</p><p>In short, she had only reasons to rejoice mostly and nothing to worry about.</p><p>She was set on keeping away from a certain person so even if against all probabilities he was not abroad, she wouldn't reach out to him.</p><p>That was she managed to convince herself of after a few hours of plane and it's with a little more serenity that she approached the journey.</p><p>Falling asleep, she decided it wasn't worth worrying over nothing and try to bundle up in a comfortable situation. No matter how many times she took the plane, not used to the difference of height from before she grew.</p><p>She grinned peacefully, remembering she hadn't warned anyone about the date of her return so that she could avoid effusions such as an over-dramatic president. At the least she would set foot on Japan grounds with the confidence of being untroubled.</p><p>…</p><p>Descending the stairs of the unit, her feet touched ground and she infused air into her lungs, rediscovering its flavour, freshness; astonished to feel like embracing a familiar home again while still under the impression to be foreign to it.</p><p>Snow clawed at her cage grid pulling back her owner to earth. She smiled and her longs legs carried new steps in an old home and moved forward.</p><p>The clement wind played with her strands bringing other used-to-know odours and made her relieve herself of her sweater without delay and she retrieved her luggage shortly after that.</p><p>She was planning to go straight to her new flat to unpack where the leaseholder and the remaining of her bags were maybe already waiting but her phone rang.</p><p>           </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0034"><h2>34. Return-part 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The tenant having called to warn and apologize concerning the apartment which would only be available in a few hours, Kyoko decided to rather start by going to the agency. The president had already indicated to her that he would have several job offers as soon as she arrived and it was just as well that she went to read them directly. The only problem would be for Snow for whom it might be a little long but she was well educated and Kyoko had a leash so she was already planning to get her out a little if she had the agreement of the president.</p><p>Once arrived, she discarded her suitcase in one of the big lockers of the parking lot and put back her pullover finding the weather in Tokyo a bit chiller than at Narita. Jacket on the arm, shoulder bag on the other and cat in one hand, she pulled inside the building.</p><p>…</p><p>The noisy interior of the agency, the pace of feet in constant motion, the incessant rustling of people, their voices; all these sounds gradually stopped as the heads turned. Looks were lost on a tall figure, whispering fell silent.</p><p>Certain looks became brilliant, others astonished but all lingered progressively on one and the same person. Intrigued ... One question in mind, who was she?</p><p>The elegant port, she moved in great relaxed strides, seemingly lost in her own world and clearly unconscious of the uproar it caused around her. Her light steps carried her with a brush in the distance. Her feet flirting with the ground rather than borrowing it as she disappeared at the corner of a corridor.</p><p>By no means constrained by her luggage, the tall figure in long golden hair evaporated like a dream leaving behind a cloud of bewildered people, dazzled by the apparition they just saw.</p><p>It took everyone a while to come back to life and we could hear the butterfly's steps move away for a moment.</p><p>The steps passed in front of a number of people, some of whom were even familiar, but no one was able to make the connection with the elf haired girl teenager of the past and the young woman of today.</p><p>In fact, she did not notice it, focused as she was on reaching a particular place.</p><p>Her feet stop in front of a door. The small pink label blinding her eyes as it has always been. Her fingers rose and brushed the stamp. A soft smile broke her lips and she pulled the handle down and stepped inside. There was a lot more places occupied but she didn't really pay attention at the time. Her long legs instinctively took her to her former rack and memories rushed back as she saw herself whipping to not wear the damn combi-suit and cried tears of blood at her new missions.</p><p>She shook her head. To say it could evoke such warm feelings today. She was so grateful for all the things she learned with it, to all the experiences she was able to live because of it.</p><p>She took one last look at the room and left, closing the door. Kyoko assumed she could wait in one of the back lounges in some higher  floors and headed in that direction approaching one of the escalators on the east side of the agency hidden on the side. The president was probably busy and considering she was in no rush, she didn't want to disturb anyone. It was the other reason she had not warned anyone of the date of her return. She didn't want to burden them to come greet her when they were working. And honestly she had only known the exact date of her return just recently. She didn't even told Kanae she was coming back, even less when. She knew her friend was shooting a very important role for the moment and didn't want to distract her.</p><p> </p><p>A large office filled with useless things and gadgets of all kinds, a black knight hardly held an exclamation by ending a phone call from his international wing. Another call to the airport confirmed what he already suspected and he eagerly threw himself on his cameras, frantically hoping that what he wanted was there.</p><p>A few seconds and this time he uttered an unrestrained cheer of smirking joy and turned to Ruto in a whirl.</p><p>"Bring Maria right now!"</p><p>Ruto bow and in less than a few moments, a grumbling young teenager entering a very rebellious age was brought in, carried under the muscular arm of Ruto which let the grandfather supposed she hadn't want to come.</p><p>He giggled internally in expectation to the reaction his granddaughter would be having in a instant while the fuming girl turned to him.</p><p>She was sporting her curly hair in a high pony-tail but it was the only thing that still could be qualified of innocent. She was only 13 years old but despite the best efforts of Lory her outfits had become a little too daring to his tastes and no matter what he would do or say he couldn't manage to make her shift back to something more demure. Not that it was completely inadmissible.</p><p>But the shorts were too well, short. The top revealed her belly and she was definitively too young to wear such high-heels, he felt like Setsu outfits were coming back to bite him. Still, the ages had been completely different and it had been a role for Mogami-kun.</p><p>"Go change yourself or I won't tell you the good news", commanded Lory with a threatening glare to her.</p><p>"As if I care…" She mumbled.</p><p>He hold back a sigh.</p><p>"Petulant child, believe me, you will care and will really regret to not know" He said, his smirk turning feral.</p><p>Her granddaughter feigned indifference but he knew her and a little bit of curiosity had crept in.</p><p>"Fine…" she said already turning.</p><p>"Maria, he beginning with a new threat in his voice and she stopped her advance, I want pants on you, no heels and at least a little bit more skin covered for the top"</p><p>She grumbled.</p><p>"And quickly, please. You don't want to miss this, Lory still ended up saying, not able to refrain his impatience.</p><p>He didn't have to wait long, she was back wearing fade black ripped trousers, black sneakers and a top nearly covering everything beside a little band of skin. It was a lot better even if there was still a lot too much of black.  He supposed she had picked up on his tone considering how fast she had been.</p><p>He didn't waste any time and stooped down on his knees to whisper in her ear. Her face lightened up in a blink and with a pouf she was gone, not even letting him tell her where exactly.</p><p>Her shouts echoed and he followed after them with a grin. Things were about to get a lot more interesting. Finally.</p><p>He could go back to plotting and already pitied the boy.</p><p>…</p><p>It was a quiet day and he was enjoying it to its true value. He was heading to a new interview job but he hadn't much more today. His last role in Scotland had ended earlier than planned which allowed him to come back sooner and he was glad for the lighter schedule for once as he had felt the first symptoms of a cold coming now knowing what it was like and he knew he would appreciate the rest. He kind of got why too, he had pushed it a bit too far this time and Yashiro had scolded him harshly for it.</p><p>He was just picking something up with Yashiro then he would go to the interview. Then finally some rest. He knew he preferred to work himself as much as possible as long as he couldn't think too much but if it impacted his work, it wasn't worth it. He would have to be more careful, no matter what he felt.</p><p>Indistinct shouts were suddenly heard from afar and some people wondered what was the fuss around Ren but he tuned it out. He wanted to be alone. To not hear anything. To sleep. Because at least in his dreams, he was happy. At least in his in dreams, she was there.</p><p>He heard vaguely Yashiro asking if he knew what it was said but didn't answer until a new shout came.</p><p>And another closer.</p><p>But he still couldn't decipher what's was spoken.</p><p>Then,</p><p>A bullet of curled hair and fury passed by them startling people around and climbed three by three the escalator of the hall. It stopped a second at the top of it and Ren recognized Maria looking madly from left to right.</p><p>She called someone but it echoed like something foreign and far away and didn't register in his mind until she resumed her run and ran away and finally Ren heard what she had been shouting for a while ago when she paused again and called once more. And as it rang in his mind endlessly as clear as crystal, his limbs froze but his heart began to race for the first time in years, trying to break free of rib cage.</p><p>Maria's calls came once more.</p><p>"Onee-sama…ONEEEE-SAMAAA…"</p><p>It wasn't possible. It couldn’t be. There was no such a chance.</p><p>He knew that. He knew.</p><p>But only one person was honoured with the privilege to be called onee-sama by Maria.</p><p>Only one.</p><p>Only one.</p><p>ONLY ONE.</p><p>Kijima and Kaï came to greet him but he didn't even spare them a glance.</p><p>Maria called again and his slender legs moved on their own. He was gone and racing before he even acknowledged the movement and the rush of feelings and adrenaline pulsing through him. No matter if it wasn't true. No matter if it was all an illusion. No matter if it's was impossible. He had to go.</p><p>From afar he vaguely heard Kijima laughing and talking to Kaï but he didn't care.</p><p>"God…Kaï, let's be prepare to meet a new version of Tsuruga Ren…The poor puppy one"</p><p>"What do you mean?" an amused voice came in.</p><p>"You'll see" finished Yashiro when Kijima didn't answer.</p><p>The rest of the conversation was lost on him as he followed the calls of Maria through corridors and stairs.</p><p>And suddenly, a loud gasp, screams of glee and more shouts.</p><p>His ribcage threatened to break to those sounds and Ren accelerated again.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I love to tease. Reviews are food. Feed me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0035"><h2>35. Return-part 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kyoko had barely reached the living room when a shout at the other end of the hall rang. A screeching scream followed and startled Kyoko put down the cat's crate when she heard the whining of Snow then she swung on her feet to look to the way of the sounds. She had barely the time to blink that something or rather a little someone crashed into her sending Kyoko to the ground with her.</p><p>"Onee-sama!!!" a voice came out from the bundle of curls squashing her in a tight hug.</p><p>After the few seconds of hesitation Kyoko took to recognize the person crushing her, she chuckled and gaze with softness at the form in her arms.</p><p>"Hi Maria-chan" greeted Kyoko as she observed the girl. Or maybe should say the young teenager now. At the age of 13 years old, she was no longer a little girl. And Kyoko could see it. Forms had slowly started to appear and her clothing style had changed a bit. Although it always seemed of the same brand, there was more black and less lace and ribbons. Her hair had also grew a lot and Maria seemed to be keeping them in a ponytail.</p><p>Kyoko softly pet her hair and tried to get the attention of Maria.</p><p>"I'm glad to see you again but could you let me go" she said with a little chuckle when Maria shook her head against her belly.</p><p>She gave up. She didn't mind it that much and she had missed Maria too. She embraced her in her arms and waited the girl settled down. Her cries eventually subdued and she pushed back from Kyoko an inch.</p><p>The girl blinked away her tears and with each blink her eyes grew in confusion and shock. She stared at her face and lower and lower. She stood abruptly and pulled Kyoko on her knees rather than on her butt. Then she looked her up and down again.</p><p>She tilted her head and bite her lips, scrunching her brows in deep concentration.</p><p>"Onee-sama?" she asked like a question.</p><p>"Yes?" said Kyoko, puzzled.</p><p>"Is that really you?" the girl questioned.</p><p>"Hmm..yes?" she answered.</p><p>The girl observed her meticulously again and Kyoko brushed her hair away of her face, a bit awkward.</p><p>"You're so tall!"</p><p>Maria run the tips of her fingers in the ends of her hair, dazzled.</p><p>"Your hairs are unbelievably long! They even reach the low of your back!" The girl exclaimed, circling around Kyoko, completely excited.</p><p>Kyoko still kneeling, caught the girl by the shoulders to prevent her from moving around so much. A thing that didn't change from the past.</p><p>She smiled at Maria.</p><p>"Is it upsetting?" she asked to Maria.</p><p>Startled, the girl looked at Kyoko in utter shock.</p><p>"Of course not. You're beautiful" She vehemently said.</p><p>"Thank you Maria" she said humbly, feeling grateful for the compliment but not sure she herself felt that way.</p><p>"And to answer your question, I just grew up" In front of the frowning girl Kyoko corrected. "Okay, I grew a lot, I would agree. But I couldn't stay a little girl all my life now, could I?" Kyoko proposed with a grin.</p><p>Maria chuckled and nodded.</p><p>"But it's still amazing that you grew so much. Japanese people don’t' usually" Maria said, muzzling over this fact in wonder.</p><p>"I know, Kyoko said and taking a conspirator tone she whispered: "Sometimes I still wonder what Americans put in their food because I grew"</p><p>Maria giggled and Kyoko stood back pulling the girl up with her.</p><p>Not far away, looking at them with adoration and a touch of surprise, Lory chuckled.</p><p><em>My my my…What have we there? </em>He thought, a smirk forming and his eyes turned glossy with delight in the expectation of the future to come. Things were going to be so interesting for now on. How did she even changed so much, he wondered. He was used to the unexpected from her and would dare to say from actors in general. But this.</p><p>This was something else altogether.</p><p>Some would say it was a change. Some would say it was merely adulthood. Others would claim it was a fake.</p><p>More than a shifted, more than a grow. A wonderful grows into an even majestic butterfly.</p><p>But before anything else, it was an affirmation. The most incredible and beautiful yet simple of affirmation.</p><p>She knew who she was.</p><p>This young woman now knew who she was. What she liked, what was her strengths, her desires, her dreams. She knew herself. What she stood for and not. And that made more her more confident and relaxed than anything else could have done.</p><p>He could still see the scars of her hard childhood and past. He could the marks it had kept on her. But it could also see how strong it had made her.</p><p>In the simple manners she looked tenderly at Maria and indulged her. In the brief tension that passed over her when Maria complimented her appearance and her way of brushing it away herself didn't believe it. Even, like it was painful to hear compliments.</p><p>It was indeed their Mogami-kun.</p><p>Her past had made her that way. Her past had rendered impossible for her to imagine to be able to find herself beautiful and if Lory was to dare a wild guess, he would even say that it had made her impossible to think herself lovable.</p><p>When he looked at her right now though, it wasn't weakness he saw. This past had did this, had forged her that way but it was also what made her so unique. Why even after such a transformation, such a humble view could still be found in her at all time. And why a grace far more precious than any appearance was present in her.</p><p>Because, and it was one of the saddest part of life for Lory, the most loving and caring people had often to suffer to become who they are. Such a person without the burden of pain as an experience of life could not comprehend the true value of a caring heart, could never understand the pain of another as good as one who already suffered. It was the shackles of the compassionates ones, to feel and understand because of your own scars.</p><p>Lory knew a few people without this painful pre-requirement might exist but he had yet to meet them. Each and every single time he found a caring soul, this person had suffered more it should ever be permit. It had been true for Kyoko. It had been true for Kuon. Hell, even Kuu had his lot.</p><p>But even through the thorns of everything, these people were fighters. Natural fighters of the life. What was standing against was the absolute proof of that.</p><p>Because, yes she had suffered, yes some scars would always make it difficult for her to see her won beauty but right now she had transformed those weaknesses in forces. He could see that Mogami-kun was stronger than ever. More importantly she owned those scars. She wasn't completely as unconscious of them as before.</p><p>Just a few meters away but he could still see it.</p><p>Even just a little. Just a little bit. But she had acquired the awareness. The vague acquaintance of her distorted esteem of herself. She couldn't change it Lory supposed. It was due to some deep rooted scars he didn't even know, something engraved as a child wasn't something you could change easily. But she didn't admit defeat in the time spent away. Lory had heard from the international branch a part of what she did, keeping his distances most of the times unless she ask for anything but hoping for the best and keeping an eye on her from afar. And he had been right. Because, she had made the most courageous choice possible.</p><p>Rather than trying to change what couldn't be, which was highly impossible without…well he knew what- she had decided to own it instead.</p><p>Sometimes, Lory was really glad he was so perceptive of things. He could have missed it. Without his experience and acute eye…It's not like she would have ever tell him. She maybe wasn't even completely conscious of all the changes. So he was really glad he could be the secret witness of what he really had in front of the eyes. Others would understand over time.</p><p>He couldn't have been prouder.</p><p> </p><p>And if the transformation was as phenomenal in her acting than in her mental. His chest swelled with impatience and thrills.</p><p> </p><p>He saw an enraged black-haired young woman rushing furiously past him to go straight to Mogami-kun and his granddaughter when a thought struck him suddenly and he bent over silently, trying to overcome his shakes. Tears broke at the corners of his eyes while infinite scenes begun to form in his mind.</p><p>
  <em>The poor poor boy…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>He doesn't stand a chance…</em>
</p><p>And for the first time Lory thought he pitied him a bit.</p><p>And it was at that moment feet surged from the opposite hall turning the corner to reach the little opened waiting room. Lory was glad it was not a closed space and merely an all open place where were put some couches but from where you could see the others floors down from the handrail. It would make such a mesmerizing scene for a drama. He smiled and let his back rest on the wall staying concealed in the background to enjoy to its fullest what was about to unfold.</p><p>His hand moved without him really noticing and grabbed his phone making a call to someone who will be very interested having actors.</p><p>"Hi kurosaki, greeted Lory, neh you're still looking for an actor for your new movie?"</p><p>"Yes. Why? Do you have someone in mind?" echoed in the phone.</p><p>"Take Ren"</p><p>"…"</p><p>"Come on"</p><p>"Did he ask you to do that?"</p><p>Lory snorted.</p><p>"He would never do that"</p><p>There was a big sigh at the other side of the line.</p><p>"Lory, he's clouding around. I don't know what happened but the man is barely a shadow when he's not acting. It's a cheerful role. Or at least, an energetic one. He can't pull it off in his state"</p><p>"And if I say his gloominess might be replaced by unsettlement, maybe even excitement in like less than a few minutes. Definitely not clouding around at least, then?" Asked Lory.</p><p>"I might consider it"</p><p>"Good. And you will have finished fighting over your other problem and resolute yourself to accept it doesn't work, call me back"</p><p>He cut the conversation.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0036"><h2>36. You</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>You</em>
</p><p>Kyoko was being assaulted by Kanae with questions. She was talking with Maria when suddenly an angry beautiful woman had appeared in front of her. Once she had grabbed Kyoko and hardly hugged her with awkwardness for a few seconds, to Kyoko delight and happiness, she had relaxed as quickly bombarding her with angry questions. Kyoko missed the contact and was so happy so see Kanae but a bit of unease was still there. Even with the calls, kyoko had never told her all the reasons for leaving. Plus, with the hindsight of the years passed she could now see she had rarely asked before attacking Kanae with hugs. She had too pushy and far too often.  With what she had now lived, she felt it was inacceptable to do that if her friend wasn't comfortable with it.</p><p>Well, okay, even if she didn't feel that way and that it hadn't been so long since she had seen Kanae she wouldn't have been able to act that way exactly. She would never refuse to hug her and would have under other circumstances but she couldn't imagine herself running in halls shouting Moko-san everywhere. Kyoko chuckled inwardly. No wonder, Kanae had felt uncomfortable. She crooked a smile still. She would have still crushed her in a hug if it had been possible.</p><p>"I missed you Kanae. I'm so glad to see you again" She said with a loving smile to her friend.</p><p>Said friend blushed and grumbled.</p><p>"You won't escape the explanations like that, I warn you! What sort of thing-…And what happened ? Look at you! If you think you won't have to tell me anything, you can go back in a plane! Moh!" Said a friend in a huff and Kyoko felt the desire to call her Moko-san came back for a bit.</p><p>She grinned at her.</p><p>"I will talk, I will talk" she conceded and she could hear Maria giggling under the bickering.</p><p>"How is Hiou-kun?" Kyoko asked, teasing her a bit and hoping it would divert the subject when Kanae started to ask about relationships and such.</p><p>"Oh, you, don't you dare!" exclaimed Kanae with a fierce blush and an outraged glare in her eyes. Kanae had told her a bit about Hiou-kun and apparently it was-… complicated. So, now, Kyoko was teasing her by phone when they were calling each other.</p><p>Kyoko coughed in front of the hilarious face of Kanae.</p><p>"Hai hai" she said to appease her.</p><p>"He did weird things again" whispered Maria to her in a conspiring tone.</p><p>"Which sort of things?" questioned Kyoko as she bent to hear Maria better.</p><p>"He's completely confusing her, continued Maria, one week he offers her presents, the next one he's playing cold and parading with other girls and now he's doing flirty jokes and getting a very slightly touchy with her" Explained Maria as she shook her head.</p><p>"He's getting desperate and did absolutely everything he could but in the wrong order, Kanae-san never stopped grumbling these days" Maria finished with kind of pity in the eyes.</p><p>Kyoko's sides shook with repressed laughs. She knew from Kanae herself her friend wasn't indifferent but the poor boy was in front of a woman who didn't get moved easily and it was most probably wearing off on him. Apparently it was since a scene two years ago that he had started acting weirdly out and freaking out her friend sometimes because she didn't understand him anymore.</p><p>"I'll talk to him, Kanae" Kyoko suddenly declared after turning to her.</p><p>Relief passed briefly in her eyes until her gaze hardened again.</p><p>"Don't think it will dispense you from our talk" she threatened.</p><p>"Of course" Kyoko said and pinched her lips, touched that Kanae had missed her that much but controlling the desire to hug her again.</p><p>She sighed but then her cat miaowled.</p><p>"Oh boy" grumbled Kanae.</p><p>She shifted her eyes to look at Snow and heard her friend but her gaze landed on the way on the most unexpected unsettling thing and completely unprepared she gaped as her body started to shook. The violence of her feelings threatened to engulf her as every little memories, every sensations, every feels came back rushing like it was as fresh as dew.</p><p>"He's going to-…began Kanae.</p><p>"…And he lost it" finished Maria for her.</p><p>Someone was coming.</p><p>Kyoko's lips murmured his name before she noticed she was even talking.</p><p>"Ren…"</p><p>He hadn't change.</p><p>Still as handsome.</p><p>Still as intense.</p><p>The sound of his walk seemed to be howling in her ears to each step he took to her. He was running. Why was he running? His hairs were a complete mess, unusual for his habits. But she hadn't seen him in years so, he surely had changed. In one way or another.</p><p>On her peripheral view she could see people watching, wondering.</p><p>He looks taller than before. She snorted internally. She just hadn't seen him in so long her head was pulling pranks on her.</p><p>He was only a few steps away now.</p><p>He was so fast. His long strides seemed to make him fly. She grinned. Only one person could make her feel like they were flying.</p><p>Did he loose weight, his face looked more angular than before.</p><p> She couldn't move. She felt trapped. By her feelings rushing like they had replaced the blood running in her veins by emotions.</p><p>She felt stuck. Captured.</p><p>By the expressions on his face. Not that she would run, she wanted nothing more than to see him now that she was actually seeing him, but she wasn't used to see such intensity on him.</p><p> There was something in his face. Was it despair? Sadness?</p><p>Nonsense.</p><p>Need?</p><p>Of what? It was ridiculous.</p><p>Joy?</p><p>Maybe…</p><p>It looked like…</p><p>He had lost reason.</p><p>…And found it back.</p><p>Air was expulsed from her lungs and elongated arms circled her as a warm strong body enrolled itself around her with such a force she thought absent-mildly he might break a bone but didn't really care at the moment.</p><p>
  <em>Ahhhh…This scent…</em>
</p><p>Musc, santal and aqua…</p><p>
  <em>Ren's special scent…</em>
</p><p>Such a nostalgia. It was all coming back.</p><p>The warm that erupted from this firmness. The gentleness contained in this strength. How many times did Kyoko wished to be in this embrace. To feel and be in the safety of those very arms. To hear him whispered and hold when she was cold, when she was lonely. Her tears crept up and she hide them in his neck. Though it seemed like an eternity for her it didn't even take her a second to answer his hug.</p><p>Some days had been so cold. Some had haunted her so much.</p><p>The lack of his smile,</p><p> his voice,</p><p> his teasing,</p><p> of his existence in her life crushing her from the inside at time.</p><p>She grabbed at the cloth on his back. This was the most precious feeling for her. It was him.</p><p>Him.</p><p>She had promised to keep her distance. She had promised to reign on her feelings.</p><p>
  <em>Not now…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I want to feel him…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>I missed him so much…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Just once…</em>
</p><p>She crushed him back and a trembling tiny chuckle escaped her when he folded her against his body even more. If she didn't know better she could have think he was trying to merge her body with his. It was so hard to not believe in what wishing for when he was holding her like this.</p><p>She didn't care anyway. Not right now. It was a stolen moment but it was hers.</p><p>
  <em>Just this once…!</em>
</p><p>Her feet left the ground and she felt him shaking a bit. She wondered what was wrong. She could have swear she felt something humid in her neck before calling herself delusional for even thinking it was possible.</p><p>She sighed internally. It was time to let go. She knew it. She had already abused her time in the situation.</p><p>She took a big breath, a light pain tugging inside for a second when she finally found the resolve to let go.</p><p>She loosened up her hold on his back at last and kissed his cheek lightly according herself this last thing as she murmured to him.</p><p>"Hi Ren"</p><p>He didn't utter a word in answer. Just hold her tighter.</p><p>Until after another long moment he released her and let her down.</p><p>She looked at him for a while. She had longed to see this face so much. To look into those eyes.</p><p>She couldn't get enough and took advantage of the fact he seemed to still be lost in thoughts to observe him as much she so wished for.</p><p>Contrarily to what she first thought, against reason if she calculated the length of the muscles, the length to the waist to the head, the waist to the feet; he was indeed taller. By three centimetres. Not that much but he still looked even more of a giant than before. How? Why? She grumbled inwardly.</p><p>Upon closer look though he didn't seem in good shape, he had dark circles under his eyes and seemed indeed a bit thinner in the face. And with the messy hair… It was a bit scary and if she wasn't that happy to see him she would start to feel angry. What the hell did he do to himself while she was gone?!</p><p>She will have to scold him or yashiro for not taking care of himself once more.</p><p>Kyoko tried to smile at him lightly to clear the tension knowing she still had lost control in this but he just kept staring at her silently and with such intensity that even after all this years and so much more experience a blush begun its ascent to her face. But he suddenly blink. Several times.</p><p>And tilting his head, he spoke.</p><p>"Kyoko?" He asked, seeming puzzled.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0037"><h2>37. You-part-2-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>His legs pushed against the ground. Running. Running. Always faster.</p><p>He needed it.</p><p>The majesty of her heart…</p><p>He could hear Yashiro calling after him. Could hear him huffing as he run after him. He couldn't care less.</p><p>He couldn't think.</p><p>She was there.</p><p>Her regular scolding about his eating's habits…</p><p>Could barely breath. There were so much things rolling around in his messed up head but also barely anything.</p><p>She was back.</p><p>The power of her innocence on his dirty soul…</p><p>The ultimate shout of Maria echoed to his ears far forward and he pushed harder on his legs. He needed to be faster. He stumbled a bit and the burn in legs 'muscles grew with every step but he accelerated.</p><p>Her smile and dreamy eyes when she thought about fairies…</p><p>His mind was shut on one unique thought now.</p><p>He needed to see her.</p><p>He needed to see her. He <em>needed </em>to see her!</p><p>His blood beat in every fiver of being. Hitting. In his legs. In his arms. In his chest. Pounding so much it was numbing his members. Shakings passed through him in rhythm with his heartbeat. Anxiety and joy arguing with each other to take control inside him.</p><p>A surprised feminine laugh. A far away greeting.</p><p>He stumbled lightly. Pushed even more on his feet.</p><p>Such a familiar and yet foreign voice.</p><p>Another laugh.</p><p>
  <em>Kyoko…                </em>
</p><p>He was dying.</p><p>He accelerated.</p><p>
  <em>Kyoko…</em>
</p><p>His feet reached the end of the corridor and he heard a grumbling he had not heard in years from her friend as she talked. The deeper ring of her voice washed over him once more and in this instant, even if he couldn't understand the words said, he thanked the acoustic of the building. His all body felt pulled toward the unmistakable tone belonging to <em>her. </em>She was the magnet of his life. And for the first time in years his heart was pounding alive, alighted by the spark drawing him to her and nerves wreaking havoc with the released longing banging everywhere under his skin.</p><p>He turned the corner in an expiration and his eyes locked with shocked golden orbs. The pulse in his blood leaped and fluttered and coaled tightly in his throat. Emotion thick, choking him. His sight forgot everything else.</p><p>She was back. He felt rooted again. Alive again.</p><p>Nothing mattered anymore.</p><p>Joy. Relief. Love.</p><p>
  <em>Kyoko.</em>
</p><p>His eyes oddly stung. He blinked it away</p><p>He didn't even notice he was moving again. He was floating. Looking at the gold. In the brightness of her eyes. Focused on reaching.</p><p>
  <em>Ahhh…I missed staring in those…</em>
</p><p>Finally. Finally he was graced with the possibility to look into her eyes again.</p><p>Reaching her. At the second, it was the only purpose of his existence.</p><p>
  <em>Kyoko…</em>
</p><p>His arms rose meters away from making contact with his target.</p><p>And then he was there. Soft texture under the pads of his fingers. A gasp of expulsed air. A comforting lily-of-the-valley flowering scent that had haunted his dreams. Warm he had longed for since the moment she left. He curled as much of himself as he could on her in a gripping embrace. He was truly home.</p><p>Her arms tucked at his back and he tightened his hold, his own ones mingling and shuffling locks of hair, tangling unconsciously his hands in them.</p><p>
  <em>Kyoko!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>You are there!</em>
</p><p>Not mindful of anything but the feeling of her. He stayed like that for a long while, barely conscious. Lost in her.</p><p>He was beginning to come back to his senses and preparing himself to the idea of letting go when his woke up senses got conscious of something. Several things in fact.</p><p>The weight of her in his arms, heavier. Smooth fluffy strands matted around his arms and hands resting at her waist and back. Odd. Firmness and softness against his chest. Under his hands. Changed.</p><p>Different.</p><p>And then a shift. From her. A soft touch on his right cheek. A warm whisper.</p><p>"Hi Ren"</p><p>His awareness skyrocketed and puzzled he pulled her down to look at her.</p><p>What greeted his sight rattled him so much he wasn't so sure of what his eyes was seeing anymore. Long straight hair gracing a familiar yet different face, a few shorter strands curling around her cheeks. A bit less round, her face was slightly thinner, the round shapes of teenage ages lost. Her eyes shining with more life than a star.</p><p>
  <em>So… bright…</em>
</p><p>One of his hands shook.</p><p>As he observed her, he realised with a shock he didn't have to bend as much as before and that to his amazement she was reaching the top of his chin.</p><p>He felt a bit lost. He couldn't comprehend what he was looking at.</p><p>He tilted his head.</p><p>"Kyoko?"                     </p><p>"Yes?" She answered softly but a bit confused.</p><p>He gulped as he heard her slightly different voice from closer. The phone hadn't been representative at all.</p><p>It was bad.</p><p>He took a trembling step back, needing the retrospect to understand.</p><p>Big mistake.</p><p>He gaped. Of course he did. What else could he do when his eyes finally saw. He had the violent desire to slap his face to wake himself. Was it really Kyoko?</p><p> What the hell was that? He could see it was her. It was her eyes. Her spark. Her scent. Of course it was her.</p><p>He should have been more wary. Be prepared to such a thing. Of course she would have changed over years. It was normal she wasn't the same as five years ago.</p><p>He stared at her completely bewildered. Unsettled beyond words. Wearing faded blues jeans and a soft off-shoulders pull, she was the epitome of simple grace.</p><p> </p><p>He looked at her plain snickers, no heels.</p><p>From Kyoko's side, she idly wondered why he was looking at her feet with accusatory murderous eyes.</p><p>How did she grow so much? She was what? 5'9? No. 5'10. Was she not Japanese? She had changed, in a lot too much of ways. He groaned internally and stared at her legs, his already soft spot in the past, going on for miles.</p><p>Feeling himself getting flustered, he closed his lids. Despite the years, the distance. The power this woman had on him.</p><p>He took another step back and snickers could be heard in the background.</p><p>It was really bad. In so many ways.</p><p>He already had no immunity in the past. But now…</p><p>She had always been the most adorable innocent girl to him. His cutest squirrel. The most beautiful girl to him.</p><p>She was so much more than that now. She was no more a girl. She was a beautiful young woman.</p><p>He wouldn't have mind either way, she would always have been the most beautiful to him. But this,</p><p>this was more dangerous.</p><p>His eyes raked her figure for a second and defeated longing eyes shined as a new tension took hold of him and another type of fire grabbed his guts with the raging flams of desire. He choked on his own saliva and coughed.</p><p>He saw Kyoko blinking with confusion at him when he crossed her interrogative gaze with his feverish eyes.</p><p>
  <em>"You look like an angel…</em>
</p><p>Which was appropriate since he knew she had the heart that went with it.</p><p>Containing a moan of despair in front of this new form of torture, he gripped his arms to himself.</p><p>"I need to sit down" he got out and plopped himself on a couch on the side resisting harshly the want to put his head in his hands.</p><p>Soft fingers brushed lock away when a hand touched his forehead and Ren felt like this sweet agony was going to end up regular.</p><p>"You okay?" Kyoko interrogated bent to him, "looking at your face, you seemed to even less be caring for yourself she grumbled, "but at least you don't have a fever"</p><p>He looked back at her and locks of hair tickled his face.</p><p>
  <em>I'm so cursed</em>
</p><p>"Sorry" Kyoko apologized and pushed back her hair on her head.</p><p>He shook his head. It wasn't bothering him. Not in the way she was surely imagining.</p><p>"Don't worry. They are very soft, it just tickled" he said without thinking.</p><p>She smiled. New. No plethora of apologies.</p><p>Gazing into her eyes, he smiled in return.</p><p>"It's been a while" he brought out looking at her relentlessly.</p><p>She nodded and slowly brushed strands away again, seeming embarrassed this time. His eyes followed the movement of her hand in her hair, captivated. Wishing it was his hand. It looked like it had become an habit of her. Cute. Sensual.</p><p>Dangerous.</p><p>He groaned aloud and lost the battle of not putting his head in his hands.</p><p>A barking laugher erupted while Kyoko asked again if he was alright but it's the owner of the voice that had laughed answered for him.</p><p>"He will be okay" the president started as he finally approached them with a grinning Kanae and a thoughtful Maria, "with time" he finished with another snort. He recorded everything, he was so pleased right now. He turned to Kyoko with a wild grin.</p><p>Kyoko bowed and with a warm smile greeted him.</p><p>"Hi shachou"</p><p>The president pouted.</p><p>"Am I the only one that doesn't get to have a hug, Mogami-kun? I know I'm technically your boss but I kind of missed you too, you know He grumbled, pretending to be hurt.</p><p>Kyoko arched a brow in question but when he pouted harder Kyoko sighed.</p><p>"Seriously?"</p><p>He nodded and lifted his arms. Kyoko snorted but took two steps forwards and gave him a brief hug.</p><p>"Hi boss" she said again.</p><p>Ren watched the scene like it was a scene took from a drawing of a surrealist artist. He couldn't stop looking at Kyoko. She would never had hug someone so casually before. Right now, she looked so different. It was like he was rediscovering her and he wanted nothing more than unveil everything that had changed in her.</p><p>"There is a striking difference of passion between my hug and the one with Ren, I think I'm vexed" the president declared with severity but smiling eyes.</p><p>Ren blushed and Kyoko contained her own with difficulty. It was going to be a test for her. To succeed in not reacting with this sort of thing even when the president was talking nonsense on purpose.</p><p>Ren was planning some counter to the president when Yashiro finally joined them, huffing heavily and seeming quite annoyed.</p><p>"Ren what sprouted into to you to leave like that, I run after you like crazy and you didn't even answer! What-Yashiro stopped all of sudden when he noticed Kyoko.</p><p>"Who is this?" he asked.</p><p>Kyoko opened the mouth to clear it up though slightly vexed he didn’t' recognize her, while everyone chuckled.</p><p>"Hi Yashiro-san" Kyoko eventually said.</p><p>The manager jumped in the air.</p><p>"Kyoko-chan?!!" He exclaimed and turned to Ren that turned his head to the side. Then to the president who smirked wickedly.</p><p>"Is that really you?" he asked again.</p><p>Kyoko nodded.</p><p>"You changed so much! You look stunning Kyoko-chan and you're so tall. Were you trying to reach Ren's size? What happened?" His mouth fuzzed with questions too fast for Kyoko to answer.</p><p>"I know I got taller Yashiro-san but I don't think I changed that much beside that. And to answer your question, I'm not certain but I think it was just some sort of grown spurt" Finally told Kyoko.</p><p>"And some amazing one with that" Kanae completed.</p><p>To which Maria, Yashiro and the president all agreed and Kyoko shook her head in amusement.</p><p>"You're exaggerating all too much" she protested.</p><p>Kanae purposely arched a brow at Ren and he arched one back at her. They did that a few times until Ren sighed, resigned.</p><p>"You look amazing Kyoko, they are right" He added in her direction.</p><p>Kyoko blushed a little before putting her hand on her hip.</p><p>"Don't encourage them"</p><p>His shoulders slumped.</p><p>It was indeed her.</p><p>
  <em>I really am in trouble…</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you will adore this one. The reunion part is so dear to my heart. Enjoy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0038"><h2>38. Let's open the curtains</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ren ended the call, frustrated. Once again he had come across his mailbox. It had already been two weeks since she came back, but it was almost like when she was still abroad. She had been busy with an art shoot mixing fashion and art first then other things. He wanted to talk to her, to see her, but he didn't quite know how to behave. Ren wanted nothing more than to allow her to see what had become of her. But it looked like she didn't want him on her side. At least, that was the impression he had after the past two weeks of trying to see her without success. If he wasn't persuaded she had no reason he would think she was avoiding him again. But now, she was back. He had agreed to keep his distances while she was away but it was over. So he had no reason to not to call her, talk to her or see her.</p><p>And whatever the reason, this time, he wouldn't accept it. He wouldn't.</p><p>He was determined to get closer to her. He couldn't take it anymore. He needed her in his life. Whatever the way but she had to be present. He wouldn't let her keep her distance if that was what she was doing and if he had to alleviate his schedule to be able to see her, he would. So be it.</p><p>Today, things will change. Today, he knew where she was. Thanks to the president.</p><p>Grabbing his keys he left his flat with a breath inside of him. He was going to her. He still didn't know how he would act. How to behave after all these years. After how much she changed. He was more nervous than in the past. It didn’t matter. He was going to her.</p><p>He was driving his car and closing on the centre of Tokyo when stuck in traffic jam his eyes noticed the giant screen on one of the surrounding buildings and could not detach themselves from it. Semi-transparent drapes twirled in a rainbow of colors on a black background and five silhouettes hidden in white capes appeared. A catchy music with drumming guitar and a subdued voice began and Ren lowered his window to hear it better. Footsteps echoed across the screen and a tall masked figure elegantly advanced. Wearing a hat and a black cape like a magician concealing her face and appearance, she swirled on her bare feet to the rhythm of the accelerating music and the cape curled at her feet revealing a high fashion outfit of the final season of international F-Rmandy for women.</p><p>A black blouse tunic tied on a shoulder descending lower on one side made of a wispy fabric and perfectly cut white slacks flaring at the ankles covered her and she took the pose for a second. She tapped his heel on the floor and Ren thought he saw the shape of a tattoo on the inside of the ankle.</p><p>Other models made their appearance</p><p>Other models made their appearance and promoted different outfits. Still masked by her hat, the central figure bent and hidden in shadows she threw her hat in the air, her teasing smile slightly lightened at the end. The image changed. Same people but only dressed in sheets the colour of the outfits they wore previously. Only the central person, tall compared to the others, had still kept her hat, the only model with the face never seen clearly from the start.</p><p>Paint was thrown into the screen on each of the models colouring their sheets and their laughing faces with coloured splashes. They disappeared again and the light returned, slowly lighting up dozens of tables where the models were frozen inside the frames. They were dressed in other pieces of new collection but all represented a character and a different story depicted in each painting.</p><p>One was wearing a funny hat.</p><p>The feminine figure detached herself from the frame and brushed the splashed coloured ground with her bare feet. She was very graceful and seemed to be floating and Ren surprised himself by admiring her sensual figure. The others followed after her and got out  of the paintings to disappear into black and reappear again.</p><p>All once again sported a new garment and this time everyone had a hat.</p><p>Captivated, Ren saw them step by step, some retreating blindly and others advancing until they formed a circle in simple and light movements.</p><p>The silhouette at the front clothed in a turquoise dress curled up at the legs and with several cuts letting skin be shown while it tightened at the neck was the one of the beginning and when each of the models took a different pose with their different hats as the light illuminated them and left for the next; she turned to face the screen and put her own black hat on her face when the light came and lowered it just enough for everyone to see her eyes and winked.</p><p>Ren puffed air out in a gasp as he gazed into golden and realized instantly who it was. The music ended, the screen faded the models away into black and inscriptions appeared to give the dates of the expositions and where and when to find the new collection.</p><p>Horns brought him back to reality as he had been staring at his steering wheel for several minutes. Transfixed. He didn't have the words to express how he felt beside the hammering of his heart, the tension in his members, the weird sensation he had to hasten and the certitude of danger.</p><p>He brought back his car to live and soon parked in the parking lot of LME.</p><p>When he reached the large room now devoted to this section of the agency in particular, Matsushima-san was in the process of introducing Kyoko to a flock of grumpy shiny pink jumpsuits in which people were.</p><p>Under the embarrassed gaze of Kyoko, Matsushima explained to them that she was originally the first member of this section, the person for whom this branch had been created before she left it 5 years earlier when the president had judged good that she graduated from it.</p><p>Ren observed the scene, amused. He sometimes forgot how much the love me section had progressed those last years. There were like twenty people in it now. Even if the three original ones weren't part of it anymore. There were young men in it too now. But not only teenagers or young adults but also kids barely entering teenage age.</p><p>Unsurprisingly from this section, most looked at Kyoko with hostility except some where Ren could see a hint of curiosity in their eyes.</p><p> He looked back at Kyoko, delighted to finally see her after the brief meeting they had had. She was wearing a thick white turtleneck sweater that didn't seem to be enough given the chills he saw and pants that enhanced her long legs. It shaped her like a second skin and highlighted toned well-trained muscles.</p><p>Ren turned the face away, blushing as he realized what he was doing.</p><p>He still had a hard time getting used to the new look she had gotten. He liked it. Tremendously even but it disturbed him more than he wanted to admit. It was as if all the rules he thought he knew about her had changed.</p><p>She was no more a teenager. She didn't look the same. She didn't act the same. What were the codes of this new Kyoko? He didn't know.</p><p>He craved to discover it though.</p><p>And then, it was highly distracting. He had tried to remain as impassive as before but because it was Kyoko who had this appearance, he could not help but to drift.</p><p>Matsushima explained to them that they would be under the survival of Kyoko from time to time history that they benefit from the experience of Kyoko as a member of the Love me section and his time spent abroad as actress and model.</p><p>He saw Kyoko breathing air out in a sigh and wondered why she felt so uncomfortable. She was the perfect person for this task.</p><p>Matsushima left her and nodded at Ren who had hidden to not be noticed while she was greeting the others.</p><p>…</p><p>Kyoko sighed and introduced herself. She had tried to avoid this but had not found any real argument against it. And the president insisted. He had instructed her to talk to the new recruits in the Love Me section about what she had experienced and even if she wanted to do certain activities together or give them missions. She was impatient to get to know them but did not feel comfortable because she thought she was extremely ill-placed to be one of those who gave advice.</p><p>She smiled at them and told them she would try to arrange a schedule for their first session that would arrange everyone and that she would find a way to make time in her own schedule as well.</p><p>These last two weeks had been hectic. She had participated in the shooting featuring certain artists in collaboration with the brand F-Rmandy and had spent the rest of her time settling in her new apartment with Snow. Ah, and to avoid as much as possible the chances of meeting him.</p><p>Seeing him again had shaken her far more than she had imagined and brought back her feelings at the front of her mind with a strength she couldn't fathom to ever be possible. She wanted nothing more to spend time with him but she had made a promise to herself and furthermore she needed to be sure to always reign on her feelings so that it wouldn't be any risk of leak to the surface.</p><p>And he did not help at all with all his proposals to see each other when she would have time and his many calls.</p><p>But her resistance was weakening.</p><p>Yes, she was starting to think of valid excuses to see him. Even if it was only in passing. And she didn't know how many times she would still be able to find excuses to not take his calls.</p><p>She was about to tell the twenty people in pink jumpsuits, failing in knowing their names at the moment, that they could go when a low voice rose from the side of the entrance and she turned pale.</p><p>"So like that, you have time to arrange your schedules to speak with the Love me section but not for me?" called Ren from his place with a sparkling smile.</p><p>She turned to him with a tight grimace.</p><p>The people sitting at the sill windows or gathered by little groups in corner whispered a bit but mostly ignored him when he said hello to them.</p><p>He shifted back his attention on Kyoko.</p><p>"Hi" he greeted her, actually not able to stay angry when he was finally able to see her from closer.</p><p>"Hi" she greeted back faking nonchalance and wondering what he wanted and why he was not working. "What are you doing here?" Kyoko asked.</p><p>"Coming to see you" He answered in all sincerity," Since you were too busy to talk with me" he finished.</p><p>Kyoko pinched her lips, wondering if he had guessed she was avoiding him or if he was talking innocently but feeling guilty all the same.</p><p>The Love Me recruits started to go out but before Kyoko could take advantage of it to go away, Ren led her into another subject.</p><p>"I saw the advertisement for the collaboration, he begun.</p><p>"Oh made Kyoko not really knowing how to react. It was so awkward.</p><p>"It's really well choreographed, I could see the artistic touch in it. It was really a beautiful ad to watch" complimented Ren and Kyoko thanked him numbly. She was searching for an escape route and trying to keep her distance but again he wouldn't make it easy for her.</p><p>"I won't let you escape me this time", he warned her having apparently guessed her thoughts.</p><p>She opened her mouth to retort but he cut her.</p><p>"Don't pretend you have something to do right now, I know it's not true" he affirmed and Kyoko closed her mouth. Yashiro might have had a look on her schedule since she was back and had absolutely refuse a manager for now, knowing the boss plans.</p><p>"You don't have work?" She questioned, quitting the fight and accepting defeat for this once.</p><p>He shook his head.</p><p>"Can we grab a coffee and have lunch together?" Ren immediately asked, feeling she wasn't trying to flee anymore.</p><p>She nodded and smiled weakly vanquished. He grinned wildly.</p><p>"Great" Ren said, barely containing cheers. "If you're okay with it I would like to catch up" he proposed and she agreed, knowing she would regret it but not having the force to refuse once more.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So I hope you will like this once because I put special care into it. That artist ad collad had been in my head for years so I'm really happy to finally make it so it would meet the light of day and not stay in the darkness of my mind. I was writing this and imagining this with catchy pumped up songs so I was really fired up on this scene.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0039"><h2>39. You and me ~act 1~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They headed for the cafeteria of LA heart and had almost reached it when their path crossed Kjima who came from the opposite direction. Kijima came towards Ren with a big smile and greeted him warmly. Kyoko knew instantly that they had gotten closer in recent years.</p><p>But soon Kjima took note of Kyoko and whistled loudly scooping a glare from Ren.</p><p>"You're in lovely company, dude" Kijima uttered.</p><p>"Who are you beauty?" He said as he turned to Kyoko and she could feel the irritation emitted from Ren beside them. Then he saw Ren's look.</p><p>"Wow, buddy, calm down. Who force you to eat this morning? And what? " " So that I know to never propose you that" He added with a grimacing smile. "The last time I saw you with that sort of face it concerned K-</p><p>"You really didn't change" Kyoko cut him, hoping to distract Ren of whatever was his reason to be upset. That was another thing that was the same.</p><p>
  <em>Still as moody…</em>
</p><p>"Wait…</p><p>His eyes bulged out their sockets and he gaped literally open mouthed.</p><p>"Kyoko-chan? Is that really you?" he demanded, soon getting excited.</p><p>"No way! No way no way…It's magical at this level…"and he exploded in laughs. Between tears he gave a pitiful look to Ren and begun to back away.</p><p>"I-I need to go…I can't…It was nice seeing you again, Kyoko-chan…I really can't…He was so bent over in shakings he looked like he needed to pee and mostly run afar in laughs as soon as he was out of sight.</p><p>Kyoko arched a brow at Ren but he just shook his head with some grumbles.</p><p>"You look closer than before" Kyoko transmitted simply.</p><p>Ren nodded with a slightly troubled face.</p><p>"I couldn't get rid of him and though he can be quite annoying, he has his good points too" Ren explained as they finally sat on one of the corners booths.</p><p>Amused, Kyoko couldn't help but chuckled. He could say whatever he wanted, she was not blind. There was affection in his eyes when he talked about him. And Kyoko could also see that he seemed more relaxed than in the past. His eyes also seemed less haunted than before.</p><p>"And you?" asked Ren, "I heard your friend over the phone three months ago, Kayla if I remember well, how is she?"</p><p>A frown crossed Kyoko's face and she shook her head with a short grin.</p><p>"Overwhelming, not caring in any boundaries, kind, nosy…A mind on everything" Kyoko cited and Ren snorted.</p><p>"She seemed interesting"</p><p>"She is" said Kyoko with warm in the voice.</p><p>"Well, most of the time" and this time, she crooked a smile.</p><p>Pinching his lips, Ren held back another smile.</p><p>"You changed a lot" he said and Kyoko looked back at him.</p><p>"I know I'm taller than before and have long hair but other than that I- she started.</p><p>He shook his head.</p><p>"That's not what I meant" he corrected, "You are much more posed than before. More comfortable and confident, it's mesmerizing to see and it looks good on you" Ren pointed out and Kyoko blushed. Moved by his words that didn't touch on her appearance but on her acts for once.</p><p>"Thank you" she muttered.</p><p>"You look good too beside <em>your health</em> "she said purposely insisting on the end of the sentence.</p><p>"I'm perfectly fine, thank you" Ren protested.</p><p>"Your face is thinner than in the past and you have dark circles under your eyes. Did you even eat this morning?" She demanded with an impassive face.</p><p>She saw him open his mouth then close it several times before putting his hand on it without uttering anything in the end.</p><p>Kyoko was tempted to scold him good time but knew that in the end it wouldn't change anything.</p><p>She got up from her seat, informing him that she was coming back quickly and went to the counter. She didn't know what to ask but the man needed to eat and a lot with that. She was going to have a little chat with Yashiro-san.</p><p>She had missed him so much, she was glad to know that he hadn't spent all of his time alone. She came back fast and sat again in front of him.</p><p>He paled a little when he saw the food tray but said nothing. They started eating and Kyoko told him that she had learned that he had just finished filming in Scotland and asked him if it had gone well.</p><p>He answered her questions and they naturally fell on topics of work but Kyoko was feeling a strange impression. It seemed to her that he was agitated. He kept shaking his leg and seemed to spend his time avoiding her gaze then looking at her and then again.</p><p>He asked her how things were going to be about her work abroad and she explained that she would probably spend half her time here and the other half abroad.</p><p>He seemed to ponder at that but didn't comment further.</p><p>He was making her nervous.</p><p>Well, to be fair, the all process had been awkward. She didn't know how to talk to him anymore. What were the matters she could still broach? What were the ones she couldn't. She didn't even know if he was okay. How were things for him nowadays? Was he happier? In a more peaceful mind-set and place? Was he with someone?</p><p>She broke apart her lips to speak, to ask. About something and anything when she saw him struggling to finish his plate.</p><p>She grasped the back of one hand lightly, taking pity on him.</p><p>"It's good. Don't force yourself, you ate more than enough. I'm not going to torture you more than that" she told him with a repressed smile.</p><p>She saw the tension in his shoulders as she touched him and his eyes slowly rose to meet hers.</p><p>He shifted his hand slightly and his thumb brushed the back of her own hand for a second before he brought it back to him. The moment passed so quickly that Kyoko thought she had dreamed it or that he hadn't realized what he was doing.</p><p>With a relieved face, he thanked her for her mercy, completely indolent in appearance but his eyes remained stormy inside his pupils.</p><p>She decided to put it aside.</p><p>She was imagining things because her subconscious dreamed of a more intimate contact. She brushed her hair away from her face with an inside huff and she saw his eyes turning even more tempestuous. She groaned internally. The withdrawal during which she had had no contact with him was too long and she was taking the intensity that was her damn fairy in full force. She was getting delusional with her internal fantasies. She was diving again. Drowning in his eyes.</p><p>The atmosphere became heady and she felt chills running her back.</p><p>
  <em>Where the hell it's coming from? It's like it's a furnace … </em>
</p><p>They looked into each other for a while, unconscious of the time passing until Kyoko not able to handle it more talked.</p><p>"I passed through the lobby the other day and I saw you with Kijima and a bunch of people. You all looked rather friendly and I've been wondering if they were acquaintances of you?" She blurted out, exposing her curiosity and nerves despite what she swore to herself.</p><p>
  <em>After all those years…</em>
</p><p>She had tried to bury those feelings. All this time away. She had tried. So that when she would come back she could keep it.</p><p> The promise. The one to herself. To be a true friend to <em>him. </em>To cherish and watch over him as a friend. To care for him as much as she could. To protect him from those ravaging impure emotions she harboured for him. To preserve those but without giving him the burden of them. So to never show, to never tell, to never act on those emotions.</p><p>And if she couldn't?</p><p>
  <em>If I can't?</em>
</p><p>To stay away from him.</p><p>But right now, on this moment where she was looking at him with as much of a blank stare as she could placated on the face. While she was actually facing him for the first time in all these years, only one thing was gnawing at her, devouring her from the inside.</p><p>The fingers of one of her hands rose in a failed attempt to reach out to him. She closed her fist under the table, her nails scraping the skin so much so she pressed them in her palm.</p><p>He was different that before.</p><p>Desire took her by the throat. The one to reveal each plot that had changed in him. To know how he had evolved, who he was today. To see him move in the world that was his and rediscover the actor he was now.</p><p>She abruptly sucked in a gulp of air when the extend of her greed revealed itself to her. She was consumed by such a longing to be close to him and by a hell of a curiosity she felt dizzy.</p><p>The last thing in her mind right now was backing off and keeping her distances.</p><p>But she couldn't. She was not strong enough.</p><p>She just wanted to spend some time with him.</p><p>
  <em>Give me some time…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>…and after…</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>She accepted to get burned.</p><p> </p><p>"They are my friends" replied Ren pulling her out of her thoughts.</p><p>She forgot everything else with the happiness she felt.</p><p>"Seriously? Really?" questioned Kyoko excitedly.</p><p>He frowned.</p><p>"Is that so surprising that I would have friends, kyoko?" he grumbled, seeming hurt.</p><p>She shook her head with a low chuckle.</p><p>"Of course not, she refuted hastily, "But you have to admit you tended to not let approach people usually Kyoko explained.</p><p>His eyes widened for a second but he nodded right after with a grim smile wondering how she has pierced through him systematically.</p><p>Kyoko lifted her brightened eyes to him and with a joyful smile she added:</p><p>"So I'm, I'm happy for you she got out, happy than you don't keep your distance with others as much as you used to do it"</p><p>Affected by her words, he didn't answer right away and Kyoko thought she had said something she shouldn't have.</p><p>"I'm sorry, I know it's not my place to be concerned by that but-</p><p>"No, I-thank you Ren finally said, "for worrying and caring. I"-he sighed. "I know we didn't see each other for a long while but you have no idea how touched I'am" Ren finished as he rubbed his neck, embarrassed but feeling like he needed to be honest on that.</p><p>"But you know, it was all thanks to you Ren added, his adoration leaking through.</p><p>Kyoko blinked.</p><p>"What do you mean, I didn't do a-</p><p>"You did. It was because of you I was able to see myself differently and not-...stay closed off …like before" he explained.</p><p>Kyoko shook her head. The idea he was attributing his progress to her was just too disturbing.</p><p>"But no, I-</p><p>Softly, he took her left hand in his giant one enveloping all her fingers in it and interrupting her protest, not letting go even when she finally looked at him again.</p><p>"That time, at the beach, years ago he murmured with shining eyes as he absent-mindly rubbed his thumb on her hand unconscious of the effect he had on Kyoko while he was remembering this precious memory. "When I confided into you. It was because of your words I was able to begin to really see me as something else than a monster" He told her.</p><p>She opened the mouth to argue but he cut her attempt.</p><p>"I would not have been able to change, to accept things without you Ren admitted." So yes, it's thanks to you I'm able to interact a little more with others today"</p><p>He wouldn't listen whatever she was saying and he proved her by adding that she would better accept his thanks because he wouldn't drop neither her hand nor the matter until she agreed to this version.</p><p>Kyoko sighed and nodded. He was so hell-bent on this.</p><p>"What a stubborn man" she grumbled after a while.</p><p>"It's the pot calling to the kettle" he countered back sternly.</p><p>Kyoko looked at him and he looked back and she burst into laughing making Ren's expression melt a little more.</p><p>"You're right" she granted as she brushed her tears away.</p><p>"I know" Ren answered.</p><p>They both stared at each other and were soon lowly chuckling again.</p><p>"It's good to see you" Ren uttered after calming down.</p><p>A light hue appeared on Kyoko's cheeks despite her best efforts before she answered.</p><p>"It's good to see you too". Her expression so soft for a second he coughed to the restlessness she was putting him in.</p><p>They soon has to go but Ren was content, feeling that though he would need a lot of time to be able to say he knew her again she was not against the idea to return to their blooming friendship of the past if her agreement to spend time with each other once a while when he proposed it was any tell.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope will satisfy any fan or reader that needed fluff. I wouldn't let you down. Though, as you can see, it's mixed with something else ^^ Tension is rising ^^^^</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0040"><h2>40. Things taking place</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sitting on a desk, she looked at them in silence. Today was the second session with the new recruits from the Love Me section and still feeling so uncomfortable giving them any advice, she had offered them something. Before she even decided what they could do together and what they could learn from each other, she wanted to get to know them a little more. Therefore, she offered to do nothing more than stay together and take care of their business. Today, she would observe them.</p><p>During the next session they would tell her who they thought they were but today she would be content with their names and a silent observation.</p><p>In the large room filled with lockers, sofas and pink coveralls, she had noticed that the eyes of some had softened a little but the majority remained hostile to her.</p><p>She may have heard some derogatory remarks on the way in which she took advantage of her stay abroad to have control over them and draw as many contracts towards her but she ignored them.</p><p>Technically it was not completely wrong. If Kyoko had not lived abroad and been an actress there, it would not have been so easy for her upon her return. She was still a newbie when she went to the US, she couldn't blame them for seeing it that way. They also didn't know what she had done there for most of them. Even if Japan had not remained as closed in on itself as in the past, it was common to ignore what was going on in another country and even what the actors and people who went there did, except for the fans.</p><p>And somewhere, Kyoko knew that she had been very lucky with how things had turned out for her over there.</p><p>She didn't pretend to know better than anyone, let alone be better than anyone. She did not particularly want to start again here with advantages as soon as she returned. She knew there was still a long way to go before she could proudly say that she was a truly experimented actress such as Kuu Hizuri or Ren. Despite all of this, she was no longer a newbie. Not an expert in her eyes but she knew acting, she had practically only lived and breathed through the play in recent years.</p><p>And if there was one thing in which she had gained confidence it was that. Not an expert, no. But she knew what she was doing. She knew how to build a role, how to wander in the world of show business. And she wouldn't back down from anyone, wouldn't refuse any challenge when it came to the play because she knew herself capable to rise to it.</p><p>As a result of what, they were right down the line except for one thing. Acting. She finally had faith in her play and wouldn't let anyone take it from her. But they ignored that, so it was only natural they doubted her abilities.</p><p>She wouldn't prove them wrong however.</p><p>She had seen what the systemic need to prove its worth could do to the hearts of people. It was an exhausting and useless fight with oneself. Kyoko had started to understand what her weaknesses were, to take them on. People who did not love her as she was would never love her and there was no point in struggling in a vacuum.</p><p>She knew she had talent, value as an actress and that was all that mattered to her. She couldn't necessarily say the same thing as a person but she knew the skills she possessed and of which she could be proud.</p><p>If they wanted to know, they could always ask but bragging about just to show them that they were wrong made her want to throw up.</p><p>She closed her eyes for a moment lost in certain memories. A person, a knife on the throat, begging to be hired for a role. A director, unmovable; shaking his head.</p><p>The edge of the blade going deep into the sensitive skin of the neck. A geyser of blood splattering the technical team.</p><p>Even with all the imperfections that someone could have, no one should ever find value in the approval of others.</p><p>You couldn't force a person to love another one. No one could.</p><p>You could just show who you were and what you were capable of. And hopefully some people might appreciate you for yourself. But in some cases, you just weren't what the person was looking for, not what they liked and nothing you could do would ever change that fact. Despite how much you could wish for it.</p><p>Kyoko knew this only too well.</p><p>She opened her eyes again. All of them were ignoring her beside the closest group to the desk. She looked at all of the recruits. Several groups had formed and she was already discerning difference between them.</p><p>A pile of magazines had been placed in the centre of the room and several people had drawn from it. Seeing the reaction and the half-voiced complaints of a group of people, Kyoko deduced that they liked little what was in those.</p><p>She watched the magazines remaining on the coffee table. It was mainly magazines on the actors and actresses in vogue at the moment and what roles they had played. The few people who made funny faces while reading were the most hostile towards Kyoko. Whenever they felt observed by her, they threw him disgusted glances or other grimaces not very distinguished. It was also fairly straightforward.</p><p>Another group chatted together without much interest for anyone or even for their discussion themselves if she had to believe the faces of boredom that most harboured. They seemed a bit lifeless but Kyoko couldn't decipher much more from them.</p><p>The third group was of only two people, really focused on their scripts and completely closed off. She might be able to guess that those two were passionate about whatever they were doing and that they didn't like crowd much. But it was mostly a guess, far from a formal clue about them.</p><p>There were also three recruits that had totally isolated themselves from anyone else. Once was also reading a script, another listening to some music in earbuds and the last one, a female, writing something with enthusiasm.</p><p>The one who was reading his script seemed curled up on himself as he stood apart from the others. He stood out for the aura he carried with him, dark and worn. Such fatigue appeared on his face and it looked like the script was the one that brought the other alive and no longer the actor who made the script alive so much he clung to it.</p><p>More than interested in this, Kyoko was feeling worried about this one. She quickly decided she would not take each of them in one go but by the little group they had formed and she would start with this one.</p><p>Then come the last three, very close to her, she could actually hear their conversation while they were chatting and giggling about what they were reading. Another magazine.</p><p>Which was no wrong as such but Kyoko was trying to grasp little things about each of them and beside the names she finally had, it was hard with the ones that either hide what they were to everyone either was not concerned that much about such a thing.</p><p>Not that she could be the one to talk. She didn't like sharing personal stuff that much either but since the president asked her to spend time with them, it should means he thought she could do something with them, for them.</p><p>She eyed the teenager boy as he sat on some chair in one of the far away corner of the room when the girls close to her came in front of her with excited expressions.</p><p>"Excuse us, kyoko-san" started a cute girl with wavy hairs around fifteen or sixteen if the notes Matsushima-san gave her were right as she bowed a bit to her," but last time we couldn't help to notice when Tsuruga-san came and it seemed like you were closed so we were wondering if-</p><p>She waited for the girl to continue, repressing a want to shake her head. Of course, it was about Ren. With the way he had come last time, how could they not have notice him.</p><p>"Are you two together like together-together? Abruptly asked another girl with a ponytail and Kyoko stared at them not expecting this question.</p><p>"No we are not" She replied, holding her buried wishes firmly in control.</p><p>"But you're close" insisted the same girl.</p><p>"We are friends" Kyoko told them. "Why the question?"</p><p>They looked at each other like they were hesitating before turning back to Kyoko once more.</p><p>"Well, in this said the first girl as she showed her the magazine, there is an article about him and we were wondering if you could confirm some of things said in it" explained the girl.</p><p>Kyoko smile, remembering the girl's name at the same time.</p><p>"Well, Emu-san, I would be a very bad friend if I was sharing his secrets with every person asking and as you probably know by now, I just came back so I don't know much about what he's doing right now or what's his life. We didn't have the chance to stay in close contact while I was abroad" she said as she eyed the magazine. "Is it really talking about Ren or about popular actors in general? Asked Kyoko.</p><p>The girls seemed disappointed but answered nonetheless.</p><p>"No,no it's really several pages just about Ren. It's an interview" The third one with short straight hair told her.</p><p>"Can I see?" Demanded Kyoko.</p><p>"You are interested?" asked in return Emu-san, intrigued. "You could ask to the person directly so why bother?"</p><p>"Of course I'm interested Kyoko replied. " Who isn't interested in Ren Tsuruga…" said Kyoko mischievously as she winked at the girls.</p><p>"More seriously, I'm his friend so I want to know about him and as I said I didn't have the occasion to know what was happening in his life at all times so yes I'm curious. Plus, even I were to ask him directly it doesn't mean he would tell me everything that regularly happened in those five years or in the same way. So It's interesting to know the difference between what you tell a friend and in an interview" Kyoko explained.</p><p>"Unless it's on general stuff or things that happened years ago Kyoko added when she saw the dumbfounded expressions of the three girls, I might not know a lot of things"</p><p>"Well, there is a copy of this one on the table so you can keep the one you have in the hands if you want proposed Emu after some awkward seconds.</p><p>She nodded with a grateful smile but she could feel the girl had something still on the tip of the tongue.</p><p>"Yes?" Kyoko inquired when she saw Emu hesitated.</p><p>"When you said it like that, it sound so lonely, like you were very sad of that fact so I was wondering if you had had an argument or of Tsu-</p><p>Kyoko shook her head and smiled.</p><p>"The man had been a lot too adorable. And no, it wasn't because of some argument. If anything, I'm to blame. For some personal reasons, I had to take some distance with well-…Everything. And though I think it was necessary, some part of me already regret having to stay as much away ay I did Kyoko uttered in a whisper at the end.</p><p>She apologized when she realized what she was saying.</p><p>"I shouldn't talk about things like that. That's my issues. Just know, Ren didn't do anything wrong" Kyoko finished.</p><p>The three girls a bit dazed, nodded and left with all the others as the time had flew while they were chatting.</p><p>Kyoko quickly explained she would separate the sessions for now on as she was figuring out how to do things with them. And as such she would do things with the groups they had formed. One group at a time even it means only one person. At last she also caught the boy before he exited to inform him, he would be the first one and to take walk shoes for next time.</p><p>Grabbing her jacket, bag and the magazine, she closed the door behind her and left LME buildings, going home to paint new her walls, one of things she still needed to do in her new flat.</p><p>…</p><p>                             </p><p>She went home using the car rented a week earlier. When she arrived at her apartment, several lights were shining in the heights of the complex. Kyoko climbed the few steps of the front porch and twisting the key in the lock she pushed open the old door with a sigh, entering directly into her apartment on the ground floor.</p><p>A luxury which she could only subscribe to for two reasons, she needed at least a small garden for Snow and this was only available if it was located on the ground floor, an existing garden indeed in the rear of the building. The second reason for allowing her the main entrance was that she had shown little difficulty. Indeed, there were few places available next to the garden and the owner therefore paid largely the lofts downstairs. Except that, kyoko still having her other apartment to maintain and a motorcycle to reimburse, she had preferred to save for the moment.</p><p>So she had chosen one of the lesser locations because it was in poor condition. In fact, despite the very advantageous access to the apartment, it wasn't use anymore because inside the interior required some adjustments. The plumbing had to be checked when she arrived, and the only changes she had requested in advance was the possibility of connection. It was also poorly furnished.</p><p>She had arranged for someone to come for the bathroom and other sanitary the first week. Bought some furniture the second one. But she still had to repaint everything.</p><p>Activity Kyoko was planning to start today.</p><p>In fact she was planning to do so as soon as she would be changed.</p><p>Strolling between several boxes not yet unpacked, she pushed open the door of her bedroom</p><p>Strolling between several boxes not yet unpacked, she pushed with the tips of her fingers the door of her bedroom in development and putting aside another full box, she removed the outfits of today, stripping off her pants in swifts moves and dropping her thick blouse on the bed.</p><p>She was having a hard time getting used to the weather again. She was getting warm all the time even when to all Japanese people it was already cold despite the fact they weren't even in the high of winter. And then, it would feel chilly all of sudden so she would put something warmer on then too hot again. It was getting a little annoying at last.</p><p>Still, for what she was planning right now she could be confident she wouldn't cool down any time soon.</p><p>She bent to her dresser to look up what she wear and the longs locks of her hair glided against her arms, tickling her and covering her nude chest with them. Kyoko did not like the bra very much and putting aside the sport had little use of it compared to women with huge bosom. Thus, she avoided wearing one as much as possible when she could evade the restraint and could ward away from people's eyes the concrete fact she wasn't wearing one.</p><p>Though, with times she had vaguely realized she was starting to take less and less attention to that fact and not anymore conscious at all times of which side it was as she was caring no more. It was nothing to be ashamed of after all.</p><p>Kyoko shook her head at herself. In some ways, she had changed a lot, yes. But she wasn't sure she could attribute it to her stay in US. Because it didn't feel it was something confined to US. Not in this in particular at least.</p><p>She had always been someone who knew what she wanted and when faced with other cultures, views, that tended to express themselves more and fight loud and clear for some rights, diving in all of it, Kyoko had to face upfront what she believed in. She had to wonder deeply what were her values, what would she stand for and what would she never cautioned.</p><p>It had made her learn so many things about herself. About things that were important and things that weren't.</p><p>For example, she could understand the modest Japanese culture, until one point. She had lived through it so a part shared those beliefs and agreed to it. And on rational reflexion she didn't think it was wrong. As long as it was under wise grounds. Preventing a mother from breast-feeding a new-born in public when they weren't any other choice didn't seem sensible whenever the country people would protest against it.</p><p>But under other circumstances than urgency, that some people might feel uncomfortable around exposition of any thing relate to sexuality or nudity in public seemed understandable.</p><p>Yet, it didn't give the right to tell all the women what to wear under the pretence than it was sexual. If women were to follow that, considering global society had objectified women, they would need to go out more covered than nuns.</p><p>In short, as long as she respected the boundaries of others, it didn't seem unacceptable to not wear a bra if she didn't want to. Among other things.</p><p>Kyoko remembered an amazing quote of John Stuart Mill she had read a few years ago that said "My freedom stops where that of others begins"</p><p>It was nothing more that.</p><p>Yes, she had become a little bit feminist. Not like some extreme people. But enough to understand that some basic principles were just fair and square to apply.</p><p>Equality.</p><p>For as much people as possible and as in many ways you could.</p><p>As such, even if she knew Japan was reserved and she had loved that part in the past, she couldn't agree to it completely anymore, she couldn't drop everything she had learned and what she believed in just because she was back. It would be like denying what she had become.</p><p>She put on an old oversized t-shirt to which she tied a knot below her bust revealing her belly which if it seemed a little chilly for the moment would be more than welcome in half an hour.</p><p>She put on an equally worn Bermuda shorts and as her hair slipped once more before her eyes, it reminded her to tie them and she grabbed a hair clip, lifting and loosely knotting them.</p><p>Leaving aside the idea of putting on some shoe when her feet would soon be covered in colour, she closed the door behind her and returned to the small living room empty of objects if it were not for the few full cases. That and her sulky cat on the counter nearby in the kitchen.</p><p>"I will install a couch soon where you would be able to sleep and feel warmer that on the cold ground so stop pouting" Kyoko told with some rubbing of her hands. Snow ignored her blatantly and jumped on one of the cabinets fixed above where Kyoko could stow cups and glasses and showed her backside, clearly displeased with her esclave.</p><p>She sighed.</p><p>
  <em>I really need to buy a couch soon…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko climbed the narrow staircase fixed to the back wall of the living room leading to the small attic used as the second floor and deposited the boxes two by two. With the room clear, she went to look for tarpaulins, rollers, brushes and of course paints.</p><p>Once installed, she settled herself on the stool and grabbed a paintbrush, starting to make the wall with the window overlooking the common garden. Painting the outline on the edges touching the ceiling of a pretty very light sky blue colour, she hummed with the music passing in the background that she had just put on.</p><p>Feeling in the mood for some cheer up songs and valuing this time on her own, the disc playing was one of her favourite fairy-tales songs playlists.</p><p>Beginning to sing as a new song began, she switched to roller and began to apply the paint on the major surface of the wall.</p><p>She was coming down from the step when she felt a furry thing around her legs. Her cat.</p><p>"Climb down or you're going to finish full of blue spots" Kyoko warned and Snow miaowled at her but didn't listen.</p><p>"You're going to take a bath if you end up with paint on you" She threatened her after pushing her down several times didn't work.</p><p>Snow brushed it off of course, damn stubborn cat and even climbed higher and rubbing herself to Kyoko's thigh in hope of getting caresses.</p><p>Distracted, Kyoko put paint on her face and grumbled as she tried to stabilize herself.</p><p>"My hands are full of blue paint so no I'm not going to pet you" she told her," and unless you want I paint your own face that same way you made me do on mine as payback, you will stay put" Kyoko grumbled as she rubbed her face on her t-shirt. "And you are rubbing your white fur on the trails I made on my pants"</p><p>Not that this crazy cat cared, she didn't know any boundaries.</p><p>
  <em>A bath. She will have a bath, whether she like it or not.</em>
</p><p>Next move was when Snow tried to jump in her arms and Kyoko cursed loudly as more paint tumbled off the roller plashing on her feet and the still not too tinted fur of her cat thanks to Kyoko efforts to spare her.</p><p>
  <em>I knew shoes would be useless…</em>
</p><p>She decided to pay not mind to it as she knew she would have to wash herself in any case and resumed her painting. A new song begun and she sang along for a while.</p><p> </p><p>Two hours had passed and she was singing <em>I see the light </em>with Mandy Moore as she was proceeding on a second wall in beige this time when the bell rang.</p><p>Covered in beige and blue and a cat under the arm so that she wouldn't stick her nose in the paint bucket in curiosity, Kyoko went to see who it was.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>^Snort Snort...buahaha...I so love this scene.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0041"><h2>41. Things taking place-part 2-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When she opened the heavy door a pharaoh, long golden skirt, sandals but with a thick vest for the top instead of the classical nothing was facing her.</p><p>The man turned to her with a grin and closed his phone.</p><p>"Hello Mogami-kun, I'm sorry if I'm bothering you but-</p><p>He stopped mid-sentence, seeming to bug opened-mouth and blinked once as he fixed her.</p><p>"Well, Mogami-kun, you're dressed even more flamboyantly than me today he said, a natural smile coming to his face in front of her attire.</p><p>"What could you be doing to find yourself with…so much coloured enhancements on you? He wondered, clearly amused.</p><p>"Repainting my interior" she declared, amused despite herself at his choice of words.</p><p>"You sure, it's not your cat you were trying to aim for?" he asked again staring at the creature in her arms with perplexity.</p><p>Kyoko looked down and a grin escaped her.</p><p>"She wouldn't stay put and away" Kyoko explained as Snow squirmed in her arms and went back inside. " She will have a bath tonight"</p><p>Lory chuckled.</p><p>"Something she will not like it" he commented.</p><p>Kyoko nodded.</p><p>"So, I'm sorry because it seems I'm really troubling your activities but I had several things to talk about to you and I thought you might be more comfortable discussing some of them at your home that at the agency He started and confused, Kyoko looked at him.</p><p>"Again, sorry to disturb your privacy repeated Lory, I would admit I wouldn't do that if it didn't concern sensitive matters for most of them"</p><p>Light appeared in Kyoko's eyes when she understood what he was talking about and she nodded.</p><p>She effaced herself to let him pass and he thanked her. He looked oddly uncomfortable for once and Kyoko would have laughed if the reasons behind his awkwardness weren't such a source of bad memories for her.</p><p>"On more positive grounds, I also have a role offering for you I'd like to discuss he added as he humbly entered inside.</p><p>"I'm sorry, she apologized, I don't have a proper couch yet so I can only propose you this humbles chair for now "she added as she placed two chairs at the counter of the kitchen and cut off the music under the arched eyebrow of the president.</p><p>He shook his hand.</p><p>"I stopped by unannounced and anyway I don't mind it. I'm already sitting too much as it is said the president. "I would ask you to even seize this chair but I'm too used to my comfort he added, shaking his head at his own indulged self.</p><p>She proposed him something to drink and he finally sat while she avoided putting any part of herself anyway beside her hands that she had just washed.</p><p>She looked at the president expectantly and he pulled a constricted grimace as he grabbed something inside his vest.</p><p>"Here" he uttered as he pushed two envelopes toward her.</p><p>She arched a brow at him.</p><p>Spacing the two apart, he pointed at one with his forefinger.</p><p>"In this, you have address, hours of visit and decision of tribunal stating they would be in for at least the next 15 years the president explained to her, because I thought you might want to see their faces upfront once"</p><p>Comprehension hit her and she nodded sharply, thanking him in the process.</p><p>Closing his hand on this once, he pushed the other envelope with his knuckles, a frown marring his face as he did.</p><p>"This one has another address he finally said after much hesitation; it wasn't an initiative on my side. She asked for you"</p><p>Kyoko took the paper delicately, like it could bite her before looking back at him, knowing well who was the <em>she</em>. But she still asked.</p><p>"What do you mean, boss?"</p><p>"She wants to talk to you" Lory clarified, But don't feel comply to do it, nothing force you to" he added after seeing the shadow of pain passed on her face.</p><p>Kyoko smiled at him but didn't share her thoughts with the president.</p><p>"I'll think it over" eventually told him Kyoko.</p><p>Lory accepted her reply without pushing further, he knew it was no safe ground from the start.</p><p>"There is only one thing I want to check with you before going to merrier lands he started again, and that is: How are you?"</p><p>Kyoko tilted her head, not getting it and a bit distracted as she was trying with great effort to not scratch the paint that was starting to dry off.</p><p>"I mean, are you okay concerning all of this clarified the president, you sure look more stable than years ago when you left and you took what I just told you about rather calmly but I wanted to be sure you were okay.</p><p>Kyoko smiled warmly at her president, moved he had been worried about her. She forgot he was such a softie deep down through and through; despite his scheming.</p><p>"Yes, I'm okay, president she assured him.</p><p>"It took a lot time, fighting with myself and a lot of sweat in a gym but I think I can say I'm okay though I won't ever forget and I also began to be kind of in the spirit of feminists, Lory smiled at that and Kyoko smiled back, I was able to let go of most of the emotional pain that haunted me for a long while"</p><p>"Today, there might be rain and bad days sometimes but it won't ever shift to endless nights without sun at all Kyoko continued, so yes I'm good. And I can even say that though It was learned in hurt and suffering, I still wouldn't be who I'm today if I hadn't go through all that and though I can't go to the point of being grateful of the experience and forgave them completely, I'm still grateful for what I learnt from it and how much stronger it made me" she finished with sort of a bittersweet smile.</p><p>The president doubtful looked at her for some long seconds, searching, looking for something in her eyes then breathing a less tensed sigh as he finally relaxed a bit and graced her with a proud amazed grin.</p><p>"I'm really relieved to hear that if it's true he mumbled rubbing his face with his hands as he did so. "You didn't let anyone help you while you were abroad so I was concerned you were only bottling up and up without seeking out for any hand…I know too much what it can do to someone and I didn't want you to go through that if I could help it", an old frown forming back on his forehead, undeniable sign of endless worry she was sure of it.</p><p>Slowly, carefully, Kyoko rose from her seat and stepping aside the counter, she hugged the president. She couldn't help it. After all the care and the things he had done for her, she couldn't any way to express what it meant to her.</p><p>"Thank you president. For caring, even a little for me. For accepting to help me all these years ago. It meant a lot and I couldn't be happier to have as my boss again and for the agency" Kyoko mumbled when she let go.</p><p>The president gave her a complicate smile. It wasn't just a little. He cared so much more. He came to consider her much like family and it had only grew with times he saw her spend times with Maria in the past or the moments he had the honour to see or share with her. But Lory also knew she wasn't ready to hear that. Not yet. She wouldn't believe it if he told her now. He hoped however that a certain young man would be able to fix that in the near future.</p><p>"It was the least I could do" he answered kindly at last. He shifted and a slow grin made its apparition as he started again. "Now that we discussed all sensitive matters, I would like to talk about another subject. A job opportunity in fact.</p><p>It's all hush-hush but here is already a slight idea of the script. Also I would like for you to meet one of your partner. The director is Shingai and he asked for both of you to meet and see if you're both okay with it"</p><p>Kyoko listened carefully and nodded.</p><p>"So, if you agree and that person is free right now, will you allow meeting him here? We could wait and meet at LME buildings but this person isn't available easily so I thought if we had the occasion it would be too bad to pass up. Plus Shingai is very impatient to secure you both" The president proposed with a flaming gleam in the eye.</p><p>She thought it through for a second and finally agreed making a meeting here though she pointed with the state of her place it wouldn't be very comfortable but Lory brushed it off and when Kyoko gave her okay he sent a message, biting the inside of his cheek to prevent any weird sound of glee to come out.</p><p>***</p><p>Coming from an appointment and making his way through LME with Ren by his side, Yashiro looked at his phone with a new grin forming. Ren had asked him to alleviate his schedule a bit and they had just finished setting the planning up. They crossed the path of Kotonami-san and Hiou-kun walking together and the young woman burst out a laugh at the mere sight of Ren under the confusion of her companion.</p><p>Knowing perfectly well why Kyoko's friend was amused, Ren muttered a bit and was resuming his way when Yashiro stopped him.</p><p>"Ren, would you mind if we stop by a place to meet one of your future partner for the <em>soul's fighter </em>movie. Apparently the president is over there for some personal matters and asked if you could come and you know Shingai-san put the condition the three main actors would meet beforehand and before any possibility of signing a contract and getting the role Yashiro explained.</p><p>Ren agreed without any reserve though an odd foreboding feeling crept his way inside but he brushed if off.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0042"><h2>42. Our paths intertwine ~First knot~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The car is moving and Ren saw the landscape scroll as they moved away from the city center. The buildings passed and went away as they drove and Ren couldn't take his thoughts off the lunch of three days ago. He had been able to call her. He knew he could see in the future days but time seemed mired.</p><p>A new frenzy had been tapping him since her return and he could not detach himself from the feeling that he had only a short time, that she would only be there from time to time. And so would he.</p><p>The disturbing feeling that he no longer knew who she was haunted him. And the impossibility of remedying this because she wouldn't let him, because she might not want to be close or just because they would be busy drove him mad.</p><p>He forced himself to watch the road as he progress in the peripheral zone of Tokyo. He stopped in one of the polished but slightly less populated areas. His GPS indicate he had arrived.</p><p>He opened his door and came out of the vehicle. Yashiro came out from the other side, a neutral expression perfectly calculated on his face.</p><p>"Do you think it's near from here?" Ren asked.</p><p>"I'm sure it is" Yashiro assured.</p><p>Taking his phone into hand, Ren followed the directions and climbed up the steps of a porch leading to a renovated old door. He rang the bell after a second of hesitation. It didn't seem like the right place to have a professional meeting.</p><p>He waited patiently and after a few seconds, a locket was unlocked and the door opened. His eyes popped out of their sockets at the view that greet him. A new jittery feeling begun in his core.</p><p>
  <em>What…the hell… is that…?!!</em>
</p><p>"Ren? What? How?" She said, surprised but he wasn't able to answer. His mind was blank.</p><p>In fact the only part that still worked was his eyes. A bit too well even. And those ones were raking her silhouette with astonishment, marvelling as much at the paint than at the attraction's impetus her attire had on him, at the curves showing. He breathed in and out. In and out.</p><p>"You…Paint…"He scrambled to get out noticing his brain had just given up on him at the moment. She had paint everywhere. On her t-shirt, pants, the part of arms uncovered, on her smooth tight belly, in the neck and sensual collarbones, on her face, a little bit in her hair and even on her cute little toes.</p><p>"Wow, Kyoko-chan, you're coloured today Yashiro commented, biting his cheek to repressed throttles. I hope we are not bothering you but is the president here?" She nodded to him then turned back to Ren.</p><p>"Yes, I was painting back my walls when the president came and I still didn't get a chance to change" Kyoko uttered as she brushed hair out her eyes and tuck it back behind her ear, embarrassed. "Sorry for my attire" Kyoko said extending her arm to the inside not noticing it make the cloth clutch her bust nor how it rose revealing more skin of her belly as she showed him in and stepped back.</p><p>He let out a very weak whimper.</p><p>He wanted to die.</p><p>
  <em>Why…</em>
</p><p>Yashiro pushed him so he would move forward but he locked his feet to the grounds.</p><p>
  <em>Where is the modest girl…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Why aren't you wearing a fucking bra?!</em>
</p><p>He turned an angry and yet desperate face to Yashiro and harshly whispered so that Kyoko wouldn't hear but it sound more like a plea.</p><p>"I'm not entering"</p><p>"Come on, she's waiting for you and the president too. It's for the job and it's the occasion to see her. I know you're dying to discover who is this new Kyoko-chan" Yashiro whispered.</p><p>He groaned.           </p><p>He was ready to plead with his manager and friend, hell, he would even have used puppy dog on him but Yashiro patted on the back.</p><p>"There, there"</p><p>"It's insanity"</p><p>"More like torture but it's been a long time you turned into a masochist with her. It's nothing you can't handle" Yashiro assured and Ren could tell his manager didn't a word just said.</p><p>He sighed and entered.</p><p>"Sorry, I needed a word with Yashiro" Ren gave her as an excuse for the delay.</p><p>"No problem" she answered back and closed the door behind them and a new jittery feeling begun in his core.</p><p>They all went to living space in development and the president greeted them.</p><p>"Hi, you too"</p><p>Observing with acuty, Ren looked around her flat with curiosity registering every details with interest. The boxes still unpacked. The common little garden. The paints on one wall and a half. Her cat in a corner also covered of spots of paint.</p><p>He also used that as an excuse to look at anything but her until they started discussing the subject which was surprisingly quickly settled. They both didn't have any complaints about working together which they indicated in their contracts. They will meet the third party later so it wasn't a problem at the moment. And they couldn't discuss much about it because they only had a short script they had both already read and agreed to it. They were interested. They wouldn't know further until third party had agreed to it.</p><p>So they were finishing the discussion when Kyoko excused herself. Her cat, Snow, was starting to lick the paint on her fur and it wasn't safe for her so she said she was going to wash her quickly. They nodded and Kyoko quickly apologize again she bent and took her cat to the bathroom.</p><p>Ren watched her leave the room with this enhanced elegance until he realized where he was starring at, her butt and he hit his forehead on the counter.</p><p>The two others didn't show him any pity and exploded in laughs beside him before starting to spoof him to whom the better will do it.</p><p>"Issues with keeping your gaze to eye's level Ren?" The president asked smugly and Ren didn't even bother to answer. He was coaching himself to right behaviour.</p><p>"I think it's more about being able tearing his eyes away from her at all than well.., and at the Yashiro eyed him suggestively, just managing to stay a gentleman to the end"</p><p>Then Yashiro mimed claws climbing and whispered to Lory:</p><p>"He's already climbing to walls" and they burst in laughs again.</p><p>"Will you shut the hell up he grumbled and trying ignoring the two meddling idiots.</p><p>
  <em>It's my manager and my boss, it's my friend and my uncle; you can't murder them…</em>
</p><p>Kyoko got out soon after that, rubbing a towel on a wet now clean cat in her arms. She put the cat down and the wrapped up the discussion.</p><p>"Well, said at last the president as he stood from his seat, I wish you good luck in your paintwork, it looks like a lot of work. I think we are finished" Yashiro and Ren stood after him and Ren gazed at the unfinished walls. There were at two and half left. A lot but not unmanageable if there was nothing else.</p><p>"What do you have left?" Yashiro interrogated Kyoko as he eyed the president subtlety.</p><p>"Oh, hmm…", She began as she turned in direction of her unfinished affair," Four walls counting the kitchen ones and the ceiling I suppose, why?"</p><p>"That's a lot" commented the president and Ren at both of them, knowing very well where this was going.</p><p>Still, it was a lot and he hadn't seen her in three days.</p><p>Who was he kidding…He knew from start that the moment he stepped inside he would do his best to stay with her as long as possible, no matter the hurdle.</p><p>
  <em>There is no point fighting it…</em>
</p><p>"Maybe I can help?" He proposed gently and victory grins bloomed on the two other men's faces of the room. Kyoko started to argue immediately that it wasn't necessary. Another thing that didn't changed. She still didn't like to impose on people.</p><p>He smiled.</p><p>"I insist"</p><p>She groaned, brushing her hair away, frustrated and Ren felt his pants tightening. It was definitively becoming one of his favourite moves he loved to watch her execute. He could now already tell she was doing it when she was embarrassed or frustrated. It so cute and so so sensual. He still didn't comprehend how and when the changed had happened. She had always been very gracious and polite so he supposed her innocent graciousness of her teenager self could have a morphed result looking like this in adulthood. So, he shouldn't be surprised. But it remained inexplicably unsettling to see.</p><p>He had chills running his back each times she was doing for god's sake! He couldn't that affected by her, could he? He hadn't even seen her for years, how come his case could have worsen?</p><p>Kyoko looked at him like he had sprouted a second head. <em>Why does he want to paint my damn walls?!</em></p><p>"I can do that on my own, it's not that tiring" She protested, the tone still disbelieving. There is too much crowd in my flat. Get out all of you.</p><p>
  <em>I was already nervous enough with the chit-chat…Can you not all leave so I can relax…</em>
</p><p>Him, dropping at my door had her in a mess all along.</p><p>"I'm sure you've work to do. Acting, remember" Kyoko argued turning to Yashiro to make a point.</p><p>"Actually countered Yashiro-san, "He's finished for today. We didn't quite know how much time the meeting will take so we let the afternoon open"</p><p>"Come on, Mogami-kun, intervened the president, it wouldn't be very gentlemanly for Ren to not propose his help. Plus I think the boy could appreciate doing something than work once a while, he doesn't do anything beside it and sleeping"</p><p>Ren grumbled but turned to Kyoko.</p><p>
  <em>Screw them! I don't care what they think of me, I can't stand it anymore!</em>
</p><p>Please said Ren, activating puppy's eyes level one and Kyoko took a step back. "You agreed to spending some time together when we will have free time, isn't it the best occasion?" And he added a level of puppy when he saw her ready to protest again.</p><p>She opened her mouth several time but found nothing to say and smiled, defeated.</p><p>"It's that funny, she commented, don't blame me later because you bored to death"</p><p>He eyes suggestively her attire and she blushed lightly.</p><p>"You clothes could really suggest otherwise" he said in a rumble.</p><p>"It's messy" she rolled her eyes.</p><p>His shoulders tipped very slightly forward, diminishing the distance unconsciously.</p><p>"I don't care"</p><p>The president shared knowing eyes and backed away saying they had to leave and they absent-mindedly answered goodbye.</p><p>Kyoko shook her head with a smile. It's not like she didn't desperately want to see him. She couldn't deny that.</p><p>"I admit defeat" she stated raising her arms in the air and turning to prepare a share brushes.</p><p>"Great!"</p><p>A little grating feeling coming back inside her seeing his overly cheery attitude, she teasingly chirped up:</p><p>"I hope you have change of clothes because considering the price of the of the ones you are wearing it's that or painting in the nude"</p><p>There was a short intake of breath before he replied he had some in his car.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0043"><h2>43. Our paths intertwine ~First knot~part 2-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.<br/>(I advise listening to I believe in you from Michael Bublé for this chapter)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ren quickly returned with a duffel bag with his change and Kyoko though internally slightly disappointed he really had some, pointed out the bathroom in which he rushed to change. Meanwhile, Kyoko put aside a clean paint roller and a few brushes.</p><p>She didn't know what to think of his attitude but was trying very hard to rationalize. She knew it's been a while but from an outsider view it looked like, since she was back, he was hanging on to her. Or rather as if he was looking for every opportunity to see her. Which was absurd. But she was putting too much thought into it. Okay, they were childhood friends and yeah she knew quite a bit about him and again they had become closer before she left.</p><p>And he did tell her he had missed her.</p><p>She didn’t even ponder it. She knew it was only as  friends. She knew he could be very caring with people he trusted so why couldn't she help to wish for it to be more.</p><p>She allowed herself one unhappy sigh and brushed it all aside. It was no use mull over impossible events. One thing at a time.</p><p>For now, she just needed to survive this afternoon.</p><p>Ren got out rather quickly and they began to paint in silence, awkward to possible until Kyoko propose to put the radio to fill of the void.</p><p>Kyoko hummed a bit time to time when a song she knew came and she swore she could have heard him hummed with her sometimes, a smile hidden in his voice.</p><p>They were mostly done beside the borders connecting ceiling to walls and Kyoko was trying really hard to not sing with one of her favourite song passed.</p><p>He couldn't hear her voice. He could <em>never </em>hear her voice when she was singing.</p><p>For third times she felt Snow climbing back the step ladder around her feet but she was nearly finished with the borders and ignored her this time, too concentrated to care.</p><p><em>Just one inch more…</em>She thought.</p><p>
  <em>Done…</em>
</p><p>Her cat jumped on her back assaulting as she purred and Kyoko not expecting it the least and bent on her the tip of her feet lost her equilibrium. Letting out a short cry she prepared herself to try to land back in a not so painful way when strong arms caught her expulsing all the air of her lungs in shock.</p><p>Once she realized she wasn't going to fall to the ground, she briefly glared at her cat that was licking her paw innocently before asserting her situation. They were standing but he was the only one to touch the ground as Ren was holding her in his arms, one under her bust, another one under her legs. On the few hours that had passed some spots of colour had appeared here and there on his clothes, on the curve of his collarbones and a little one on his nose. It was sexy. It was insanely cute.</p><p>Okay, wrong idea. Do not thing about your situation right now. Do not!</p><p>"You okay?" inquired Ren.</p><p>She nodded with a warry smile. So much for keeping physical distance. It was fairly high dose of fairy right under her nose. She wanted to roll in his scent. Her eyes followed the path of paint around his strong collar and under the shirt. Kyoko wondered if his skin was still as warm to the touch as in the past.</p><p>She needed to step back. Like, <em>right now.</em></p><p>"Thank you"</p><p>He smiled but didn't let go.</p><p>"Can I be put down now, Ren? She demanded, desperately trying to hold her cool beside her inner feelings.</p><p>He seemed to hesitate a second before the arm holding her legs and with a little brush still captured between two prolonged fingers accepted to lower her feet to the ground.</p><p>He let her go but kept his hands at her waist and looked into her eyes with a care that make her throat clench and her insides do summersaults.</p><p>"You aren't hurt?" he questioned, his voice barely above a whisper.</p><p>"You prevented that" She moved her lips, responding in kind and raising one hand efflorescing his forearm without really noticing neither her action nor his little jolt.</p><p>"Good" He kept on the same tone and brushed delicately a lock of her hair behind her ear when he saw her blowing on it to push it aside, an amused glint coming back in the pupil of the eye.</p><p>His worry didn't evaporate from his face completely though and her eyes softened to the sight as her heart beat one mile a minute after his mere touch.</p><p>"Worrywart" She teased lightly.</p><p>He puffed a bit.</p><p>"And what?" Am I not allow"-</p><p>"You are" she dismissed, "it's endearing in fact" Kyoko added, a tender glim in the eyes and he sputtered incoherently for a second before grabbing back for his cool.</p><p>"You-You could have hurt yourself badly, he took a deep breath, it's only natural to worry" He grumbled half vexed, half confused and half happy about her remark.</p><p>She sent him a sceptical bemused look, not convinced the least and Ren huffed pretending to be terribly upset and her merry laugh soon followed his dramatic airs.</p><p>Yeah, Yeah.</p><p>Laugh it away…</p><p><em>Laugh my concern away</em> he thought as he fiddled with his brush not really paying attention to what he was doing between his fascination for her happy face and his half vexed feelings until a dreadful silence came upon the flat.</p><p>Kyoko's face and hair were covered with a very fresh very bright new slash of blue coming directly from his brush Ren realized meekly and he gave her an apologetic grin.</p><p>"Oops…"</p><p>"Oops you say? "Kyoko inquired an evil smile crossing her face as her eyes glimmered with a something akin to a future thrill.</p><p>He raised his arms in defence, feeling the danger but too late and she showed no pity.</p><p>"Come here"</p><p> </p><p>"Kyoko, come on, be reasonable…Ren said backing away slowly, It was an accident" he continued and he saw her cat on the counter slowly leaning on her belly like she was preparing for the show.</p><p>"It sure was" She sardonically said, advancing menacingly to him and proving without a doubt there was no escape anymore.</p><p>"You know I don't mind if you do but everywhere but the hair, you know I have to die them and with wall paint-he attempted.</p><p>"That's also the main reason I'm upset, I had managed to save mine pretty well until now and had hope to not have to wash them today but don't worry it's biologic paint, it won't do any damage to your hair and won't be hard to remove" said Kyoko like she was talking about tortures way.</p><p>Ren wince, seeing his last safety excuse going down the drain.</p><p>"Come here" She said again, stepping forward even more and he had time to think how he wished for her to say those words in more inappropriate circumstances.</p><p>"Hmm…he begun like he was thinking about it in all seriousness, "No"</p><p>She eliminated the distance a bit more and he saw no more other choice.</p><p>"I'm going to fight back, kyoko" He warned, a slow grin forming once he had realized he had no other alternative and his serious started to slip. It was no gentlemanly behaviour to cover a woman in paint and he was still a bit unsure on the steps to take with this new Kyoko but he wouldn't let himself go through that without fighting back and whatever the years passed and differences, he could be certain of one thing. A thing that had been cemented in him since the day she accepted his past.</p><p>He could be himself with her.</p><p>"Let's hope you will" She said with a tempting grin. She was closing in on him like a tigress. Tipping on her toes to the right then the left when he would attempt to move. Barely staying a second immobile but very careful in moving still. Slowly; determinately but with a sharp dreadful elegance. It was really captivating and he had to watch himself to not miss her moves out of distraction.</p><p>
  <em>And fuck!</em>
</p><p>It was turning him on. Damn badly.                           </p><p>She had never been this aggressive when being her, when not being in a role; and even less in a kind of playful way.</p><p>He was a mess.</p><p>"Come on, Ren" she taunted with a wild cheeky smile that did things to him he didn't want to name, "show me you still know how to have fun!"</p><p>He grumbled at her provocation and started to think about an angle of attack, shifting his standing.</p><p>"Your corn's side knew how when we were children and I'm sure Kuon knew too" Kyoko commented sending flying the brush to one hand then to the other and Ren got distract remembering their times as children at the evocation.</p><p>"Or maybe, Kyoko chipped in thoughtfully bringing him back, "you forgot how to" "You're older after all" she added, and you seems damn intended on working to death"</p><p>"Excuse me!" He said roaring in outrage and forgetting strategy, eliciting the rise Kyoko had been hoping for from the start.</p><p>She grinned wickedly and paint flew.</p><p>Splashing his front with blue. Big time.</p><p>"Strike" she said grinning in victory before a shriek escaped her when he caught her and secured one firm arm around her middle-area to prevent her to move away and started spattering paint every spot he could reach with laughing eyes and under her giggles.</p><p>Kyoko laid out her brush full on his face smearing the paint from up to down under irrepressible throttles. When she was done with his face, she attacked his neck with more paint. He tried to stop her but she wiggled away from his grasp and he laughed, chasing her.</p><p>She didn't expect his sudden acceleration and felt herself be lift on his shoulder like a potato 'sack while he chuckled as she wrestled in hope he would put her down. He directed them to where the remaining paint was and Kyoko lost her brush in her struggle.</p><p>"What a savage! Put me down Ren! She shouted though she had to admit she had a nice view of his backside and had to refrain to blush. How could it seem so well-shaped and firm, it was a crime!</p><p>"Nop! " He replied nonchalantly as he was retrieving some paint but Kyoko make use of his need to bend to grab the can of paint of his other side and before Ren could see her move, she unceremoniously dropped the content right on his head.</p><p>He gasped in shock and did put her down this time as she backed off a few steps to take a better look at him, already shaking at his blurry expression. His face was all blue.</p><p> "Hi Smurf" She chipped, tearing up from the repressed laughs</p><p>"You"-He begun, removing thick load of blue paint from his face once and his hair and again. Very carefully. Half baffled but a sort of appraising challenging fire in the eye. "You had the nerve to do this…"</p><p>Kyoko pinched her lips to avoid bending over and losing sight of him because of bouts of laughs.</p><p>"It was self-defence" She pipped innocently.</p><p>A very very sadistic smile made its way on his face and not caring about removing the blue anymore he sagged his stance a bit, a threatening air instantly emitting from him.</p><p>"Oh, Kyoko "he stretched, revenge will be sweet" with a sugary tone. "You had it coming…was the only warning she got and-</p><p>Next second, he had caught her again. It was a cramped space and she hadn't had any room to move because she knew she could have dodge him otherwise. Still, she was now dreading his plans after what his expression had showed.</p><p>Still again. She could be that bothered by it. She was having too much fun. Living in the moment. With moment.</p><p>"I'm so afraid" Kyoko chimed half laughing as he lifted her again but with only one arm this time, around her legs, like his forearm was just a chair onto which she was sat and had to only to stretch his muscle and raise his arm to raise her. It was really impressive and she would have admire it longer if she wasn't curious of what he was planning.</p><p>He chuckled as an answer and with the other arm grabbed one of her leg before methodically sinking her toes in the can of grey paint.</p><p>Kyoko tried to avoid it though she was still amused. It would be so slippery! And a hell to remove but he was too strong.</p><p>"Seriously?" She asked bewildered. Fortunately she had covered the floor with a tarpaulin but it would make it even more difficult for her until the paint would dry or remove.</p><p>"It's gonna be hell to not slip!" Kyoko groaned.</p><p>"That's the idea Ren replied, a wicked grin on his face as she shift to the other foot sinking it even deeper this time.</p><p>She glared falsely at him.</p><p>"It's un unfair move" She state.</p><p>"All is fair in this, it's revenge" And not letting her go, he removed her foot and grab the can with his now free hand. "It really is a shame it's not a more flamboyant colour commented Ren as he stared into the can for a second and rubbed his hair full of blue on her own.</p><p>"Not the hair" She grumbled and Ren replied with a chuckle.</p><p>"Because I don't think grey is the colour that suits you the best" He explained.</p><p>"Suit me but-…</p><p>"Arghhhh!!"</p><p>She choked when a pool of cold liquid landed on her hair, face and bust, even under her t-shirt covering in viscose grey texture and gaped without a word before turning a murdering face to him.</p><p>He threw his head back and laughed freely, admiring with triumph his art with such an alive spark in the eyes and Kyoko couldn't help but stare for a second. Head and body covered in paint, clothes ruffled, barefoot, his lengthy brawny form enhanced by his relaxed pose.</p><p>Only the gristles of his collarbones under the blue paint were strained by his posture as he was laughing, the carefree expression marring his face. He had never been more attractive and charming to her than at this moment, and she felt enchanted at the joy she could feel coming from him.</p><p>Pulling off paint from her face with a hand, she plunged on him.</p><p>…</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you'll like this one. It was absolutely hilarious to write. And that it will satisfy the want needing fluff.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0044"><h2>44. Chapter 44</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Breathless and covered from head to toes in blue and grey, they were now both sprawled on their backs, trying to catch their breath and a chuckle escaping their lips every few seconds. They had lunched at each other with paint for most of the hour.</p><p>"So, you can still have fun" Kyoko eventually got out.</p><p>"Damn right, I can!" He grumbled with pride but still bit of amusement in the voice.</p><p>She giggled and they fell into another blissful silence, recovering.</p><p>After another moment she felt him shift on the plastic they were situated to avoid messing the floor and turned her head to watch to discover he was looking at her softly.</p><p>"I have missed this" he declared.</p><p>"You have missed being covered in paint?" Kyoko asked with an arched brow and an amused twitch of the lips.</p><p>He grinned but replied with severity.</p><p>"I missed having fun with you, kyoko" he corrected," I missed spending time with you. I missed the carefreeness we had when we hanged out as children and the ease and closeness we were starting to have just before you left. I missed you" he ended with such a genuine and earnest Kyoko felt disarmed.</p><p>Touched but not daring or being able to express the intensity of what she actually felt, of the glimpse she just had, she settled to one thing.</p><p>"I missed that too. I missed you too"</p><p>They didn't say more and when her attempts at making him go take a shower first failed, she went for it with a new grumble for the future wash of her hair and the among of work it would need considering the length of it.</p><p>He chuckled some more and said it was well-deserved.</p><p>Laid out on her floor, Ren contemplated the ceiling incapable of formulate a coherent thought in his upside-down universe. A soft smile was persisting on his face.</p><p>His heart was still beating hard in his chest. He was obviously still covered in paint though he was barely conscious of it. The touches still burning his skin. The laughs still echoing.</p><p>His breath was coming out steadily but he felt like he couldn't aspire enough oxygen at once. Such a thing was breathing. And yet he wasn't. And he was, more greedily than ever before. Like it was his first air.  Inconsistent thoughts were forming, dissolving before taking shape. Sensations imprinted in every fibres, every nerves he had. It was searing inside his guts and Ren swallowed, his palate parched.</p><p>Electricity coursed through him making him more put than ever. A true living paradox.</p><p>His being was alive.                     </p><p>No.</p><p>It was throbbing with sensations he had never experimented.</p><p>Not even before the dramatic turned of his past. Not even before things got complicated for him. Even when he was still perfectly happy, a mere child with his parents, he hadn't such a surge of life in him.</p><p>Putting his forearm on his eyes he began to laugh, wildly, barely refraining turning it hysterical.</p><p>What was that?</p><p>What the hell was happening?</p><p>What was he feeling?</p><p>He wanted to roar, he wanted to cry and he kept laughing but he couldn't figure it out.</p><p>…</p><p>The door opened.</p><p>She surprised Ren by being back sooner than he expected, though he had time to calm down, wearing a light pink off-shoulders ribbed sweater dress with some thin white pants, her long hair still wet and unruled she smiled meekly and informed him he could go.</p><p>He rose from his sitting position and locking his thoughts about her current appearance, he wouldn't let his eyes follow the droplets gliding on her light skin, around her face and giving such an engaging comfortable feel he wanted to take her in his arms just so he could roll himself in what she inspired him. No, he wouldn't.</p><p> He thanked her and went in the bathroom.</p><p>Water shattered in billions of little drops on his head as he entered the shower after discarding his painted clothes. The water flowed washing away the paint, robbing him of the colours he desperately needed to stay in his heart. Of the ones he wanted to bury into him like reminders of those new shards of joy.</p><p>His lids closed as blue and grey pooled at his feet and Ren tried to cool down. Opening up his eyes landed on the walls of the cabin and besides them the shampoo and soap. Ren grabbed hold of the shampoo and uncapping it before breathing in the sweet floral scent. He poured a fair amount in his big hand and began massaging his scalp with it humming happy at the scent floured his senses.</p><p>He did the same the soap, basking in the familiar odours and would have want to roll into them would it have had her very own unique scent added to it. He rinsed and come out, drying himself in her soft towels in a daze before looking for the clothes he had when he arrived that he had let here earlier. Founding the pile with his pull, slacks and long sleeves t-shirt; he passed on the pants and shirt. Then he cleansed his jog's clothes as much as he could and after some wringing, he put them in a plastic bag and came out.</p><p>When he got out of the washroom, Kyoko had removed the tarpaulin and washed what little had been on the floor and was currently cooking something.</p><p>"Hey" Ren started and she turned to him. "I had to borrow some soap and shampoo, I hope you don't mind?"</p><p>She shook her head and hey him with a smile too.</p><p>He hooked his duffel bag at one chair and approached her, his eyes gliding. Once again, unable to stop himself. Her gracious but muscular back making him want to kiss his way to the top on it and caress every curves and muscles. Her hair mostly dry curling a bit at the heads and circling her waist amorously. Her slender elongated legs.</p><p>He rubbed his face hiding the view before he would be tempted to stare at more improper places.</p><p><em>It should be forbidden to be so enchanting…</em>Mostly pouting at this unfair torture.</p><p>He closed in and peaked above her right shoulder.</p><p>"What are you cooking?" He questioned.</p><p>She jumped a bit at his proximity then relaxed again and didn't chase him away. Ren was really starting to becoming addict to the changes. She didn't back away anymore. She froze no more. She teased him!</p><p>It was exhilarating.</p><p>"Crispy fish and vegetables" She replied, " We spent a lot of energy with our previous activity, not seeing what her ambiguous words were doing to the poor man beside her, so we need to refill and like that you can't escape" She finished with a grin.</p><p>"I don't plan to ever escape" He whispered too low for her to catch it.</p><p>"Would you like me to take care of the rice?" he proposed and Kyoko turned her face at him with a terrified look.</p><p>"Hey! He protested, I can at least do that" but under her fixed scrutiny he finally added rubbing his neck with embarrassment.</p><p>"I practiced a bit" Ren explained and Kyoko incredulous look made him even more awkward," I should be able to do five no, maybe six dishes now he still said.</p><p>"Now, that's impressive" Kyoko commented, still not quite believing it but mostly not understanding why he would go into such an hurdle knowing his aversion for food.</p><p>He nudged her in the side.</p><p>"Quit mocking me, will you" Ren demanded, "Even I, can improve in cooking if I try a bit"</p><p>"Well, I know Kyoko said with a shook of the head, "But it's the reason why you would do such a thing that is really obtuse" She told him turning back to the stove.</p><p>Ren blushed lightly but didn't answer. He couldn't really say his true reasons, could he? So he opted for an half-truth.</p><p>"I didn't have someone to help me feed myself anymore He told her with a crooked smile "and you would have murder me if I hadn't at least try to eat times to times so well… I needed to manage" "Now, can I have the rice he asked holding out his giant hand in front of her nose with a stern gaze.</p><p>There were so many things that were wrong in his explanations that Kyoko just opened her mouth and stared with a myriad of frowns.</p><p>
  <em>I needed to try to eat…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Times to times…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>And it's like he's telling me, he only accept to eat if it's coming from me…</em>
</p><p>She closed her mouth, giving up. He was trying. It was better than nothing.</p><p>Kyoko chuckled at him and got out the sack of rice from the cabinet before raising it to him with a false worry. If he said he now knew then he knew, she believed him.</p><p>"Don't burn it, please" keeping the charade on.</p><p>He glared at her and robbed the sack from her hand. He was clearly vexed and it was hilarious to watch.</p><p>As told though the rice was perfectly cooked when he proudly handed it over to her and Kyoko couldn't her giggles and they seated themselves at the counter.</p><p>They ate mostly in silence, rather starved after everything and Kyoko had to admit that though his plate hadn't been big he finished it without her having to resolve to threats.</p><p>When they were done, the evening had fallen on them and Kyoko was sitting after bringing some tea when Ren stopped her from pouring it in his cup as his long fingers curled around her wrist making her put down tea-pot.</p><p>"You don't want tea?" She asked and Ren shook his head.</p><p>"I do he said nonetheless, but just for a second" he demanded and she nodded though puzzled.</p><p>He paused for a moment, seeming to look for a way of saying something and Kyoko waited patiently.</p><p>"Do you remember our chat of earlier?" Ren asked, "Just before showing" he added and Kyoko nodded with a genuine smile.</p><p>"I did miss you, Kyoko" Ren repeated, looking at her straight in the eye and Kyoko passed her hand through her hair not able to prevent the light that still appeared at her trouble.</p><p>"I miss-</p><p>He raised a hand to stop her, smiling softly to reassure her. He inspired briefly before throwing caution to the wind and voiced a part of what he really wanted. Running away from her was not something he was able to do. Not anymore.</p><p>"Do you think we could recover the relationship we had before you left? He questioned. "No he said shaking his head and Kyoko couldn't help the throb of pain he she felt before even knowing what he was going to say.</p><p>"Rather, Ren started back settled on something in his head, "do you think we could be closer than in the past?" He pleaded to her with fervent honest eyes. "I know you needed the distance, to have a fresh start. I know and I respected it he said. But you're back. You're back he repeated fiercely like he was asking if it meant he didn't need to stay away.</p><p>She smiled softly, defenceless, what could she do against such a look. She was shaking from the inside at the sincerity he was showing her, at what it made her feel; at how much she desired that those things were more than what they were.</p><p>She nodded and he greeted her answer with a relief look.</p><p>"You're back Ren started again rubbing his neck, but a lot is different and I don't want to pressure into anything but-"</p><p>"But?" she pushed when he didn't continue. She knew it was dangerous to her but she couldn't care less at the moment because it seemed like it meant a lot to him and anyway she couldn't bring herself to refuse him anything when he was asking it like he would die without it.</p><p>"But I want us to be able to be at ease again Ren eventually divulged," to be closer even" He added in a longing tone murmur eliciting deep chills on her back before looking at her through his giant lashes. "Could it be possible?" He demanded.</p><p>Her brain short-circuited for a second.</p><p>
  <em>Damn man!</em>
</p><p>That was cheating.</p><p>She breathed out to composed herself and looked back at him, wanted to strangle her fairy for a second for rattling her so much.</p><p>"Well, Kyoko began, it's true, time had passed and we are different. She smiled at him a bit bitterly. " I know it doesn't change a thing but just so you know, if I had felt I had another choice that cutting ties as much I did, I wouldn't have taken that road" He nodded and let her continue.</p><p>She watched her hands on the counter, now free of his grasp as he had retrieved his owns to his side. She rubbed her wrist, already missing his touch.</p><p>"We were closer than before just prior I left she agreed, but I don't think we were that close either. I was too used to keep you at arm-length"</p><p>He nodded eagerly, his eyes growing of size to see she was aware of that and how much she had changed.</p><p>Kyoko snorted at his reaction.</p><p>"Yes, I'm aware. In my defence, I had thought you were only my sempai for most of the time we had known, not three people at once and certainly not my childhood fairy friend" She explained.</p><p>He grimaced at that.</p><p>"Sor-</p><p>"Don't" Kyoko stopped him. "I was never angry about that and you know it. I already told you that day years ago that I was happy you are corn and Kuon" She said, looking at him with softness.</p><p>He acquiesced in silence, so much more tenderness coming back in his eyes she had to focus to talk.</p><p>"Mostly she explained, the issue was I was too used to treat you as my sempai rather my friend and it was hard changing that completely even after knowing everything"</p><p>"And I-</p><p>She stopped, messing her hair wildly with a hand out of stress and in an attempt at finding a way to convey what she was trying to say.</p><p>Busy looking at her messed up hair that in his opinion was giving a savage sexy look, Ren missed her mumble.</p><p>"Could you repeat that?" He asked, feeling guilty for not paying attention to what she was saying.</p><p>She sighed and repeated louder.</p><p>"I don' think I would have been capable of being normal around you she uttered and seeing his hurt face she added quickly.</p><p>"Not totally at least"</p><p>"But you said you were okay with me being-</p><p>She shook her head again and looked sternly at him.</p><p>"Ren, she started again with a serious face, listen well. You being Corn, Kuon or whatever had never and will never be the issue"</p><p>"But then- he began.</p><p>She sighed and looking back at him, she grinned weakly.</p><p>"I wasn't mature enough, Ren She admitted. She frowned looking for the right word. " I felt unsuitable to be your friend. Not adequate"</p><p>Especially with what she was feeling for him.</p><p>Ren opened his mouth in protest, ready to pounce and she grinned again.</p><p>"I was a teenager, Ren. And for the hell of me, I couldn't understand why you want me as a friend rather than a proper adult" She explained, not letting him replying and continuing.</p><p>"Yes, even after knowing you were Corn she added," Not because you weren't my friend but because I felt I wasn't the right person or that you could as an adult or as equal of you had something you wanted to share or talk about"</p><p>Raising her hand, she stopped him again.</p><p>"I felt inadequate because I felt like child she said, "Which you sometimes treated me as such too" she added with a light grumble and Ren pinched his lips to refrain to interrupt again.</p><p>"Which I was Kyoko agreed."I was a child" She repeated when Ren shook his head in negation. "I was because I wasn't mature enough to realize you might not care about that" she finished with a smile.</p><p>Ren lift his head at that and thought it through until understand marred his face as he was finally getting what she was saying.</p><p>"So, Kyoko started back, a tint awkwardly, I wouldn't have been able to be comfortable at that time. Not because of you but because of who I was and how I felt" Kyoko expressed, letting through a little more truth than planned.</p><p> </p><p>"Then Ren began once more, today, could we try again? He asked earnestly. "To be closer. Like when we children"</p><p>She grinned. Adorable dork.</p><p>"Like when we were children?" She asked, arching a brow. "Are you planning to fly, Mr fairy?" She pondered. "Or like our paint play from earlier?" She teased and he smiled but blushed a bit to her utter disbelief.</p><p>"I meant as carefree and open as when we were children" He corrected.</p><p>She didn't know. It would be hard for more than one reason. Years had passed. She had become sort of a loner. She was still totally irrevocably in love with him and he could never know that.</p><p>"I know it's been long and that I don't know who you really are he addressed again looking at her, but I would like to know who you have become, please" he added at the end.</p><p>He really didn't have to try so much. She already knew she had lost her own game of avoidance. And she wasn't able to resist the pull <em>he</em> was anyway.</p><p>There was no universe where she would have been able to say no when he was reaching out like that and asking for her attention. She wasn't strong enough. And she wanted it as much if not more than him.</p><p>She chuckled.</p><p>"Well, I don't see why we couldn't try Ren-Corn-Kun She said, pronouncing each names purposely.</p><p>The warm from his expression that followed when she said that made her think she would melt. The happiness was oozing from his pores.</p><p>"Thank you" he whispered, looking in her eyes.</p><p>…</p><p>He finally had to leave as he had an early shooting and Kyoko saw him off to her door.</p><p>They bid goodbye and he kissed him on the cheek, once again, telling her he would call her and Kyoko wondered how she had drown herself in this new hole.</p><p>She took a deep breath, shuddering to the core and brought out her phone. Her hands shook. She searched frantically for the addresses of the sort and got out. She needed to expulse the energy. She needed the longing out. She needed to voice this pulse making her heart a ticking bomb. She couldn't keep it inside or she would lose it.</p><p>…</p><p>When he reached his apartment, he opened the door and closed it behind him. The air escaped from him like it was siphoned from his lungs themselves and he heavily leaned back on the door.</p><p>Today was the day he decided, his torture had begun.</p><p>Because today,</p><p>Today, for a very short second, he had brushed it as much as with the tips of his fingers than with his heart.</p><p>He had brushed what it could be.</p><p>He had brushed what it should be. Wanted it to be.</p><p>He had brushed…<em>Together…</em></p><p>
  <em>…</em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0045"><h2>45. Grabbing hold of what's precious</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Weighing his elongated shape on his bed, his mind was rehearsing the whimsical dreams of the past nights themselves echoes of his bewitchment five of a week ago. Like so many sighs of his soul revealing his deepest longings with each night passing.</p><p>Haunted. He was haunted. By his own memories. By the power of his imagination. By impossible wishes.</p><p>He rose from the sheets. Padded away from the bedroom.</p><p>Such turmoil couldn't be allowed. His work awaited him. His life awaited him. Feelings were one thing. But this? He would not tolerate it. He was furious at him own mind and heart. He had other tasks to do. His work. Acting. His passion. The indignity of his state was unacceptable.</p><p>Even more knowing from how little of a reason it was coming from and how poor the chances from happening it was. He was going to fight this. Fight this influence she had on him. Just a little. So that he would be at least able to live his life.</p><p>First thing, evicting all he had inside and pull it out on something.</p><p>The knob of a door cracked open and he advanced to a desk. His fingers skidded on the surface of the desk and he pulled a drawer full of notebooks.</p><p>Ren took hold of a crayon it glided on the blank sheet of the notebook for long minutes.</p><p>He was nearly done when the ping of his phone alarmed him he just received a message in the other room.</p><p>His feet race to it in a second and grabbing his phone he unlocked it impatiently.</p><p>It was her.</p><p>"<em>I'm at the airport with Maria-chan. I'll be leaving soon. I should be back in a few weeks. Don't forget to eat"</em> Kyoko.</p><p>He had recently obtained from her to send messages again when she could and Ren felt overjoyed she was actually doing it.</p><p><em>"I will. Enjoy your time with Maria and say hi to her for me. I hope your shootings will go well"</em> he replied.</p><p><em>"Thank you. I hope yours too. Maria says hi"</em> Kyoko.</p><p>He pondered for a bit but decided it wasn't pushing it, though it wasn't really helping his case in living and thinking normally but ignored that thought.</p><p>
  <em>"Would you mind if I call time to time to check on you?"</em>
</p><p><em>"Haha..Worrying about what this time? I wouldn't mind though" </em>Kyoko.</p><p>He closed his eyes in tortured bliss. He could imagine her sweet laugh as she gently mocked him, thinking once again he worried too much with her safety. He sank on his couch. Barely a week and he felt deprived of life. His eyes ached to see her, his hands to touch her even when he knew he would still not have been allowed to. He felt he was delusional to hope diminish the influence she had on him.</p><p> He didn't correct her though.</p><p>Anything was okay if it meant she didn't mind him calling her. It wasn't a complete lie, he always feel concerned when it was about her. She didn't need to know he was just missing her and that now that he was allowed to, he couldn't stand the thought of not hearing her voice on a regular basic.</p><p><em>"Great. Then expect my bugging calls regularly. Have a nice flight both of you" </em>He texted back.</p><p>A laughing smiley was replied with a thanks and she stopped the conversation.</p><p>He went for a shower. Straight cold one.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Roughly fifteen hours later, his phone pinged again as he was sliding in his bed sheets but it wasn't Kyoko but Maria instead.</p><p><em>"We just arrived. Onee-sama is retrieving our luggage while I wait for her"</em> Maria.</p><p>He was glad they had arrived safely.</p><p><em>"Thank you for warning me Maria. I wish you a good stay with Kyoko" </em>he told her.</p><p><em>"Do you want me to be your infiltrator? </em>Was the text that came next.</p><p><em>"What do you mean</em><em>?" </em>asked Ren, not getting it.</p><p><em>"Come, on Ren-sama. You've haunted LME and every place you would go for the time Onee-sama was gone when you weren't working. I'm not a child anymore" </em>she told him.</p><p>When he didn't answer, too perplexed, a new message came.</p><p><em>"Don't take me for an idiot, Ren-sama. Now I'm older I can see clearly what's happening and that's you're crazy for Onee-sama!" </em>Maria message said.</p><p>He groaned audibly. If even Maria was able to see through him, he was forfeited.</p><p>
  <em>"Am I that obvious?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Just a bit. But I'm also paying keen attention. Don't worry, Ren-sama. I don't think anyone knows beside the ones very close to you"</em>
</p><p>Ren put his face into his hands.</p><p><em>"So, any interest in an infiltrator, Ren-sama? I can be your intel on what she's doing and send you pictures" </em>She proposed without remorse and Ren glared at the phone. She was becoming exactly like the president.</p><p><em>"I don't think Kyoko would appreciate that, Maria"</em> He answered after a sigh.</p><p><em>"It would be innocent pictures and info, nothing too private. What the hell are you thinking about, Ren-sama!?"</em> She messaged and he could tell with absolute certitude Maria was teasing him.</p><p>He couldn't strangle her. He loved Maria too much. The president would strangle him back.</p><p>
  <em>"Maria!"</em>
</p><p><em>"What? Don't you want to know where she had lived all those years? What she is doing when she isn't working? With who she is talking? Which women? Men? How she is looking when she's aware?" </em> She questioned and Ren could feel her snickers all the way to here with just the way she was phrasing it.</p><p>
  <em>Typical Takarada style…No pity in loves' matters…</em>
</p><p>Of course he was curious. Those questions still kept him awake at night, wondering what she had experimented, who she has met. It was incredibly tempting and this evil preteen knew it very well.</p><p>He shouldn't do that. He really shouldn't.</p><p><em>"Fine" </em>he texted.</p><p><em>"It comes with four conditions though"</em> she warned.</p><p><em>"Which ones?" </em>he asked, acceptance of his future suffering settling in.</p><p><em>"I want to be the godmother of your future children. They will all ask for it when the time come and I won't tolerate that" </em>She demanded.</p><p>
  <em>Childr-</em>
</p><p>Saliva went down the wrong way and he coughed, struggling to un-see the images she has just put into his brain. His face felt terribly hot.</p><p><em>"But for that, you would have to actually make those; that's why you need help" </em>She added<em>.</em></p><p><em>"MARIA!!" </em>his text shouted<em>.</em></p><p><em>"Yes, Ren-sama?" </em>She replied, innocent to the brink.</p><p>He decided to purely ignore the comments and switch back to business. A shudder went through him. To have to be warry of her schemes at her age… It was scary.</p><p>
  <em>"What the other conditions?"</em>
</p><p><em>"You need to not forget about me when you'd finally be together" </em>She pipped.</p><p><em>"Maria, you know it's very unlikely for us to-…go that way" </em>He tried to temper her ideas so that she wouldn't rose his own hopes. He knew she didn’t mean any harm with her words so he couldn't really blame her.</p><p><em>"Of course it won't if we don't do anything about it but okay let's say hypothetically speaking, I want those conditions" </em>She compromised.</p><p>Ren felt so tired.</p><p>
  <em>"Fine. Done. What are the other two?"</em>
</p><p><em>"Helping me making her participate to the mask ball I asked grandfather to organize for my birthday this year. She's not sure to be able to be there. I want her there" </em>were written.</p><p><em>"Maria, I can't do that. If she's busy then she is. She might have work that day" </em>He tried to explain to her.</p><p>
  <em>"There is still time. And if it's coming from you, I'm not sure she would refuse you anything if you were really asking her to come…"</em>
</p><p>She seemed to be under a lot of ideas concerning how Kyoko saw him.</p><p><em>"…it's a lot of assumptions of what she might accept from me, Maria. I can promise you that" </em>he wrote.</p><p><em>"What about trying to make her come?" </em>Came.</p><p><em>"I suppose I can" </em>he admitted. God, what was he getting himself into.</p><p><em>"Then, it's all good as long as you try Ren-sama" </em>Maria said.</p><p>
  <em>"Last condition?"</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"Oh, right. Well, supposing I'm right and I'am. I want both of you to help <span class="u">me </span>when I will be the one to have love issues"</em>
</p><p>He chuckled. She was so convinced it would happen. It was actually cheering him up a bit on his chances. Which was what he wanted to avoid but it was too late for that.</p><p><em>"Will you agree to all of that, Ren-sama?"</em> she asked.</p><p><em>"You drive a hard bargain…But okay, deal done" </em>he sent.</p><p>From her side of the world, Maria cheered happily as Kyoko was coming back. Her phone rang, signalling a new message.</p><p>
  <em>"Maria?" </em>
</p><p><em>"Yes?" </em>she answered.</p><p><em>"You're a little demon" </em>his final message said and she giggled happily. Some days, she was really glad to be the granddaughter of her grandfather. She wouldn't have been able to detect the things she did and to tease someone like Ren-sama if it hadn't been the case.</p><p>Onee-sama reached the bench where she was sitting and Maria excitably thought about when he would call her. She had saw something on Onee-sama, just before they embark and she was pretty sure of what it was. Now if she just could confirm it.</p><p>"I have everything. We can go Maria-chan. I hope you will like you ten days stay with me "Onee-sama warmly told her.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0046"><h2>46. Tune of the heart</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Maria pushed off the comforter and slipped out of bed. She yawned. It was the end of the morning. Onee-sama had brought her at her apartment last night and she had barely kept the eyes open enough to take a step after the other. Then giving up she remembered her Onee-san carrying to some room and tucking her in. She didn't even remember what the place looked like; she had been too out of it.</p><p>She stared down and pulled at the pink and black punky pyjamas. She didn't even remember putting this on.</p><p>She creaked the door open of what she supposed was a guest room and peak in the hall.</p><p>White walls with little blue patterns just at the bottom of them. Like little waves carrying from one end of the corridor of the other.</p><p>She followed them until the hall breached into a very bright area and after some further inspections was in fact the living room and kitchen. To the right, he kitchen had a very long counter made in a L-shape. To the left, just a step down from the floor level of the kitchen and covered in wood was the living area with a soft couch and shelves of books, discs of music and movies. And on top of the couch was a very dishevelled Onee-sama, in a fluffy white pyjamas full of cats pattern and a guitar in the hands.</p><p>It's at that moment Maria realized the drumming sound she had been hearing in a sleep induced state was coming from the guitar in Kyoko's lap.</p><p>A sweet melody was playing to the rhythm of the swift fingers strumming the instrument and Onee-san was humming with it, occasionally scratching little notes on a sheet of paper in between.</p><p>Maria promptly snapped a picture and sent it to Ren-san immediately, not caring and forgetting about the time lag and wrote a legend stating:</p><p>
  <em>"Onee-sama can play guitar!"</em>
</p><p>And then she was swapped away by the biggest thing she should have noticed first.</p><p>"Ocean! You live by the ocean!" She exclaimed running to the frameless glass façade and door eating three-quarters of the living and kitchen background wall and making Kyoko jump with the sudden shout.</p><p>Kyoko chuckled eventually and walked up to where she was standing to look at the beautiful landscape with her.</p><p>"Did you sleep well, Maria-chan?" she asked her.</p><p>"I slept amazing though I didn't know the jet lag could be that bad, I still feel tired" Maria said going from excitation to grumbling in a phrase.</p><p>"Then, what about keeping it light today?" Kyoko proposed. "I will have something to do where you can't go later in the afternoon but we can share some breakfast and then we'll go for a walk on the sand if you're up to it. And in the evening I can show you around the area surrounding directly the beach and I'll give you a tour of the city of San-Francisco in the next days"</p><p>Maria's eyes gleamed with delight.</p><p>"I would love that Onee-sama!" She cried out with enthusiasm.</p><p>Kyoko smiled at her.</p><p>"Let's eat for now then"</p><p>They were barely finished when Kyoko's phone rang and to Maria delighted it was Ren-sama enquiring about Onee-san and her. She heard Kyoko asking how come he was calling this soon knowing it should have been barely four in the morning right now and she could the hear the subdued grumbles through the phone of Ren-sama's voice saying he had been woken up by a sneaky friend sending a picture.She giggled.</p><p>It was going to be so much fun over here.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Looking at her phone in the morning hue of light, Maria felt happy right now.</p><p> </p><p>She had spent the last few days alternating walking on the sand, discovering the surrounding nature and areas of the city with the help of her Onee-sama when she wasn't working. And later today, Onee-sama had promised, at Maria's request, that she would show her some of the coolest places of San-Francisco.</p><p>She would also get to meet some of Onee-sama's friends living here and really excited.</p><p>But the cherry of the cake was uncontestably the pictures she had managed to send to Ren-sama. There were only five of them so far but she could feel he was only asking for more because he couldn't bring himself to beg for mercy. She had called him yesterday while Kyoko was at one of her jobs and she definitively heard the delightful slightly tortured voice after her last picture attack.</p><p>Maria giggled sweetly.</p><p>
  <em>Ren-sama is such a masochist…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>How silly of him…</em>
</p><p>She was waiting patiently for Onee-sama to come back from some recording she apparently had so that the promising fun afternoon could begin. Maria didn't know you could have recordings for acting but again she supposed if some dialogues felt off when a director had shot a scene, it needed to be corrected and that could be a solution. She wanted to discover more of the beautiful city that she had yet to really see. Not that you could explore and know a big city in ten days but to discover where her Onee-san had lived and the places she had loved and still does were important to her.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Some hours ago,</p><p>She crossed past the heavy doors of the building in a rush, feeling possessed by what inhabited her. She walked through other doors, not caring, not seeing though some people did greet her in recognition. She was kind of regular here.</p><p>"New song?" A voice asked, reaching her over-focused mind and she nodded, not really consciously.</p><p>"Don't forget to give us the recording afterwards" Came as she left the voice behind.</p><p>She found a vacant studio and pushed inside. She needed to express what was inside. Needed to hear it. She didn't want to forget this moment. She wanted to engrave permanently those feelings. Here. In the open. On something. Anything.</p><p>In the sight of all but safely hidden for the one that really mattered.</p><p>She warmed up her voice and took a deep shuddering breath as she closed her lids allowing repressed things to unload, to pulse outside. As much as it had been ravaging her insides since that afternoon.</p><p>Lips unlocked to share the forbidden.</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>'It's tickling inside,</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Paint is everywhere</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>You're laughing</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>It tickles inside</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>For each rumbling</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>&amp; </em>
  </strong>
  <strong>
    <em>I can't help seeing the colours</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>&amp; </em>
  </strong>
  <strong>
    <em>I can't help to feel this rainbow of life</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>As you carry me</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Deep down I know it cannot be</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Deep down is the grey and white reality</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>But it's tickling inside,</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>For each of his rumblings</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Echoes of life</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>For each wave bubbling out</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Paint is everywhere</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Blue 'nd grey on our clothes, our bodies</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>&amp; </em>
  </strong>
  <strong>
    <em>I can't help,  can't help</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>To imagine the colours without the clothes</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>It's tickling inside and I feel alive</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Drawing out the black and white,</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>The colours shine in my heart</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>It's tickling inside,</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Wishing Ohhh…</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>For a second, wishing…Ohhh</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>It's tickling inside</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>But the colours disappear</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>As the door closes</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Taking away the tickle of your laugh</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>The dance in my heart,</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Taken away</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>It's tickling inside,</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>No more…'</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>(Song written by the author)</p><p>Chills run down her back as she evacuated the remains of her tension with the last wave of her deep clear voice breaking through and her lips closed again.</p><p>"No more" She whispered at last. She breathed in her feelings once more before rudely closing the door and opening back her eyes.</p><p>Kyoko pulled out a folded paper from her back pocket and scribed a title on music sheet.</p><p>
  <em>Colours' painted</em>
</p><p>She went to the record side of the studio and put yet another song on a virgin disc.</p><p>The door opened at that moment and Laze appeared with a charming smile.</p><p>"I heard you were there again", he began, "You have no idea how glad I'm to see you are back with a new song. It's been a long time since the last one and as your contract stipulate, I can't even bring you back at my convenience as it's only when you are inspired because it isn't your job but an hobby originally. It's really frustrating you know He grumbled falsely.</p><p>Kyoko grimaced at having been caught. She was hoping to sneak by and sneak out as discreetly as possible. He was right. It hadn't ever been planned to be something that would of lucrative benefits. One day, she just rented a studio because she wanted a keepsake of what her feelings really were. For herself. She didn't find her voice especially entertaining. She was not a professional singer. Her voice was slightly more low-pitched and deeper than most women singers and a lot more than Japanese women singers. Only the Africans and Afro-Americans' voices were deeper still. Fortunately.</p><p>It was enough like that.</p><p>She had started getting used to record the songs she would have written as tokens of her inner turmoil for each time she had missed him or had went through an intense feeling concerning him or something that reminded her of him but unfortunately someone had heard her three years ago as she was singing another one.</p><p>And that person had loved it. That person had been Laze.</p><p>She had fought against him and refused any kind of compromise for a good year explaining she wasn't doing it to become a singer nor to be famous like that and that on the contrary no one could know she could sing.</p><p>But he had come with such a prefect contract, allowing to dissimulate who she was permanently if she wish, no picture of her on potential future cover of albums, accepting there wouldn't be any live and that she would be kind of a singer with a stage name just for it; that she hadn't been to refuse anymore.</p><p>He had been damn too sneaky and crafty about it and Kyoko still fustigated herself in remembrance of the time she had foolishly accepted.</p><p>Still, as long as he didn't know, all was good she supposed.</p><p>She greeted him and Laze reached out with a hand to her.</p><p>"Can I listen?" he demanded.</p><p>She sighed.</p><p>"Not finished?"</p><p>She shook her head and gave it to him with a weak mumble.</p><p>"It is"</p><p>He pulled back the disc in and the song started for them, an embarrassed hue creeping up on her face as her voice was heard. She was still half into the feelings; they were still shaking a little in her being, not clearly tamed yet.</p><p>Laze copied the song on a USB key once it ended and turned to her.</p><p>"It's marvellous. Really raw and yet bright" he told her.</p><p>She nodded, not looking at him and swearing to herself she would go to the reception to have his schedule so she could avoid bumping into him completely raw with feelings each time she wanted to let go of some steam. She would rather prefer sending it to him later whenever she would have created one than like that.</p><p>"I don't think I will want to change much about it" he said bringing her back in the present," Just send me which instrument you would rather see with it or do a record of with only the melody if you wish" Laze asked her and she agreed before explaining she needed to leave and that someone was going to wait for her.</p><p>Which was true, Maria was surely already waiting. But it was also a very valid excuse to escape this nosy producer. Damn man.</p><p>Thankfully she had now a little studio in her flat she could usually use to do it. Maria was there this time so she couldn't without risking unveil but in that case, it would be a relief once she could use her own studio again. Not that she didn't love to have Maria. She was very happy to spend some time with the young girl but despite her efforts, she hadn't managed to push aside the remaining brushes that time had let on the weak organ that was her damn heart so necessary measures had been unavoidable.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Soooo…First of all, as said, the song is from me…I've taken the time to write it…I'm really happy with it personally. I had the concept for this part of the story from the very beginning. I always envisioned Kyoko as a potential singer but without it being an absolute passion so…</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0047"><h2>47. Chapter 47</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A new ping sounded and Ren who was on break casted a wicked look at his phone. Of course, he wanted nothing more than to go check it out. The past few days had been both wonderful and a living hell.</p><p>The reason?</p><p>Pictures. Evil pictures taken by a little demon.</p><p>Although what the pictures portrayed was not bad, it added to the new amount of things that tortured his stupid enamoured soul.</p><p>Kyoko had been back in America with Maria for five days already and seemed to be having a good time with her. But the pictures welcomed by his phone were in many ways already too much for him. And in others, by far too meager to satiate his appetite. Where was the bombing of promised images? The pictures of what her flat looked like he was owed to receive?</p><p>No such a thing.</p><p>He had, in all and for all got five pictures. That's it. And he had already secured his side of his bargain by making Kyoko promise she would try to come to the mask ball.</p><p>So where was the remainder? All the other little peaks due.</p><p>He stopped his thought with a start. He wanted to laugh at his own turmoil. Here he was, sulking, over something promised by a preteen most likely just too busy having fun to think about anything else and he was holding a grudge? So stupid.</p><p>He grabbed his phone, decided to not care anymore about this. No matter his feelings, he shouldn't have made a deal with a child anyway. And he still felt guilty about the risk of intruding Kyoko's privacy. And he felt even worse about what those pictures made him think about. Dreaming was becoming a risky move recently. And with the fresh memories provided by the recent moments with her, his mind had it a bit too easily with what it was doing. And here goes situations picked and remixed in whatever his mind decided to roll while he is sleeping. He was subscribed to cold showers and thinking about distasteful images every morning recently. When he had even the time to resolve the matter once awoken. Some times, his body had already found its relief and he was divided between an irrational shame over the all thing and the knowledge it was normal. He was no monk. And he was very much attracted by the object of his dreams whether in fantasies or reality. Still.</p><p>There was now paint in Ren's dreams and so much more colours. But, no doubt, it wasn't the focus of those. Paints were just the new real details added to his phantasmagoria dreams. There were no clothes in his dreams. There was a lot more attention directed at this particular point. Or rather on the motion of shedding those. Of them pooling at two pair of bare feet. Of the slow precipitation of raced touches. Of deep scratches burning his back with an agonizing pleasure. Of the texture of skin under his palms. Smoothness to the humid thickness of paint spread by his very sturdy fingers on her spine, on her belly, on…</p><p>He pulled out of his fantasy when he realized he was becoming hard and grabbed a bottle of water from his bag when his phone pinged again in his hand.</p><p>He unlocked his phone and saw a few messages stating Maria's name on it. He groaned internally. He would look at those once he would be settle back in his flat. Else, he wouldn't be able to act the sad angry scene that he was supposed to complete today.</p><p> </p><p>Later on that day, half past ten pm.</p><p>Ren was finally back inside his apartment. Unbuckling, he laid down on his couch for a little while before taking hold of his phone.</p><p>"<em>Hi Ren-san. So, after a full observation during all the afternoon, I'm here to give you my report, </em>his eyes read, <em>I spent today with onee-sama and met a few friends of hers. They were all very nice with me, though maybe is because I'm the younger friend of onee-sama. Kayla is very funny and loves to pester onee-sama very much"</em></p><p>A second message followed.</p><p>
  <em>"I met five friends of one-sama beside Kayla. Lane, Mei, Kyle, Luke and Jake. Of course I don’t know them very much but here are the ones you should be warry of. All the males. Luke and Jake are clearly making eyes at her and Kyle is oddly tactile with her and for a weirder reason, she's letting him. I'm sending you below pictures of all of them"</em>
</p><p>Ren wanted to scold Maria for taking pictures of strangers without their express permission but his interest for Kyoko's friends and a new gnawing jealousy prevented him of taking action and he scrolled down further.</p><p><em>"This is Jake" </em>was the above note of a muscular bulky black man with warm yellow eyes, a square jaw and welcoming features sporting a soft expression looking at something out of the camera angle.</p><p>A lean gnarled but fit man followed. Lighter skin this time, he had black hair and was showing some kind of anguish expression though he was stretching a smile too. <em>"This is Luke, he's kind of edgy but also very charming and kind. He's head over heels over Onee-sama"</em></p><p>Ren clenched his jaw with annoyance. Jake was on board too, he could have bet on it. As if it wasn't enough to fight concurrence here. Unknown men were spending time Kyoko, being close to her and it seems it had been the case for a while now. Not that she couldn't spend time with friends. Ren just wished they were blind and ignorant of the treasure they had in front of them or he could also rule over his jealousy better. But it didn't look like it was happening any time soon.</p><p>He looked at the last picture and nearly broke his phone so much he was clamping his hand around. The poor thing creaked a bit under the strength applied but he paid no care to it.</p><p>On the last picture, a thin man not as dense and not as sinewy as the other too but still in very good shape was appearing, light brown hair and grey eyes illuminating his carefree smiling face. He was also circling Kyoko's shoulders with his arm and she was laughing. <em>"This is Kyle, </em>Maria was messaging, <em>He's very close to Kyoko, I guess you could say he's your biggest adversary right now, Ren-sama. Kisses. Sleep well. Maria"</em></p><p>An unfortunate sandbag ended up in the trash that night.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p>As the weeks went by, Maria returned and the end of the year was soon on the horizon.</p><p>Kyoko was still not sure that she would manage to come to the ball even if she had assured them that she would do her best to make it. However, content with the fact that she answered him without complaint when he called and that they could chat regularly, Ren did not complain. He knew she would be in the same country soon enough.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>The 24<sup>th</sup> in the morning, day of the ball.</em>
</p><p>Hushed steps advance, feminine gait, alongside the snapping heels of a man's boots on the sterile cement flooring. A shiver runs through her and she rubs her arms weakly in a feeble attempt to reinvigorate the frozen limbs. She clenched her fists, squeeze the eyelids shut as she follows the guardian blindly. Very old, really worn out tears run down her cheeks. She wiped them with an angry shoulder rub.</p><p>How much time had passed, how could she still feel anything?</p><p>So, failing to be able to feel nothing, she opted for anger. It would keep her warm and keep her senses alert.</p><p>Glares, snickers and luscious looks.</p><p>Nausea rose in her and she opened her mouth to breath. In and out. In and out. Hyperventilating wasn't helping the matter but she couldn't help it.</p><p>The man besides her threw a worried sad look at her and she asked for a minute.</p><p>They resumed moving soon when she nodded at the man to say she had calmed. Which was half true. She was making work her lungs at least and breathing like you are supposed to again. And standing her ground as they moved forward.</p><p>There was nothing she desired at this instant more than running away from this place. But she was set on not backing away. She needed this. No matter how awful it was.</p><p>She stumbled a bit, catching herself at the last minute. She felt kind of dizzy, like she was drunk. The sensations in her legs seemed numb. Like they were asleep or she was unconscious and dreaming she was walking.</p><p>Cold sweat drenched her under-shirt in her back as they arrive and she clamped her lips in a tight line.</p><p>A door bar gate grated on the ground in a piercing sound as it slide to open the way.</p><p>She passed by the guardian and laid a hand on the chair back but she didn't sit. The man in the cell vaguely glanced at her then snorted, the eyes dead.</p><p>Kyoko didn't say anything to him. She just looked. But it wasn't just a glare. Nothing could describe how murderous her eyes were as they stared at him. It was beyond fury.</p><p>She observed the defeated appearance, the grassy hair, the lack of life and care in his overall being. She couldn't comprehend how the day where she was overpowered by the weak excuse of a man came.</p><p>But she couldn't resolve to talk to him. It wasn't about the trash. It was about her and getting over it. Because she could, that was one thing she would be able and was already doing for a while. But she wasn't sure she would ever able to forgive.</p><p>The dirty appearance turned around to fixate the wall again at some point and she closed her eyes. Nothing was here. She didn't know why she expected she would find something. She never even thought he would give a semblance of apologize.</p><p>It was not worth her time. Her anger vanished, she just felt stupid and empty for coming. And to horrified surprise she also felt some sort of pity for the dude. He was bound to live the rest of his life here, thanks to the president, because he hadn't been human enough, sensitive enough, educated enough maybe, to stop. The others too she supposed.</p><p>She didn't know what prompted her but she felt like she needed to say that.</p><p>"Merry Christmas 'Eve"</p><p>She turned around and left the prison.</p><p>…</p><p>
  <em>Evening of the 24<sup>th </sup>, the masked ball has started.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>She needed to hurry. The ball had already started and most people had probably arrived. She fed Snow and came back to her bedroom. It was much more comfortable since her furniture had been brought and she would have gladly stay in her new comfy place to read a script or a good book but unfortunately several people had guilt trapped her so she had to cave. Saying things like <em>didn't see you in years, </em>or <em>it's Christmas, </em>or <em>it's my birthday </em>or even worse; <em>I'll be so happy if I could see you.</em> The last straw having been inflicted by Ren himself.</p><p>She applied some light mascara and defined her jawline. No more make-up or it would unmask her.</p><p>Kyoko snorted at her inside joke. Everyone would be masked after all.</p><p>She looked back at her bed where her outfit of tonight laid and grinned. She was pretty proud of her idea. It promised to be interesting.</p><p>Now she only had one struggle.</p><p>Fingers reached out in front of her and swiftly grabbed white stripes of cloth. <em>That part</em> wasn't as fun.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0048"><h2>48. ~The Christmas ball~ part one ~</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat. Yoshiki awesome devilish Nakamura does. And we thanks her for that.<br/>Okay, here is one of my pet dreams. A masked ball. Enjoy</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Half an hour before Kyoko prepping, it's 7.30pm.</em>
</p><p>
  <strong>The masquerade begins</strong>
</p><p>A soft and light melody lets hear its distant echoes everywhere through the however thick walls of the great mansion leading countless guests; enthralling them to progress toward the bewitching tune not the less strained by the ballroom. No, it's free of restraints, all focus as it is on spreading the great joy that song contain.</p><p>It's speaking, whispering to any ear around its life and grabbing the heart of the people catching it until they are overcome by the promise excitement of the night.</p><p>Hushed steps begin to rush their advance, in a hurry. And as they wander in long corridors, the awed eyes catch the gold and velvet red hue plastered in every forms possible. The furniture are a deep burgundy, the handrails of the stairs a used golden, little touches of golden paint can be seen here and there, white and red poinsettias seat at several places, other flowers and candles are floating on clear water in vases and bowls and; bright yellow lights are everywhere. Around the ramps, fixed to some walls, in the entering hall on the Christmas tree; everywhere. Tinsels are pathing the ways along the otherwise dark halls in the only illumination provided, main lightning removed, and highlighting  white and silver glasses balls hang, dangling to the ceiling of each corridor.</p><p>Rustles of dresses brush on the obsidian carpet sprinkled with golden sparkling as muffled snapping heels and boots gain ground.</p><p>And then;</p><p>Brightness.</p><p>Albescent slabs forming the flooring of the whopping rectangular ballroom went noticed when the reawaken hard heels snapped on those.</p><p>White light is coming from lampposts fixed to the walls every two meters and leading to a black carpeting dais where enthroned a gigantic magnificent pine Christmas tree.</p><p>The new guests penetrated the half full spot, standing under the brilliant teardrops garlands launching from the centre of the high ceiling to spread in every direction covering the full roof vaulting in an alighted crystal alike web.</p><p>And by stepping into light the costumes get their reveals; the corset dresses, the princesses, pirates, shipmasters, officers, earls, kings and duchesses attires shine under the Christmas lights. The ball is to take place on 1800-1900 theme after all.</p><p>But there is a catch and that's the sheen masks sported by everyone and concealing their identity. Most of the guests now presents, Lory made a short speech explaining the rules of tonight in a few short sentences.</p><p>You could not tell your identity to anyone or remove the mask unless someone guessed who you are. The game of the night was to unveil as many people as you could. The more make-up, the better. The better you disguise, the better your chances. There would be several organized dances between free ones and you would be assigned random partners. You couldn't come with one. You could not know anyone disguise in advance. If anyone didn't respect those rules told in advance, that person was disqualified.</p><p>Once a dance would end, you would have to take a guess on who is the person behind the mask. Presents would be given to the ones with the most right guesses.</p><p>If one wasn't unmasked through all evening, that person would win the game and a special prize. Everyone would get from a small present to bigger one depending of the number they discovered and if some of those would be brought by the guests themselves, most would be given by the president or the agency.</p><p>"You will also be able to bet before the dances continued Lory, and the money of the bets will be reverse to charity to give more chances for foster children to have presents, the bet will only serve to add you points if you guessed right"</p><p>"Whether or not you recognized someone and want to unmask him, try to blend with other than your usual acquaintances. The point of this game isn't to stay with your usual friends but to have fun. Do not worry, you will have time where you will be able to talk to your friends once the first part of the evening ends and the game is finished"</p><p>"Everyone will get one round to The-Wheel-of-Gifts" declared the president switching to the prizes, and as you know in her reside the second and third trips of a week to win for the ones who wouldn't reach first place. The destinations will be contained in a large pre-selected panel of choices"</p><p>"The four and fifth place winners both get a spa day and tickets for a concert/ representation of their choice and 2 runs of The-Wheel-of-Gifts each the president continued. The third place wins 3 days in one of the resorts partners with LME and 3 runs of The-Wheel-of-Gifts"</p><p>"Now to the fun ones" and the president smirked as he continued.</p><p>"The second place wins a 15 days leave without any condition to cash between January and February, Lory raised a hand to cut any form of protestation already starting, do not worry everyone, all the directors and agencies are warned and the rescheduling will be taken care of without any risk once the winner is chosen. I must add this isn't an optional gift, people do not take their holidays driving themselves to the edge rather than taking a leave; we must change that. It's not only a problem in entertainment and I'm sure you all know this. Thus, if the winner of the second place do not choose a date before the middle of February, that person will be force to take the last of that month off whatever the objections"</p><p>"In addition to the leave, the second place will also get two spa days and five chances at The-Wheel-of-Gifts. Also, the winner of the second is the first that will have a taste of The-Wheel-of-Trap" grinned the president as he gestured to another big wheel, all pink this time. It was designed by my hands and some of you might even remember it as it's the second time we use it"</p><p>A few people nodded with pale faces or chuckles under their hands.</p><p>"The person who wins the game said Lory raising his voice with emphasis, gets three rewards. First, a chance to promote himself to directors, producers and publishers supported by LME, the third trip of a week given tonight, to go somewhere with a friend of his/her choice, will be immediately hand to the winner and that person will have 3 months to use it, again it's not optional stated Lory. And finally, six runs of The-Wheel-of-Gifts said the president showing the majestic silvery wheel laying on the dais once again.</p><p>"And,</p><p>Lory chuckled some more, in complete mirth,</p><p>"The winner will also have two runs of the Wheel-of-Traps. Yes, I'm sure at least half of the people here are wondering what it is" laughed the president. "You see, it's a trap because though technically the winners are receiving, they are the ones that will have to give something of themselves. The first person to be discovered will have a run of the Wheel-of-Traps I won't say more until the time of the night come"</p><p>"Ah, yes, sorry, one last thing on this matter corrected Lory, When the time come, you will be able to choose in advance to who, a stranger or someone specific, you would want to give whatever your forfeit will be but you won't know what it will be before choosing the person"</p><p>"My granddaughter is participating to the game square-fair this year said the president closing the subject of prizes for now, and as such I myself do not know in what she will appear but around eleven, unless she hadn't been unveiled by anyone, we will take a short break to eat the cake. For eventual presents or private ones between the guests, we will do it after the game, past midnight. Refrain from giving any presents to anyone until then"</p><p> </p><p>"As you are all aware now finished Lory, the party will be going until at least 3am and the set-up dances won't begin before 9pm and will go on until midnight. Please enjoy yourself freely until then. I hope everyone also remembered to take a second more comfortable outfit for the second part of the night and please inform Ruto if it's not case so that he can find arrangements until then. You can also go outside, the garden of the mansion had been especially decorated for the occasion but I have to warn it might be cold, snow had even been announced for the middle of the night. Now everyone, let's the ball begins!"</p><p>***</p><p>
  <em>8.30 pm.</em>
</p><p>Ren pulled his collar once more and placed his cap back on his head. He made the most of the opportunity by surreptitiously shifting to the right, sticking a little more to the side of the president. The music, rousing and inviting when he arrived were now making him want to vomit. And the simple look of the dancers wheeling on the dance floor made him dizzy. It was louder. But he was sure that even a quieter tone wouldn't have settle well with right this moment.</p><p>The president shoulders slumped for the countless time tonight and he took a large step further on the right thus skipping away from Ren.</p><p>The president twisted on his footing, the mouth opened savagely and the risen matured fingers clutching and plucking at the air with clear repressed desires of violence. Ren grimaced internally but kept his positions.</p><p>After a long pregnant pause, Lory fell back on his stubs and shoot an irritated glare in direction of Ren.</p><p>"Dear godson, you know I love you, right?"</p><p>"You tell me every day since the birth of earth" Ren said, batting exaggeratingly his lashes.</p><p>The president groaned.</p><p>"Sorry" but as he said that, he still came closer again.</p><p>Lory swore some English insanity and Ren was suddenly glad most people couldn't understand English here.</p><p>"Now, now, president, no need to be rude"</p><p>His boss turned back to him, a self-explanatory look on his face as he gestured at Ren's behaviour.</p><p>"Would you please stop gluing me like some scared child!" demanded the president.</p><p>"But boss, look, it's working"</p><p>"What is?!"his boss exclaimed making twirl his numerous robes of Sultan around him.</p><p>"Repel potential dance partner from coming" said Ren with a matter-of-fact tone in the voice.</p><p>"What am I?  A bug repulsive?" grumbled incredulously the president.</p><p>Ren pinched his lips to avoid speaking the blatant truth and shifted his eyes' direction.</p><p>"Why don't you go dance with someone rather than being on my tail all the time when we are not even chatting?" His boss said.</p><p>"I already danced"</p><p>The president arched a brow.</p><p>"I danced with ten partners and out of them, seven stepped on my toes. I'm done for the night "grumbled Ren. "So, I apologize in advance he continued and suddenly looked intently at his life saver of the night, but I'm going to follow you around like a little dog the evening ends"</p><p>The face of the president was a mixed of shocked and horror combined when he answered: "Absolutely not, I'm going to throw you to the ladies. I plan to dance and you are breathing my air" stated the president without any pity and already strutting away.</p><p>Ren followed.</p><p>"You are going to dance? With a lady?! Asked Ren, that's new"</p><p>His boss glared at him.</p><p>"Yes, with a lady said the president, not with a dog" and he glanced at Ren.</p><p>"Rude"</p><p>"Plus I know from safe sources you are not against all women prodded the president, I'm sure you would dance with her"</p><p>"She isn't there" he said to his boss, shaking his head. And he was pretty sure she wouldn't come. It was an evening starting early and she still wasn't there and just two days ago, she was still saying she would do her best but wasn't sure. He shook his head again. No, he better not hope for it. Something must have come up and she wasn't able to attend.</p><p>He had even sent her a few texts at the beginning of it when he was still hoping she would come. He glanced at the place his phone was supposed to be settled in the inside of his so heavy calves-long costume coat. Not even the beginning of an answer. He would call her later but right now the only reason he was staying was for Maria.</p><p>He suddenly realized he was alone and frenetically searched for the president but he was only surrounded by feminine threats. One smile sweetly at him, asking if it would be imposing to ask for a dance and he resigned himself to his fate. Those women didn't do anything wrong, besides stepping on his toes of course. They just weren't the person he wanted to dance with.</p><p>He lifted his palm to the young damsel.</p><p>"May I?"</p><p>***</p><p>The over-the-knee flat slick boots rubbed on the carpet as she entered, and she staggered her foot-steps out of daze ecstatic trance. The decor was plushy and sumptuous. Everything gleamed with beauty and atmosphere and the garlands as unique lightening shaded a fairytale magical sparkle to absolutely anything Kyoko laid her eyes on.</p><p>Nose risen to not miss any details, she lost herself in this wonderment and stumbled around as she make progress, barely remembering how to walk and difficultly resisting the urge to stay right here twirling by herself. Once more she felt propelled in the infantine joy where only heartiness amazement laid. For the first time in years, she saluted the fairies flying and giggling by her side. She didn't of anything but feeling, rejoicing.</p><p>A late-arriving guest was the only thing that permitted her to remember herself in time and not tumbled in the ballroom not really there. The invitee outstripped her without even noticing she was standing close and she finally saw the bright light the compelling music was coming from. She had just stepped in this last corridor, the lane to reach the gathering room was some sort labyrinth land's pathway, and she was still 50 meters away. But she slowed down. She felt pressed by the desire to slow, to enjoy every step progressing, every detail. She lost herself again in the enchantment, Christmas much more appreciated by her after having taste some of the ways. Now, Christmas was not only love but family and magic for her. And the rare times she let herself fantasize unrealistically; Christmas was the one thing that could temporarily make her wish to have a family, children.</p><p> </p><p>Using her experience, when she reached the ballroom, she checked her mask and slithered inside as unnoticeable as an irrelevant outsider could be. Her eyes blinded by the sudden extravagant lights, she had to give it some time before she was able to go in search of Maria.</p><p>And true to her vision for once, no one really did pay her mind right away in her attire.</p><p>But if they did, they would have remarked some very important details. Fortunately they did not. And through and out the night, the only ones that would take notice of the person that just entered would be all too focused on the wrong thing to shed mask away. A reporter would later even note that there was more than one mask wore in this ball.</p><p> </p><p>***</p><p>Directing himself to the drinks, Koga passed by a late guest and stopped to admire the care taken to details; he was fond of old times and his outfit attracted his attention. It was interesting attire.</p><p>The waistcoat was all the way classical but it was the frock-coat reaching low on the calves of the man that was the more bold choice. Silver buttons going from head to waist at the left and fasteners purposely on right side tweaked things in front the usual centre attaches pick. It was nice. Counting the boots, all of that was black.</p><p>Then followed what he thought might be navy silk shirt, white modern bridge pants, that he was sure of it, and a light scarf to tie at the front. A dark felt Cordobes hat looking shamelessly of period, pale smooth gloves and a brown belt with a sword on the side completed the look.</p><p>He would have love to be able to see the man's mask and eyes but the dude turned to the opposite side before he could take a closer look.</p><p>He admired briefly his butt as the guy walked away, because, really, he had a nice one. He was intrigued. Maybe he would ask the guy for a dance tonight.</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0049"><h2>49. The Christmas ball  -part 2- Like a fairy tale</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.<br/>(I fully advise to listen to the songs I will have chosen when the dances start. I took the time to pick them and it will be a lot more fun. Of course, those aren't from me and some might be silly but for ambiance sake and for a masquerade, they are perfect. Thus the songs named in the story will be real songs. I won't put lyrics inside but I will put the full references for them at the bottom of the chapter. Believe me, it's worth it, I took a full day before writing the chapter to be sure I had all the songs and in the good order and for the right atmosphere)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Slaloming between the many guests, she was careful to keep a masculine gait as she walked over to the beverages table. Looking for Maria-chan, the only one she was going to reveal upfront it was her, she saw Ruto-san bring over a third wheel with numbers on it near a very suspicious pink one.</p><p>She was distracted of her mulling, however, when a familiar figure appeared at the entrance of the ballroom. Oh, she was well-disguised; there was no denying in that. But the dark and purple tones and the so typical cloth material brand of Jeanne d'Arc was pretty recognizable once you had seen it before. Thus, Kyoko knew instantly it was Maria-chan behind. Which was a shame because with her hair smoothed for the occasion, the heels and the elegant purple gaze falling from a black webbed corset to around her legs; most would never have recognized the young teenager.</p><p>She waited as Maria advanced on the smooth shiny reflective ground, Looking around and seeming to tense for a second before going straight to the buffet and her.</p><p>From the corner of her eyes she saw the tall and unmistakable figure of Ren, whatever his disguise, but it was only a glimpse before he was hidden by the crowd and seeing Maria coming close she focused her attention on her.</p><p>Maria-chan eventually reached her table and grabbed an orange juice with a shaking hand, swallowing it all at once.</p><p>She still looked smaller than most here but with her heels and outfit, you could have taken her for a very tiny young lady. She has really grown up a lot.</p><p>Crossing her right arm around her front, she inclined herself as the gentlemen and addressed the young lady with mischief and a rougher voice than her normal voice.</p><p>"This young lady seems rattled, could I indulge myself in hoping my company could lighten her up?" She said making Maria jumped at the sudden voice coming from her back.</p><p>Maria slowly pivoted on herself to look at her, smiling shakingly.</p><p>"H-hi"</p><p>Kyoko chuckled, took Maria-chan's left hand, kissed it making her blushed before resuming with her natural tone.</p><p>"It's a pleasure to meet you, milady"</p><p>Maria's eyes grew like saucers and grinning excitably, she exclaimed:</p><p>"One-</p><p>"Shhh, Kyoko stopped her before she unmasked both of them for everyone, it's a secret"</p><p>"How?  Why? You are a man? And what about your eyes? "</p><p>Her questions fused before she had a chance to answer and Kyoko laughed as she crouched inciting Maria to do the same.</p><p>"One question at a time she said," I decided to disguised as a man because I thought it could be fun, because your grandfather has allowed us to come as whichever gender we would prefer as long as we would keep the theme in mind and because if I'm to participate to a game, I don't to it halfway"</p><p>Maria grinned and giggled.</p><p>"It's a sneaky move, Onee-sama" she said.</p><p>"Right?" Kyoko grinned back.</p><p>"But Onee-sama", asked Maria frowning a bit, "where are your hair?"</p><p>"Under the wig"</p><p>"And…uhh…Onee-sama" started again Maria stammering big time, "where are your…uhh…your…"</p><p>Kyoko had to resist bursting out laughing when she whispered back.</p><p>"I bandaged them"               </p><p>"Ohhhh!!" sparkled Maria with comprehension. "So, they didn't disappear!"</p><p>Kyoko's gloved hand surged forward to tickle Maria's sides.</p><p>"Of course they didn't disappeared, little curious sprout!"</p><p>Maria laughed and begged for pity and she eventually retreat her hand.</p><p>Once Maria wasn't gasping from air anymore she turned to Kyoko again.</p><p>"Then, What about your eyes?"</p><p>"What about them?" Kyoko inquired.</p><p>"They are grey!" Exclaimed Maria like it was the most shocking thing of all she just discovered.</p><p>"Ah, right. Well, my eyes are paler than most so it's a too distinctive sign. So I had to hide them and wear lenses" she explained to Maria-chan.</p><p>"Your eyes aren't paler, they are golden countered Maria with a frown and how is anyone going to recognize you are even hiding your eyes, onee-sama?!"</p><p>"Isn't the point of this game exactly to not be recognized asked Kyoko, stating the obvious with amused arched brow.</p><p>"But what about Re-</p><p>The last of Maria's words were lost when sounds coming from the stage were heard when Lory took back the mic once more and everyone turned to him.</p><p>"Ladies and gentlemen, it is now a quarter before nine, the dance will start soon and it was brought to my attention of a few alterations you might want to know" started Lory.</p><p>"First of all explained the president, after some discussion, it had appeared only giving The-Wheel-of-Trap for the first being discovered and the second and first place winners could be a bit short, on quantity. As such, it has been decided, the first fifteen people to be unmasked would get a run of The-Wheel-of-Trap"</p><p>"Secondly, after recalculation, it transpired we had made a small mistake in the ending time of the game and adding the half-hour break we will take for Maria's cake and birthday part at eleven, there is quite  a certainty we will finish at one a.m rather than midnight. So, the question would be for you guests, if some people have obligations tomorrow and would rather opt for finishing the first part of the night as planned then we could finish around 12 still and the closing theme of the dance wouldn't be a part of the game and would become optional"</p><p>"But, if no one is eager to go to bed, we could keep things as they are and finish at one but taking into account the second part coming after, be warned it would you would leave before around 3 to 4 in the morning and fall into bed before 5 maybe" Lory said with a grin. "Now if everyone is sure he/she has the resistance, we can choose that option"</p><p>There were small chatter here and there before a voice shout to everyone to hear:</p><p>"It's a party president, if we are there to count time, why are we here?"</p><p>"Is everyone agree with this sentiment?" asked Lory in the mic.</p><p>There was a major <em>yes </em>coming from guest and the president chuckled happily.</p><p>"I was kind of hoping you would choose that. The ball will thus go as planned"</p><p>"Now, concerning dances organisation;</p><p>"You all received a number, your number, when you entered. It will serve in the game.</p><p>"There will be six themes. Introduction one, Discover one, Merry one, Winter one, Romantic one and Closing one. In each theme, there will be organized dances and free dancing. Each theme will be cut in two parts. The break between the two sections of one theme will be of 15 minutes and will serve as free dancing"</p><p>"There will be respectively, seven songs in Intro theme, four in Discover one, five in Merry one, six in Romantic one, eight in Winter one and seven in Closing one. The free dance breaks will happen most of the time in the middle of a theme but for the Discover theme where there won't be any"</p><p>"You only must participate in the organized dances, the free ones are to anyone desire. You can rest at that moment if you prefer but you have to participate to the organized ones, it's the game"</p><p>"There will also have complete breaks continued the president, without music. After the end of the Intro theme, ten minutes. After the third theme, ten minutes. After the fourth one, half an hour, it will be cake's time" joked the president. "After the fifth one, a fifteen minute break. It will be around midnight."</p><p>Lory asked if anyone had any question and had understood before giving the last bit of information so that the ball could begin.</p><p>"Your numbers will be put in the Wheel I didn't address yet tonight said Lory while gesturing to the white wheel on the left. The wheel will turn and gather two random numbers, the people with this two numbers will be partner for the first organized dance in intro theme. We will proceed like that for everyone and for the six songs of the introduction theme where everyone will dance with a different partner each time. I don't know if I already said it but I will repeat myself if that's the case. Anyone, absolutely anyone can be your partner so don't be surprise if you don't always dance with opposite gender. This evening isn't about compartmenting. You are wearing a mask tonight. You can be anyone. You can like or bend to any gender. This evening is an open place and the perfect opportunity to broaden minds and possibilities. Don't limit yourself and use this occasion to have as much fun and liberty as you wish for "</p><p>The president closed the subject, he didn't want to push it too much, just making bloom the idea of the possibility of something else being there if wanted. To anyone to grab it or not.</p><p>"After introduction theme, there will be one random partner assigned for the other themes. So one song with a new partner for the five other themes. For the other songs, the 3 best partners you danced with and got along with in Introduction theme will be reassigned to you for all the duration of the game with the option to choose your partner for <em>one song</em> for the long themes such the fourth, the fifth and the sixth theme" finished Lory while insisting on that fact and reminding everyone that the basics where normally stated on the invite for the ball but that if anyone felt lost, they could still consult the rules plastered here and there on the walls before it begins. It also advised to drink a lot tonight because the dances would take a toll on them if they didn't hydrate enough.</p><p>"Finally said the president with renewed mirth, don't forget the primary game is about unmasking as much people as you can and take time to write down names on the papers at disposal before the beginning or between dances when you will have uncovered more people. There are several boxes available in the room where you can slip the papers in with your name on it and the names of the people you think you discovered. I know the crates aren't that obviously visible in this gigantic ballroom but Ruto is going to switch the lighting for a few seconds so that you can see them clearly"</p><p>It was done quickly and everyone turned back toward the president.</p><p>"I think I said my part said the president, and even talked far too much already. We will start in, Lory checked his watch, six minutes. Go drink a bit. The white wheel has nearly finished pairing you up for the first four songs and you will be shortly given a card with the four first numbers of your partners. To avoid chaos, the people with an odd number will the one moving one from partners to partners while even people will stay put at the end of a song. The names of the songs that will be played will generally be announced before the beginning of a theme and a pre-song will be played to prepare people when it will start so that they have time to place themselves. That's it"</p><p>Lory left the stage with s flamboyant bow and the cards start to be given out while people gathered around buffet, making it far too crowded for Kyoko who told Maria they would talk later and went away from the other guests in her elegant manly though fake gait.</p><p>Still strutting away from the uproar, she stopped with a start when she saw the long silhouette leaning against a wall and looking all gloomy by himself. She internally laughed with how bad it looked with his glamorous shiny costume.</p><p>He was wearing a heavy and mighty dark calves-long coat falling on dark trousers, not really like hers, as his coat was even-longed on front as on the back and golden seams were following the brims of the coat uniform everywhere. It had also red and golden trims all the way on the sides of the sleeves and full-fledged giant embroidered wings on the wrists flanges of the coat. It has a few fake medals and silver tears shape gallions at the chest too. Completed with a black aviation casquet with again wings but silver this time; it looked like a full aviation force uniform.</p><p>And with his white shirt matching his white mask edging with again embroidered golden seam, he looked magnificent. It was blinding her a bit but she smiled as she noticed they had identically matched the shirt with the mask.</p><p>But it was why, with this sensuous shiny appearance, his expression looked especially insulting for the glamorous outfit.</p><p>Why was he hiding in shadows and playing loner so much at such an evening. What would people say if he was seen looking like that? Now, not that she didn't understand the desire for space… She just ran from the people two minutes ago. But the game was about to begin. Plus, it was Christmas's eve, what could upset him so much?</p><p>Okay. She was hypocrite. She had been depressed on a Christmas's eve. Several times in fact those last years. But it never lasted long because when the sun would rise and she would wake up that day, the surprise waiting would blow away any depressing feeling she could have had the day of before. Another reason she didn't stood a chance.</p><p>Anyway, it wasn't about her.</p><p>She slowly closed in and watched him as he rested his right shoulder on the brick wall. His face was barely visible, his body embed in the shading of the less lightened part of the ballroom. Still, of little she could see, what the shadows casting on his face were depicting weren't beaming and she felt like she had stolen from him something valuable she shouldn't have seen. A moment of intimacy with himself. Vulnerability.</p><p>His arms crossing and hugging his sides, he was holding himself like he was trying to keep the pieces together. His face was depicting such a conflict, such a void.</p><p>Seeing him like this… Her insides clenched and her lips trembled.</p><p>
  <em>What happened Ren?</em>
</p><p>No; he wasn't just upset. He looked deeply…Sad.</p><p>It was unbearable. Her heart ached weirdly.</p><p>She took a step toward him.</p><p>It was dangerous. He couldn't show that here. Even if it was a merry party, the sharks might not be far. In fact, she was sure there were at least several journalists. She couldn't let them see him like that.</p><p>Not that it was her first upmost concern at the moment, she mostly just urged to comfort him one way or another.</p><p>Kyoko wasn't even hesitating anymore about blowing her cover and screwing the game to the damn when she advanced, straight to him, but the song alerting them to take place started and she saw him struggling to bring back his metaphorical mask in place and smile as he received his card and went in direction of the dance floor. She had missed her chance.</p><p>She bite her tongue out of frustration as she reluctantly also made her way to the floor, she couldn't just ask him what was wrong now that he was in front of his partner. He didn't know it was her and though she had no doubt he would recognize her would she talk with her normal tone, maybe the game would distract his mind from whatever was tormenting him. Maybe he would even have a good time and if she just went and asked him, she could make things worse and rub on something he didn't want to talk about rather than help.</p><p>That was not an option.</p><p>Then, maybe she could foul around during breaks and try to cheer him up some. She would have resolve to only that until she would have learned about more. There was no way she'd let her adorable fairy in that state.</p><p>***</p><p> </p><p>She stepped into place in front of her first partner, not really caring who it was but trying to not worry too much for the moment and tempting to play the game still.</p><p>The seven songs of the theme were announced in the background and her partner, a young woman rose her hands with a light blush. Without forgetting to go lower with her voice, she greeted her and took her hands in her gloved ones, the first dance being a waltz. <em>Arrival to Edgewater </em>began and they started to dance. It was not too fast and a good start for the ball, Kyoko could tell. The girl was a bit clumsy but not that bad.</p><p>Soon, the song was coming to an end and a bubbly man mostly fell into her arms with pumping energy. She instantly recognized him at his tone and the way he greeted her, though he said dude, because of course, he thought she was a man.</p><p>"Good evening Kijima-san" she said as the song <em>Royal meeting</em> started and she had to contain a giggle as she heard the first measures. It was a pretty rhythmic music, alternating a lot in pace. Absolutely perfect for the man in front of her.</p><p>She presented her elbow to Kijima and he crossed it with his. They started to swing. Rotating from one, changing of elbow, rotating in the other way. Fast, slow, fast. And again.</p><p>"How did you know?" he whispered in a hush to her.</p><p>Her eyes twinkled.</p><p>"It was an easy tell" she said.</p><p>He looked at her, squinting the eyes a bit.</p><p>He suddenly clamped his elbow tighter around hers and gasped loudly.</p><p>They turned and turned from the same side for a time as a slow measure arrived and Kijima rushed out a soft exclamation in an expulsion of air.</p><p>"You are not a dude" he said, matter of fact.</p><p>"Nice call" she answered, not denying it, it was the game after all but keeping her voice low pitch so he wouldn't guess which girl she was. She doubt he would recognize her anyway as her voice had changed from the past and he hadn't hear or talk to her a lot since she was back but you could never tell.</p><p>He snickered at her, clearly amazed but also amused.</p><p>"That's such an unfair move for everyone" he said.</p><p>"How so? The president said it, didn't he? You could come as anyone. Any appearance, any gender. High class. Low class. All was okay as long as you respected the theme" Kyoko countered.</p><p>"I doubt a lot of people dared it" Kijima frowned.</p><p>"Their choices, not a rule" she shrugged, shaking her head internally when she realized she was cursed with an habit picked up years ago.</p><p>
  <em>Damn man.</em>
</p><p>"Rude. But fair enough" Kijima admitted.</p><p>They rotated again, accelerating once more which roused laughed all around as people danced.</p><p>"I suppose you won't give me your name? tempted Kijima with charming smile.</p><p>"Not a chance" she grinned at him.</p><p>"I'm going to bet on you" he said as they were reaching the end of the song.</p><p>"Go ahead. But I can't promise you I will win. I'm sure other people had had amazing ideas themselves" she warned him.</p><p>"By the way she asked, what gave me away?"</p><p>Kijima chuckled.</p><p>"Bitter by the reveal?"</p><p>She smiled.</p><p>"Maybe a little bit. But mostly just curious"</p><p>"Your elbows mostly. When I'm crossing mines with yours, they are feeling way thinner than a man usually has them at the place, though I would admit you are more muscular than the majority and you almost fooled me" he stated, shooting her an approving grin. "But once I had a doubt, and considering this dance permit us to see each other profile frequently, I checked your neck in search of your Adam's apple"</p><p>"I guess it's to be expected" said Kyoko, in deep thought on how to conceal it already.</p><p>Kijima snorted as he saw her already changing her posture so that it wouldn't be as easy to see her neck. He could she was an actress, so adaptive already. He then looked at her boots when he realized the top of her head was reaching pretty high, only to note she wasn't wearing that much heels.</p><p>"You are tall he said, I don't think it will be that easy for others to discover you"</p><p>"It might be true, yes" she agreed as she turned once more.</p><p>"Plus I only noticed because I'm so used to have women in my arms" he told her with a wicked grin.</p><p>She rolled her eyes at him.</p><p>"What a playboy"</p><p>"Might be true" he said, copying her last comment. "Well, you will have to excuse me, <em>milady </em>he whispered that term, "but I think our time is coming to an end. I will try my best to unveil you all night" said Kijima before leaving for his next partner, the words full of innuendos making turn several heads as he had said that phrase very loud.</p><p>The following song <em>Masquerade ball, </em>how appropriate, was the first very classical waltz and when it started, her next partner, a girl grabbed her hands with a bit too much force. This dance promised to be challenging for Kyoko. Not because, the song was bad. It was alright. But the constant stepping on her toes made things a bit harder. And then there had been the occasional molesting of her buttocks by the girl who just had no shame driving her hands lower and feeling her up a bit too forcefully. To which Kyoko hadn't really responded well and while bringing back her hand in an appropriate place, she had tightened her hand a bit too much around the weak wrist of the girl.</p><p>But the most tiring thing was most definitively when, seeing she couldn't do as she pleased anymore, the girl had spent the remaining of the song crushing Kyoko's fingers in her hands so tightly that Kyoko's seams gloves had begun to hurt her hands as those pushed between her fingers. At the end of the dance, she was ready to throw away nearly as far the gloves than the girl.</p><p>Still, there was still one dance before the first free-dancing break so Kyoko resolved to endure it a bit longer.</p><p>She made the girl turn one last time sending her to her in seek of her new partner and the song ended.</p><p>Taking deep breaths, she was doing her best in not getting impatient and <em>not </em>letting the occasional walks on her already abused feet get to her nerves but it was quickly stretching short.</p><p>She looked around and watched guests matching up for the next dance but still no sign of a partner. She was willing to propose to pass on that one and flee the floor but a shadow laboriously closing up as it tried to pass through other dancers and a quickly clearing path was eventually seen meaning her chance to take a break and massage her poor hands and feet were vanishing faster than a shooting star.</p><p>She sighed internally and rubbed her gloved hands before placarding a pleasant smile on her face.</p><p>The last dancers joined their partners and the approaching silhouette nothing but blurred shadows until the precedent second made his appearance and the distance itself became invisible as the ceiling's garlands casted a small glowing light on his features.</p><p>Her breath stopped, stuck inside her throat and her lips slightly parted and he came in front of her not even batting an eye at his presumed male partner, of course.</p><p>"It's a pleasure to meet you" he politely said and lent his hand to her implicitly proposing to lead.</p><p>"Likewise" she replied adopting an even rougher tone than for others. She was incapable to say if it was only her act or something else making her does it instinctively.</p><p>She took his hand.</p><p>Time, place, people, appearances, like trillions of glasses 'splinters, they all fell around them. Useless. Unnecessary walls and sounds. Sole remain the warm of engulfing hand and his shoulder under her own palms. His eyes looking at her unknowingly, the sadness not far, the mask not as solid it was in the past and his growing awkwardness at her intensity.</p><p>She smiled innocently and closed her lids escaping the mirrors of her soul her eyes must have shown for an instant.</p><p>They began to dance to the slow waltz as <em>The Royal Masquerade </em>made its first measures.</p><p>She watched him grimace at the sweet music and couldn't restrain herself this time.</p><p>"Is the music not to your taste?" she asked as they twirled.</p><p>His lips inched upward at her question but the smile didn't reach higher. She had to try harder.</p><p>"The song is pretty" he replied with a shake of his head.</p><p>"Oh? So it's the company the untasteful part she commented, duly noted and understandable"</p><p>"You are a good dancer" commented Ren politely.</p><p>"Maybe" she admitted," but I'm far from the usual league straight men would tap in. I lacked some interesting and quite essential attributes" she stated vaguely gesturing at her bandage body and playing her male act to the brink.</p><p>A small chuckle escaped him and a little life and interest came back into his eyes.</p><p>"No fault can be given for something that can't be help he said. Plus, a lady is not always the most suitable option, especially on an evening like this" he admitted. "They can be wilder than I would ever expect it he whispered on the tone of the confidence.</p><p>"That I can agree on" she said looking pitifully at her feet.</p><p>"RIP to our feet" he said with all the serious in the world.</p><p>"And buttocks" she added.</p><p>"And I was hoping to be the only one to benefit of this privilege thus permitting to forget those dreadful experiences in the void of my mind" said Ren.</p><p>"I'm really sorry for ruining your dreams" she said, pinching her lips.</p><p>"Considering it's only the beginning of the night, I hope this gentleman is prepared" he said.</p><p>She shook her head.</p><p>"Unfortunately not. You are?" she asked.</p><p>"My first experience in this matter is far away" he explained.</p><p>She paled just by his half-bitter-half-bemused expression.</p><p>"How far?" she asked.</p><p>"Early teenage years and be warry it isn't always the lady on that peculiar matter" he said and Kyoko was surprised he would admit something like that even if they were comrades of pain at the moment. She was sure he would never have told her that if he had known it was her. She also felt thoroughfully shocked to learn he had experienced this when he was mostly a child.</p><p>"I feel blessed it's my first experience in this" she said, shaking her head in persistent disbelief.</p><p>He snorted.</p><p>"You are but pay no mind. I'm used to it"</p><p>How were you getting use to that, she wasn't sure she wanted to know and she felt personally offended at the perpetual abused committed on his charming backside.</p><p>He chuckled some more at her shocked expression, a softer look forming on his face. Then he looked at her in a confidence manner.</p><p>"Back to subject; you might need help before the end of the evening and I'm might be able to provide it" he said.</p><p>She arched a brow in question but realizing he couldn't see it she voiced it.</p><p>"Oh?"</p><p>"I possess a very good ointment for this sort of urgency. I must have at least two tubes in my bag" said Ren.</p><p>"No, really?" she inquired.</p><p>"I'm willing to share" he told her.</p><p>She grinned at him widely and he stared at her weirdly for a second.</p><p>"Now, we are talking business"</p><p>They hold it in but only for a few more seconds.</p><p>And exploded in irrepressible cackles. And in the heck of their laughing, Kyoko unconsciously came closer as she held herself to him.</p><p>"But in all seriousness she managed as they slowly got their wits back," I would be really grateful if you were willing to share" Kyoko told him as she thoughtfully rubbed her backside.</p><p>"Sure thing" Ren said with another snort and a good inspiration to completely calm himself as he stood rightly back, "I will bring it to you at one of the breaks" That's the exact moment he noticed their proximity and while it wasn't bothering him, something else caught his attention and unknowingly to the retreating man waving at Ren, eyes bored into his back all the while.</p><p>Something was fishy with this man, he could have swear he smelt feminine perfume on the guy.</p><p>Shutting down his instinct, he shrugged. He wasn't to tell what perfume to wear to someone or what to not wear because it was generally used by women. It wasn't an unpleasant scent anyway.</p><p>He went for a drink before going to fetch the ointments in his shoulder-bag. He didn't have much time before the reprise.</p><p>He sighed.</p><p>And she wasn't there.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Who is going to get a long hilarious chapter, it's all of you. I really hope you will love this one. I had a fun time making it. Don't blame the craziness on me.</p><p>For the songs of the first theme, here are the complete references:<br/>-Arrival to Edgewater-Desire&amp;Decorum.<br/>-Royal Meeting-Desire&amp;Decorum<br/>-Masquerade ball, beautiful Waltz<br/>-The Royal Masquerade-The Masquerade.<br/>You can find them all on Youtube.	<br/>I wish you a happy reading and lot of laughs. Lot of kisses</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0050"><h2>50. The Christmas ball 	Part 3	 - like a fairy tale-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.<br/>The songs in the chapter are also at the bottom for references purpose. I still fully advise to listen to them while reading this.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She headed to the buffet as calmly as her nerves allowed, the steps if not masculine this time, at least as effaced and light as it was possible for her to make it. She reached the table and sank her already hurting fingers into the cloth covering the furniture, pressing and pressing against the wood behind.</p><p>Peeling her gloves off with a huff of annoyance, she took the time to calm her frazzle being down.</p><p>It was upsetting at this level.</p><p>She didn't expect it to be this way. It was far more nerve-wracking she thought it would be. She was worried about him. And yet, the all experience had seemed so out of the world. It had only been one dance. One dance and she felt ridiculously happy.</p><p>
  <em>One fucking dance…</em>
</p><p>She cursed aloud and took some non-alcohol drink.</p><p>Needing the space, she took off in direction of the balcony passing by Maria chatting with her grandfather and Kyoko felt sorry her disguise didn't hold longer against the president. During her stay with her, Maria had clearly told her she wanted to be more independent from her grandfather. And while Kyoko could understand the worries of her boss, she could also understand the independence you can desire at this age.</p><p>Still, as long as he would let her have fun, it shouldn't a problem. He didn't seem to be bothering her in the way Maria had spoken of at the moment but he was clearly teasing her. And that's at that moment that she noticed a boy, most likely the same age as Maria trying to break in and approach Maria while this one completely aware of him, yet focused on her grandfather was doing her best in looking angry and pushing Lory away making this last one's smile stretch to unknowing highs every few seconds.</p><p>Kyoko rolled her eyes and turned in that direction, hoping to change his focus but the second his eyes noticed she was coming, he grinned like the Cheshire cat and chills ran down her back.</p><p>She passed Kanae, she could instantly tell it was her with the regular "Moh" coming out when she was outraged or just not happy with a situation. In this case, the all game was apparently not to her tastes. She briefly admired her modern and gorgeous lavender dress, for once praising the president to have had the idea of mixing modern outfits and old ones in attires obligation of the night and she happily noticed she was with Hiou, at least she guessed. The young man by her friend's side was by far taller than in the past and didn't seem like a boy anymore. Rather he had even all of a young man.</p><p>But the fake non-expressive uncaring-hands-in-the-pockets-attitude was still recognizable though subtler than in the past. It was replaced by crossed arms, leaning nonchalantly against a wall and the same pretending non-feeling face.</p><p>But it was very funny to watch because every now and then his neutral expression would break when Kanae would do something interesting or unconsciously close the distance between them. Kyoko wondered if they were in better terms or if Hiou had just convinced her to talk to him for the evening. But he was still acting out and trying every tricks to be able to touch her, apparently.</p><p>Kyoko chuckled to herself thinking she might have to have a chat with him right this night and proceed toward Maria.</p><p>She was barely at hearing distance of her targets that the president whispered his greeting with his typical smirk spelling her name in the most natural way and making his granddaughter violently elbowed him at his side until he coughed in pain.</p><p>"Maria, that's harsh" he complained. "It hurts, stop bullying me. Do you not love anymore?" he asked with a pitiful expression but Kyoko could see the glim in his pupils as he glanced toward her from the corner of his eye.</p><p>She didn't say a word to her president, just looked at him pointedly until he smiled nearly apological but not quite. Maria grumbled and ignored her grandfather before sweetly telling Kyoko she would go speak to her friends now and that they could speak later.</p><p>She agreed and turned back to the president just to see him grin and before retreating with an enigmatic "nice work", a wave of the hand and evil chuckling.</p><p>She saw him heading to the stage but didn't pay him more attention, decided to catch a breather away from the crowd even if now she didn't have time to go outside anymore.</p><p>***</p><p>Lory stepped on the stairs leading to the dais grinning at his own thoughts. He reached the white wheel as it started the task to get out the new partners for the next three dances. Little balls with numbers on it fell by two regularly and before being picked up by assistants and soon the fifth dance had all the future partners found. The rounds of the wheel for the sixth one was next and Lory dismissed the staff rushing in frenzy in attempt to get the following balls ready while still scribing for the precedent turn and told them he would do that while they'd finish taking note for the partners of the precedent tour.</p><p>He meticulously put all the glittering red and golden balls back into the Wheel and started on the only mechanic wheel of the stage. As set of two balls began to fall in the little crate, Lory picked them up repeatedly as often as needed to lay them in the little boxes provided for this purpose until one number popped out.</p><p>Biting back a smile at the number 10 plastered on the golden ball assigned to his favourite former love me girl, he twiddled his backside, making it sound like he was slightly uncomfortable in his standing until he was leaning against the wheel. Then hidden from view he halted the rotation by the force of his right arm twisted behind his back thus preventing the following ball to come. Then as innocent as a sheep he dropped in the crate the shiny red ball with a 25 number drawn he had taken from the assistants just a minute prior.</p><p>Only then did he stepped away and as he saw the staff coming back, he nonchalantly bent to retrieve the two balls then tucking them in their own little box as he had done for all the others before.</p><p>He smiled at the staff and told them there should be about a third still into this round before starting the seventh song picking.</p><p>The assistants bowed to him repeatedly, apologizing for making him help them but he brushed it away he stepped down and went in search of some nice cocktail.</p><p>Later on, his sturdy fingers full of rings tonight would clang excitably against the thin glass of the aromatized beverage so much his hands couldn't stay put with excitement.</p><p>He didn't really like to cheat but fate needed the little push with this two idiots and he would rather welcome a cheating's accusation than one of non-action. Plus, he was renowned for his matchmaker nosiness so he needed to at least do honour to his name on such a romantic night.</p><p>He chucked in his drink.</p><p>The night was only beginning.</p><p>***</p><p>The second part of the intro began and <em>Belonging,</em> the fifth song, came and passed without Kyoko really noticing. It was a slow song that's all she could say. That and she had danced with an adorable Momose and regretted a lot not being able to tell her who she was all the time the song lasted. Momose-san had grandly evolved and she was even more beautiful than Kyoko remembered but she had kept her sweetness and kind demeanour. She had just sounded a tad slyer than in the past but Kyoko guessed it was to be expected.</p><p>She was glad she hadn't been discovered. Momose had been such an agreeable company after all the precedent dancers, except one of course. She had just grabbed Kyoko bared hands in her own gloved ones and they had danced and chatted happily even with Kyoko under cover.</p><p>She was very happy hazard had given her Momose-san as partner and she could finally enjoy herself.</p><p>That's why she switched partner naturally at the next dance, <em>The succession,</em> and completely unguarded, twirled happily to place the tips of her fingers against her new partner owns ones not aware in the lest.</p><p>But the barest smallest touch sufficed in making climb her awareness ten folds.</p><p>She didn't even have to look up to know who it was.</p><p>Therefore, she didn't.</p><p>The tune, lovely and merrily rhythmic enticed them in swinging twirls where one arm raised; they only touched each other with the top of their fingers. And Kyoko, smiling brightly like she was merely enjoying herself but feeling the weight of one singular gaze, focused really heavily on the steps and music until half way through the song.</p><p>The full surface of her partner's palm made contact with her own then and her eyes reflexively rose to meet higher the pensive look he was giving her.</p><p>"Hi again" he said with a question in the voice she couldn't name.</p><p>"Hi" she answered, trying to distract her nervousness by keeping track of the steps of this high rhythm.</p><p>He didn't say more. But for some brief seconds his stare twirled nearly as much as they did on the dance floor between wonders she couldn't decipher and confidence; until it settled quite easily onto the latter. The acuteness in his eyes soared in a blink and his all demeanour changed.</p><p>His shoulders fell and his all body loosened up and the hand against hers became subtler yet warmer and so much more present. His heavy presence took all the air and she felt sucked in. Suddenly he felt alighted from the inside out and Kyoko wondered if the scene of distress she had witnessed just a few moments when he was alone was a pure hallucination produced by her imaginative mind.</p><p>The odd intensity he was staring at her with and the new softness she thought she could distinct finally got reason of her will power and she tried to avert her gaze. But for some obscure reason, that had absolutely nothing to do with the care he took in the touch of his hand against hers, she didn't manage to.</p><p>Kyoko felt so silly. She knew he didn't know yet she couldn't help to see messages where there weren't. The filter of her emotions was all over the place she knew but she couldn't help it.</p><p>She felt sucked by the look of his stare. Rooted by the fierce look like he wanted to rob her of all her secrets and embraced them in a warm comfy blanket.</p><p>All of sudden he grabbed her by the waist and lifted her at the last crescendo of the song grinning widely and making chuckled a few people around them. It ended without more emphases after that but it happened as such a shock for Kyoko, she had to blink the intensity of the moment several times before being able to move.</p><p>She eventually withdrew her hand but large firm fingers closed back on a few of hers to stop her move and she looked up again.</p><p>"I'm glad you could make it" he told her with a soft happy voice shocking her with this reveal.</p><p>She wanted to retort, say something but she didn't get the time before the final song begin and her partner switched again.</p><p> ***</p><p>From the second the tips of fingers touch his he had no more doubt about the feminine gender facing him but fresh ones about the identity of his partner. From the moment his palm made full contact with hers, he knew.</p><p>He had held her hand in the past and even more recently. He had even worshipped the moments that were graced to him where he had been able to touch those soft hands. So he knew. In an instant he knew.</p><p>The joy of seeing her overcome everything for a while then came amazement. Her attire was the extreme opposite of bashful. Not by the costume itself but the extends of where she went to disguised herself were so outright and well-done; would he have not danced with her, he would not have guessed it. No, even after the first dance he was still fooled. It was the contact of her bared hand that granted him clarity. She even went as far as putting lenses to hide her golden eyes and taking a bit larger clothes to dissimulate her curves.</p><p>He shook his head as he saw her elegant endearing profile leave the dance floor for the first true break at the end of the next song and went for the chase. This night wouldn't be so bad after all.</p><p>He reached her at the other end of the room, catching her grumbling to herself and cheerily greeted her making her jump at the sound.</p><p>And curse.</p><p>He loved that. She wouldn't have done it in the past. She sounded so much freer now. Nearly unattainable in her free spirit.</p><p>"Sorry for scaring you" he said.</p><p>"What gave me away?" she asked leaning against a pillar with a small smile.</p><p>"Your hands"</p><p>She looked at them then back at him, not getting it. And very slowly Ren grasped her long fingers in his, barely keeping them in his hold. He then lightly brushed his thumb on the delicate lines defining the back of her hand, the joints and the smooth skin.</p><p>"It's feminine hands. You managed to dissimulate your other feminine features but this was evident the moment I touched them" he explained twisting the truth a bit. "Once I knew you were a woman, I could only think of one woman capable of such a disguise"</p><p>A light hue appeared at the compliment but she didn't say anything and the skin against his palm started to feel hotter and hotter.</p><p>He looked back at her and she raised her hand in the air but stopped short near head, the impulsion to run her hand in her hair evident but the risk of making drop the wig was there and he relaxed his fingers, letting go her palm.</p><p>She leaned back, seeming embarrassed but still not talking.</p><p>"I wish you wouldn't have hidden your eyes too though" Ren added after a while without really thinking.</p><p>She arched a brow.</p><p>"Why is that?"</p><p>He hesitated only for a second before stating the truth.</p><p>"This beautiful golden colour is too enchanting to be hidden" he lowly said.</p><p>She breathed in and turned her head to the side.</p><p>"You are terrible" she mumbled and kept her gaze away from him frustrating Ren to no end.</p><p>
  <em>Look toward me</em>
</p><p>"I was afraid you wouldn't be able to come" he said at last, letting a tint of the sorrow he had felt be heard in his tone.</p><p>She turned back to him and offered him a weak smile.</p><p>"I wasn't sure I would be able to" she said softly, "sorry for not being able to warn you"</p><p>He shook his head, understanding and the silence stretched as he stared at her. He didn't care if she was man or anything, he would be content as long as she was there. An irrepressible smile took hold of his lips and she squirmed under his gaze.</p><p>"Stop it already" She said with a chuckle he wished was out of nervousness.</p><p>"You are acting like it's your birthday, Christmas and Anouchka all together" she said with a snort. "You looked pretty gloomy earlier, what is this sudden happiness bubble?"</p><p> His heart raced. She had noticed that. Him.</p><p>He leaned on instinct and her eyes grew like tennis balls when he brushed her cheek with his lips.</p><p>She twisted herself to look at him, mouth opened and bewildered.</p><p>"Thank you" he said, his voice soft.</p><p>"For what?" She breathed.</p><p>"Noticing. Worrying"</p><p>She rolled her eyes.</p><p>"It's normal and it was kind of hard to ignore" she told him with a concerned look. "You good?"</p><p>So simple. Just bare open worry. Just like that and he felt his heart lurching forward.</p><p>"I'm okay now" he said." But if you keep being so worried, you are going to get a hug" he warned in a very serious voice yet the teasing clear on the face. She needed to be less sweet or he was going to lose it.</p><p>She crossed her arms and grinned at him.</p><p>"Is Mr fairy getting cocky because he knows I know and I'm more used to foreign customs?" she teased shouting back her own smirk at him.</p><p>"Maybe" he chuckled, hiding the effect of again something new from her.</p><p>"But she started, worry making its way back on her face, "If I can help and if it would prevent any more misery for the evening then-…she inquired.</p><p>He blinked at her, not believing his luck before jumping at the occasion.</p><p>"Definitively" he agreed right away.</p><p>"Then-</p><p>She hadn't finished her phrase neither raising her arms he was practically falling into her and she just had the time to clamp her arms around him.</p><p>She chuckled against his ear but kept the hug going before noticing he wasn't respiring anymore.</p><p>"You are breathing?" she asked before rubbing his back soothingly making him choked a bit or so it seemed.</p><p>"Good?"</p><p>He hummed in response and very lightly tightened his hold on her.</p><p>Kyoko thought he must really have needed the hug for him to leap into it so enthusiastically and concentrated to keep herself calm and collected and just help him. If he had some bad times, she wanted to be there for him.</p><p>
  <em>You'll deal with that later.</em>
</p><p>She was trying to keep her mind on random things, to ignore his enthralling scent floating all around her, filling her lungs and making twist her insides and want to rub herself against him. To not pay mind to her pumping and aching heart.</p><p>To ignore the soft fabric against her hand hiding the firm delicious muscles waving or tautening at times, the heat he was emitting or even her desires to kiss his throat, jaw and to feel him up everywhere. And on her way in taking her mind off all that, a thought came and she snorted.</p><p>"What?" he mumbled against her ear sending a chill down her back and making throb an intimate part of her in a place it really shouldn't happen.</p><p>"I was just thinking that people were going to think you are gay she told him while starting to step away"</p><p>He let out a short laugh and accepted to let go.</p><p>"I really don't care" he replied with shrugging shoulders and she eyed the move with mitigated irritation.</p><p>"Stop doing that she grumbled, I'm getting your bad habits and I've started to do the same"</p><p>He widely grinned, pleased beyond reason by that knowledge and she shook her head again.</p><p>"Why are so damn content with this?" asked more herself than him but still speaking loud enough he would catch it.</p><p>He shrugged again. Completely on purpose.</p><p>"Just because"</p><p>Her face ticked under the sight of his boyish grin but she decided he would win if she let him see her annoyance.</p><p>"Where did you forget your gloves by the way?" he asked and Kyoko glanced at her bared hands crossed on her arms before eying him.</p><p>"At the buffet I guess, it's the only I was before the second part started" she answered. "But why do you ask?"</p><p>"If you want to keep the charade on, maybe you should put them back" he commented.</p><p>"Why bother? You already guessed who I was and Kijima also knows I'm a girl" It wasn't she didn't want to participate to the game of the night but if two people already found her out and easily with that, she didn't think it would make such a difference anymore.</p><p>"But he didn't get the girl was you, right?" asked Ren.</p><p>"You are the only one who managed it just on damn hands, magical senses weirdo" she mumbled. It suits him after all. Only a fairy could have such sharp senses.</p><p><em>I would always recognize you </em>Thought Ren.</p><p>"Some sharper eyes might see you are a woman but I don't think there is risk they get it's you under. I, myself wouldn't have get it before a few more dances had you not remove your gloves and even then it was because I touched you in the past" he said. "I already know you and I'm pretty observer but you would fool a stranger each time"</p><p>Kyoko chucked.</p><p>"You don't have to reassure me, you know"</p><p>He tilted the head.</p><p>"You don't mind being discovered" It wasn't said as a question but more as a confirmation. She replied anyway.</p><p>"Nope"</p><p>You don't want to try to win the game?" inquired Ren.</p><p>She snorted and shook her head.</p><p>"The only reasons I went that far in the disguise was for fun's sake and to get back at you for tricking me into participating" she stated placing her hands on her waist with a little puff of air.</p><p>"I'm sorry, I kind of-</p><p>"I know she cut him, you did for Maria-chan I bet. I'm not angry. But you did still tricked me and that only deserved pay back"</p><p>He looked at her, his lips locked in a constricted weird seal, the expression weird.</p><p>"So, since I found you out-" he began.</p><p>"No point in hiding anymore" she nodded.</p><p>He hummed in reflexion and rubbed his neck.</p><p>"What about-…keeping the tale on?" he proposed. "And still doing our maximum to not be discovered?"</p><p>Kyoko arched a brow before retorting mockingly.</p><p>"Because it's even a possibility for you"</p><p>"Maybe not he admitted, but you can"</p><p>In front of the new frown marring her face he thought fast about a valid reason and told her:</p><p>"It's the game after all, I don't think Lory would be please with us not trying"</p><p>"And failing from the start or not even trying" she finished for him, darkening at the prospect of putting back her gloves.</p><p>"I did put a mask" he protested.</p><p>She snorted.</p><p>"As if it makes any difference. You height is selling you out even meters away from everyone else"</p><p>He conceded defeat and changed subject as the headed to the drinks table. She looked bothered a lot by it and he couldn't figure out why.</p><p>"Does it annoy you that much to keep going? Isn't it at least a bit fun?" Ren questioned her.</p><p>She negated the thought with her head before explaining.</p><p>"Playing the game isn't the problem. And dancing can be fun" she agreed though she had to admit she was soon going to be tired of the numerous of people presents. "It's the murder of my hands that bothers me" she said with a pitiful look at her hands. Dancing without them was far easier. People just paid more attention and the seams weren't sinking in her skin.</p><p>He chuckled softly.</p><p>"Well, I still have a tube of ointment to give you" he comment innocently and she groaned in embarrassment.</p><p>Rubbing the part of her face not covered by the golden and blue mask, she hid away to not see his grinning face.</p><p>"Please, just consider this discussion concerning this and that never happened" she nearly begged with another hand raised in front of him so he wouldn't see her face.</p><p>Ren pinched his lips.</p><p>"It would be hard to forget you admitted some partners molested you" he said, half-amused-half-growling.</p><p>An adorable new racing blush came to her face and he felt really happy to see he could still make her blush like that or the she was still not that immune to some things.</p><p>"Please!"</p><p>He sniggered even more.</p><p>"Never!" he settled before erupting in more laughs.</p><p>And between hiccups, he lifted a shaking hand to her where laid the ointment.</p><p>She snatched it with dignified huff and walked away.</p><p>Chuckling, he fast-walked-trotted after her and taking advantage of something he could do in public here only thanks to the dim lights of the garlands, he gave her a new peck on the cheek as a peace offering.</p><p> "Are you planning to make it an habit?" she inquired in all her worthy stance but slightly amused.</p><p>"If you'd let me" he replied.</p><p>
  <em>Oh what I wouldn't do if you would let me…</em>
</p><p>But he couldn't tell her that.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>For the songs: Belonging-The Elementalists. The succession-The royal masquerade.</p><p>Kisses. Enjoy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0051"><h2>51. The Christmas ball 	Part 4	-like a fairytale-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.<br/>I still highly recommend to listen to the songs I selected for all of you while reading this. It really is a plus in this part of the story as the masquerade does is a lot about music. I really wanted to give the most perfect ambiance for the ball. Honestly if had been able to make the music I would have done it.( I can do lyrics but it's not the same) And yes I admit I'm a music addict, lol.<br/> The references are still at the bottom.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The break came to an end and soon they were going back to the dance floor for the following songs. Some were perky, others were quieter but while Kyoko, now reassured Ren wasn't in that bad of a state, enjoyed herself, Ren was displeased. Or rather, more than a little frustrated. No, people hadn't uncovered Kyoko after she had put back her gloves though he was pretty sure some had also their doubts on her gender.</p><p>But it didn't change quantity of people were dancing with her and he could see she was enjoying herself. And he was happy. Watching her smile or dance freely was a great joy to see for him. And it should have stopped there. But no, he couldn't help but feel possessive over her, greedy and he didn't even have the right to. But after even more days without sight of her, he couldn't help wanting to monopolize her. He knew the instant people would know who she was under, he wouldn't get much more chance to have alone time with her. And he wasn't talking about the ball right now. But about all of her. She had just came back, she wasn't famous yet in Japan but she would soon be and things would get even more complicated to spend time together.</p><p>He didn't want to miss that chance. He had waited far too long already. He didn't know how he would do it but he was hell-bended in not letting go. Of course he knew he just couldn't drop his feelings right there right then at her feet, the time for that had slipped by his fingers but it didn't mean he was going to behave like before. Now was different. He couldn't do that but in a way he was freer of his moves than he ever had been with her. She was far less guarded in front of him. Now, he could casually touch her without having her freaking out. She was still taking it as teasing but she didn't back away. She was even teasing back sometimes!</p><p>He was going to take advantage of those new liberties he had. He was going to do his upmost in getting closer.</p><p>But for now, he needed to keep his temper in check. He shouldn't be jealous to see her dance with Momose, Kotonami-san and even Kijima. He knew it was irrational to want to hog her to him as the theme progressed and they danced through second and third ones.</p><p>Not like knowing it was pointless helped him in any way but it managed to keep him distracted until he was able to shove back those ridiculous feelings to the back and appreciate to its full value her joy at she danced.</p><p>But as soon as the third theme ended and the second real break began, it didn't prevent him to be on her trail immediately.</p><p>It didn't come as a surprise when he found her just a minute later and asked:</p><p>"More fun?"</p><p>She turned to him with a big smile and he had to remember how to breath.</p><p>He didn't need to know that each time she had been groped it had brought back awful memories and put her on guards or that she had been immensely grateful to dance with more partners she already knew than unknown ones in the themes that just passed.</p><p>"Absolutely. Less groping and more agreeable company"</p><p>"I'm glad to hear that, you might not have much use in the ointment" he teased.</p><p>She drew her tongue at him to hide her embarrassment and his eyes darkened, thinking about much more depraved things he would wish to do with this. She looked so much more spirited than in the past. No, it wasn't that. She had always been spirited. But she was less bashful, less tamed; freer.</p><p>She would never have pulled her tongue at him before neither would she have hugged him. Even less let him kissed her on cheek as a casual thing.</p><p>And that evolution for him was hotter that anything he could have imagined. She had changed so much. She was still changing but the confident woman he had in front of him was already blinding him at every moment she looked at him.</p><p>But the weapons she now possessed over him were threatening to drive him to the walls. And she didn't even realize she was doing it. As always. He smiled. He guessed this would be something that wouldn't change too.</p><p>Darting his eyes away from the tempting sexy pink appendage slipping back in her mouth, he took a deep breath, trying to suppress his desires to twirl that little rosy tip with his own tongue, to suck on it, to tease it; to let it do whatever it would want on his body.</p><p>Holding back a new groan at the direction of his thoughts he noticed she was talking and grabbed at his sanity.</p><p>"…about you?" she asked.</p><p>"Hmm? He did, what about me?"</p><p>She smiled.</p><p>"Was this time more okay?"</p><p>In front of his lost look, she specified.</p><p>"The dancing"</p><p>"oh. Yes, it was okay"</p><p>He hadn't had any more groping though a few people still walked on his feet but he didn't really pay it more than a little thought. It wasn't with her.</p><p>She arched a brow.</p><p>"It doesn't sound really convincing"</p><p>He smiled softly at her concern but didn't answer back.</p><p>"I saw you had Momose-san and Kijima several times for partners" he said.</p><p>She nodded.</p><p>"They are good dancers. It makes it more pleasant"</p><p>He eyed her.</p><p>"Are you saying it's not my case?" he prodded.</p><p>She glanced at him with amusement.</p><p>"You know that's not the case, Ren" She chuckled. "If you are hoping I will fall for the same jokes and teasing you were giving me in the past, you are up for a surprise" she typed.</p><p>His heart jumped at this and he had to keep the hyped shudders he was feeling out of his voice.</p><p>"My apologizes milady" Ren scrambled out hiding with brio his new jittery. "I might need an update on how to tease you properly nowadays"</p><p>She glared at him.</p><p>"You could also skip that part altogether" she deadpanned.</p><p>Ren grinned and countered.</p><p>"But what would be the fun in that?"</p><p>"Yes, what indeed? " she sombrely commented.</p><p>He bite back a new grin and wait until she would turn back again toward him.</p><p>When she did, he raised a brow in false stern silence and it only took her a second before a wide smile made its way high on her cheeks.</p><p>He replied to this with his own soft gaze.</p><p>"Fine. I know it's impossible to stop for you. You are just being you" she said with a shook of the head.</p><p>She checked the time on the giant pendulum in the corner to see when they would need to go back and he stared at her, amazed at her new incisive but feeling always higher thrilled by this new her. Alighted with peaceful yet vivid life.</p><p>The time came and they led themselves to the dance floor once more. The romantic theme began with <em>Christmas Canon rock</em> and Kyoko merrily spin with her partner, Kanae, highly amused by the fact she didn't recognize her the all-time they danced even if they had already danced once in the precedent section.</p><p>When the second dance came, <em>bittersweet-desire&amp;decorum, </em>Kyoko had the surprise to discover Koga as her new partner and she warily took his hand. But she was in for a huge surprise when he suddenly started to hit on her even while thinking she was still a dude. She also had to suppress countless little giggles to escape her at every turn as the gentleman complimented her in all sort of ways.</p><p>He was especially fond of her allure and butt and Kyoko was divided between feeling bashfully embarrassed and laughing at the absurdness of it all.</p><p>He kept the babbles on for all the duration of their turn together and even proposed her some less innocent offers. Which ended up making her a little bit shocked and it's in that state they changed partners again.</p><p>The song <em>Valentine's Waltz</em> broke in and she began to twirl then gasped softly when she came back to earth to see in whose hands she had hers and with whom she was dancing. Again.</p><p>He smiled at her, the eyes softs and inviting as his brawny hands guided her in the new whirls of this low-pace waltz. The slow motions meant to entrance any ear that would hear, any dance that would occur. They didn't utter any form of speech for a while and their gazes anchored to the other appeared to do the all the talking.</p><p>He wanted to talk. He wanted to joke about what he heard Koga told her. But he couldn't. The light pressure at his shoulder. The soft pads of the strong but delicate fingers in his hands. This inebriating rhythm.</p><p>Those warm eyes set on him for his upmost pleasure.</p><p>He felt like he wasn't moving. He didn't have a body anymore. He felt so light.  His sole anchor her eyes.</p><p>He was blind. Only her could make him fall or rise. Because he was flying.</p><p>He was flying.</p><p>Everything was a blur beside this woman in his arms.</p><p>…</p><p>She gazed at him. She needed to escape. She didn't want to.</p><p>Her feet were moving. She knew they were. She knew but she couldn't she feel them. She felt numb. Pressure against her hand. Hard muscles under the other. Stringent scorching arch around her waist. Those were her security net. The ones preventing her to fall, to disintegrate into thin air. They were as much what could make her disappear as what was preventing her to.</p><p>Eyes that intoxicated her at each instant she gazed into them. Pumping heart. She felt alighted. Pulsing with the world that was him.</p><p>She felt bashful, she was tingling everywhere. But she couldn't tear her eyes away.</p><p>In the infinite of the present, time seemed to distort and stretch on this perfect second where there were no self-loath, no questions, no doubts; just two people. A man and a woman dancing together.</p><p>And oh, heavens know how powerful It can be; <em>when a man and a woman dance together.</em></p><p>At this instant,</p><p>She felt family. She felt Home.</p><p>There is nothing she could have wish for, more than this moment of stolen eternity.</p><p>Everything melted in a blur besides the man holding her in his arms.</p><p>                      </p><p>The dance ended without either of them caring and they fell straight into the next one not even taking note of the fact they had been chosen to be partners again or that there wasn't a break as planned normally.</p><p><em>All I want for Christmas is you </em>made its first measures as they swirled again.</p><p>It was a much faster rhythm and not even a waltz anymore but they were too entranced with the other to be disturbed by that. Their steps just accelerated to match it and they smiled and laughed at some tempo of the song, not caring, not seeing anything but them. In their world bubble composed and lightened only by them.</p><p>When the song arrived to its end, it came as a clash of their time that had seemed to be without an end and the reality.</p><p>The last notes echoed and it's with regret and a sudden sadness Kyoko stepped back when one of her former partners was assigned to her number for her next dance.</p><p>She stretched her lips in a mild smile toward Ren and let go of his hand before turning around as smoothly as she could.</p><p>But from the first step she took away her left hand was firmly grabbed back and engulfed at the last second, his rough fingers grazing on purpose the heart of her palm as the grave voice of him asked her.</p><p>"Stay"</p><p>She turned her head around perplexed before pointing with the chin the setting of the game already happening.</p><p>"But the-"</p><p>"We are allowed to choose one partner by section from now on" he recalled her.</p><p>He pushed no more.</p><p>Just tilted his head, his eyes begging her and her feet as animated with a life of their own stood back in front of his own ones.</p><p>She nodded and received such a breath-robbing heavenly smile of his for it she did not care if she was breaking rules or not after that. She let her hands be held again.</p><p>The song launched as the measures of <em>Lair of Luxury </em>were heard.</p><p>She wouldn't have trade her place for anything. Here, dancing with Ren. Even if he didn't know that. Yet, the moment the tune began she started to sweat. She couldn't pinpoint what was wrong. The song was beautiful. The tempo slightly more picked up than a waltz. But not quite. It was slow yet catchy. Smooth. It had a slow beating time to time. Pon-pon clac. Pon-pon clac. It was alternating between parts of violin and piano. Then again. Pon-pon clac. Pon-pon clac. There was also a little bit of guitar at moments.</p><p>Danger.</p><p>She noticed. Because the song wasn't as safe game as the others. It was having a deep impact on the atmosphere of all the dancers. It had been instantaneous. The moment the notes were echoing in the ballroom, the mood changed.</p><p>Pon-pon clac.</p><p>Her breath huffed out heavier and heavier as the song progressed.</p><p>Pon-pon clac.</p><p>She didn't want to run.</p><p> But as she lost herself in the consuming eyes facing her she knew she should. It wasn't a tune that would easily let her hide what she felt.</p><p>Pon-pon clac.</p><p>She didn't know how or why but she was under the impression his lids were now half-closed as he looked at her. She was surely dreaming it. But his eyes blazed such a furnace in the dim lights it was making her heady with supressed urges. Her stomach coiled. It was like all the garlands were reflecting in his eyes and if she looked keenly she could even have a glimpse of the forest green under the brown of the lenses.</p><p>Pon-pon clac.</p><p>The sensation was torrid. Her mouth parched and she gulped. Humidity drenching between her legs.</p><p>The scorching of the sudden warm taking hold of her nerves were too much for her system and she could feel her crimson inflamed face and the moist liquid drops of sweat skidding down the hollow of her back under the cloth violently clamped by the gigantic hand upon it; though it came unnoticed by her.</p><p>Pon-pon clac.</p><p>Air weighed all around them clouding their senses, their touches. Barely able to let go of their own breath once in a while, they danced and danced. To this slow torturing beating rhythm. Not noticing the rapprochement of their bodies. Not noticing their fingers threading, the hands crushing each other with so much restraint from both sides. Not seeing they were walking on thin ice at just a hair of breaking loose. A hair of lips touching.</p><p> </p><p>And then the song ended. Spell broken.</p><p>And they both took a shaking breath as they took a step back and let go of the other hand.</p><p>Ren chuckled warily before rumbling out in a sandpaper voice far rougher than usual:</p><p>"I think I can affirm with great certitude who is the person who chose the songs"</p><p>She faintly laughed back in return, trying to sound composed but not really there yet. Her hands shook a bit and she put them behind her back. It was one of the most unnerving experience. She still had goose bumps going on and her breath was far to be back to even. Her back was going from chill to too warm on repeat.</p><p>Starved, she couldn't help herself for a second and hungrily eyed down Ren from the corner of the eye letting her desires came at the front of her thoughts. Running up every muscles back and front, kissing, biting, teasing every spot of skin. She wanted to be the one able to grab his glorious sexy butt's cheeks. And not some molester. She wanted to taste those full sinful lips she knew to be soft. She wanted to glide her fingers in his smooth hair. She wanted to be the one to make him groan and sigh. More than anything she wanted to feel <em>his </em>hands on her body.</p><p>She did her best to chew back on a sudden upcoming whine before grasping back at her control discreetly and quickly hiding what she was feeling under a placid mask. Thanks to him, she had really improved in hiding her emotions compared to back and then.</p><p> </p><p>Last song of the theme started and she didn't even had the time to wonder if she was supposed to go somewhere else that Ren had once more took hold of her hand.</p><p>
  <em>Again?...Wait…I need a break…Too much fairy dose in one slot…</em>
</p><p>"Wait. We can't. We need to switch" she protested but Ren's eyes shined and he pulled her back to him soundly.</p><p>"You can, you didn't choose a partner yet"</p><p>"But-"</p><p>"Kyoko", he interrupted clearly showing no concession on this even though his eyes melt to an endearing gleam,</p><p>"Dance with me"</p><p>The rough murmur, completely unfair in her opinion, still got reason of her and shoulders slacking, she admitted defeat.</p><p>And at start of the next song, <em>It must have been the mistletoe,</em> they both groaned, not because the song was bad mind you, and she replied to his previous statement with a slightly amused-slightly grumbling tone.</p><p>"You're absolutely right. There is only person that could have chosen all those songs"</p><p>He chuckled and nodded.</p><p>"I thought you would agree with my opinion on that matter" he humbly said with a little bow of the head, highly entertained.</p><p>And for the remaining of the romantic song, they happily swirled in the tad lighter atmosphere. Though the weight of the precedent song and the person with whom they were twirling prevented them to relax in its entirety, this one had not much less power.</p><p>It just attacked at another angle.</p><p>It was such a sweet tune. Bubbly yet slow. Poetic. And it didn't take long for it to inspire melancholic feelings in both of them. Because more than just a song, it was a story. A very cute tale about the first Christmas of two lovers. A tale about a chance, an hazard in the form of mistletoe. One kiss to know they were in love.</p><p>Just a little tale. An innocent Christmas song.</p><p>But for the desperate hearts of two people dancing tonight it made them wish for so much more than a dance than an ephemeral moment than a kiss. It made them wish. Wish they weren't just dancing, just there in the same room. Wish they would be together. It made them wish they were celebrating their first Christmas together.</p><p>That for a mere second, the moment happening was so much more than it was. And the dream was the reality, the reality the illusion.</p><p>And that one kiss would have been able to grant a wish. To seal destiny.</p><p> </p><p>They wished. And their longings rose and their hearts ached as they did.</p><p>They wished for it with all their hearts as they chatted and whirled to this lovely song. Because it was Christmas and for just one second, they wanted to believe.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Songs: <br/>1.Christmas canon rock by Tran Siberian orchestra<br/>2.Desire&amp;Decorum:Bittersweet<br/>3.All I want for Christmas is you, Maria Carey.<br/>4.Valentine's Waltz by Derek Fiechter and Brandon Fiechter<br/>5.Lair of Luxury-Nightbound.<br/>6. It must have been the mistletoe Barbara Streasand(One of my favourite song of all times, I highly recommend it)</p><p>I wish you all well. Reviews are food. Feed me. Kisses.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0052"><h2>52. The Christmas ball Part 5 - like a fairy tale-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p><p>WARNING: Fluff and risk of rotten teeth ahead, proceed with prudence.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The more consequent interlude was finally there and people dissipated from the dance floor in flood of mixed feelings of relief for the timeout and shocked disappointment they couldn't continue. Some were apparently come prepared and trained for a very long dancing night and didn't even want to grab a breather in-between.</p><p>Still, most dissipated with giddy talking about the dances and partners they had met before fluttering to the buffet in wait of the eminent cake.</p><p>Yes, to Maria greatest disappointment she had been discovered by a lot of people thus the lack of need to wait for the end of the game to serve her birthday cake.</p><p>The cake came pretty much as soon as all people had left the floor, the timer for the game still on making the need to press things a little more but to Kyoko it happened as in idling motion. She took Maria aside and as discreetly as possible gave her the present, a beautiful dark nighty dress from the teenage side of Jeanne-d'Arc brand she had bought and twisted a little for her because she just didn't find it acceptable to wait for later for her.</p><p>But just after it she realized time had passed and it was already hazy in her mind. All of the people were passing near her, they were laughing, eating the cake but it was all a blur of colours glazing in front of her eyes.</p><p>The sounds quenched in her ears as if they were coming from afar.</p><p>Her mind showing images in her head on repeat made her unable to focus on the present. She was lost on the tiny precious previous moments of her in his arms. She felt wobbly and floating.</p><p>She suddenly felt like sitting down and heavily supported herself against a wall, unaware she was still breathing laboriously or that at another corner of the ballroom, someone somewhere wasn't really in a better state.</p><p>…</p><p>Conscious he had to congrats Maria but just barely, Ren pressed his hands into the sill of the restroom washbowl and his fingers gripped the edge with tension.</p><p>
  <em>What the hell was that?!</em>
</p><p>How was he supposed to keep his cool after something like that? The way he had felt, the warm, her touches against him.  He was agonizing in his own desires.</p><p>His mind raving, putting every touches, every situation, every moment in perspective. Reliving them again and again, imagining each time it would have go further, he would have done something, said something. Yet incapable to find any default in the perfection those dances had been. To find something to critic would be like blaspheming those, corrupting them. Even if his heart longed for more. He laughed inwardly. He wasn't making any sense. First he wanted more. Then he was worshipping the moments.</p><p>He put his forehead on the sink's mirror and his loaded breath clouded it instantly. He didn't thought it could be that hard. That straining for his heart.</p><p>He removed his mask temporarily and splashed water on his face with a groan. What was it that made it so different? Why was he so turned on?</p><p>It wasn't the first time he was spending time with her damn it! The painting day had been rationally more racy.</p><p>Then why? Why?</p><p>Intense shining eyes swirled as they danced back in his foggy mind.</p><p>Her eyes. It was her eyes.</p><p>Though the gold had been hidden behind lenses, her eyes had blazed all night and right through him as they danced. There had been no shame, no shyness, and no annoyance in them. Only joy. Warm.</p><p>He even dared to say they had looked tender as they had stared into his.</p><p>Again. Again. This new assumed affection and boldness.</p><p>That's what got him.</p><p>She didn't shy away from showing affection. She didn't keep him at arm-length as in the past. She didn't hesitate to be in his company. She didn't freak out at his touch. No more.</p><p>She didn't hesitate to affirm her opinion, her time in the States had apparently permitted her to affirm herself.</p><p>This confidence. This new charm and standing she expressed in her acts and opinions.</p><p>Intoxicating.</p><p>Each new veil he removed as he learned to discover who she now was made him crave her more.</p><p>He found he was able to let himself be by much further extends. He would tease her and she would take it in strides, teasing him back on something else but she would notice it. She didn't balk. She wasn't shocked. She was laughing with him, snorting at his silliness. But not pushing him back.</p><p>She still didn't catch it was flirting but he supposed it couldn't be helped.</p><p>But.</p><p>No outrage. No distance. No disgust.</p><p>Just, laughing. Laughing together. And this new exhilarating proximity.</p><p>He splashed more water on his face before laughing aloud. He was losing his shit there.</p><p>He felt completely inebriated with this new reality. Drunken by the excitement he was feeling.</p><p>
  <em>Get a grip</em>
</p><p>And later as he made his way back and delivered his gift to Maria he idly wondered if one could die from too much flutters of the heart or too much quivers running down a body.</p><p>But since he was already drunk he fully intended to make the most of it.</p><p>The pendulum soon rang half past eleven and Ren smiled as he made his way back to the dance floor. There was one hand he wouldn't let go.</p><p>At least for tonight.</p><p>The two first songs of winter theme, <em>winter ball dance </em>and <em>first winter</em>, came and passed in a fuzzy as he abided for his time. <em>Twilight Serenade </em>started and having moved closer to her in the twirls of dancers he was able to notice the dreamy eyes she sported as the song hummed its melody. <em>Straight to la-la-land </em>he thought with a fond smile.</p><p>But to his surprise when the next song came by, <em>Dream of fireflies, </em>a catchy song spoking of a mix between a Christmas song and a rock one, her eyes turned even more glazy and he was surprised when her partner that kind of seemed like Hiou-kun at the time knew the song too and led her into a rhythmic kind of wild rock-style dance as the other dancers tried to acclimate themselves to this new sort of song. They still did so pretty quickly and sprout of laughs fused as they rocked on this freer song.</p><p>He laughed to himself. Since when did she liked rock? And Christmas one even. His curiosity kept growing as time passed and she showed more sides of herself.</p><p>The midterm of the theme came and he looked for her promptly but she was not found and he pawed at the ground while waiting for the second part to begin.</p><p>When it did, he had the pleasure to discover her random partner assigned was him this time. He notified one of Lory assistant he would choose her as his partner for the next and told her so as he eagerly took hold of her hands.</p><p>She shook her head at him but warmly smiled.</p><p><em>I had A Memory </em>began and Kyoko let go of his hands and shouted her head to the back in laughs. It was another Christmas-rock song. Ren looked at her blinded and also a bit perplexed at this new choice.</p><p>"I'm wondering if the boss used lottery to choose the songs of this ball" he commented with an amused frown.</p><p>She giggled in return and it was such a soft tune to his ears.</p><p>"You are right" she said. "It's fun though and far from a bad taste song"</p><p>He nodded before asking.</p><p>"But how should we dance with so much change of rhythms in the song?"</p><p>"We alternate?" she proposed and he agreed.</p><p>"Take my hand" and she advanced her palm toward him.</p><p>He didn't have to be told twice. He caught the precious offer in his hands and they waltz until the end of the slow part then moved on with the dancing when it switched to a more hyped tempo.</p><p>They laughed halfway through it because it had just become too fast for them to find a dancing pattern and with most other dancers beside a few they managed awkwardly through it.</p><p><em>Frosty promenade </em>followed and though it was still not really slow, the rhythm was definitively suited for a waltz. Though a cheeky bubbly one. It kind of inspired little bells and snowflakes so it was perfect.</p><p>They crossed or rather weaved the wrists together,  arms in the air in a similar fashion they did during their first dance but this time only their wrists were touching and not the fingers. They swirled on the tune just like that alternating sides, cheeks burning for too much smiling, teeth showing as they smiled widely. Not feeling any tiredness. Giddy as much from the song as for the person they were dancing with. Absorbed in each other. Eyes sparkling.</p><p>At some point, the song eventually ended and Kyoko discreetly asked for her chosen partner of this theme to be him before coming back. And just like that he felt such a surge of happiness. He felt so special she was willing to continue to dance with him he wanted to shout. He pinched his lips instead.</p><p>There were only two songs left before the end of the body of the themes. Would only remain the closuring theme after that.</p><p>He didn't want it to end for though. He wanted to prolong it as much as it would be granted to him.</p><p>The following song, <em>Old City Bar,</em> began and he had no more time to dwell on it. He decided to satisfy himself with the present. It was a slow poetic soothing Christmas song and it was perfect. He learned Kyoko knew that one too and saw her dangling her head from sides to sides as they waltzed in a slow round.</p><p>She started to apologize when she saw he was observing her but he shook his head silently gazing at her some more and himself tilting his head to the rhythm of the song. She blushed lightly before losing herself again to the music.</p><p>His heart swelled as he looked at her and he closed his lids wanting to engrave this moment in his memory.</p><p>This instant of joyful eternity with her. He had never felt so at peace before.</p><p>…</p><p>But then it came to an end and the partners switch for <em>Cherry orchard Breeze, </em>the last song.</p><p>Soon enough the theme finished and Lory informed everyone they would now take the break promised though they decided to change it for a little bit longer considering everyone looked like they would enjoy a fair pause. Thus it was decided to be more around thirty minutes of interlude before the closing began. In the mean time, the guests were finally allowed to give presents if they had one. But the president still asked them to keep a part of those if they had more than one or to refrain if they could until the second part of the night if they only had one. He told them he firmly believed waiting would be more fun.</p><p>He didn't make any remark on the fact some people had given a fair share of their presents brought for Maria in the precedent break but he was pouting.</p><p> </p><p>Tacking between people she hastily retreated from the centre of the room feeling completely out of breath. She swept the walls as she progressed away from the crowd, her feet a little tired and hurting by now though she was beaten yet. She eventually reached the less lightened area of the ballroom and receded through the shadows with an expulsed relaxing breath of air.</p><p>It was then her eyes glazed over the scenery taking place just the beyond the glass windows walls and doors. Her hand rose in reflex to graze the transparent glass and her eyes reflected the white magic as they gleamed with glee and delight.</p><p>She soundly pushed the handle and rushed outside silently. She needed to go there.</p><p>Her boots clattered on the long pavement path still mostly cleared that led to several benches near the end and a patio. She carefully took the softly lighted path to not slip but was soon distracted and lifted the nose in the air to bask in the glory of snow as she grasped the full view of thousands of iced fluffy crystal-coloured flakes falling and wafting down.</p><p>Barely holding her laughs of allegress, she twirled around dancing alongside the snow-fairies out there giggling near her and walked in the soon crunchy-soft white ground the snow was slowly making it to be. Flakes fell all around her and on her and it was frizzing but she didn't care and only stopped whirling when she caught sight of a bench beside her and decided to sit down.</p><p>Then she sighed blissfully. This had been an eventful evening and she was glad she was able to expulse a bit of the tense energy out here. She hadn't planned she would dance so many times with Ren. In fact, she hadn't thought she would even dance at all with him. Still, no matter how much her heart was squeezing at the moment, she couldn't bring herself to regret it. It had been a wonderful ball for her thanks to him.</p><p>She closed her eyes and let little flakes of snow fall on her lids as she tried to regain and capture the recent events of the night so that she would never forget about them. Her precious seconds of eternity.</p><p>She was distracted from her thoughts when she felt cold water running down her neck and realized the snow on her head was melting down.</p><p>She briefly thought about it. Then decided she didn't care and removed the drenched wig and cap. She hadn't been here to win anyway. Just to have fun.</p><p>Her long light hair dropped in cascade in her back and on her shoulders and the flakes started to fall on her true locks instead but at least her head wasn't cold or humid anymore. And she wasn't soiling the wig either.</p><p> </p><p>She lounged there on the bench under the spots lights letting albescent snow fall upon her and she breathed in the frosty air of the night.</p><p>Faintly her ears caught sound of the clock striking midnight but it was weak from where she sat and she was so lost in her own mind she didn't pay much attention to it.</p><p>…</p><p>Ren was looking for Kyoko but he had lost sight of her when she went for her next partner earlier and wasn't able to find her after that.</p><p>The pendulum stroke midnight as he was roaming the crowd with his eyes once more but he thought with a start that he might not have searched at the right place.</p><p>It was still only a gut feeling and very presumptuous from him but he had got the feeling she was less fond of people than in the past. Or maybe it would more corrected he had got the feeling several times she now largely preferred to be alone or just a few people nowadays. She didn't tell him of course. But she was doing a lot all on her own and  even through the sparse calls they had managed these last years before her return he had noticed she was often alone or with one or two friends. Very rarely more.</p><p>He could be wrong, it was all guessing after all those years passed without seeing her.</p><p>But of he was right-</p><p>He found her. It seemed he still didn't suck too much at understanding her.</p><p>There. Outside on a bench, her very own hair flowing in the wind and covered in snow. Like some ethereal vision in the soft lights. A magical apparition glowing thanks to her long now familiar golden hair.</p><p>It was mesmerizing.</p><p> His feet raced by themselves as he handled his package and slipped through the gap of the opened glass door before stalking to her in a daze, his lashes fluttering away the flakes falling.</p><p>He made it to her soon enough but seeing she didn't notice him as she had the lids closed he took his time observing her face.</p><p>"What are you doing here, sitting like angel in the snow?" he eventually asked her.</p><p>She jumped so high she fell off the bench and some curses followed.</p><p>"Damn it Ren. Don't sneak up on me like that!" she said.</p><p>He chuckled at her grumbles and apologized as he helped her up.</p><p>She shouted him an half-glare and they both sat back on the bench as Kyoko explained she had just wanted some fresh air after all the dancing.</p><p>He nodded. It's true it was rather uplifting after the warm of the ballroom and the exercise they just performed. He turned toward her.</p><p>"Kyoko?" he called to catch her attention and she who was looking at the sky full of flakes falling shifted to look at him.</p><p>"Hmm?"</p><p>"Happy birthday" he softly told her with a broad grin before bringing out what he was hiding behind his back since he approached.</p><p>She groaned audibly.</p><p>"I had almost forgot"</p><p>"I wouldn't have let you"</p><p>She eyed his lap where laid the presents he had just brought out from behind him. Yes with a "s", there were several. She didn't even how he had managed to hide it from her sight when he came near her.</p><p>She pinched the corner of her bottom lip, resisting very hard to not glare at him.</p><p>"Rennnn…Why are there several gifts?"</p><p>"There are only two" he corrected with an amused tone.</p><p>This time she did shoot him an unimpressed look.</p><p>"It was the bare minimum" he stated shamelessly. "One for your birthday and one for Christmas" explained Ren. "I already hold back a damn lot. So don't you dare say anything or I'll buy you the triple next year" and he answered her nonplussed look from just before with a stubborn one of his.</p><p>She parted the lips at a loss of words and just gaped raising feebly one hand at him in explanatory before letting it drop with a moaning sigh.</p><p>"What about the roses?" she blurted out after a while.</p><p>"I thought it would be an explanation in itself" he said with a confused frown. "Why don't you think of it as a tradition from now on?"</p><p>She wanted to strangle him and even lifted the hands in direction of his neck out of sheer frustration.</p><p>She smiled a grimace at him.</p><p>"You are really-…she started. "And yes, don't you dare think I forgot you sent me roses every year since I left, you crazy man! And each time more madly gorgeous!" She grumbled as his grin stretched and stretched infuriately higher.</p><p>"Why is it a surprise?" He said with false shocked eyes and the most smug smile he has ever sported and Kyoko squinted her eyes at that. He was so happy it had left an impression on her. He raised his right index in front of her and flakes soon started to fall on it as he started to count.</p><p>"First year, the one of your seventeen birthday, one rose. Second year for your eighteen one, two" He pulled out a second finger at that and follow the same pattern then. "Third year, three roses. Fourth one, four roses. For the fifth year and your twenty-one birthday, 5 roses. Six roses for your twenty-two birthday"</p><p>"And finally he said as he stretched the last finger of his counting on his left hand and slowly approached the vibrant scarlet bouquet to her, "Seven roses for your twenty-three birthday"</p><p>He was impossible.</p><p>"Isn't it the least?" he questioned portraying such an innocent look Kyoko didn't know if it was false or genuine though she suspected the latter.</p><p>"You are serious, aren't you?" she asked.</p><p>"Deadly so" and he pushed the regal giant flowers even closer to her.</p><p>She slowly lifted her hand and delicately took the heavy bouquet, her wrist tilting a bit before she tightens her grip.</p><p>She gazed at the claret jewel-like petals moved more than she would ever admit and unable to not melt at the sight. They were so lovely and there were even little Christmas leaves added among them for the occasion and also serving as the tie for the beautiful royal blue and gold wrapping.</p><p>He had never forgotten. Each year since she left, on the morning of the birthday she would receive a bouquet of roses delivered by a postman with a card.</p><p>She brushed one of the dense glorious petals feeling the thickness yet softness of it under the pads of her fingers.</p><p>"What sort of man sends a bouquet through the globe just for a birthday and each year at that?" she mumbled with a tone edging the fondness she felt in spite of her former thwart.</p><p>He just smiled at her. Wishing that beyond all probabilities and his good sense, his intentions would get across.</p><p>"How could I have not?" Ren mumbled at last too low for her to catch it "Be glad I didn't send you more than roses all those years"</p><p>Kyoko looked at him, appalled with the prospect and he chuckled.</p><p>"Isn't that what the friends are here for?"</p><p>Her eyes turned cold and outraged.</p><p>"I'm not here for presents, Corn!"</p><p>Damn. He had managed to really angry her. Still, he couldn't help the amusement creeping up.</p><p>"I know" he got out from the tip of his lips, the voice horsed all of sudden.</p><p>She eyed him, suspicious in his sincerity and he smiled some more.</p><p>A grin crept on her face in an instinctive reaction and she breathed the sweet smell. She didn't stood a chance against his divine smile.</p><p>"Fine fine, they are sweet" she said after a few second had ticked by and he wasn't caving.</p><p>He beamed and she groaned at the brightness.</p><p>"Would you accept the presents, now?" he asked and thought he appeared to keep his cool, Kyoko could his excitement in his eyes.</p><p>Way to play dirty.</p><p>Held in by tender amusement, she crooked one corner of her lips. He was so cute.</p><p>She nodded numbly, all spirit of scolding him vanished.</p><p>He grinned and took in his big hand the little rectangle packet wrapped in an elegant night blue paper and dropped it in her lap.</p><p>She stared at it then at him and again for a few times making snicker Ren.</p><p>Without more hesitation she delicately pulled at the fins of the wrapper on the sides and extracted a box composed of black velour fabric for the bottom and the top lid a smooth class matte silver with inscribed in golden letters <em>Swarrfayri, </em>the brand apparently. A little trail of deep imprinted blue weaved under it like a tread of silk and at the right corner could be found a little fairy inscribed in the same mat gold than the brand.</p><p>Accustomed to see details, she easily found a stamp stating it was a personalized boxing requested by the client.</p><p>She wondered why he went as far as personalize the box but didn't dare to comment on it when she saw his grin and clearly entertained face. He just knew she had noticed she bet.</p><p>She lifted the lid and when she saw inside stupefied her for a second.</p><p>Bedding inside was a pendant of round form, thin though not small. It was maybe three and an half centimetres in diameter. Maybe like a coin of half a dollar in the States. She didn't really know in what material it was made, she could just tell the colour was between white and silver. Again, it was matte.</p><p>But it was something else that grabbed her attention. On the smooth surface of the front, drawn or engraved she couldn't decipher, laid an infinity sign. Then on each side of the pendant dangled a little figurine. Little trinkets in the form of a fairy at the left that looked very much like Corn as it was holding a little blue stone and has green stone eyes and hair in a lighter tone than the silver of the body. And at the right of the pendant a white cat.</p><p>"I requested that the cat be added after I met Snow" explained Ren when Kyoko didn't say anything.</p><p>She delicately pulled out the chain from its case and took hold of the round pendant a little thicker and heavier she imagined. But just by a little.</p><p>"Turn it over "Prompted Ren when she kept staring at it in a daze.</p><p>She did so and gasped at the sight of the angel engraved in the centre of the little medal. It was middle-size one that didn't reach the edges of this side by at least one centimetre. But it was just a detail she noticed at the time. What she was really focused on was the pure white wings falling behind the feminine blue-transparent silhouette that sported amber hair and eyes.</p><p>"Is that me?" She inquired, not really believing it but not seeing any other possibility.</p><p>He chuckled at her hesitation.</p><p>"Who else?"</p><p>"Though I must admit I didn't plan your hair would have grown up so much so it's still in the pixy look you had in the past"</p><p>She blushed as he kind of just compared her to a pixy.</p><p>"Why do I have wings?"</p><p>"Open it" said Ren softly in answer.</p><p>She gently turned it around in search of an opening until she eventually found a little disparity gape going on on all the right side of the pendant between the two pieces of metal.</p><p>"You don' have to be so cautious, it's solid" Ren said as Kyoko was still barely touching the opening like she would break it at simple touch. "And it doesn't oxide so you can also put it into water or at least you don't have to remove it if you know you will be in contact with some" he stated after she had finally put her nail into the little gap.</p><p>The pendant spread open and this time air refused to make it to her lungs and her throat clamped on itself.</p><p>Inside, laying on the reverse of the front, a landscape was drawn. But not any landscape, a coloured one. With green, blue, reflects. Bushes could be seen. Water falling. Sun casting shadows.</p><p>It was a clearing. Their clearing. With the little cascade, the rocks; everything.</p><p>She didn't know something like that was possible. It looked like paint but she knew it wasn't and it was so much more clearer. Like the angel at the back, nearly translucent and yet all very sharp and identifiable.</p><p>Her eyes started to sting and her hands shook at she brushed the material which composed the wonderful landscape of her childhood memories.</p><p>But the reverse of the back was what finished her.</p><p>As letters written in a neat handwriting could be read on it and told this message: <em>For you. My Best-friend, My angel. K.R.C.</em></p><p>She hiccupped a sob and bent over through her emotion. How? Why? He couldn't say that. It was like-…like she was special. How could she reason herself with those words there?</p><p>
  <em>It's unfair. It hurts so much…It's so unfair Ren. </em>
</p><p>He called her his angel. Why? She didn't deserve that. She was far from it. He was crazy.</p><p>And what? His best-friend?</p><p>She didn't want that.</p><p>She wanted so much more. She wanted everything.</p><p>And yet,</p><p>Beyond common sense, all she felt at the moment was overflowing affection. Joy.</p><p>He had put so much care and thoughts into it. So much details. So much everything.</p><p>"It isn't bought like that, is it?" She mumbled after a long while in her knees when Ren started to worry and apologized if he had vexed her so she had to repeat her question a few times until he replied.</p><p>"No, it isn't. It was a personal design I asked the jeweller of <em>Swarrfayri</em> to craft for me. I actually sketched the clearing from memory before giving it to them to add it and coloured it in the inside of the pendant" he sheepishly admitted.</p><p>She kind of suspected it was a personal demand but to hear it still came as a shock. And to think, he even sketched their clearing.</p><p>Her throat made a gurgling sound as she moaned her anguish.</p><p>If there was one gift that could have moved her more, well, she didn't know it. If there was one present she couldn't refuse it was a souvenir of this special moment with him.</p><p>He had took the time to add Snow to it.</p><p>She snorted internally. He had even put three initials for Kuon, Ren and Corn as an inside joke.</p><p>How much more he wanted her to take? She couldn't breath. She felt like she would explode what she really felt if she just opened the mouth again.</p><p>"You're angry?" after another long while where she refused to look at him, unable to control her emotions.</p><p>She shook violently her head but kept it in her knees.</p><p>"You don't like it?" he asked then and she could hear the creeping disappointment edging close.</p><p>She wanted to laugh. And cry more.</p><p>She had never thought the day would come where another present would compare to her Corn's stone.</p><p>How could he think she didn't like it? She let out a whine of despair that came out in something in-between a maniac laugh and an agonizing cry.</p><p>After all of this. She had no chance to not like it and he should damn know it.</p><p>She breathed in and out for one minute more and she could feel the worry climbing on her side breaking a smile out of her.</p><p>"Kyoko, if you don't like it I could give it bac-</p><p>"Don't you dare!" She growled in her lap before straightening up to glare at him but he paled at he saw she had cried.</p><p>"You cried" he stated in horror.</p><p>She chuckled dryly at his appals. If only he knew the measure he was able to get out of her.</p><p>But the knowledge of him seeing her in that state knowing why she was in it still made a light hue appeared.</p><p>She turned her head to the side to avoid his piercing stare.</p><p>"I'm just-just…touched"</p><p>"So it's not out of sadness?"</p><p>"Of course not!"</p><p>He relaxed, visibly relieved and Kyoko sighed. Cute baka.</p><p>Ren was beginning a new sentence but something launched itself around his neck as he opened his mouth and squeezed with a fair amount of strength. So much in fact he began to cough.</p><p>He was barely realizing it was Kyoko holding him in a vice arms hug when a soft brush of lips landed on his right cheek and a blushed crept in at the new awareness of the close contact.</p><p>He brought his arms around her frame as a whisper escaped her lips.</p><p>"Thank you"</p><p>"Sure" He reflexively answered.</p><p>"Does it mean you actually like it?" he asked after a few seconds.</p><p>"Idiot" She said and finally let go.</p><p>He saw her observing the pendant again with a smile before turning back to him with the fondest expression she had ever given him. Her eyes expressing so much tenderness his heart leaped in his rib cage.</p><p>"How could I not?" she replied as she stared at him with her gaze making melt his insides.</p><p>He rubbed his neck and even cleared his throat at the attention when he remembered something.</p><p>"Ah, I forgot to tell you" he started and pointed at the pendant still clamped in her hands, "You can slither a small picture in it on the side of the inscription, there is a small line spacing to slip one"</p><p>She nodded slightly in understanding and Ren felt like there was a weird tension in the air.</p><p>"Do you want me to hook it for you?" He heard himself asked, the mouth arid.</p><p>She looked surprised at his proposition at first then smiled and clapped back the pendant for him to take.</p><p>He retrieved it from her and opened the chain as he asked.</p><p>"Which side do you want it?"</p><p>"Isn't the face the one with the infinity sign and the drawing the back? "she asked.</p><p>He shook his head, smiling to himself she did recognized the sign from what it was even if she didn't what it represented for him.</p><p>"It was conceive so that you could wear whatever side front"</p><p>She looked enchanted at the new but still asked for the sign at the front.</p><p>He drove the chain around her neck, delicately clipped it at the nape and his fingers brushed the skin there when he withdrew.</p><p>"Thank you" she said as she rubbed her nape lightly and Ren looked at her weirdly making her answer his unvoiced question.</p><p>"I'm ticklish there" she told him with a light blush and Ren resisted very hard thinking about what he could do with this information even though the images came anyway.</p><p>His lips tingled as he imagined dropping myriad of kisses there and making her squirm and moan and-</p><p>He shook his head and realized Kyoko was talking to him.</p><p>"Hmm?"</p><p>"Can I ask you a question?" She repeated.</p><p>When he nodded she opened her mouth then closed it before starting again.</p><p>"You didn't answer me earlier…Why wings? Why an angel? Why comparing me to-hu-"</p><p>He grinned.</p><p>"Because you saved me so many times. Because you were always there to bring me back from my past, my own darkness" He explained with a soft voice.</p><p>"So you are kind of an angel to me" He stated. "My angel"</p><p>She turned a deep hue and turned away from him mumbling about ridiculous men.</p><p>"I didn't do much, you are making such a big deal of just a few words" She protested as she twirled back to face him with a crimson face and Ren felt elated he was still able to produce that sort of reaction out o her and found it was even cuter than in the past.</p><p>He bent forward a bit as he retorted.</p><p>"It's not because you are blind that I'm wrong"</p><p>She gaped at him.</p><p>"You're insane" She declared.</p><p>"It looks really beautiful on you" he said eying the pendant. "Even better that I imagined"</p><p>She lifted her hands at him, speechless, waving at his form like she didn't know what to do with him and he amused him greatly.</p><p>"Am I frustrating you?"</p><p>"You have no idea"</p><p>He smirked.</p><p>"Good"</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Kisses.Enjoy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0053"><h2>53. The Christmas ball Part 6 - like a fairy tale-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.<br/>Am I laying it thick? Yup. Do you need more toothpaste for your future rotten teeth, most probably. Not happy, bite me. Did I warn I love fluff and drama, like a lot? Maybe not enough. So here we are. You are going to eat those two ingredients by pool spoon. If you have an indigestion, go read something less fluffy. But I won't make less of it. Also, I know some people might be getting impatient to get them together but I'm stating it again, I'm going to take my time and I'm sure after last chapter, some people might start to see the road I'm taking. Which means it will happen but not right around the bush. <br/>Note in passing: begging for it might make me want to torture you even more. Just so you know.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Can we switch to next present?" inquired Ren already eager at the prospect now that he knew the pendant had been well received by her.<br/>She writhed in terror as she heard that but after all the emotions she just went through she didn't have the spirit to complain anymore. <br/>She was about to agree when she remembered she also had an effortless way to get back at him and began to throttle like a maniac when she sorted out in her mind a very funny detail she had failed to see until now. <br/>"What's so funny?" asked Ren curious.<br/>She shook her head unable to speak at the moment between her bouts of laughs and cough several times as she struggled to pull out something out of the inside pocket of her coat.<br/>When she finally calmed down, she straightened up and clasping a square package in her hands she turned back to him.<br/>"It's just-…I got under the impression that sometimes…Sometimes we just have a similar thinking…well, she corrected with a new smile seeing his confusion, " More like…Great minds think alike"<br/>He crooked his head on the side but he seemed to have understood, vaguely what she meant even if he didn't know in what way.<br/>So Kyoko opened her hands showing him the packet before unceremoniously making it land in his lap.<br/>He stared at it, completely confused.<br/>"You didn't think I would not find a way for pay back, did you?"<br/>He seemed even more lost and she held back a grin.<br/>"Pay back?"<br/>"I'm going to guess the magical but extravagant thing around my neck is the birthday gift, right?"<br/>He nodded.<br/>"So putting the wonderful roses aside you do not seem to have counted for some delirious reasons" she commented, still not understanding why he would go to such lengths or why he wasn't able to be moderate in his expenses toward others, "what you are trying to pull out on me is the-<br/>"Christmas present" Ren finished for her with a grin that suffused no reject. <br/>Kyoko grinned back victoriously.<br/>"So…I should be allowed to give a Christmas present too, right?" she innocently said as a question but not really one in fact.<br/>He looked at the package in wonders then back at her.<br/>"No objection?"<br/>He bowed humbly, pinching his lips in amusement.<br/>"You clearly robbed me of any way to be untitled in doing so"<br/>"Good"<br/>He chuckled at the way she replied like he did a minute ago.<br/>He went back to the packet with growing curiosity.<br/>"Can I open it?"<br/>"Sure"<br/>He deliberately unpacked it as slowly as he could to savour it. He was touched she thought of him. It didn't even cross his mind that she could offer him something for Christmas but he was happy.<br/>Once unwrapped he found himself staring at a little jewellery box and he barfed as her previous comment came back into mind.<br/>"Now I see why you said we thought alike"<br/>She quirked one side of her mouth.<br/>"Keep going"<br/>He lifted the lid, lips quivering in excitation until he saw the beginning of a silver chain under a protection wrapper.<br/>He eyed her.<br/>"Seriously?"<br/>"Yup"<br/>"Is it a fairy?"<br/>She snorted, mirth in the eye.<br/>"Not quite"<br/>He observed the still covered thing with gnawing anticipation.<br/>Finally, he took hold of the protection paper sheet and pushed it away to reveal what was inside.<br/>He outright laughed while his heart bubbled with joy.<br/>"No way…"<br/>She smiled at him and Ren picked up the platinum pendant laying in the box. Though contrary to his gift to Kyoko it was not a medallion or locket. It was rather simple but still elegant. A rectangular plate form of at least 5 millimetres, so a little thicker than Kyoko's pendant which was only 2 and an half, composed it. Or so he more or less estimated. It was attached to the chain by the centre of the small sides of the rectangle where two very small rings welded to it permitted to hook the long chain. Which means it was worn at the horizontal. <br/>The plate was simple. 6 and an half cm upon 2 and half maybe. It could rotate on itself on the length from one side of the plate to the other.<br/>But it was the engraved inscription.<br/>Written at the front Fairy boy could be read and when he upturned it, Fairy man appeared carved on the other side of the smooth surface.<br/>He snorted. She had dared. <br/>But,<br/>It was cute and yet fitting. The plain but class design made it something he could wear in his every day routine without a care and just by a glance he could also tell it was robust so he wouldn't have to worry about damaging it. <br/>She had found something that would fit his tastes and image and made it so much more. He chuckled inwardly. In her own way, she had made it as much about something between them as he had. They did think akin. <br/>He had wondered if she still thought about their times as children as fondly even if she now knew he was not a fairy but he might now have had his answer.<br/>"I can't believe you chose this sort of engraving" he laughed again.<br/>Kyoko grinned.<br/>"Hey, I nearly used boy on both faces"<br/>"Like what?" He asked, curious to know what could have her other ideas.<br/>She brushed her hair back in thought and Ren contained a sigh.<br/>"Hmm…Fairy boy/Sneaky boy" she said after some thought.<br/>He barked.<br/>"Or if I kept man I thought about "teasing man" " she added with a knowing perked brow.<br/>"I'm not such a teaser"<br/>"Or playboy man"<br/>He grimaced. When will he be able to get rid of that notion she had concerning him?<br/>"Keeping fairy fitted you better though so" she nicked in all false seriousness. "You're my fairy after all"<br/>"Thank you for your restraint" he commented with some relieved in his smile as he dissimulated the summersaults his pulse just made at the possessive pronoun she just used toward him.<br/>"Pffff…"<br/>Laughers escaped them.<br/>Ren's eyes landed back on the pendant plate as his hand brushed it and he quieted down. It was the very first gift that felt so personal. The pillow was out of utility. He had told her he had troubles sleeping and that's how she thought about it he guessed.<br/>But this, <br/>This was intimate. At least to him. This was a bond between them. Something that irremediably linked them and plastered that bond to the world. Even if she wasn't aware of it. <br/>Not only because it will be out for everyone to see but because it shown a little part of their common past. Of how dear it was. <br/>She hadn't made it about something that necessarily needed a purpose. It was a tool or any sort of object that was supposed to help him take better care of himself. Not that he didn't liked when it was the case but it was more distant.<br/>Not this time.<br/>She had made her gift about him, about them. About her notion of him. <br/>His fingers wrapped around the plate barely touching in fear it would evaporate or disappear. His index played with the chain as his thumb caressed the carved words.<br/>It was like a signature of how she cared about their children memories. <br/>It could have stopped there.<br/>But the fact she engraved fairy man on the other side made him paused. It looked like she was acknowledging him as a man. Though, he knew it wasn't in the way he wished for. He thought it seemed like she was seeing for the man he was now, the person he was now and not only for the child with who she played with when they were little.<br/>That was the impression it was giving him. By those words, she was acknowledging him. <br/>Maybe he was over-interpreting it but he knew Kyoko wasn't the kind to let things to coincidences.<br/>The fact she still used the word fairy to designate himself right beside the word man touched him the most. It was the biggest certitude and proof he would ever had she hadn't been hurt or her view tarnished by the plain sad true she guessed years ago.<br/>And coming from her, it was like the highest compliment he could receive, no, that anyone could receive. Especially since she knew he wasn't one but still referred to him as one after all this time. It was like she was saying he would always be a fairy to her. Even right now. Even after his lies and the truth laying thick for a long while now. Even if he had no true magic to offer to her. <br/>And while knowing he wasn't magical, it meant that somehow somewhere inside of her, he was still magical for her. Maybe. Not magical in the sense of some magical creature of course. But perhaps magical in the sense of special?<br/>Magic has always been her special. <br/>He wanted to shoot himself for this torturous pattern he was following. <br/>It was so simple and yet so difficult to admit when he knew what it would do to his heart and he had been circling around the notion so that his mind wouldn't be able to put an exact word on it.<br/>But there was no use. He knew.<br/>In short and not alembicated thinking it meant he felt special.<br/> He felt special. He felt like she saw him in her own special way. <br/>He even seemed like she was taking a step toward him with this. Though no matter how closer they would be it would never be enough until he had her forever.<br/>Still,<br/>He didn't think any present could have represented more to him than this right this moment.<br/>"Ren…Ren..Ren!"<br/>He came out of his thought after the last one and turned to her puzzled.<br/>"Sorry, you were saying?"<br/>She stared at him oddly before pointing at his hands.<br/>"I hope it isn't too tawdry she started again. "I'm sorry if it is. I tried to keep it as sober as I could but-<br/>"Fasten it up for me" he cut her and held it in the air with zest and an open face that didn't let any unsavoury feeling be perceived making Kyoko rethink he had ever been unhappy with it.<br/>She seized the chain and clipped the pendant behind his neck quickly.<br/>"What do you think?" inquired Ren before posing.<br/>She giggled at his antics as she observed how well the necklace landed just below his collarbones to the long chain and his massive shoulders. She had thought it would landed lower but hadn't want to take too much of a small chain knowing his build. There was even a little chain extension in the box just in case. Not because she thought it wouldn't do with what she chose but because she saw him wear longer lower chains so she wasn't sure what length he would prefer.<br/>But with the chain that wasn't the most pliable, less floppy than some, despite being far from thick, it made a large circle from one collarbone to the other without even touching the neck in the end. <br/>It just hooked around there, the chain outstretched against the top of the central part of his back before coming to the front. Not even dipping at the place of the plate itself. How he managed that just by the amplitude of his shoulders was beyond Kyoko.<br/>"It looks amazing on you" she said.<br/>He beamed and before she could realize it he took her by the waist and pulled against his side in an one-arm hug making her fuzzy instantly.<br/>"I love it" He breathed. <br/>"Thank you"<br/>Her heart raced at his soft voice coming near her ear but she managed to pull out "you're welcome" even then.<br/>He let go too soon to her taste but she couldn't complain.<br/>When he smirked all of sudden before bringing back to her the bigger brown package of earlier she bit her lips and looked at him.<br/>"Don't worry he said with a chuckle, "it's not as fancy and I even had some doubts but I thought that you might still like it so-"<br/>Now she was curious.<br/>She pulled at the soft green ribbon and eyed him as she did so.<br/>He smiled.<br/>"Go on. It won't bite"<br/>She pulled her tongue at him and resumed to unwrap the packet. She heard him cough but didn't really pay it mind.<br/>It happened the package was a damn trap. She knew that the minute she was halfway through opening it and noticed the three pieces between the protections folder sheets. <br/>She growled at Ren.<br/>"Now, now, calm down" he said and lifted his hands in an appeasing manner. "I know it seems like a lot started Ren, "but I didn't really know what you would like but I did see you looking cold several times since you came back and even grumbling about it over the phone when you were distracted and well I thought about the different situations you might need it and well, I ended up buying those three" he scrambled under her glare.<br/> She couldn't argue she was having an hard time adapting herself between the travels from the States to here and back. <br/>Her body had seemed to be regularly confused about how to feel about the temperature no matter where she would be those days. Japan had seemed cold when she came back. Maybe because it was still pretty gentle in San-Francisco thanks to the coast. But after a few weeks on Japanese grounds, it had felt warmer. And when she went back to the States it had felt freezing even if her body had been completely fine with this temperature the precedent years. And now she was back again in Japan and the thermometer said it was less cold than from where she came but for some obscure reason, her body didn't seemed to have taken note of that.<br/>It was far from the first time she travelled from one country to another, though. It didn't make any sense. How the hell did he even noticed that sort of thing? </p><p>Under her suspicious gaze, he smiled and explained.<br/>"I know how the temperature changes can be draining, especially between an island and another country"<br/>Kyoko looked at him, confused but still replied.<br/>"I travelled between States and England several times and never had this issue" she opposed.<br/>He shook his head.<br/>"It's not the same. From what I know and learned England is generally milder in winter and steadier thanks to warmer streams so the temperatures rarely go under the zero" He said. "So coming from California, the difference is lesser than to Japan where weather variate a lot from the area you are and it's sometimes colder. And if you add global climate change you can find yourself with messy days with snow in California like those last few years or more intense freeze in Japan"<br/>"Chaos in short" she commented.<br/>He chuckled.<br/>"Pretty much"<br/>"But though it's all places where the weather is supposed to be clement in winter he added after thought, "most changes seemed to go toward the colder side in those places. At least in winter."<br/>"So you thought I might need some warmer things"<br/>He nodded.<br/>"I tried to pick things that could be wear over blouses or shirts but also that suffice in itself but you'll have to tell me" he added.<br/>She was so focused on his elaborated explanations, she gobbled it all without even thinking it was clothes he had bought her. <br/>Not finding any way to refuse it and frankly not wanting to, she finally finished unpacking it and pushing aside the last remains of semi-transparent sheets, she revealed what was inside.<br/>A neat pile laid on her lap. The clothes looked thick and were of several colours. A deep red one. A very pale violet. And a light frozen lavender blue one. <br/>She took the vibrant red one in her hands and slowly unfolded it. It was a slim pullover in twisted mesh that had long sleeves, a turtleneck and would reach third of her thighs. It had also square front pockets to put your hands there. It looked rather elegant but still comfortable. <br/>She was amazed he got her size right when she checked it. She hadn't even spent that much time with him. <br/>How did he even…?<br/>She shook her head and inspected the other two.<br/>The violet one was longer and the cut quite intricate. It was a ribbed dress-pull with a large turtleneck and tailored to be slightly oversized. This time it was meant to reach at least mid-thigh. The sleeves seemed to be ample and spacious and the shoulders more fitting but bust still slightly roomy. Then around the waist it was wider before tightening in an edging seam around the area where should go the backside and the top of her thighs. Two discreet slits indicated the presence of pockets too. <br/>It was a really complicated cut and yet it looked so comfy and soft that just touching the texture of the cloth made her wish to be on her couch with her cat, reading while wearing this. <br/>She bit her lips and folded it back before taking the last one. The light blue poncho. It was hooded batwing-shaped coat with a white fluffy edge on the hoodie. <br/>It was very stylish and beautiful and she could tell it was in cashmere, her model jobs had made her learn a few more things on clothes compositions until she could recognize some by heart.<br/>They were all absolutely enchanting and perfect for her. But they also all looked damn pricey. <br/>There was a brand on each of them and she started to wonder if the reason she didn't recognized them was because the brands weren't famous enough or on contrary far too famous for her to know those. <br/>There were those brands that were just classical, so international that everyone knew them. But those weren't part of that. <br/>Kyoko briefly wondered if he had done that on purpose before changing her mind. He couldn't know which one she knew and wouldn't have gone as far just so that she would accept them, she was sure.<br/>She contained a sigh. It was all so incredible. He had thought of everything. She didn't have any excuse available to refuse. Not that she wanted to but it was beside the point. She would have refused if it wasn't so useful, so amazing and so coming from him.<br/>Her eyes glazed over the outfits as she folded back the third one and caressed the cloth of the poncho thoughtfully.<br/> How did he think of all of that? How was she supposed to react? <br/>Oh, she knew how she wanted to. She wanted to kiss him. Hell, she wanted to model those for him so he would tell her what he thought. Worse, she wanted an occasion to cuddle with him while wearing this. But she couldn't. <br/>And now she wanted to murder her own mind to wander too far. <br/>It's just damn pulls!<br/>Utility Pulls. For cold weather. For cold days. For cold nights. Pulls to remove.<br/>Why was she turned on by the prospect of mere pullovers? <br/>Kyoko wanted to hit her head on something.<br/>How could comfy be such a dangerous zone with him? Comfy was comfy. And Ren was Ren-Kuon-Corn. But now she knew mixing the two was like an elixir of seduction. Irresistible, deadly and too sexual for her own peace of mind.<br/>She needed get things under control. Right. She just had to find something better to think about. It was just clothes. Brand new ones. But just clothes. Boring magnificent clothes. <br/>And even if they were comfy, it would never be as good as it had been his clothes she would have worn. <br/>NOT HELPING!<br/>Okay. Just don't think about anything related to Ren, clothes or comfy and you'll be safe she thought.<br/>"So?" came the voice of Ren, "Are they alright? Or did I make a mistake?" he asked her peaking over her shoulder.<br/>Kyoko shook her head and Ren's face turned disappointed.<br/>"You don't like them. Sorry, I knew I was taking a risk but I still thought that-<br/>"Baka, why are you jumping to the worst scenario?"<br/>"You are the one to talk" he fired back.<br/>"Touché" she laughed.<br/>"They are incredible, Ren" she admitted and he brightened hearing that. "Perfect. And I love them but it's too much" She shook her head. "It's far too much" she said again. And he had already offered her the medallion. <br/>"You are not allowed to refuse them" he reminded with s severe face. He would not let her refuse them. <br/>"You already gave me a Christmas present so I'm entitled to give you one, remember" <br/>She bit her tongue, wanting to retort it was not the same, that it was far more and so much more but felt like she had walked by herself and settled her own trap in advance.<br/>She sighed and nodded as she looked back at the outrageously impressive presents on her lap. <br/>Ren's face into her field of view when he bent and twisted his head to meet her lowered eyes.<br/>"You like it" he softly said, "please, don't refuse it" <br/>Why did it looked like he was talking about something else altogether?<br/>He placed his hand on his heart and turned his most pitiful puppy eyes at her "I put my all into choosing some that you would like you know, you would wound me if you refuse them"<br/>She placed her hand on his eyes so she wouldn't have to look into them more.<br/>"Okay okay, I got it, I got it. As if I ever had a chance to get out of here without them anyway" she grumbled to hide her disturbance. <br/>His lips stretched but she didn't pull her hand off his eyes, her owns focused on the full and tempting lips barely a few inches away from hers. They looked firm but very smooth from where she was. She wanted to nib at them. Why did they looked so suave, lightly wet as they were. <br/>So sexy…<br/>She nearly jumped back when she realized she was starting to close in and removed her hand.<br/>"Sorry" she said.<br/>He shook his head. As if he was going to complain when she was touching him. Any graze was a drop water to the thirsty man he was. <br/>"But shouldn't I get a new kiss for this one too?" He asked as he pointed to his cheek. "One gift, one present"<br/>She snorted but leaned in anyway. She was starting to think he was in fact the cuddly type under his usual mask. Maybe she would have the chance to discover if her guess was right in the future…<br/>She pecked his cheek.<br/>"Thank you. They are really beautiful. Even if you shouldn't have" she still added in the end.<br/>"You're welcome" he said and she rolled her eyes before her gaze naturally came back to fondly look at him.<br/>He did the same, completely oblivious of how they looked or how much emotion they emitted at the moment and could have go on like that for a while if music hadn't start again all of sudden.<br/>Kyoko looked at the direction of the ballroom with surprise. When did the music resumed? She hadn't noticed at all.<br/>"It seemed the ending theme began without us" said Ren looking in the same direction as her.<br/>She nodded and Ren grinned before smoothly standing and turning back to her.<br/>"It would be a shame to not participate at all to it so what do you think of here?" he said as he slowly presented his palm to her.<br/>"Are we even allowed to stay here?" she asked.<br/>"No one came back for us so why not?"<br/>She took his hand and he lifted her up. What else could she do? She would never say no to this hand. No matter her secrets, no matter what she thought or felt. Each time this hand would there, she would take it. She would always take it. Whether to help him or to be with him. Or for whatever reason would arise or make it possible.<br/>They danced. They danced under the snow falling on them forgetful of anything that wasn't them. They danced several times through at least 4 of the six songs and paused to discuss a bit at times. Kyoko didn't remember all the songs but three of them. One was called Never say goodbye, another The stroke of midnight and finally the last one, the one that marked her the most in this theme, Time you should be sleeping.</p><p>They hadn't care about anything and by the time it finally ended, they were freezing. She had taken the time to wrap back the clothes to protect them from the snow but she hadn't a wrapper to protect herself and him from it. They couldn't pass on anything else on with the costumes anyway.<br/>And even then they were sort of in a daze as they slowly made their way back inside as Lory declared he had the 5 winners and 15 losing ones in two envelopes but that he will announce who they are after the break while the room are prepared for the second part of the night. He told everyone to direct themselves in the big room and relax for a bit while they do that to already gather their outfit for after because the second the winners and losing ones are announced they will go change and the wheels and second part won't start until everyone is changed and settled.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I wish you all well. Enjoy.<br/>Lot of kisses.<br/>Reviews are food. Feed me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0054"><h2>54. The Christmas ball Part 7 Cozying around -part 1-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They chatted together all the while the break lasted and Kyoko saw Ruto-san taking a sleeping Maria-chan in his arms but just before exiting the room where they all gathered, she woke up and though Kyoko could tell she was tired she apparently decided to stay. It was a bit late but it wasn't every day her birthday so she could understand she wanted to stay.</p><p>She also noticed the stares. Everyone was looking at Ren oddly. Like they were suspicious. And they wouldn't let their gazes go anywhere but on him and were gossiping a lot. Like they just found out the juiciest thing in the world though Kyoko couldn't hear what they were saying.</p><p>She looked down on her, wondering if she had done something wrong or anything was out of place. She patted her head but no she had put back the wig and her hat before coming back.</p><p>It took a small group coming closer for her to be able to get what was going on and she paled.</p><p>Damn. How stupid. She had forgotten all about that.</p><p>She spun toward Ren, already taking a step back.</p><p>"I'll go to the other side for now"</p><p>He frowned and she shot her chin in the direction of the gossipers.</p><p>He eyed the crowd and breached his lips obviously ready to protest if his displeased expression was anything to go by but she was already retreating somewhere else and too quickly people hided her from him until he lost sight of her figure.</p><p>Lory came back with Ruto and some assistants soon after that and he started to announce the different people found out at the very beginning of the night.</p><p>Once he was done with all of the fifteen losing ones and after reminding them they would all have a round of the Wheel of Traps later, he switched to the five winners of the night.</p><p>Ren was surprised he hadn't been in the first people discovered. Everyone knew it was him under his mask. Hiding his height was not something manageable no matter what he did, he had even took a few centimetres these last years for goddamn's sake. Plus, most people knew he would participate. The only way that had ever worked to hide him in plain sight was making him scary and it hadn't been an option this time. So it was really a wonder he hadn't been part of the fifteen losing people. Hell, he should have been the first one.</p><p>Not that he had really cared but it was funny.</p><p>He went back to his search, vaguely hearing Kaï was third place and happy for him as he continued to earnestly let his eyes wander in hope to catch her. He didn't care what people would say. He just wanted some more time with her. He was done playing safe for the sake of his image or whatever. He was in no position to share his intentions and feelings to her but he wouldn't take more bullshit about distance, image and such. Whatever he could grab, he would take.</p><p>He was allowed to have a life. The walls he was confronted to in the inability to be more was bad enough. If he couldn't even be friend with her as he wished to because of people gossiping, he would be at his demise.</p><p>No way would he accept it. Gossip could rot in hell.</p><p>Yet his eyes couldn't find her. Where did she hide?</p><p>He was about to break through the crowd when a new uproar arose in the form of countless whispers before Lory gladly asked again to Ren Tsuruga to unveil himself.</p><p>He looked back toward the direction of his boss 'voice and found him snickering wildly as he spoke again.</p><p>"I'm sure you are all shocked to learn our dear Ren won second place this evening," Lory said. "I was quite amused and shocked myself when I read his name," he shared. "But you see, that's the beauty of it," he told them, "Everyone knew it was Ren but apparently it was so obvious that barely anyone took the time to write his name."</p><p>"So now Ren, could you come here and unveil yourself before we drop dead of waiting," asked Lory as he pointed at the ground of the stage.</p><p>Ren made his way to him under the chuckles of several people and he even saw Maria-chan, not far from her grandfather quietly laughing.</p><p>He walked up to Lory level and slightly bowed to the crowd before removing his casket and mask.</p><p>Lory made a grant gesture with his arm pointing at Ren.</p><p>"Meet the man that gathered only 5 signatures despite everyone knowing it was him. Isn't it impressive?"</p><p>A fair share of the guests snorted again. And though you could tell some people were bitter or displeased by it, most didn't seem to mind. It was fair game after all. They could have given his name but didn't.</p><p>Finally Ren saw her, leaning against some wall far behind all the other guests, she was laughing, eyes seeming to shine even at this distance.</p><p>Ren thanked the president and bowed before accepting the two envelopes he was presented with. One he was instructed to open later for the second part of the night and the other containing the coupon for two Spa days and the 15 days Leave order (that was how Ren considered it). He guessed the other one should contain the Wheels ordeal thing.</p><p>He stepped off stage after one last bow and Lory whispering to him that since he won that leave, he would be hell-bent on making him take it.</p><p>Taking advantage of the momentum and dynamism Ren passage had left, Lory took back his mike with a new glee rising.</p><p>"Now everyone, it's time to announce the winner of our game," the president said with much emphasis and Ren back at one corner of the room, smiled.</p><p>"I'm sure you are all very curious to know who achieved in not being unmasked all night" said the president as he saw people shifting in curiosity. "We will meet our mysterious guest soon. I already sent Ruto fetch that person so just wait a few more instants"</p><p>From afar Ren distinctly saw the moment Ruto reached her and her gaping mouth at what it involved. He saw her lifting her hand, no doubt to brush her hair again and dropping it at last second, looking completely embarrassed. Still she succeeded in pulling herself back together.</p><p>The excitation had climbed in highs as people were starting to get impatient but they managed to stay put until they saw Ruto-san coming back in his erased silent step accompanied by some mysterious man that still provoked several gasps when some people recognized him to be Ren's partner for most evening.</p><p>The man smoothly climbed on the dais with his fluid masculine gait and pushing a leg backward, he elegantly bowed to everyone in his perfect standing.</p><p>"Mister", started the Lory with a glimmering light in the pupil, "Would you be so kind to remove your disguise for all of us and unveil who you are?"</p><p>The figure gathered on itself and soundly nodded. The gait subtly changed. More supple, more fluid. The hat was dropped. One hand seemed to pull at the messy hair while in fact it was swiftly pushing it out of the way and off the head provoking an horrified gasp in the crowd.</p><p>Until locks began to fall and fall and fall, to no end. To spectators eyes it appeared like that. The golden hue and far lighter mane than what Japanese were used to, standing out.</p><p>Then gasps shifted to surprise and wonder.</p><p>The silhouette grimaced grasping the sudden attention and uproar she was creating and clearly perceiving the snickering of her incessant plotting president. She deeply regretted having to be on stage and being the winner of this damn game. She didn't care once a bit about winning it and could only the troubles it would get her. Just seeing her boss' smile could only mean there was more doom to come for her.</p><p>Two fingers silently captured the mask in their grasp and slowly removed from around the mysterious eyes gleaming behind it.</p><p>She smiled naturally; a bit constricted internally and inclined in old fashion way, bowing as the man she had been all night.</p><p>Speechlessness followed for an heavy second before clapping erupted accompanied with diverse chuckles here and there as people found clear amusement at having been so utterly fooled. Comments and excited questions fused soon after but there were also some derogatory remarks coming from some people a little more than displeased. There were sparse but loud.</p><p>"That's another level of cheating"</p><p>"Did you see how she was clinging herself to Tsuruga-san?"</p><p>"So it was rigged from the start"</p><p>And some.</p><p>Kyoko didn't comment. Unless she wasn't aware of something she didn't think the president would have pipped the game. He was most certainly responsible of the number of dances she had with Ren, that she didn't have any doubt on but cheating was not his type. She was ready to step off stage, the faster the better but a loud whistle interrupted it all and everyone turned their attention to a cheering Momose-san.</p><p>"I can't believe you managed to trick us to that level, Kyoko-san" she loudly said as she made her way to the front. "Can you even guess?" she said in a more normal voice's volume as she reached the edge of the stage between people though as no one was talking anymore, it didn't really matter as everyone could still hear her.</p><p>Her question was directed at Kyoko though and she arched her brow in direction of Momose in interrogation with an added thankful smile. She was glad for the interruption and was pretty sure her former colleague did it on purpose.</p><p>"You fooled me so much, you succeed in persuading me so completely I was in front of a man I was attract by you for a minute out there when we were dancing" Momose said, pointing her hip out with an hand on it, her expression a perfect mix a shock, amusement and false outrage plastered on her face.</p><p>Kyoko pinched her lips and failed to contain a smile. She then deeply bowed in front of Momose-san and apologized.</p><p>"My sincere apologies for the misleading, Momose-san"</p><p>"Deception you mean" corrected her Momose, "I'm a little disappointed you know, I was planning to hit on you later" she said with what seemed to be sincerity and a frown and Kyoko could only blink.</p><p>
  <em>Seriously?</em>
</p><p>Several laughs rang and she deduced her expression must have been interesting enough because Momose soon giggled too before waving in the air with her hand.</p><p>"Don't worry, you stopped being on my target list the second I knew you were a woman" she told her and Kyoko couldn't help herself, she guffawed.</p><p>Soon, all the guests were laughing and the side comment of Momose about the competition being far too great for her anyway got lost in the loudness sprouting around.</p><p>Questions fired back once more, Momose, Kijima, Koga, everyone wanting to know how she did it. Especially the ones who had danced with her and had been fooled so royally.</p><p>She replied succinctly but honestly. Making brand new clothes look of period was the hardest when the materials were obviously not the same or as polished. She sewed some parts. Did some researches for others.</p><p>Then the president, who had kept silence until now, resumed his speech forcing the calm to return congratulating her once more for her ingenious disguise and to her appal presenting her to the crowd once more for a renewal of applause.</p><p>The president approached her and handed respectively a big thick card stating the number of rounds of The-Wheel-of-Gifts and the two ones for The-Wheel-of-Traps and two other envelopes. One containing the names, numbers and meeting already of directors and promotors and the other the week trip.</p><p>She thanked him in a daze, not really believing she had won, the situation just wasn't sinking in. It didn't make sense and she wasn't event there for it. Thus her mind refused to compute.</p><p>With full grandiloquence the president announced the first part of the night was now terminated and invited people to direct themselves to the changing room to pass on something more comfortable before the second part of the evening would begin.</p><p> </p><p>…</p><p>Kyoko was in the middle of changing after much teasing on the choice of dressing room's door she would choose when Momose-san's voice exploded just beside her. The place was a big unique room with lockers hung on the sides of the walls and benches. Modern but simple. But there were still a few enclosures provided by separation walls for showers but also for the people needing intimacy even through the same gender. She was thankful for it.</p><p>Not that her body was especially shameful or anything but she had some tattoos and she knew it wasn't always accepted amongst her Japanese peers. It's not she didn't want people to know she had them but she would rather avoid the remarks exposure would inevitably have triggered.</p><p>Yet, with the number of women needing to change, they had to share every compartment with a few women while they changed but it was significantly less than otherwise and she was confident she could handle just a few comments without getting an headache. Plus there was Momose-san with her.</p><p>So, it's practically without a care she had started to undress.</p><p>Until Momose-san outburst.</p><p>"What the hell is that?!" she had said staring at her and Kyoko at instinctively rose her hand to hid the tattoo on the naked skin at the front peaking from below the bandage caging her breast.</p><p>But she quickly noted the tattoo had been totally overlooked and Momose was looking higher, at the precise point where were situated her constricted breasts. She pulled her arms in front of her trying to dissimulate her sight to Momose.</p><p>Before realizing she was being utterly ridiculous and that she had to be much more exposed in the past to fret over something like.</p><p>She turned around, determined to ignore the staring and change herself. But it didn't deter Momose-san.</p><p>"Did you really wear this all night?" she interrogated and Kyoko shifted her toward her to look at the genuine puzzled but also horrified look of Momose-san.</p><p>Kyoko turned back completely to her perplexed but seeing she had totally misjudged her intentions.</p><p>"Yes, it was needed for the character and dissimulate my gender"</p><p>"Doesn't it hurt really bad?" asked Momose, pulling her own arms around her still in costume chest like she could protect her breasts of an invisible force.</p><p>"Well-Kyoko started, "It's far from being comfortable, it constricts a lot as you can bet but painful I don't know".</p><p>"It's more tight than painful but I paid a lot of attention on how I would roll the different layers around so it wouldn't pleat and pain me" she explained trying to reassure Momose-san.</p><p>The horror shifted to curiosity in the other woman's eyes and she fired questions at one mile a minute like she was on a mission to get more information.</p><p>Once her companion was satiated, finally she was able to go back to change herself and Momose gracefully proposed her help to unbind her breasts which she accepted because yes, she might have overdone it, it was starting to hurt a bit.</p><p>She unfasted the pin for her and Kyoko rolled-off the bands with a deep sensation of relief.</p><p>She sighed blissfully. She was glad it was finished, she had to admit.</p><p>She had thought Momose went back to change too but the whistle that followed disabused her.</p><p>She turned again. Reluctantly. And arched a brow at Momose.</p><p>Who was eyeing her up with much admiration though it went completely over the head of the principal concerned.</p><p>"I must say the years that passed really did you good" she praised and Kyoko decided here and there she was just going to change and ignore all that, she didn't know Momose could be this exuberant. Even if she shouldn't be the one to talk.</p><p>But Momose moved to stand in front of her.</p><p>"And look at this, you have fucking tattoos! That's so cool" she exclaimed already reaching to brush the one just under Kyoko's left breast.</p><p>She cleared her throat and nodded, glad Momose-san was so open-minded but feeling awkward at the proximity.</p><p>"Is it a lotus flower?" she kept on and Kyoko answered by the affirmative again while continuing to undress and pulling out her spares clothes but then changing mind. She went to her provisory locker and pulled out the red smooth turtle neck with a soft smile. It would as comfortable or even more than what she planned and she really wanted to put it on.</p><p>Plus it was fitting the Christmas' mood.</p><p>She passed it on swiftly, enjoying the soft yet warm texture and pulled over her new pendant, fuzziness blooming inside of her as she realized most of what she was wearing was from Ren. And for a second, the reality shifted a bit and she got an instant sensation of being together, with him. And then, the sensation disappeared. As it was all it was.</p><p>A fleeting impression.</p><p>A new rush of sadness threatened to overcome her with unfilled desires and repressed feelings coming back but she threw it all away. It was neither the time nor the place.</p><p>The thin dark pants she took with her matched perfectly with her new top dress pull and she was soon ready when Momose-san addressed her again complimenting her attire and asking where she had got it. To which Kyoko simply replied it was a gift, not précising further as she didn't want to answer to the questions and speculations that could follow if she knew it was from Ren.</p><p>Kyoko acknowledge with certainty what this gift was and wasn't. And if she knew it came from his heart, she also knew to not see it as something more. But others might not consider it that way. And stating that they were friends might not suffice to deter the ideas of some if they learned Tsuruga Ren bought her clothes.</p><p>An very old discussion from the past suddenly came back to her as she was slipping on the slippers arranged for every guest for the second part of the night and she had to contain a chuckle.</p><p>She remembered the big thing <em>he </em>had made of Kijima renting a dress for her at the occasion of the Dark Moon party years ago, how he had reprimanded her and warned her of what it could mean in all elegant and gallant speaking words for her prude innocent mind. Very well-formed compared to what Sho had served her.</p><p>She shook her head, the fuzziness back. She now knew he had just been trying to protect her from Kijima's attentions at the time. Though it was still a mystery how Kijima had been able to be interested in her at the time. She had been merely a child.</p><p>And a very plain one at that. In fact, even now she wouldn't consider herself like good potential partner. Yes, child she was no more. Yes, she was a woman. But she wasn't the most curvy one men affectionate. Neither the most feminine one. As, with time passing she had developed quite the interest in simple subtler things.</p><p>Not that she didn't like make-up anymore. Or that she didn't take care of herself. She did. A lot even. But her focus had shifted to more low-key or discreet things. She still worshipped make-up for the magic it provided into changing her into someone else but she didn't want to put too much when she was only her. She already had much difficulty being recognized as people never saw the actress behind the character which made her quite good at her jobs but also made it harder to become known. Thus she wanted to feel like herself and people to recognize her as her when she wasn't acting. Which means just enough make-up to enhance her features.</p><p>It frustrated her inner desires for cosmetics' magic regularly but at least she didn't feel like a foreign doll or stranger in her own skin.</p><p> She also came to love to feel comfortable all the time. So she made it her mission to be as elegant as her job required her to be while being always comfy.</p><p>And as she adapted herself to her limits and her tastes and knowledge of who she was grew, it became pretty clear she wouldn't fit the fancy boxes.</p><p>The more glitz there was the less it appealed to her. She could appreciate vibrancy of colours and textures but bright blinky-glitter didn't bode well. And it was a damn disadvantage for the job she was doing!</p><p>Her characters could shine and pass on the sparking attires when acting but if she needed to promote herself in her full solitary unpretentious self, she could only count on her professionalism and her stubbornness. She thought she could also estimate she had gain some frugal natural charm.</p><p>But most of the time, she was pretty sure, that compared to lustrous, voluptuous and shimmering creatures wandering entertainment world, it wasn't enough.</p><p>So if Kyoko thought objectively about it and considered she had just a tiny bit of natural charm and could look cute if trying, she didn't get at all how mature men could look at her out of anything more than friendship or politeness.</p><p>She kind of accepted that men out of entertainment industry could as there was the appeal of celebrity, of otherworldly that made them look through pink glasses.</p><p>And if not look over too closely and only in desire of unserious things men of the show-business might be also interested, she guess.</p><p>But in all fair-game and seriousness. When it wasn't for a quick fuck if she had to be crude?</p><p>Certainly not the ones living precisely in the glimmer world.</p><p>Certainly not the one she most wanted it to.</p><p>She wiggled off of the drifting thoughts she had fallen in shaking her hand in the air like it had appeared in front of her and she could erase them with her hand.</p><p>She looked around and gathered her stuff noticing Momose-san had vacated the place and left while she was lost in thoughts.</p><p>Pulling out her phone she understood why and hurried out to where all the guests were.</p><p>…</p><p>When she walked through in the room looked drastically different. In fact, the only thing still resembling a ballroom was the shiny-glassy floor.</p><p>Thick colourful plushy covers had been hung out while they had vacated the room and now decorated most walls and corners of the big place. There were deep red or pine forest green and could have passed as plaids from where she stood.</p><p>The buffet with cocktails, aperitifs and other drinks had been replaced by cute little curvy tables with hot beverages like teas and coffees and to her delight, hot cocoa.</p><p>But the most impressive thing were the countless huge flat cushions and pillows set around by band of two, three or five on the floor. In the middle of the room, a dozen of them situated like a moon arc, against most of the walls, in every corner possible; they were everywhere. Those gigantic stuffed or bin pillows throned, ready to receive the mighty backside of numerous guests when some weren't already seated on them in full comfort with a ceramic cup of the hot beverages proposed in their hands. There were also some big armchairs here and there but there weren't that many of them.</p><p>Most of the people back from changing were chatting mildly, slowly settling themselves while the president finished whatever plan he came in with for the second part of the night.</p><p>She warily eyed the big wheels placed slightly exenterated from the rest but so enormous than anyone will be able to identify whatever would happen with it from whenever the person would be in the ballroom and did the same as the others.</p><p>Seeing everyone settling and sitting as the room filled itself again, she renounced to her chocolate and made her way to the right side of the room finding some large and free green cushions that she could sit on.</p><p>All the time it lasted and even after she was seated, she eyed the guests for a certain someone before quickly concluding he wasn't back yet.</p><p>Kyoko decided to just relax herself for now and closed her eyes. A sweet subdued music was playing in the background and the light had been waned quite a bit more to fit the cosier intimate setting and it was infinitely pleasant after all the shimmering agitation of the evening. People were quieter, maybe feeling the first signs of tiredness for some, and the atmosphere was very serene. Thing she was greatly thankful for.</p><p>She enjoyed it while it last though even through closed lids she could still feel the room filling in and the casters of the big wheels gliding against the floor as it was moved to which she supposed was the centre of the place.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0055"><h2>55. The Christmas ball Cozying around -part 2-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p><p>Hello there, enjoy the chapter. Kekeke. This part isn't finished.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Casters rolled and rolled on the slick floor disturbing her peacefulness and ticking her as some irrepressible chuckled could be heard through the mike. No doubt to which it belonged to.</p><p>The maddening man then proceeded in calling people to stand up and come with their envelopes, to open them, give their coupon and start rolling the Wheel-of-Gifts.</p><p>And little by little each guest stood and went to spin the silver-blue wheel. Getting all sort of things. Make-up set, an adventure day at a park, tickets for amusement park, concerts tickets, A prepping day, some spa days again, A collection of the most popular shows of the moment and on.</p><p>All this time, Kyoko opened only opened her eyes back two times, in the shadows as she was she didn't to pretend and she feeling a little drowsy. Once when she heard the whispers of many women at some other corner of the room when Ren came back just before the wheel started to swirl.</p><p>And a second time when an excited gasped rang out and a man all but ran to Ren wagging high in the air a bright golden tickets looking a bit like hers. She had seen Ren congratulating him and had guessed he had won one of the trips hidden in the wheel.</p><p>She had smiled watching the sincere smile and affection on her friend's face as his overly too excited comrade barely contained shimming in joy. She recollected with a start, the man had also won third place. Now, she got why he was that happy. He had been lucky enough to won two main prices tonight.</p><p>His friend looked like he was the bubbly cute kind and she repressed a giggle. Ren sure needed those kinds of friends to pull in out of his broody silent self.</p><p>They had apparently already switched to the five winners of the night while she wasn't paying attention and now it was Ren's turn. He got up and walked to Lory's side in his gracious sexy walk and played the game with an amused smile on the face. And blatantly ignoring the grinning Lory behind him as he was making the wheel turn. She was impressed. It would have itched her all the while she would have been day to hide away or just get some distance knowing the crazy faces he would have been making in her back.</p><p>Ren won a VK game experience, a diner paid by LME and with someone of their choice, a premium sport set, a collection of the most popular music of the moment and an outfit paid and chosen by LME.</p><p>Ren's smile turned very bright at this one while the expression of the man behind shifted to madness.</p><p>He thanked the president and LME for the gifts very politely and regained his seat on some red cushion at the left side of the room.</p><p>She sighed as she realized it was her turn but diligently made her way to the president with an expression she hoped only contain a neutral smile and not urge to flee and awkwardness she felt.</p><p>The president asked her to open her envelope and give one coupon as a time before making the wheel spin. Kyoko executed herself.</p><p>As he did for the guests before, he announced the gifts loudly each time the pointer stopped. Feeling his glee in her back was indeed unnerving and she forced herself to stay relaxed.</p><p>"A spa day" he told with a little pout but Kyoko was happy, it would be very relaxing and it was the kind of things she didn't take the time to do. So it could be very nice.</p><p>"A sweets day" he said which apparently consisted of a tour of the best sweets and sweets shop of Tokyo. She pinched her lips, puzzled. She liked sweets, she did, too much even but it would be bad for her diet. Still, it wasn't every day you were offered that sort of stuff and she still loved culinary things. She would just need to do extra training the next day, she guessed.</p><p>"A pets day" followed and she glowed joyfully at that, she loved animals, it promised to be fun.</p><p>"An adventure day" said the president, fully sulking now and she grinned internally, it would compensated the sweets one. She would need to try to fit the two close in time to each other.</p><p>One of the numerous weekend somewhere in Japan and a collection of books were the final ones and she saw how difficultly the president contain his disappointment, wondering what else was it in there that could have suit the president tastes. She shuddered at the possibilities. But he perked fast back up and Kyoko didn't like what his renew of enthusiasm hided.</p><p>She made her thanks, feeling properly undeserving of all the gifts. She didn't do anything that could ever make it right to receive all of those amazing presents but she knew it was the game and she hadn't a voice into it.</p><p> Her boss then made a short speech about how and when the gifts or tickets could be retrieve and Kyoko took the opportunity to retreat to her seat quietly.</p><p>It was nearly 3 am and it was also the moment for the guests that didn't desire to remain, were too tired or had things to do in the morning to leave. Some had warned the president they couldn't remain through the end and now that everyone had at least had their round at the Wheel-of Gifts, a fair share needed to leave. That's how soon and little by little and finally at least three quarters of the people bid their goodbyes and good wishes before slowly leaving.</p><p>There was a floating moment while the remaining guests chatted together and were served or proposed a new service of hot beverages with this time hot red wine as an option and Kyoko finally got her cup of cocoa to warm her insides.</p><p>The silver wheel had been put away after some time and only remained daringly and painfully pink in the heart of the room, the Wheel-of-Traps. But contrary to the silver one, you couldn't see anything. Long stripes of white paper covered what could have given any indication on what was to be expected out this pink gaudy thing.</p><p>Then after some more time, the first fifteen people having been discovered were asked to come for some indications of last minute and soon the second and first place winner too.</p><p>They then asked out of them the most ridiculous request: To each put on some paper the names of at least two people they completely trust, safety people they called them. And to also put the names of a few, between 3 and five, they appreciated enough or enjoyed to spend time with but not necessarily trusted as much. Then to close the paper from prying eyes and give it to the organizers.</p><p>When they asked why, the only answer they got was that the wheel-of-Traps cur-gifts were about giving and receiving of some sort and thus always involved several people at once. The papers, one of the organizers had said at the time while dangling them in the air after collecting them, were their safety net from things they wouldn't absolutely want to do with people they didn't know at all.</p><p>The seventeen people presented had paled a little before going back to their respective cushions.</p><p>But they had barely made half of the way back to those when the president took the mike again.</p><p>"Now to everyone still there", started the president, "before we begin, I'd like to ask for a small arrangement".</p><p>"As you can see", the president explained with a wave in direction of the vacant seats and a shook of the head, "we lost a lot of our companions". And he still wondered why more people couldn't tell him the change they had made earlier didn't fit with them or wasn't possible. He had even taken the time to ask them. This tendency their culture had to not speak up was something than though Japanese himself he had never understood.</p><p>"We are barely a little more than one hundred now, 120 maybe, and the ballroom is far too large to be spread all around with so little people", the president continued, "so if you could all draw closer your pillows to make little circles of five to ten cushions that would all round the wheel at the centre, It would be a lot funnier for everyone" demanded Lory.</p><p>All guests easily complied, dragged or grabbed their cushions to bring them all forth and around while helped by some assistants, the president removed the base of the only wheel still present making it a lot smaller, standing on barely one inch-long bottom. Then Lory himself brought a large majestic golden cushion and established elegantly in a crossed-legs position on it, pulling his heavy robes of his costume up to the front.</p><p>"Now that we all are in a friendlier seating to enjoy ourselves and discuss", restarted the president with a purposeful pregnant pause and Kyoko sitting still on the right but as everyone much closer than before wasn't sure what exactly he was planning but she could tell he was scheming something, not surprising of course. She sighed and resigned herself to be his little marionette for a little longer tonight.</p><p>"Let's the pink wheel twirl" finished the president with a flourish and he swiftly called out the person who was the guest that had been unveiled by the most people.</p><p>The man, not quite middle-aged but only just stood and Kyoko recognized him as Takaji, one of the employers of LME that had been barely disguised tonight. He walked slowly to the monstrously pinky thing and made it swirl faintly before it stopped on a triangle of paper dissimulating the trap behind.</p><p>An assistant of the president caught the little carton-paper between two fingers and pulled at it to remove it.</p><p>And Kyoko thought she could relax when the letters printed out showed <em>A make-over </em>directed by one of the guests remaining here. The president then asked him how at ease the man was with this and depending on his answer, they would either choose from all the guests or from his safe people. He also informed as some last minute information that on some things, guests wouldn't have the choice and it would be directly chose from your safe people or extended. The guests not concerned by this looked around quite lost at those words but excited to what was to come.</p><p>The man, that didn't have much a choice, chose the later and was brought to another room with what she guessed, was someone he knew and her boss called the next person.</p><p>Her relief was short-lived.</p><p>As the people having lost the game scrolled by and more incongruous traps came out.</p><p> </p><p>The first few "traps" that followed still looked alright and if it hadn't been orchestrated by a certain lovemon, she wouldn't have feel edgy about it. It wasn't so bad. It was things like <em>A peck on the cheek of a person chosen </em>or <em>A small hug</em>,  <em>Organizing something for the talents of the agency  </em>or even something like <em>helping out at the Love me section </em>which seemed pretty good, she was already doing that though the sight of some grimaces was a tell the section got still some reputation. But there was still this je-ne-sais-quoi* feeling of where things were moving so she fixed with eagles' eyes each guest passing and white paper being removed when the pointer would stop with this hunch of an axe ready to fell.</p><p>She wasn't disappointed. It escalated quickly and she paled.</p><p>The trap turned sneakier as what followed were things like <strong><em>Organizing Valentine's day event of this year</em></strong> <strong>then <em>Organizing white day event of the two</em></strong><em> <strong>following years, Helping out the president with his costumes dressing room</strong> </em>or even <strong><em>A peck on the lips of a person chosen by LME.</em></strong></p><p>For each trap chosen, it was removed from the wheel thus each time was different and you never knew what next guest would get but to each triangle being removed she could feel the president overjoyed bouncing climbing.</p><p>To all guests credits, they all took their curse gracefully though the ones that followed systematically started to specify far before the pink wheel began to twirl, they would only accept their trap with one of their safe people. Kyoko, her, was deeply regretting opening her mouth earlier when they had to give their safe people names.</p><p>
  <em>I was too naïve…</em>
</p><p>And inevitably, the more stirring and thrilling curses were to come; and came. What could you expect, really, from an addict of love affairs beside improper love meddling. She shouldn't be surprised.</p><p>She wasn't thrown off then when a strangled gasp was pulled out loudly from some throat.</p><p>It had been Hiou turn. Like for Ren, most people had recognized him she guess on contrary for him, people had took the time to give away his name and not supposed everyone would give it anyway.</p><p>Thus, he was in the group of the firsts discovered.</p><p>And currently very much gaping and blushing at what was printed out on the wheel.</p><p>Kyoko looked back at the wheel, snorting at what it implied despite what she thought of it but shocked she still turned to the president making big accusatory eyes at him. He had dared to put <em>that</em> for a public event.</p><p>He was pouting a bit for some weird reason as he looked at the wheel then saw her glaring at him and whistled happily. All his creepy enthusiasm leaking out.</p><p>The trap said: <strong><em>Passionate tongue-kissing</em></strong><em>.</em></p><p>And Kyoko could easily figure out who was maybe the only person he gave on his safe people list.</p><p>Though she knew that at some, he could have trust enough to figure on that list too despite his fake hostility toward her in the past but she had been away for so long, it was normal. She hadn't even had the chance to talk to him about Kanae yet.</p><p>She observed her dear friend sporting a light hue herself, expecting her to protest loudly and all sort of "moh" to come out at the display of all of this but nothing.</p><p>Kyoko put her chin in her hand, chuckling inwardly as a very rigid Hiou made his way to her friend.</p><p>
  <em>Now, that's interesting.</em>
</p><p>Maybe the love madness of the president would help them and she wouldn't even have to say a word to Hiou, after all.</p><p>She peaked between her fingers when it happened seeing her friends flushing a lot and looking all awkward afterward and wished it would suffice to do the trick. Guests applauded a lot, laughing. At least the ones not still concerned by the wheel.</p><p>Every remaining people needing to go fetch his/her trap turned nervous and tense, eyeing with bad warily eyes the pink thing, now.</p><p>Kyoko wanted to pray to all fairies divinities as new ridiculous traps came about. <strong><em>A normal kiss, A two-days trip with someone chosen by LME, Walking home with someone this evening…</em></strong></p><p>She rolled her eyes at this.</p><p>
  <em>I have six chances, only one out of them is dangerous…it will be okay.</em>
</p><p>How deeply she regretted it. She had made the mistakes to ask the organizers that whatever her two traps would be, it would only be with the safe people she had put the names on. She hadn't wanted to risk it. And now, it was far worse.</p><p>She hadn't expected the president to go so absurdly far. She thought it would silly things. Like the ones asking to organize some events. About love of course but still very much okay. Silly her. So naïve.</p><p>She wished for so much for more possibilities, now. More people possible. But no, she had only 6 choices thanks to her stupid mouth. And she had to put his stupid name on this stupid paper.</p><p>There were only two people left before her, now. One was Ren and she suddenly wondered what he would get and how well could she pretend she would take whoever it will be with.</p><p><strong><em>A fifteen seconds lip-lock </em></strong>was what the last of the fifteen people unveiled first got and Ren won <strong><em>A one day date with someone chosen by LME </em></strong>which turned out to be with Koga because for some weird reason Ren hadn't said anything about his safe people and true she had found he was a bit lost in thought when he has pushed the wheel.</p><p>He had just vaguely watched it turned and hadn't reacted when the little hand-wheel in Ruto-san's hand serving to choose either through the safe people of the guest either through all the remaining guests present the person helping/ receiving the other side of this curse thing had been pulled out so the president's assistant had just do planned and a guest was chosen.</p><p>Koga had exploded in laughs while Ren had blinked several times before smiling politely with his new date voucher in hand.</p><p>Kyoko herself had contained some laughs. She knew that in the past Koga wasn't especially fond of Ren and it apparently hadn't changed if what people told her was true though she hadn't checked with Ren himself so maybe it was more complicated than that nowadays.</p><p>A few minutes passed while people quieten after the uproar the new "date" of Tsuruga Ren and Koga was largely discussed. <em>It's going to reinforce the rumour of him being gay, that's for sure </em>she thought, shaking her head. Poor Yashiro-san would have some more work to control all of it.</p><p>Then her name was called.</p><p>She sighed. What could she risk? Didn't all risky things had been given already? What more could come out of this damn pink thing?</p><p>Sweating internally, she stood again and walked to the monstrous thing.</p><p>She had given six names. Kanae and Ren as safe people and Momose, Kijima, Hikaru and Hiou as people she enjoyed spending time with and knew. She didn't have much of a choice. She didn't know much of anyone beside a few at this party. She had been away for a long time. She didn't even know Kijima that much. She had known Hikaru and Hiou but there was too much time passed to say that she knew who they were anymore. Especially Hiou who though mature already before had still had a fair amount of time to develop and change. The only people she could say she really still knew tonight were Maria-chan, Kanae and Ren. Of course she put them on the list. Well, despite Maria's name because she went to bed after the Wheel-of-Gift conclusion.</p><p>She grumbled against herself some more before closing in. Ruto-san didn't ask her if she wanted to use only her safe people. Because of course he did his work well so he knew. Damn Ruto-san.</p><p>Deciding she couldn't do anything about it anyway, she pushed on the wood baton permitting the wheel to turn.</p><p>The pointer spun between the few remaining white cases, only three in fact, for some time until it finally stopped.</p><p>The white carton triangle was removed and you could read:<strong><em>A diner date with someone chosen by LME. </em></strong></p><p>
  <em>Thanks god.</em>
</p><p>It was a normal one.</p><p>A name was pulled out from the little hand-wheel.</p><p>She got herself a diner with Hikaru.</p><p>So far, so good. Only one left.</p><p>She eyed the president, nearly out of his seat with how far he was bending on the edge of it, and he grinned at her.</p><p>Right. It couldn't be that easy.</p><p>Ruto-san waved to her to proceed and make the wheel swirl again.</p><p>She nodded and pushed on the wood baton.</p><p>The pink wheel rolled and rolled, spinning faster this time, probably out of the sudden spite Kyoko was feeling at her boss scheming.</p><p>The wheel stopped moving, the point on some white triangle again.</p><p>The gloved hand of Ruto-san passed by her reaching for the carton, when the president shouted out, stopping him.</p><p>"Wait", the president said raising his hand with an annoying glim in the pupil, "Wouldn't it be more fun for the last person if we pull out the person with who it will be first?" he proposed to the crowd and they all cheered, happily.</p><p>"What? No, why would it matter, now?" she objected, not that it would change things but her damn boss was messing with her, clearly. No way was she making it easy for him in those conditions.</p><p>Her voice fell into deaf ears of course and his assistant obliged him diligently.</p><p>He took back the little hand-wheel and begun to make it spin. A name came out.</p><p>Turning her back to the crowd, she openly glared at the little square of paper. Of course.</p><p>Ruto took the little square in his black gloved hands, turned and presented it to the guests. Kyoko did her best to wear a neutral smile.</p><p>Chuckles, jealous whines and comments all erupted in the big ballroom while Kyoko made it her mission to not cross the stare of that person. Once the room calmed down the president gave his approval to Ruto-san to remove the white triangle.</p><p>It was quickly done.</p><p>The written letters appeared showing what it was saying.</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em> Stay in the lap of someone chosen for the remaining of the evening.</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>Ruto-san took his time explaining to her exactly what was behind. She was to keep company to the person chosen be being in his lap or let him rest in yours if at any moment he would prefer that.</p><p>Kyoko thought she died a little inside. She blocked the images blooming in her mind.</p><p>
  <em>Fucking hell!</em>
</p><p>The silence was heavy. Not hostile. Just, in the expectative. Holding their breaths.</p><p>She didn't say a word, didn't look at anyone. Even less him.</p><p>She took her voucher from Ruto-san staring at the bright golden letter printed upon request stating her curse with a frightening perfection: <em>coupon for keeping company to Tsuruga Ren in his lap.</em></p><p>It was official. She wanted to murder the president. Yes, the very man who was barely repressing his laughs and silencing himself on his prominent golden cushion.</p><p>She pocketed the coupon because Ren's present was just that perfect. It had of course pockets.</p><p>The previous mutism was still present but the minute she turned away from the wheel, all the eyes on her followed as she slowly, very slowly walked between the guests.</p><p>The little groups of people watched her pass by, smiles turning up, bright and teasing, they all considered it a game and for once women weren't shooting daggers at her just tagging along with this curse. She was also sure they could feel her awkwardness despite her best efforts at being nonchalant about it. The spell was broken when a loud whistle came, disrupting the soundless atmosphere. Kijima.</p><p>Other catcalls trailed after him. She tracked the sounds. Ren's friends. Kaï, she thought she heard his name earlier, was one of them. They were all cheering loudly, teasing as much her own person as him apparently. She smiled, amused, regardless of the trepidation of her heart and the deep awkwardness she felt inside, and to her greatest surprise she started to relax.</p><p>Yes, yes, she knew why it felt special. But at the same she was sure she couldn't at a safer place that where she would soon be if he was opposed to it. Which he totally could. Should even. He wasn't obliged to play mad president's games at all. He had an image to protect. It was already bad they danced several times together tonight. Rumours would already rage on tomorrow and with this? It would be hectic.</p><p>Though she guessed it would have been much worse if it wasn't mainly due to the game they found themselves but on their own intent.</p><p>She fought a new urge to turn crimson, so happy her skills had developed in this matter over the years. It wasn't perfect. More so when he was concerned. But make-up could do the rest most of the times and she hadn't had to fret over circumstances where it would less easy for years. Still, she was pretty sure people could overlook some light hue, considering.</p><p>She slowly reached his form, now sitting crossed-legs on a huge red pillow able to handle his frame after the closing up that had made him let go of the armchair he had been apparently sitting in earlier.</p><p>He watched her approach, arching a brow at the amused smile still present on her face but overall very still, very unmoving like he was afraid she would flee.</p><p>She wanted to laugh. She could hide the truth to him, lie to everyone but her heart knew. And it wanted nothing more than to go there and stay even if her head knew it was very dangerous as an exposition. Even when she was rebelling very much against those feelings so that she wouldn't show them.</p><p>She walked the remaining meters separating them, meandering her way between his friends and teasing guests.</p><p>It was kind of placating to know people were just enjoying themselves and tagging along with how things worked for tonight, for this play. But she was apprehensive of when it would stop and people would begin to condemn her for daring to play along. For not thinking about just plainly refusing.</p><p>Most of her mind stayed focus on the now close statue, though, immobile but still open, waiting.</p><p>Her feet eventually brushed the big pillow and he cranked his neck as for once she was the one watching him from above.</p><p>"Do you mind?" she asked.</p><p>"Come here" he replied, opening his arms.</p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I love evil cliffhangers and you are going to hate me for this one, nnyarkk, nyark, nyark. HEHEHE…my my, some people are going to be turn crazy with this one, happy me. Yes, I'm sadistic. Enjoy. Kisses. Miamagfan.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0056"><h2>56. The Christmas ball Cozying around -part 3-</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does.</p><p> </p><p>Enjoy. Will that be the last cozying part? I wonder?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There were several things going through her brain as the delicate hue burgeoned on her face despite her best instincts to hide it and keep a void face. But upon the sight of those wide-spread arms and open smile; her members failed her. Her knees gave away to settle with a soft thud on the cushion between the huge legs of Ren, her face merely a few inches away from his.</p><p>She still couldn't believe he had just dropped that in front of everyone.</p><p>
  <em>"Come here"                 </em>
</p><p>
  <em>…seriously…</em>
</p><p>She glanced at Lory avoiding by that manoeuvre the intense gaze of the man in front of her and didn't like once a bit the sickening drooling-of-happiness smile he sported.</p><p>Lory eyed her pointedly, clearly stating his demand and Kyoko turned back to Ren, forced to cave.</p><p>She coughed, trying to clear her throat before whispering under the gaze of countless guests eyeing her in her back.</p><p>"How can I bother you the less?"</p><p>He seemed to relax even more and smiled.</p><p>"Didn't I just say you weren't?"</p><p>She rubbed her neck sheepishly.</p><p>"I meant, in which position?"</p><p>His eyes darkened for a second and he tensed but Kyoko kept her gaze on him, confused until he arched a brow pointedly. She replied in kind and they kept at it for some time until her jaw dropped in realization of how it could be interpreted.</p><p>This time, she did, turned crimson and crossed her arms ignoring his teasing all together and arching, once more in inquire, her eyebrow.</p><p>He chuckled.</p><p>"Turned around", he finally replied, brushing her shoulders to make her shift and eliciting a discreet shudder in her.</p><p>She twisted around obediently, feeling very self-conscious of her every move and trying her best to not brush him in any way. Of course, her best efforts were useless. Once, because the position just didn't allow that and second, her partner of infortune seemed to be less than reluctant, compared to her, in accomplishing their punishment and was swift to push her back against his broad torso once turned around, making her half-strangled herself. He then nonchalantly circled his arms around her middle, letting rest his forearms on the high of her thighs.</p><p>She shifted to the most immobile human flesh's figure, barely breathing at all as she felt him moved his head toward the president.</p><p>"Would that suit you, dear president?" he asked, intonations sugar sweet between gritted teeth with the all-too-familiar lying smile she used to know.</p><p>The president nodded, mostly reduced to goo so much he enjoying himself with the view and eagerly asked a change of music would be made as embarrassed laughs and whispers could be heard in every corner of the room.</p><p>Feeling the anger that sipped from around her, Kyoko couldn't help to wriggle, trying to find a place to put her hands on. But in her attempts in doing so she inadvertently placed her hand on a very private area of him, driving him into an incredible fist of coughs. She didn't know if those were due to his embarrass or a mere tentative to distract any viewer to guess what just occurred but she felt mortified.</p><p>Sheer shame transfixed her face and she apologized with profusion, very much trying to not think about it.</p><p>"Sorry, sorry", she whispered, "I should have paid more attention, I felt you were angry and couldn't help to move, sorry. You okay? I didn't hurt you, did I?" She babbled in concern.</p><p>He hid his expression in the shadows of his hair for one lonely second before a subdued constricted smile appeared. He shook his head and was about to say something when a new song, a little louder begun.</p><p>He made sign with his hand for her to regain the position of before but remained tense and she was not so sure he was alright.</p><p>She sat in the gap residing inside his crossed legs she was settled in a minute ago and draped her crossed calves on his own right one, guessing it was the best she could push to without getting him uncomfortable and without touching him too much.</p><p>He brought back his arms around her, not touching her much, giving her space and rested his forearms where they were before she manhandled his masculinity. She blushed again at the thought and cursed Lory one more time as the tender warm of his arms blazed through her pullover making a tingle rippled from her arms to her belly and nipples.</p><p>Indeed, she hated the president at this instant.</p><p>Kijima and Kai soon came to seat themselves near Ren and Kyoko resisted the urge to wriggle again as they both started to chat with them, feeling too aware of Ren in her back.</p><p>The Christmas tales began and Kyoko tried to pay attention, she loved tales, especially the magical ones, but she was too conscious of her situation and her mind started to wander at the middle of the first story, which was apparently already pretty long.</p><p>She vaguely acknowledged people still whispering time to time about them, they were all closer to each other than before now so she could hear some of them mumble sometimes. And she had paid a keen attention to it at first, on edge and waiting for the first derogatory remark.</p><p>But to her surprise, it could have been worse. Yes, some women were jealous and saying things around the lines of her not suiting him, not that she didn't know already; but most people seemed to have accepted the situation as part of the evening. It seemed the game of the night was playing as a protection of seeing it as anything else.</p><p>An internal sigh of relief went through her.</p><p>She didn't know how Ren was feeling about the situation but she was quite sure it couldn't be glorious seeing as his fingers compulsively closed and opened every few seconds.</p><p>He was clearly on edge and awkward with the situation.</p><p>Kijima pulled her out of those displeasing thoughts when he turned his attention on her.</p><p>"So, are you comfortable, Kyoko-chan?" he cheekily questioned, closing in a bit with a big goofy grin.</p><p>"I'm fine" she replied as neutral as possible.</p><p>Kijima smirked.</p><p>"Oh? Really? He said, "I could have sworn you loved tales of all kind though and you don't seem to pay much attention", he noted, rubbing his chin, and added with a smile, "You both look rather tense, why don't you relax a bit?"</p><p>And he brought his face to Kyoko's one level and whispered with a secret smirk something she weirdly thought was address to both of them:</p><p>"A little touch won't kill you"</p><p>She retreated her body on instinct and found herself pressed against the broad chest that had stayed an hair away from her all the time since she settled back. She attempted to move back but strong arms closed upon her, his biceps glued to her sides, forearms and sexy hands circling her waist possessively in a refined mild restrain rather than laying on her thighs as before. The weight was faint and comfortable but she felt like it was so heavily burning though at the same much too light of a touch.</p><p>Then his scent engulfed her and she stopped breathing altogether.</p><p>"Screw off, Kijima" she heard the rumble of Ren's words echoed as he glared at Kijima and she stayed frozen, trying to not rub her nose in his chest to get more of his delicious forest scent. She took a shaky breath before clamping her breathing off again but once secluded in that embrace she quickly felt it was difficult to stay as strained and tense despite the awkwardness she was feeling. And she wasn't long to discover his odour had started to appease her as soon as it seeped through her nostrils making her relax through and through at the contact of the comforting feeling and scent.</p><p> </p><p>Kijima just smirked and Ren sent him away to fetch some drinks so he would let them in peace it appears. She stayed a bit tense though and knowing they still have some time before the end of the night, Ren tried to distract her and get her back on the tales. She did but didn't relax completely.</p><p>He did his best to think about disgusting things and only that. She was just too close for his body to stay indifferent and when he failed to suppress some thoughts-like how pleasant her body felt against him, How much he wanted to run his hands on her curves and in her hair, how wonderful her butt was, how- he shifted until he found a position where she wouldn't risk brushing the very obvious display of affection and desire he was feeling.</p><p>He should have been glad she had hurt him a bit earlier because it was preventing him to react too much at the moment. But he couldn't help his thoughts more than he could with some primary reactions. His hands were shaking from restraining his compulsions repeatedly. The warm of her scent was making him want to doze off but the softness and firmness of her body were driving him nuts. He didn't know what he desired more, fall asleep or ravage her were both options that he was sure to exist. But there was also the wish to stay as he was forever, embracing her until he would die.</p><p>His bothersome friend eventually came back though and presented them with two cups of punch. Ren saw Kyoko hesitated a bit though he didn't know why before taking the cup and sniffing it before gulping it in one swift motion with a slight grimace.</p><p>"You okay?" he asked before following her example because he really needed it and she nodded though she didn't seem to be.</p><p>She relaxed some more after that and Ren instinctively made himself as comfortable as he could so that she wouldn't hurt herself on some of his hard members. He was now a cushion. He needed to think of his body as the most perfect pillow. He repeated this as a mantra, brainwashing his mind to think he was a comfy object.</p><p>But not able to loosen up himself completely, he eventually inquired if Kai, Kijima had went in search of another woman, could bring him another drink. And another.</p><p>He stopped after the third one, feeling he was a little more slacked, it wasn't punch anymore after all but if he wanted to have sobered up to go home, it was better to stop.</p><p>People came between tales to talk to them, as both him and Kyoko weren't allowed to stand or move, and joked about their predicament. Each time Kyoko answered in stride, appearing unstressed and casual about it and to his displeasure, regularly repeating it was all a game.</p><p>Bur what could he say?</p><p>
  <em>No, it's not a game, it feels real to me…</em>
</p><p>Of course he couldn't.</p><p>The same way he couldn't say this situation didn't bother him the least and that if it wasn't for the other guests and his unruly urges, he would gladly stay like that forever.</p><p>More tales were told and her friend, Kotonami-san, made her way to them after the end of another, engaging Kyoko in an animated discussion with the latter appeared highly amused with something. The reason behind it soon caught up to him and he listened with interest to this new information, his ears in joy each time her voice sang out just near him or through his chest cavity.</p><p>Then he lost the battle he had been fighting and was lulled to slumber by her enchanting voice.</p><p> </p><p>Kyoko was listening with a big goofy smile Kanae talked about her issues with Hiou and what just happened thanked to the curse wheel, all too amused the state of her friend and also far more sober than moments before, such a passionate chat directed at her having done wonders. She could feel Ren's presence on her back but didn't want to turn around and since he seemed pretty okay with merely listening, she didn't see the need to brought back the awkwardness of the situation to the front board.</p><p>Still, despite her friends concerns, she was sure it was fixable if her friend could turn into panic mode for him. She also felt pretty touched that after all this time, her friend still decided to confide in her and with Ren close by and most likely listening to them as he didn't really a choice in that matter being directly taped to her.</p><p>She was thinking about what to tell Kanae when she realized suddenly that her friend had stopped talking and then she heard a subdued throttle on her side and glanced as a bend-over Kai, holding his sides and shaking in silent.</p><p>"No way…"Burped out a slightly tipsy Kijima seated at the other side of the room, surrounded by women and Kyoko- taking note of the whisper those two little escaped words had been but still heard by her- was brought to a new grasping stupor when the full silence of the room dawned on her.</p><p>The second thing that came to her attention was that everyone was looking at her.</p><p>She eyed her friend, frank question in the eye and Kanae pointed back with her chin at her it appeared.</p><p>
  <em>What's the matter?</em>
</p><p>Her friend sighed.</p><p>"Just look to the side" and she edged at her left side.</p><p>That the exact moment Kyoko chose to realize the weight she felt on her shoulder and she turned her head an inch discovering a handsome and peaceful face dropped on it. Face owned by a significantly and mighty asleep Ren.</p><p>He wasn't making a sound and his respiration though profound was soundless. If it hadn't been for the weight new noticed weight on her shoulder and slightly on her back, she wouldn't have been able to notice it.</p><p>But regardless of the fond surprise and utter adorableness she felt threatened to be overwhelmed with, as everyone else one thing supplanted the others. That is, the debilitating shock of the vision of such serene defenceless Ren Tsuruga.</p><p>That was not something she had ever had the chance to ever see in the past before. She was sure of it. She had already seen him relaxed in the past but this was otherworldly.</p><p>He was so tranquil. It must have been the only reason she didn't perceived his presence weighing on her back right away.</p><p>It was also the source of the gaping mouths all around the room.</p><p>Because, truly, who could claim they had ever see Tsuruga Ren so serene or even asleep? No one.</p><p>Well, she had seen him sleeping but certainly not like that.</p><p>It was one of the rarer unknown sights of him.</p><p>Though she didn't really understand how he had been able to relax so much with such a crowd all around them. She knew he could be obsessed with having control of things. Being so carefree among strangers wasn't something he would usually be fond of, unless he had more changed than she thought.</p><p>She knew he had a few drinks but again. Sleeping wasn't a low level of exposure and helplessness. She was absolutely sure he would rather avoid finding himself in that sort of uncontrolled display under the eyes of hundreds of person in a very usually private setting if he could help it.</p><p>
  <em>Or was he that tired?</em>
</p><p>She stared at his face with concern. Maybe it was out of exhaustion? She was weary herself after her fast travel back here and it was most likely around 5 am by now. Some ring could be seen around his eyes but it wasn't that bad compared to what she knew it could be on a person.</p><p>His presence was soothing though and she didn't think she would hold on against tiredness herself much longer. There were other reasons why she needed to extricate quickly of this situation though.</p><p>One was obviously her poor fluttering heart to which such cuteness had been a huge strike against her indolence and fake indifference.</p><p>"I can't believe he would just fall asleep like that" said Kai with amazement watching him on close-up position and clearly looking bewildered at the view of his friend sleeping.</p><p>"He's never loosening up that much, especially in public!" he said for the nth time again.</p><p>Her own friend just shook her head and said to Kai to take a picture for posterity. Kyoko frowned at their antics but she trusted them enough to not bother.</p><p>A more pressing issue required her concentration as the attention it was gathering wasn't small play. They all wanted to see Ren Tsuruga sleeping from closer look.</p><p>She knew it was the game set up by Lory but she saw some people taking pictures of him while giggling and lot of guests gathering around them to whisper and gush over Ren sleeping view.</p><p>Kyoko began to feel sick. She knew he was cute but he wasn't in a state to defend himself and they were all observing him like he was an animal in a zoo or some piece of meat to share as some women even fought to come closer to peer at him.</p><p>She glared at those ones and tried to move around a little to hid his sight from some creeping guests.</p><p>It didn't work and when Ren just curled up even more and sighed blissfully, looking even cuter, it provoked the expected reaction.</p><p>"Awwwww-..." did the near totality of guests, softened expressions all around, and Kyoko huffed a puff of air. If he was getting any cuter, she wouldn't be able to do anything even when he would have woken up. She really didn't like this, they were all getting pictures of him sleeping cutely.</p><p>The relaxing feeling she was getting from being gummed to him was also getting to her and she yawning more and more.</p><p>There was no questioning it. She glanced at the president, warning him to just think about protesting but the infuriating man was taping the all scene and just nodded distantly with a wave of the hand, clearly not the least preoccupied by the potential ruining this could do to his most famous charge reputation.</p><p>Fine.</p><p>Screw the game. No way in hell would she let him get abused like that.</p><p>"If any of you think about damaging his reputation and posting any compromising pictures on social medias", she harshly threatened and cranked her head toward the president pointedly showing to every guest when he nodded severely.</p><p>The guests all agreed reverently and she thought, the risk of pursuits from LME would be prevent any more risky move. But then someone on the side with a characteristic camera around his neck spoke.</p><p>"If you would excuse me, president. But, you can easily guess why I can't allow that", pointed out the journalist. "It's my job"</p><p>Lory appeared to ponder at this, vaguely irritated, before smoothly replying with a proposition.</p><p>"If you can assure me we only see my male charge and not Mogami-kun, I might allow it. It's a game and I wouldn't want to create uproar and rumours on something only based on these settlements"</p><p>"I can't do that", answered the journalist with a shake of his head, "It's too juicy, my boss will murder me if I let it pass, president. I need to least show Tsuruga-san is resting on a womanly figure" he lowly added so to not wake the reason of all those heated whispers.</p><p>"But I could ensure we would only see her shoulder or a part of her body but never the charming face of Mogami-san", counter-proposed the man with a sweet smile directed at Kyoko who gratefully smiled back, making the man blush. "And I'll be sure to not forget it was only for the president's game's sake" he assured with an odd renewed determination.</p><p>Kyoko thanked him and shifted back to the president.</p><p>"Would it preserve his reputation?" she questioned but it was too low for the president to hear and guests relayed her message. Discussing through silent glance was one thing but raising her voice just beside him would wake him up and notwithstanding the awkwardness she felt and the worries she had about all the guests watching him like he looked so tired she still felt reluctant about disturbing him.</p><p>Once her question reached the president, he nodded once and she relaxed a bit even through the flashes from the camera that followed for a minute. The man promised again and Ruto led him away to sign some disclosure documents.</p><p>She turned to watch all the guests gathering around them and murmured to them.</p><p>"I hope you will all be able to be sensitive about this", she demanded them sternly and wishing it will suffice, "I'm sure you can all see he is exhausted and most of you and if everyone know he isn't the type to let go like that; it would be especially unfair if he was punished for his exhaustion. On Christmas day" She stretched.</p><p>"I know some of you might be especially displeased by this", she added slowly as she glanced at some of the women she heard mumbles rude comments about her earlier, "But you can just imagine myself as a fortunate pillow and as something that would never have happened if the opportunity of the game didn't gave it and if he wasn't especially tired".</p><p>She kept her stare on the women.</p><p>"This", She waved with the tips of her fingers, "means nothing" she insisted for them. "It's an accident due to sheer exhaustion and us being friends and that's all"</p><p>She caged their gazes in hers until she was sure they had accepted her words and the women shook their heads up and down, looking slightly more appeased and understanding.</p><p>She breathed a sigh. For this would do. It should protect from the worse happening.</p><p>The tales resumed and the photographer closed in once he packed back his camera.</p><p>"I'm afraid it won't prevent rumours", he commented with the tone of a person knowing too well how things work and slightly bitter about it.</p><p>"You're right", admitted Kai that had stayed as a guardian near them after everyone settled back on their cushion, "But rumours and direct report of witnesses are two different things. And they at least won't dare to give Mogami-kun's name away with this"</p><p>Kyoko agreed.</p><p>Some people might drop in dribs and drabs they knew who had been the pillow of Tsuruga Ren at the ball or that it was someone he knew but after the untold threat of the president and her warning; they won't dare more.</p><p>And as long as there was no name, it would easily become a legend, some mystical thing that was supposed to had happened on the Christmas ball of the president making it all very difficult to believe even with pictures of Ren sleeping.</p><p>Soon they would believe those pictures are stolen from another situation or fabricated.</p><p>At least, she was fervently praying for it.</p><p>They continued to listen to tales for a small hour but guests were tired and getting sleepy or dispersed through and through. Kyoko, for her part, was losing the fight against drowsiness. She so tired and it was just too good. She felt such a comfort and joy from being in his arms. His scent was engulfing her and clinging to her after all this time; she had not a chance to escape it. His warm spread in spades around her and in her, filling her with a sense of belonging like never. She would have given everything to stay in this tight solid embrace even if she was to drown herself in it.</p><p>She wanted to draw back her knees against her, turn to the side or to the back and bring her hands against his boiling chest then pressed her head to it and forget about the outside world. She had no stronger desire at the moment. The urge to curl up within the soft cage of his hold like a cat or a small child was just <em>that</em> overwhelming.</p><p>But this crushing sensation also came with the guilt it shouldn't have happened and her debilitating misery of what couldn't be. Each time she inspired and smelled his reassuring scent and felt his presence she wanted less and less to leave but to every inspiration the reality of the illusion she was living at the moment was also making itself more present, more blazingly glaring; clamouring the ordinary truth. The impossibility of her own fairy-tale.</p><p>She ended up violently withholding crippling bulky water from crashing down her face and was almost happy when the night came to an end and she was forced to start the process of waking him up. Guests greeted her goodbye as they began to leave, too wore down to actually care about anything but heading home. Even the women who had been jealous didn't even cast them a glance.</p><p>Swallowing her emotion, she clamped on her will and inspired a good gulp of air before managing to compose herself.</p><p>She delicately shifted and a yawn escaped her. She was completely drained.</p><p>She brushed his shoulder and shook him a bit, trying to a reaction but he appeared just all too content and not the least moving. He wasn't bulging at all. He was apparently out cold.</p><p>
  <em>You're really too cute for your own good…</em>
</p><p>She sighed and yawned again.</p><p>She brushed some bangs away from his forehead and rocked him again, softly calling him this time.</p><p>"Ren, come on, Ren, Kuon, do you hear me?", she called. "Come on, the party is finished, it's time. Ren, Ren, come on Ren", she whispered louder this time.</p><p>After some more prompting, he eventually hummed at her and breached out full-of-slumber eyes at her, his eyelids difficulty opened and perfectly comfortable and ready to return to blissful reverie any time soon if his closing eyes were any indication.</p><p>"Oh no, you don't", she told, "The party ended, it's time to go home, wake up, Ren"</p><p>"Not now…" he mumbled, definitively trying to go back to sleep.</p><p>"Yes now", she insisted, "do I look like a pillow?" she grumbled before crossing her arms.</p><p>He snorted and slightly nodded before unlocking his drowsy eyes to look at her again.</p><p>"At some times at least" he added from the tip of those sexy lips stretching into a smile as he was obviously thinking about something.</p><p>Now she was really curious of what she looked like to him at other times.</p><p>He closed his lips again.</p><p>"Rennn…"</p><p>He mumbled and smiled but when his eyes found her gaze again he finally looked a bit awake.</p><p>"Christmas ball? Party finished? Going home?", she enumerated, "Does any of that finally ring a bell?"</p><p>His eyes suddenly popped out and he groaned and dropped his head back on her shoulder.</p><p>"Damn…"</p><p>"Finally!"</p><p>"I fell asleep during the storytelling, right?" he said more as a confirmation than as a true question.</p><p>"Yes, you did" Kyoko confirmed, chuckling and yawning.</p><p>"How bad is the damage?" he mumbled.</p><p>"I think you are safe" she replied.</p><p>He lifted his head with inquiring eyes.</p><p>She gave him a reassuring smile.</p><p>"We will see your sleeping face in the papers of tomorrow morning that is for sure", she started, "but no one will see my face neither the name of who it was" she explained. "So beside the embarrassment of it all, your reputation won't suffer from it according the president"</p><p>"And to whom do I own this miraculous salvation?" Ren questioned with smile.</p><p>She wriggled and stretched a cautious smile, hoping their decision would suit him.</p><p>"I kind of threatened the guests", she began, "And Lory bargained and threatened the journalist that was present"</p><p>A low chuckle escaped him.</p><p>"I see. Thank you" he said before stretching with a yawn. He would have like to thank her more warmly but he was just too out of it to really realized things at this point.</p><p>"Any time" She replied in a hurry they would drop the subject and his attention on her.</p><p>He smiled at her adorableness.</p><p>She yawned again provoking one in Ren and weakly smiled before carefully standing from between Ren's legs, helping herself on his shoulder and reaching out her hand at him.</p><p>"Let's go home" spoke Kyoko out.</p><p>His eyes twinkled at her as she said that but he didn't share what her words inspired in him.</p><p>He took her hand and she lifted him up before heading to their stuff quickly, feeling embarrassed all of sudden.</p><p>They retrieved their things and bid goodbye to the president before slowly directing themselves to the parking lot. Kyoko felt especially tired and kept yawning. Thus, though troubled, she accepted that he would give her a lift.</p><p>But upon reaching Ren's car, she saw how much he was fighting the drowsiness and was shaking his head to eliminate the sluggishness out of him. Then he yawned and rubbed head and eyes again, undeniably trying to shake himself but failing.</p><p>That was it.</p><p>"We should take a cab", she proposed, "We are both in no state to drive, it's 6 am. I think it's safer that way"</p><p>He nodded without opposing any resistance and if anything was proof of her right choice, this was it.</p><p>She took charge of calling Ruto-san to ask if he could take care of Ren's car while Ren called a cab for them and they were lucky because it was apparently the one of the last one before the afternoon.</p><p>They had nearly fallen asleep in the car when the cab arrived and Ren took their stuff before she could prevent him and put everything in the cab before giving an address.</p><p>Taming back her now messed up hair, she forced her groggy form to move and followed after him with moult yawns and settled in the back seat with him.</p><p>She was dozing on soft cushion, probably Ren's shoulder, at this point, she couldn't care anymore when the cab stopped.</p><p>But it's only when Ren begun to apologize that she realized something was apparently not okay.</p><p>Barely catching to put a hand in front her mouth in time, she yawned again and tried to make sense to what he was saying.</p><p>"Can you repeat that, please?" she mumbled.</p><p>His eyes softened and he obliged.</p><p>"I said, "I'm sorry, I instinctively gave my address to the driver", explained Ren, "and this stubborn man refuse to do another travel no matter how much I tried to bride him" he grumbled at the end.</p><p>"I see".</p><p>That's all she figured to say because her drowsy mind was having an hard time catching up.</p><p>"So?"</p><p>He chuckled, seeming barely more awaked than her but her brain finally came to the realization of what he was talking about.</p><p>"I'm sorry" she apologized.</p><p>Ren shook his head.</p><p>"I can't seem to figure out why you are apologizing, I'm the one you did a mistake"</p><p>She shook herself a bit and tried to explain why she felt like she was bothering him so much but gave up, too tired.</p><p>She was wondering how to break open one of the cars of the parking lot of Ren to sleep in until cabs stations would open again and drowsing off when he spoke again.</p><p>"So, since it appeared I rob you of the possibility to go back to your home", he stated, looking particularly ashamed of this if she relied on his tone, "Would that suit you to stay over?"</p><p>She blinked at him and sleepily nodded.</p><p>He vaguely smiled, payed for their travel and took their stuff despite her weak protestations before exiting the cab.</p><p>Drugged with tiredness, they made their way to his flat in some sort of lethargic torpor and once inside Ren quickly dropped his stuff in room and placed her things and presents in the guest room and came back with a bundle of clothes in his hand barely a minute later. He had apparently had time to change to put on pyjamas in those 60 seconds though maybe it was more and her dozing against the wall had something to do with her perception of things.</p><p>He yawned again and he presented her with the bundle.</p><p>"It's old large clothes", he explained, "it should be comfy enough for sleep. There are also a toothbrush and toothpaste and there should still be the minimum toiletries in the guest bathroom" he added.</p><p>She nodded.</p><p>"Thanks"</p><p>He gave her an one-arm hug over the shoulder to which she answered groggily and check on her one last time.</p><p>"'Night"</p><p>"'Night" She replied and after vague waves of the hands, they both went straight to their bedrooms.</p><p>Kyoko slipped on the clothes without sparing them a glance and after a quick brush, dropped dead on the bed feeling safe and content, comforted by the feeble scent emitted by the clothes. She had a last thought for Snow, glad she had fed her enough for it to last through the day and decided that the president parties were definitively too damn exhausting for her taste.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Anyway, I hope you will like this chapter. It's a funny but also an emotional one.<br/>And I'm kind of glad I finally finished the ball part. It was such a big part to write. I hadn't even planned to make it last that long, haha.<br/>I hope everyone is well and kicking where you are all living and that no one is sick of covid or any illness though I know it's an utopic thought, but still.<br/>I wasn't planning to update 40 fucking in one go, you can imagine. But as you might ory ou might not know fanfiction.net is glitching. No new/updated chapters are accessible even when you get the email so even i was planning to polish this fanfic before posting it here, i had no choice. Poor readers are waiting and this is currently the only possibility available.(it's not some minor issue, it's been out for 5-6 days already apparently, still hope it gets fixed but in the meanwhile, you will be able to read it here. Kisses to everyone. Mimagafan.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I do not own skip beat! Yoshiki Nakamura does. Enjoy. Reviews are food for writers. Feed me.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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